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<title>
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My Secret Life, Volume 3
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by Anonymous
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</title>
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</head>
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<body>
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<br><br>
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<h1>
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MY SECRET LIFE
|
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</h1><br>
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|
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<h3>Volume Three</h3><br>
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<h2>
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By Anonymous
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</h2><br><br>
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<center>
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AMSTERDAM
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</center>
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<center>
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PRIVATELY PRINTED FOR SUBSCRIBERS. 1888
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</center><br><br>
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|
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<blockquote>
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<p><i>This first reprint of "My Secret Life" is for private distribution
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||
among connoisseur collectors. It is strictly limited to four hundred
|
||
and seventy five copies, all of which have been subscribed for prior to
|
||
publication.</i></p>
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</blockquote>
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<br>
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<br>
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<hr>
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<br>
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<br>
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<h2>Contents</h2>
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||
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<center>
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<table summary="">
|
||
<tr><td>
|
||
|
||
|
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<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_TOC">
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DETAILED CONTENTS
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0001">
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||
CHAPTER I.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0002">
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||
CHAPTER II.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0003">
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||
CHAPTER III.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0004">
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||
CHAPTER IV.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0005">
|
||
CHAPTER V.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0006">
|
||
CHAPTER VI.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0007">
|
||
CHAPTER VII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0008">
|
||
CHAPTER VIII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0009">
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||
CHAPTER IX.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0010">
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||
CHAPTER X.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0011">
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||
CHAPTER XL.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0012">
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||
CHAPTER XII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0013">
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||
CHAPTER XIII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0014">
|
||
CHAPTER XIV.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0015">
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||
CHAPTER XV.
|
||
</a></p>
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<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0016">
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CHAPTER XVI.
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||
</a></p>
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<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0017">
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CHAPTER XVII.
|
||
</a></p>
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||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0018">
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||
CHAPTER XVIII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0019">
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||
CHAPTER XIX.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0020">
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||
CHAPTER XX.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0021">
|
||
CHAPTER XXI.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0022">
|
||
CHAPTER XXII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
<p class="toc"><a href="#2HCH0023">
|
||
CHAPTER XXIII.
|
||
</a></p>
|
||
|
||
|
||
</td></tr>
|
||
</table>
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</center>
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|
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<br>
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<br>
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<hr>
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<br>
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<br>
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<a name="2H_TOC"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
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|
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|
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|
||
<h2>
|
||
DETAILED CONTENTS:
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<blockquote>
|
||
CHAPTER I.—Straightened circumstances.—Promiscuous whorings.—The
|
||
<br>
|
||
garden privies.—Our neighbor's daughters.—Effects of a hard
|
||
<br>
|
||
turd.—Masturbation.—Bum-trumpeting.—Seeing and hearing too much.—A
|
||
<br>
|
||
pock-marked strumpet.—A neighbour's servant.—Don't wet inside.—-On
|
||
<br>
|
||
the road home.—Cheap amusements.—Bargains.—Watching brothels.—Cunt
|
||
<br>
|
||
in the open. Clapped again.—French letters, and effects.—Income
|
||
<br>
|
||
improved.—Piddle in the bye-streets.—An uprighter.—My pencil-case.—A
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||
<br>
|
||
female bilker.—A savage frig.—A silk dress soiled.
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||
<br>
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||
<br>CHAPTER II.—Preliminary remarks.—A dress-lodger.—Lucy.—Sweet
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||
<br>
|
||
seventeen.—An impudent demand.—A row.—The bawd.—My watch
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||
<br>
|
||
requisitioned.—Exit barred.—Bill.—Funking.—Determination.—The
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||
<br>
|
||
poker and window.—Vici.—Apologies.—A cautious retreat.—My
|
||
<br>
|
||
revenge.—Lucy scared away.—Brighton Bessie.—Washing by
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||
<br>
|
||
fire-light.—Friendly intimacy.—The house in B..w Street.—Lascivious
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||
<br>
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||
evenings.
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||
<br>
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||
<br>CHAPTER III.—A change in taste.—A small cunt longed for.—Hunting
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||
<br>
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||
in the Strand.—Yellow-haired Kitty.—Her little companion.—Oh!
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||
<br>
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||
you foule.—The house in E.. t. r Street.—Double
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||
<br>
|
||
fees.—Kitty's pleasure.—Objections to washing.—Have the other
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||
<br>
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||
gal.—Cleanliness.—Home occupations.—I ain't gay.—Kitty's males.
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||
<br>
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||
<br>CHAPTER IV.—Little Pol consents.—Arsy-versy.—Broached, and howling.
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||
<br>
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||
—Kitty's vocalization.—A cheap virginity.—Two hours after.—Love's
|
||
<br>
|
||
money lost.—The street-gully.—Kitty pleases. Pol tires.—Kitty's
|
||
<br>
|
||
habits.—Friendliness and frankness.—Sausage rolls.—Confessions of
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||
<br>
|
||
lust.
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||
<br>
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||
<br>CHAPTER V.—Kitty's antecedents.—The fishmonger's.—Jim the shopman.
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||
<br>
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||
—Betty the maid.—Females in bed.—Mutual curiosity.—Letchery and
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||
<br>
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||
frigging.—Educated in coition.—Against the kitchen-wall.—Jim in
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||
<br>
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||
bed.—Betty's cunt washed out.—A look in the basin.—Cousin Grace,
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||
<br>
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||
and cousin Bob.—Bob on the spree.—A scuffle.—Topsy-turvy.
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||
<br>
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||
—Arsy-versy.—Bob's semen.—A masturbating duet.—Caught in the
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||
<br>
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||
act.—Kicked out.
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||
<br>
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||
<br>CHAPTER VI.—Sausage-rolls, and consequences.—Kitty's home.—The
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||
<br>
|
||
little ones.—A saucy cabman.—Catamenia.—Fucking economies.—Changing
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||
<br>
|
||
money.—Pol and the bargee.—Kit implicated.—A black eye and
|
||
<br>
|
||
bruised rump.—A little boy's cock.—Preparation for travel.—Kit's
|
||
<br>
|
||
regret.—Bessie in tears.—Amusements abroad.—Home again.—Kitty a
|
||
<br>
|
||
strumpet.—An evening at B.. w Street.—Kitty's eight months doings.
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||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER VII.—Brighton Bessie.—Change irresistable.—Bessie
|
||
<br>
|
||
in quod.—Lewd effects.—Spooning.—Her home.—Her
|
||
<br>
|
||
cabman.—Reflexions.—Two years after.—Five years later on.—The
|
||
<br>
|
||
mouse's promenade.—Bessie disappears.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER VIII.—Washerwomen.—Matilda and Esther.—A peep over a wall.—4
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||
<br>
|
||
Eaves dropping.—A girl's wants.—Shaking a tooleywag.—A promenade by
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||
<br>
|
||
a barrow.—Disclosures.—A snatch and a scuffle.—An assignation.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER IX.—Returning home.—In the churchyard.—Two female
|
||
<br>
|
||
laborers.—Among the tombs.—A sudden piss.—An arse on the weeds.—Torn
|
||
<br>
|
||
trowsers and a turd.—In front of the public house.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER X.—The washerwoman's lane.—An intention frustrated.—A slap on
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||
<br>
|
||
the face.—Choice language and temper.—A dinner in the Haymarket.—The
|
||
<br>
|
||
rocking-chair.—A lucky shove.—Up, and out in a second.—A quarrel, and
|
||
<br>
|
||
flight.—An enticing laugh.—The house in O...d.n Street.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XL—Esther meets me.—Vaux-hall.—Ex-harlot Sarah.—Esther
|
||
<br>
|
||
succumbs.—Big-arsed and bandy-legged.—Periodic fucking.—Matilda
|
||
<br>
|
||
invincible.—I part with Esther.—Her fortune.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XII.—Preliminary.—My taste for beauty of form.—Sarah
|
||
<br>
|
||
Mavis.—Midday in the Quadrant.—No. 13 J..s Street.—A bargain in
|
||
<br>
|
||
the hall.—A woman with a will.—Fears about my size.
|
||
<br>
|
||
Muck.—Cold-blooded.—Tyranny.—My temper.—Submission.—A revolt.—A
|
||
<br>
|
||
half-gay lady.—Sarah watches me.—A quarrel.—Reconciliation.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XIII.—Sarah's complaisance.—Mistress Hannah.—About
|
||
<br>
|
||
Sarah.—Sexual indifference.—After dinner.—Stark naked at last.—Her
|
||
<br>
|
||
form.—The scar.—Hannah's friendship.—The baudy house
|
||
<br>
|
||
parlour.—The Guardsman.—Sarah's greed.—A change in her manner.—A
|
||
<br>
|
||
miscarriage.—Going abroad.—I am madly in love.—Sarah's history.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XIV.—Poses plastiques.—Sarah departs.—My despair.—Hannah's
|
||
<br>
|
||
comfort.—Foolscap and masturbation.—Cheap cunt.—A mulatto.—The
|
||
<br>
|
||
baudy house accounts.—Concerning Sarah.—The parlour.—The gay ladies
|
||
<br>
|
||
there.—My virtue.—Louisa Fisher.—A show of legs.—The consequence on
|
||
<br>
|
||
me.—Effect on Mrs. Z.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XV.—Louisa Fisher.—Chaffing.—Her form and fucking.—A
|
||
<br>
|
||
supper in bed.—A lascivious night.—Meeting
|
||
<br>
|
||
afterwards.—Hannah's legs.—Intruders in the bed-room.—Louisa's
|
||
<br>
|
||
voluptuousness.—Enciente.—Her husband.—Her gentleman friend.—About
|
||
<br>
|
||
herself.—Illness.—Mrs. A.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XVI.—A friend's maid-servant.—Jenny.—Initial familiarity.—A
|
||
<br>
|
||
bum pinched.—Jenny communicative.—Her young man.—An attempt, a
|
||
<br>
|
||
failure, a faint, a look and a sniff.—Restoratives.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XVII.—When are women most lewd.—Garters, money and
|
||
<br>
|
||
promises.——About my servant.—The neckerchief. Armpits felt.—Warm
|
||
<br>
|
||
hints.—Lewd suggestions.—Baudy language.—Tickling.—Fanny
|
||
<br>
|
||
Hill.—Garters tried.—Red fingers.—Struggle, and escape.—Locked
|
||
<br>
|
||
out.—I leave.—Baudy predictions, and verification.233
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XVIII.—Fanny Hill sent to Jenny.—My next visit.—Thunder,
|
||
<br>
|
||
lightning, sherry, and lust.—A chase round a table.—The money
|
||
<br>
|
||
takes.—Tickling and micturating.—A search for Fanny Hill.—A chase
|
||
<br>
|
||
up the stairs.—In the bed-room.—Thunder, funk, and
|
||
<br>
|
||
lewdness.—Intimidation and coaxing.—Over and under.—A rapid
|
||
<br>
|
||
spender.—Virginity doubtful.—Fears, tears, and fucking.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XIX.—My soiled shirt.—Jenny's account of herself.—Fucking
|
||
<br>
|
||
and funking.—Poor John!—Of her pudenda.—Its sensitiveness.—Erotic
|
||
<br>
|
||
chat.—Startled by a caller.—Her married sister's unsatisfied
|
||
<br>
|
||
cunt.—How she prevented having children.—Doubts her husbands
|
||
<br>
|
||
fidelity.—Jenny taught the use of a French letter.—Hickery-pickery and
|
||
<br>
|
||
catamenial irregularities.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XX.—A Saturday afternoon.—Copulation interrupted.—Retreat
|
||
<br>
|
||
cut off.—Under the bed.—Enter sister.—The new dress.—Heat
|
||
<br>
|
||
and sweat.—Undressing.—Jenny's anxiety.—Sweating much,
|
||
<br>
|
||
and stripping.—Nature in its simplicity.—Nature in its
|
||
<br>
|
||
vulgarity.—Delicious peeps.—A cunt near my nose. Erotic
|
||
<br>
|
||
recklessness.—Fist-fucking.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XXI.—Further undressing.—Slippers wanted.—Toilet
|
||
<br>
|
||
operations.—The effects of hash and beer.—A windy escape.—Feeling for
|
||
<br>
|
||
the pot.—Sisters exeunt.—A crushed hat, and soiled trowsers.—A narrow
|
||
<br>
|
||
escape.—My benevolent intentions towards Jenny's sister.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XXII.—The Sunday following.—Chaste calculations.—The sister
|
||
<br>
|
||
alone.—My embarrassment.—Ale fetched.—Warm conversation.—Stiffening.
|
||
<br>
|
||
—Bolder talk.—An exhibition of masculinity.—A golden promise.—Lust
|
||
<br>
|
||
creeping.—Baudy dalliance.—Cock and cunt in conjunction.
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>CHAPTER XXIII.—Jenny's bed-room.—The money hidden.—On the bed.—Fears
|
||
<br>
|
||
of maternity.—Inspection of sex.—The use of a husband.—Another
|
||
<br>
|
||
Sunday.—Regrets and refusals.—Resistance overcome.—Jenny's
|
||
<br>
|
||
ignorance.—Her Master returns.—Difficulty in getting at Jenny.—Her
|
||
<br>
|
||
sister waylaid.—Against a fence.—Jenny's marriage, and rise in life.
|
||
<br>
|
||
</blockquote>
|
||
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>
|
||
<hr>
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>
|
||
|
||
<a name="2HCH0001"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER I.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Straightened circumstances.—Promiscuous whorings.—The
|
||
garden privies.—Our neighbour's daughters.—Effects of a
|
||
hard turd.—Masturbation.—Bum-trumpeting.—Seeing and
|
||
hearing too much.—A pock-marked strumpet.—A neighbour's
|
||
servant.—Don't wet inside.—On the road home.—Cheap
|
||
amusements.—Bargains.—Watching brothels.—Cunt in the
|
||
open.—Clapped again.—French letters, and effects.—Income
|
||
improved.—Piddle in the bye-streets.—An uprighter.—My
|
||
pencil-case.—A female bilker.—A savage frig.—A silk dress
|
||
soiled.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I felt such a void, that I came to the conclusion that I had fondly
|
||
loved Mary, and missed greatly her kind, sympathetic association. For
|
||
a long time I could think of nothing but her, even when I fucked other
|
||
women, and got so miserable about her, that I rushed into indiscriminate
|
||
cheap whoring again. I had still not money for the best class of women,
|
||
and did not like baudy houses; but there was no help for it, and so
|
||
whoring I went, and largely in the Strand, for at that time in E..t.r
|
||
and C. t...e Streets there were many and nice brothels at all prices.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But I for some time abstained from women, and had wet dreams. My mind
|
||
ran constantly on Mary, and when I saw a nice girl, used to wonder if
|
||
her cunt was like Mary's, and this specially of two girls about nineteen
|
||
and twenty years of age, daughters of one of our next-door neighbours.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The privies of the houses in our terrace were built in pairs, the garden
|
||
wall divided them and partly the cess-pool which was common to the two.
|
||
I used to take pleasure in watching to see these girls go to the privy,
|
||
and although the idea of a female evacuating revolted me, yet used to
|
||
try to get to our privy when one of the girls went to theirs, and would
|
||
stand smoking just inside the passage by the back-steps of my house,
|
||
tip-toeing to catch a glance of their heads, and stopping myself from
|
||
bogging sometimes, so that I might get there at the same time. Directly
|
||
I saw a head off I followed quietly, and if the weather was quite still
|
||
we could hear footsteps in each other's gardens too well.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The cess-pool had at the time I write of just been emptied, the turds
|
||
dropping and flopping down could be heard, it was not nice, but it did
|
||
not shock me. I liked to hear the girls' piddle splashing, and used to
|
||
push my prick back, and sit back on the seat, so that my piddle might
|
||
drop straight, and make much noise. It pleased me to hear the joint
|
||
rattle and splash we made if we pissed at the same time. I did this so
|
||
constantly, that I could tell which girl was there, for the piddle of
|
||
one always made twice as much splash as the other's. Up would stand my
|
||
prick, and often I could not piss for its stiffness, directly I heard
|
||
the girls splashing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One day I had a hardish motion, and was randy that morning almost to
|
||
pain. One of the girls was there. I strained, my cock got stiff, and
|
||
began to throb violently, and shot out its spunk as I strained. I
|
||
went back to the house, and just entering it saw the other daughter
|
||
go towards the privy. Back I went and sitting down frigged myself as I
|
||
heard her evacuations drop, so randy and charged with sperm was I.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After that I occasionally frigged myself at the privy, and used to
|
||
picture to myself the girls sitting there, their clothes up round
|
||
their rumps, and slightly up in front showing their limbs, and piddle
|
||
squirting, but I always thought of both girls as having cunts like
|
||
Mary's. After a time we knew a little of the girls, and when talking to
|
||
them I used to think of the same thing. The idea used to fascinate me,
|
||
and they used to say (I am told), that I was a strange man, for I always
|
||
stared at them as if I had never seen a woman before. They little knew
|
||
what was in my mind when I was staring.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Just after the emptying I could not only see their wax as it fell to the
|
||
bottom, but the paper with which they wiped their bums, and could hear
|
||
them fart. Sometimes the two came together. One day by a sudden whim
|
||
I let a fart as loud as I could, and heard a suppressed titter, they I
|
||
think never knew I could hear, for usually I tried to be as silent as
|
||
possible. I never coughed when there, and used to pull open my arse-hole
|
||
to lessen the noise of my trumpet, and singular as it may seem did this
|
||
out of a feeling of delicacy. Soon the cess-pool was half-filled, with
|
||
water, and I could only indistinctly hear. Then I grew tired of the
|
||
game, and again let off my sperm up cunts instead of spilling it on the
|
||
privy-floor, for sorrow always came over me as I saw it on the floor. A
|
||
few months after this I took a dislike to the girls through thinking of
|
||
what I had seen and heard of them, it seemed to shock my sentiment of
|
||
the beauty and delicacy of a woman.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A confused number of random whorings and miscellaneous fuckings took
|
||
place about this time, I cannot tell to a month or two, but it began
|
||
directly after Mary had gone. I tell of one or two of them.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At the back of the Lowther Arcade one night I took a poor little girl
|
||
seemingly about sixteen years old to a house. She had a nice but thin
|
||
form, and was as white as driven snow. When I had had her, I wanted to
|
||
see her face more clearly, but she held a handkerchief to it, and half
|
||
turned it away from the light, her privates she allowed to be inspected
|
||
as I liked.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was marked badly with the small-pox, and was nevertheless handsome,
|
||
but with that sad expression which the pock-marks often give. Gents did
|
||
not like it, she said. It was a dreadfully sloppy, snowy night. "Don't
|
||
go yet", said she, "it is so warm here." So I sat a while feeling her
|
||
quim and talking. "Do me again, I want it now, I did not when you did
|
||
it before." So we fucked again. "Do I please you?" said the girl putting
|
||
her hand to my face. "Yes my dear." "Will you see me again?—do." I was
|
||
always careful about promising that, and hesitated; but at length said
|
||
yes. Again I rose to go, again the girl asked me to stay, it was so
|
||
warm. "Pay the woman again and say you are going to stay till ten
|
||
o'clock." There was such simplicity about her that I consented. The woman
|
||
put coals on the fire, and we sat by it warming ourselves.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After a time she said, "I don't think you like me." "Why?" "Because you
|
||
don't feel me about." I laughed, and said I had been feeling her. Time
|
||
ran on. "Won't you do it again?" "I can't dear." "Let me try to make you."
|
||
"You may, but I can't." She came to me, knelt down, played funnily,
|
||
but awkwardly with my cock till it stiffened, and again we fucked.
|
||
"You won't see me again, though you say you will." "Why not?" asked I
|
||
wondering at her sad manner. "They all say they will, but they never
|
||
do,—it's the small-pox marks they can't bear, I know it is,—I'm tired
|
||
of this life." Then suddenly she laughed and said she was only joking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I never did see her again. Such a young, white-fleshed girl, and so fond
|
||
of the cock, or else she had had but little of it, I have rarely met
|
||
with. She said she had only been out two months. "The other girls tell
|
||
me what to do with men, and the old woman where I live tells me; but I
|
||
always does what a gentleman asks me, I can't do more, can I?" said she.
|
||
"Other gals say they have regular friends, I haven't." I shall never
|
||
forget that poor little girl.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On a cold evening a week or two after this, I saw a shortish, dark-eyed
|
||
girl going along the Strand. She walked slowly, and looked in at almost
|
||
every shop. I could not make up my mind if she were gay or not. She was
|
||
warmly wrapped up, her style that of a well-to-do servant. I passed and
|
||
repassed her, looked her in the face; her eyes met mine and dropped,
|
||
then she stopped and looked round several times after unmistakeable
|
||
gay women as they passed her, then went on again. Opposite the Adelphi
|
||
she paused and looked at the theatre for a long time, a gentleman spoke
|
||
to her, and seemed to importune her, she took no notice of him, and he
|
||
left her. After walking on for a minute quickly she loitered and looked
|
||
in the shops again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Near Exeter Hall my cock which was in want of relief giving me
|
||
impudence, and liking her looks I spoke to her about the things in the
|
||
windows. At first I got no reply, and she walked on. "Come with me, and
|
||
I'll give you a sovereign." "You can buy it then." What it was I don't
|
||
recollect. She seemed uneasy and wavering, yet made no reply. I repeated
|
||
my offer (it was just then money beyond my means, but I had hot desire
|
||
on me). She looked up the street in both directions, and asked, "Will
|
||
it be far?" I took her at the instant for a sly gay one. "You know I am
|
||
sure, it's close bye." "It's getting late, I'm in a hurry." Looking both
|
||
ways quickly and uneasily she placed her arm in mine, and hanging her
|
||
head down pressed close to me. We walked quickly, and soon were in a
|
||
snug room in a house at the back of Exeter Hall.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"This is not a public-house", said she looking round. "No, but you can
|
||
have a drink if you like." "A little warm brandy and water then." I
|
||
ordered it. "Take off your bonnet and cloak." She hesitated. "Tell me
|
||
the exact time." I did, and then she took them off, sat down, and soon
|
||
sipped brandy and water looking at me. Thought I, "You must be a servant
|
||
after all."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I began to caress her, and got my hand on her thighs asking her to come
|
||
to the bed. "I must go soon, let me go soon." "I will, but let me see
|
||
your legs, and feel them." She let me pull the clothes up to her knees,
|
||
then pushed away my hand but I thrust one up, and just felt the cunt.
|
||
She gave me a shove, and nearly pushed me over, for I had dropped on to
|
||
my knees, a favorite attitude of mine at such times.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Savagely I got up. "Don't be a fool; if you mean to let me do it come
|
||
to the bed." She hesitated. "Give me the money first." "Oh!" thought
|
||
I, "she is a whore diseased, and a bilk," so I refused. "You really will
|
||
give it to me, won't you?" "Of course, but I'm not to be done that way."
|
||
Then I got her on to the bed, and threw up her clothes. She resisted.
|
||
"What do you take me for?" "Why a whore", said I savagely. It was a word
|
||
I rarely used <i>of</i> a woman, still rarer <i>to</i> a woman. She pushed my hand
|
||
angrily away and sat up.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I am not, and wish I had not come here, and would not, only I want
|
||
money for my poor mother, I thought you a gentleman,—I'm not the sort
|
||
of a woman you say, I'm a servant, I am indeed." "Well if you are, you
|
||
have been fucked." "That's neither here nor there, but I'm not what you
|
||
call me",—and she pouted. "Lay down dear,—let's fuck if you mean it,
|
||
if not let's go,—let me feel you, and you feel me." I pulled her back
|
||
on to the bed, laying down by the side of her, and put my prick into
|
||
her hand. It was persuasive, for soon I was having that delicious rub,
|
||
probe, and twiddle. Then I got a sight of all but the cunt itself, the
|
||
inspection of that she resisted. A fine pair of limbs, a fat backside,
|
||
lots of hair on her split I could feel. My friction told, she began
|
||
grasping my prick like a vise,—she was going to spend.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Nice to her that, but I wanted my pleasure. Again I got savage. At
|
||
length quietly, and feeling my prick all the time she said, "Promise me
|
||
something." "What?" "Don't you wet inside if I let you." I promised,
|
||
and turning on to her belly fucked her, and forgot my promise, even if
|
||
I ever meant to keep it. We were soon near the crisis.
|
||
"Don't—now,—oh!—wet."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"No dear." "T—aake—care." "I'll pull it out just as it comes dear."
|
||
"Don't—we—wet, oh!—ah!—wet", she gasped out as clutching her arse my
|
||
prick went fiercely up her, and spent every drop against her womb-tube,
|
||
my spend made doubly pleasurable, because she did not wish it in her
|
||
cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Said she with a long-drawn sigh, "You've done it all inside,—you should
|
||
not." "I could not help it, you are so charming, I could not pull it
|
||
out and make your clothes or bum wet", said I ramming on, and keeping my
|
||
prick tight up her lubricated cunt, "Let me get up." "Not yet." "Oh!
|
||
do, I'm in a hurry." "Lay still dear." "No, I'm in such a hurry,—what
|
||
o'clock is it?—do tell me what o'clock it is,—it will make me lose my
|
||
place if I'm very late."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I uncunted, told her the time, and she washed her cunt. "Let us do it
|
||
again." She was wanting it. "I've such a long way to go." "Where?" She
|
||
told me, and it was on my way home. "I will take you home in a cab." On
|
||
the bed she got, I overcame her scruples, kissed her knees, her thighs,
|
||
all the way up to her cunt. The thighs opened widely, a second's
|
||
inspection of a cunt at that time of my life made me think of immediate
|
||
pleasure, and after promising not to wet in her again, she reminding me
|
||
of that, till she lost all care or heed in her pleasures. I spent up her
|
||
as before.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We went home in a cab, and felt each other all the way, she said she
|
||
was keeping her mother who was poor, she feared dying. At the end of the
|
||
road she got out begging me not to follow her. I did not, and never saw
|
||
her again. She had hazel eyes, spoke with a country accent, and I quite
|
||
believe was a servant.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Although soon after this a little better off, I had difficulty in
|
||
keeping out of debt, and the cost of amatory amusements prevented my
|
||
having women as often as I otherwise should have done. I used to try the
|
||
cheap women at times, and often successfully. Would walk backwards and
|
||
forwards between Temple-Bar and Charing Cross for hours, looking at the
|
||
women, thinking which I should like, and whether I could afford one.
|
||
Sometimes I would follow the same woman, stop when she stopped if a man
|
||
spoke to her, cross over, and wait till she moved off by herself, or if
|
||
with the man, would follow them to a brothel, return to watch for her
|
||
coming out, and wait 'till she did so. This pleased me much.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I began to feel women in the streets; they frequently came out
|
||
of the E.. t. r Street-houses, and round by the side-entrance to
|
||
Exeter-Hall. That end of the street then was all but dark.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Stopping a woman. This was a frequent dialogue. "A nice night dear."
|
||
"Yes." "Been taking a walk?" "Yes." "Been to piddle?" "Yes." They
|
||
usually when I knew they had come out of a house, said they had been to
|
||
piddle if I asked them. "A shilling to feel your cunt." "All right, give
|
||
it me." With the left hand I gave the shilling with the right I fingered
|
||
their quims. "Open your legs dear,—a little wider,—let me feel
|
||
up,—have you been fucked to-night?" "No." It was always no. I delighted
|
||
in hearing them tell that lie. "Come with me." "How much?" "Give me a
|
||
sovereign." "No." "Ten shillings then." "I can't afford more than five
|
||
shillings." "No, not for that"; but they more often said yes. Sometimes
|
||
I went with them, more frequently not. The lesson I learned was that
|
||
most woman denied that they had fucked more recently than the day
|
||
before, (it was always the day before), and that a little bargaining
|
||
reduced the price of their pleasures.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
If intending to have a poke I waited for a girl known by sight, and then
|
||
often could not find her, then I saw those so dressed that I could not
|
||
offer them a small sum. On other nights I went up to the girl with the
|
||
fattest legs, and made advances. In this way I shagged many of all sorts
|
||
and sizes, many of them poor creatures, others plump, fine, strong,
|
||
healthy women, whom I was surprised took the small sum for their
|
||
professional exertions. The end of this promiscuity was that again I
|
||
took the clap, which laid me up some weeks, and made it again needful to
|
||
open my piss-pipe by surgical tubes.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I was timid, used French letters, and took to carrying them in my
|
||
purse again, but always hated them. Often my cock stiff as a boring-iron
|
||
would shrink directly the wet gut touched it, and compelled me to frig
|
||
up to near the crisis before I could insert it in the skin. Sometimes it
|
||
would not stiffen completely till up the women. I used to drop my tool
|
||
in a state of partial rigidity into the letter, then thumb it slowly up
|
||
the lady's orifice; then the warmth, the clip, the buttocks wagging, and
|
||
the look at the belly and thighs between which I was working brought
|
||
it to the proper stiffness. I usually had the ladies at the side of the
|
||
bed, when wearing these cundums.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Sometimes my passions overcame my prudence, and a fair lady for her
|
||
favors got her price. Then I was filled with regrets, and had to content
|
||
myself with a feel for some time, or wait days till I could afford the
|
||
full gratification of my senses with another woman, because I had not
|
||
the money. Then I fell again on my five shilling offers. About this
|
||
cunt-feeling there was something very peculiar in me: unless I liked the
|
||
look of the woman I did not like to feel up her cunt, and after I had
|
||
been groping used to spit on my fingers, and rub them dry, and the smell
|
||
off of them on to my handkerchief.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Some little time after my clap however I came into a better income
|
||
through the death of a relative. It was small, but made a difference
|
||
to me of great importance. I spent it all on myself, that is to say on
|
||
cunt, and although some of my country relatives must have known I had
|
||
come into the property, those most interested in knowing it I believe
|
||
never did. I now longed for nice women whom I could talk and spend the
|
||
money with. The rapid business-like fucking in the baudy houses was
|
||
not to my taste, I had scarcely gone to the Argyle Rooms, then not many
|
||
years opened, for fear that my taste for nicety of manner and something
|
||
more than mere cunt might lead me into an expenditure still far beyond
|
||
my means.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It used to wound my pride to hear a woman jeer at my offer, or say,
|
||
"What the devil do you take me for", or walk away wagging her rump with
|
||
offended dignity when she heard five shillings named, or say she would
|
||
frig me for the money. Now I could offer more I was more happy in my
|
||
mind; but there are a few adventures to be told before the time when an
|
||
easier pocket enabled me to have better female companions.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The angle of the street named as leading out of the Strand was dark of
|
||
a night and a favorite place for doxies to go to relieve their bladders.
|
||
The police took no notice of such trifles, provided it was not done in
|
||
the greater thoroughfares (although I have seen at night women do it
|
||
openly in the gutters in the Strand), in the particular street I have
|
||
seen them pissing almost in rows, yet they mostly went in twos to do
|
||
that job, for a woman likes a screen, one usually standing up till the
|
||
other has finished, and then taking her turn. Indeed the pissing in all
|
||
bye-streets of the Strand was continuous, for although the population
|
||
of London was only half what it now is, the number of gay ladies seemed
|
||
double there. The theatre-side of the street from Trafalgar-Square to
|
||
Temple-Bar was nightly for some hours one large flock of them, and there
|
||
was not a street or court on the whole line named, and on both sides of
|
||
the Strand in which there was not a baudy house. I have been in a dozen.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I used to prowl about to see the girls pissing, and when I had cheek
|
||
enough, stand and piss by the side of them. That delighted me much.
|
||
One night I saw two women go up a court, one directly squatted, and I
|
||
followed. When one had done I asked her to let me feel her. She did.
|
||
Randy but poor that night the feel of her wet cunt made me reckless. As
|
||
I gave her a shilling I remarked how I should like to have her, but that
|
||
I had but five shillings to give.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You won't have me for five shillings, but you will get some one who
|
||
will,—you have lots of cheek to offer it." "I am sorry, but I can't
|
||
help it if I have not more." Had I not ten shillings? No, only enough
|
||
for the room. All this time I was feeling her. Then her hand went
|
||
outside my trowsers, feeling at my cock. I slipped it out, she took it
|
||
in her hand. "Have you not been a long time in the Strand to-night?"
|
||
said she. I had, and wanted a woman, only I had so little money. I did
|
||
not know the form or face of this woman, for we were in the darkest
|
||
place, and the night was dark and cold, but I felt that she had a silk
|
||
dress on, lots of hair on her cunt, and a large arse. "You may do it
|
||
here for five shillings", said she. I had never done it in the open in
|
||
such a place, but consented. Groping in my pocket I found and gave the
|
||
money, and then she stepped away from me,—a bilk I thought.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was not so. She went up to the other woman who was standing at the
|
||
corner, and telling her to look out for the police, came back to me,
|
||
and again placing her back up against the wall, I fucked her. "Wasn't it
|
||
nice!" said she dropping her petticoats. And then we stood and talked.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Stand a drink", said she, "you've got some silver." I did not mind, and
|
||
was curious to see her. She called her friend, and all three went to a
|
||
public-house, the lady with all my emission in her cunt. I found she was
|
||
a full-grown woman of about thirty with dark hair, dark eyes, and with
|
||
a bold expression in them. We had mulled port-wine, then something else,
|
||
and stood drinking till all my money was gone. Her companion left us
|
||
saying she had not gained a farthing that night, and must do so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
My woman then got pleasanter, and wanted more liquor, my money was gone,
|
||
but I had a pencil-case, and asked the bar-man if he would lend me a few
|
||
shillings on it. He did, and I then spent more on liquor, then we went
|
||
out together again into the cold street; she pissed, saying the cold and
|
||
the liquor had made her leaky. "I wish you would let me again", said I.
|
||
Well she would, and up against a wall again we fucked heartily. With my
|
||
spunk in her we walked together into the Strand. She said she would like
|
||
to see me again, but I never did. Whilst fucking her the second time she
|
||
shoved her tongue almost down my throat, and breathed so hard. I never
|
||
fucked a woman in the street who did so, either before or since. A few
|
||
nights after I got my pencil-case back from the beer-man.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night a nice, strong-built woman about thirty years of age
|
||
seemingly, took my five shillings, and went to a house with me. She was
|
||
dressed in black silk, neat but shabby. She sat down on a chair, and
|
||
pulling up her clothes rearranged both her garters, showing what I
|
||
expected, and what I had engaged her for; a pair of fat legs. Then down
|
||
went her clothes. I began feeling her, she pushed her bum back on
|
||
the chair, but her thighs and the hairy ornaments I could feel. I
|
||
was awfully randy, my prick was raging. "Let's feel <i>you</i>", said she.
|
||
Willingly I let her grasp it, then she moved her arse forward, and I had
|
||
the pleasure of just feeling a moist clitoris from which I was diverted
|
||
by a painful squeeze she gave my prick. She was squeezing no doubt to
|
||
see if I had any ailment. The effect of the squeeze, which made me call
|
||
out, was to make me mad with randiness. "Take off your things, and let
|
||
me do it." "Where is the five shillings?" I placed them in her hands,
|
||
she pocketed them, and got up. Lifting her petticoats I pressed her
|
||
towards the bed where she was standing when she had spoken, but she
|
||
pushed down her petticoats, and moved away.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Not likely I'm going to take off my things for five shillings",
|
||
said she as the money slipped down into her pocket, "give me fifteen
|
||
shillings more, and I will,—I'm a fine-built woman",—and she pulled
|
||
her clothes clean up to her waist, turned round like a tetotum, and
|
||
after showing both arse and belly, slow-ly dropped her clothes again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Come to the side of the bed." "No I shan't, you've had a feel for five
|
||
shillings, give me fifteen shillings more, and I'll give you pleasure I
|
||
know,—I'll do all you want me."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I can't." "Then I can't." I had not a pound in my pocket, but if I had,
|
||
am sure indeed I should have given it to her, but I could not. "Give me
|
||
ten shillings, and I'll pay for the room then", said she. "I didn't know
|
||
what house I was at, but generally they asked at those places the price
|
||
of the room first.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Just as you like", though I was dying for a fuck. "Then I will go." "I
|
||
have paid you,—if you choose to bilk me I can't help it." "I don't want
|
||
to bilk you, but I never let a man have me for five shillings, and I
|
||
never will,—give me five shillings more."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Let me feel you, if you won't let me poke you." "You may do that."
|
||
Leaning her bum against the side of the bed, I began groping; she
|
||
complaisantly moving one leg up on to a chair, so as to open her thighs
|
||
well, got hold of my prick, and began frigging it. "Give me another
|
||
five shillings", said she coaxingly, and under the influence of the
|
||
masturbating process I gave it to her. She gave my penis the most
|
||
delicate titillation whilst I was searching in my pocket for the money,
|
||
but she would not let me after she had got the five shillings. She went
|
||
on frigging me, repeating that she never let any one have her unless she
|
||
had a pound given her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was annoyed, and hated frigging. Here was a well-formed woman, a cunt
|
||
at hand, and yet I was to spunk out on to the floor, was being made a
|
||
fool of. Stopping I said, "You don't mean to let me, whatever I give
|
||
you." "Yes I do, for a sovereign." "Frig me then." She took my tool in
|
||
her hand, and frigged. "Let me spend against your cunt." "No." "Against
|
||
your thighs." "No." "Oh!—ah!" Finding it was coming she left off.
|
||
"Give me five shillings, and I will", said she, but I would not, began
|
||
frigging myself, and spite of her pushed one hand up on to her thighs,
|
||
and frigged away with the other. "Take care of my dress", said she. The
|
||
savage delight of doing what she wished me not, came over me. Turning
|
||
my prick I shot my sperm copiously over her silk dress, and finished
|
||
by flinging from my fingers what remained of it towards her face.
|
||
"You damned dirty beast, you did it on purpose." "Serve you right, you
|
||
cheating whore", said I putting on my hat, and leaving her with a towel
|
||
wiping off my sperm, and cursing me as she did it. I don't know when I
|
||
felt so spiteful against a woman as I did against her. My discharge was
|
||
quick and copious, I saw it on her waist downwards. I have been bilked
|
||
before and since, but have mostly pardoned the woman, for sometimes I
|
||
have thought the poor things had their courses on, or some ailment or
|
||
deformity; but I still seem to hate this one.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I may add that at the time these doings took place there were but three
|
||
theatres in the Strand.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0002"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER II.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Preliminary remarks.—A dress-lodger.—Lucy.—Sweet
|
||
seventeen.—An impudent demand.—A row.—The bawd.—My watch
|
||
requisitioned.—Exit barred.—Bill.—Funking.—
|
||
Determination.—The poker and window.—Vici.—Apologies.—A
|
||
cautious retreat.—My revenge.—Lucy scared away.—Brighton
|
||
Bessie.—Washing by fire-light.—Friendly intimacy.—The
|
||
house in B.w Street.—Lascivious evenings.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I have read through the two volumes in print. There are typographical
|
||
errors, the names of women and places are once or twice wrongly given
|
||
or spelt, but the context corrects that, and it matters not. What is
|
||
important is; that owing to the brevity with which some occurrences are
|
||
told, they almost seem improbable; this is the result of not printing my
|
||
narrative all through exactly as I wrote it. In the manuscript, items of
|
||
conversation, and numerous details of the behaviour of myself and female
|
||
partners in my amours, were written down just as they occurred, and
|
||
showed how the climax was reached; how little by little man and woman
|
||
inclined to each other, how one pressed, and the other yielded, how from
|
||
modest talk and chaste kisses our chastity gradually was lost, how by
|
||
touch and sighs and yielding to the swooning lust which coursed stronger
|
||
and stronger through our veins, our genitals inflamed, swollen, and
|
||
sweating, drove us to contact with each other, till the carnal coupling
|
||
ensued, and prick and cunt revelling and wallowing in each other's
|
||
juices, drowned both wants and senses in voluptuous oblivion.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
These details also gave studies of character, and specially of my own
|
||
character, and as I now read the narratives in print after the lapse of
|
||
so many years they seem to me to be needed to explain myself, even to
|
||
myself. It is too late. The manuscript is burnt, that printed in its
|
||
stead must be taken as truth or not, as scepticism or faith prevails in
|
||
the reader, if ever there be one but myself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Nor can I less abbreviate even now and in the future I fear, for the
|
||
full narrative would entail too much expense in printing, and prolong
|
||
the time of completion. Yet what pleasure I had in the wordy veracities
|
||
as I wrote them, childish, fantastic, ludicrous, as some of the doings
|
||
and sayings now seem! How unlike the doings of the couples in erotic
|
||
books which I since have read, books written with no other object but to
|
||
stimulate the passions,—no object that of mine in writing this.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The narratives were written in the present tense, but in print have been
|
||
altered to the past, which gives them an air of a studied composition,
|
||
written as a man might write a novel; but the writing extended over well
|
||
nigh forty years, and barely a word has been altered, excepting those
|
||
due to omissions.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
There are however a few remarks added here and there to explain the
|
||
circumstances and connect the incidents; these are needful to explain
|
||
lapses of time, and to show the continuity of the history, for all the
|
||
amours were written separately; yet often I had two or three women in
|
||
hand at the same period. So in arranging them chronologically a few
|
||
additions and observations were needful to explain, and these are of
|
||
them.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One muddy night in the Strand there was an exceedingly well-dressed and
|
||
very short-petticoated (they all wore them then) girl of about seventeen
|
||
years of age; her legs especially pleased me, they were so plump and
|
||
neat, and her feet so well shod. After my offer had been accepted,
|
||
we went to a house in a court just by Drury-Lane Theatre, and to a
|
||
top-floor front-room very handsomely furnished. She lived there, and
|
||
was a dress-lodger as I found afterwards. She was beautifully clean,
|
||
had fine linen, and was no sham in any way; a fresh, strong, plump,
|
||
well-made young girl with lovely firm breasts, and a small quantity of
|
||
brown hair on her cunt. Cunt and breasts looked only seventeen years,
|
||
backside, thighs, arms, calves looked twenty. She stripped, and with but
|
||
one feel and a stretch of her pretty cunt-lips, and a moment's glance I
|
||
plugged her, and recollect now my enjoyment of her. Then I dressed,
|
||
and so did she. Though so young, she was a well trained whore, had much
|
||
pleased me by her freedom in manner, even to the way in which she washed
|
||
her cunt and pissed after her fuck. I was not with her I should say
|
||
twenty minutes if so long; my lust for her had been so strong.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What's this?" said she disdainfully as I gave her half-a-sovereign.
|
||
"What I promised you." "Oh! no you did not, I expect five pounds." I
|
||
expostulated. "Look at this room, look at my dress,—do you expect me to
|
||
let a man come here with me for ten shillings?" "Its all I promised, had
|
||
you refused I should not have come with you." Then I put on my hat, and
|
||
moved towards the door; she placed her back against it. "You don't go
|
||
out of here till you give me three sovereigns." It must be added that I
|
||
had paid for the room what appeared to me then a large sum.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was in for a row, had not as much as two pounds about me, and was
|
||
fearful of exposure, just then a row in a baudy house would have injured
|
||
me if known.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I gave her ten shillings more, she took it, but refused to let me go,
|
||
she did not believe I had so little money,—I was a gentleman, let me
|
||
behave as such,—no I should not go till I gave her what she asked. I
|
||
tried to pull her from the door, but could not, then sat down on the
|
||
chair, saying that if I must wait, why so I must.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She tried coaxing, I told her I was entitled to another fuck for
|
||
my other ten shillings. Well I might if I gave her another twenty
|
||
shillings. I put hands up her petticoats, and fingers up her quim,
|
||
thinking she was giving way,—but no. I had forgotten my fears in my
|
||
randiness which came on again by fumbling about her rump and cunt, and
|
||
pulled out my prick stiff again. She bent over me, and gave it two or
|
||
three frigs. That so excited me, that verily I believe I should have
|
||
given her the money if I had had it, for the pleasure of having her
|
||
again; but putting my hand into my trows-ers, found silver only to
|
||
something like a pound in value, and told her that. Then losing her
|
||
gentility she said, "I'm damned if you do go, you bugger, till you have
|
||
paid me properly."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Fear of exposure came over me, but I hid it, and sitting down looked at
|
||
her as she stood against the door in her petticoats, her handsome limbs
|
||
showing bright in their silks, and her plump breasts just squeezing the
|
||
bubbies over the top of the stays. Laying hold of my tool I pulled it
|
||
out. "Stand there as long as you like, you look lovely,—as you won't
|
||
let me fuck you, I'll frig myself." Suiting the action to the word I
|
||
began fist-fucking, not meaning however to finish so. It was but chaff,
|
||
for indeed I was funky.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She stood looking till I said, "I'm coming,—I'm spending,—lift up
|
||
your petticoats, and let me see your cunt." Then unlocking the door and
|
||
opening it quickly she bawled out, "Mrs. Smith, Mrs. Smith, come up,
|
||
here's a bilk, come up quickly."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was now near spending as may be guessed, but buttoning up, went
|
||
towards the door. She heard me, turned round, came in, shut the door,
|
||
and stood with her back to it till a woman came in; and then she told
|
||
her I had given her ten shillings.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The woman was incensed, was I a gent? she was sure I was, why not pay
|
||
properly then?—a beautiful young girl like that,—just out,—look at
|
||
her shape, and her face,—she had written to a dozen gents who knew her
|
||
house, and they had all come to see this beauty,—all had given her five
|
||
pounds, some ten pounds, they were so delighted with her,—and much of
|
||
the same talk. The girl began to whimper, saying she never had been so
|
||
insulted in her life before.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I told her that I had only promised ten shillings, but had given more;
|
||
that the girl was certainly beautiful, and the room elegant; but I was
|
||
poor, and would not have come at all had I known the cost. I had not the
|
||
money, and therefore could not pay. Then the bawd's tone changed. She
|
||
was not going to have the poor girl insulted in that manner, she knew
|
||
better about my means of paying, and I should not go till I paid more.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We went on wrangling until the bawd said, "Well if you have not money
|
||
give us your watch and chain, we will pawn it, and give you the ticket,
|
||
and you can get it out of pawn."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had hidden my watch,—nearly always did so then when I went with
|
||
whores whom I did not know,—but saw in this a threat, and was getting
|
||
more funky, yet determined to resist whatever came of it; so said I had
|
||
no watch, and if I had, that I would see her damned first, before I gave
|
||
it up. "Oh! won't you", said she, "we will see if you won't,—we don't
|
||
allow a poor girl to be robbed by chaps like you in our house,—call up
|
||
Bill", said she to the girl. I saw that a bully was about to be let on
|
||
me, and my heart beat hard and fast; but give up my watch I made up my
|
||
mind I would not unless they murdered me. I had an undefined suspicion
|
||
that they would illtreat and rob me, and prepared for the worst,—my
|
||
pluck got up then.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But fear of exposure was before me. "Look", said I, "I have no watch,
|
||
I have given her twenty shillings, here is every farthing I have about
|
||
me", and emptied my purse (there was but a shilling or two in it)
|
||
before them, and put all the money I had loose in my pocket on to the
|
||
chimney-piece. There was I think about seventeen shillings in all.
|
||
"Look it is every farthing I have,—you may have that you damned
|
||
thieves,—take it and let me go,—see my pockets are empty",—and I
|
||
turned them inside out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You've got more", said she, "be a gent, give her three pounds, she
|
||
never has less,—look at her, poor thing!" The girl stood whimpering,
|
||
she and the woman stood with their backs to the door, I with my back to
|
||
the two windows of the room which looked out on to the public court; the
|
||
fire-place was between us, the foot of the bed towards it; the fire was
|
||
burning brightly, the room was quite light. There they stood, the
|
||
clean, fresh, wholesome-looking lass, and besides her a shortish, thick,
|
||
hooked-nosed, tawney-colored, evil-looking woman,—the bawd,—she looked
|
||
like a bilious Jewess.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The woman kept repeating this, for a minute or two. I refused to give
|
||
any more, and grew collected. "Come now, what are you going to do?" said
|
||
the woman, "you are wasting all her evening." I took up half-a-crown
|
||
off the mantle-shelf, and pushing the rest along it, "I must keep this",
|
||
said I, "but take all the rest, I have no more,—I have no watch,—let
|
||
me go." The woman laughed sneeringly, and did not touch the money,
|
||
turned round, opened the door, and called out "Bill, Bill, come up."
|
||
"Halloh!" said a loud male voice from below.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I turned round, and with a violent pull, tore aside the red
|
||
window-curtains, and throwing up the window, and putting my head
|
||
out beneath the white blind, I screamed out,
|
||
"Police!—police!—murder!—murder!—police!—police!"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Beneath the very window stalked a policeman; heard me he must, the whole
|
||
alley must have heard me, but the policeman took no notice, and stalking
|
||
on turned round the corner out of sight. Then the fear came over me
|
||
that he was bribed, I feared they might be coming behind me, and turned
|
||
round; the woman was close to me, the girl at her back. "What are you
|
||
doing?" yelled the woman, "what are you kicking up a row for?—shut
|
||
the window,—go if you want, who is keeping you?—this is a respectable
|
||
house, this is."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A tumult of ideas and fears rushed through my mind, I feared Bill was
|
||
close at hand, and pushing the woman back with one hand I seized the
|
||
poker with the right one. "Keep back, or I will smash you", said I
|
||
flourishing it, and again I shouted out, "Police!—police!" but not
|
||
with my head out of the window this time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The old woman backed and shut the door again, the young one came
|
||
forwards speaking in a hurried tone, the old one dropped her voice to
|
||
a whine; she did not want to keep me if I wanted to go. "Shut the
|
||
window,—let her shut it,—give the poor girl two pounds then, and go."
|
||
Her house was a respectable house, the police knew it, why did I come to
|
||
such a house if I had no money? The girl cried, I blustered, swore, and
|
||
all three were speaking at the same time for two or three minutes.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Let me go." "Who stops you?" said the old woman, "give me the money."
|
||
"Open the door, and go out first then." "I shan't", said the woman with
|
||
a snap and a look like a demon. I turned round, and with the poker made
|
||
a smash at the window. The curtains had swung, the white blind was down,
|
||
but I heard the glass shiver and crash, a shout of "Hulloh!" from some
|
||
one in the court. I raised the poker again against the looking-glass.
|
||
"Get out, or I'll smash this, and you, and everything else in the room",
|
||
striking a chair violently, and breaking it. I now did not care what
|
||
I did, but was determined to fight Bill, or any one else, and not be
|
||
robbed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The women were cowed, they cried out, Pray drop the poker,—they
|
||
meant no harm,—the girl always had three pounds at least,—if I would
|
||
not,—why I would not,—they never have had such a row in the house
|
||
before,—to have her twice, and give her ten shillings was shameful. "A
|
||
lie you bloody bawd, I have only had her once, and she has had twenty
|
||
shillings." "Well, there's a good gentleman, go, and don't make a noise
|
||
as you go downstairs,—look at her, poor thing, how you have frightened
|
||
her,—she will let you have her again, if you like,—won't you
|
||
Lucy?"—"well come along then, but don't make a row,—leave the poker,
|
||
—what do you want that for?" whined the woman. I would not relinquish
|
||
the poker, they should go out first. The woman went, the girl waited
|
||
behind to put on her frock. As she did so the little bitch lifted her
|
||
petticoats to her thighs, showed her cunt, jerked her belly, winked and
|
||
nodded her head in the direction of the old woman. I did not know nor
|
||
heed what she meant by her nod and wink. "Get out,—get on,—get out,—I
|
||
won't have you behind me." She made a farting noise with her mouth, and
|
||
dropping her clothes went out. I followed her, looked at the doors on
|
||
each landing as I passed, fearing some one might come out behind me, and
|
||
edged downstairs sideways, looking both up and down. One door slightly
|
||
opened and closed again; at the street-door the old woman said she was
|
||
so sorry, it was all a mistake, and hoped to see me again. My blood
|
||
was roused, I would have smashed woman or man who stood in my way, and
|
||
eyeing the girl said, "Look at me well, if you meet me in the Strand
|
||
again, cut away at once, get out of my sight, or I'll give you in
|
||
charge for annoying me, or robbing me, you bloody bitch, look out for
|
||
yourself." Then dropping the poker on the mat I went out, glad enough to
|
||
be away from the den.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
About a fortnight afterwards I saw the girl in the Strand, followed her
|
||
for a quarter of an hour, saw her speak to various men, saw that an old,
|
||
common, low servant followed her at a distance, occasionally stopping
|
||
to speak with her, and turning up a street for that purpose. There was
|
||
a fascination about looking at the girl; she was showily but handsomely
|
||
dressed, her legs looked lovely. I longed to fuck her again, but without
|
||
any intention of gratifying my lust, for I loathed her whilst lusting
|
||
for her. She turned up C. t...e Street, stood over the gutter and pissed
|
||
standing, the old woman talking to her and partly hiding her whilst
|
||
she emptied her bladder. I waited till she had done. It was only about
|
||
half-past nine o'clock.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She came towards me thinking I wanted her. I moved back close to a lamp,
|
||
and raised my hat. "Look at me you damned whore, you attempted to rob me
|
||
the other night, go out of the Strand, or I'll tell the next policeman
|
||
you have picked my pocket." She turned on her heels and bolted without
|
||
uttering a word, the old woman after her, cursing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A month or two afterwards I saw her again, she was speaking to a group
|
||
of gay women. Said I, "That bitch attempted to rob me the other night at
|
||
——— Court." "It's a lie", said she, but again turned round, and ran
|
||
up a side-street as fast as she could. I don't recollect seeing her
|
||
afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I often used to go and look at the house when that way, it was such a
|
||
needy-looking house outside with a narrow steep staircase starting close
|
||
to the street-door. No one would have imagined it was so handsomely
|
||
furnished inside (although I only saw the top-room). Two or three years
|
||
afterwards there was a row there, a man tumbled down the stairs (or
|
||
was pitched down), and was picked up dead. The owner of the house was
|
||
transported. I don't know if it was the same man who was called Bill,
|
||
but suspect it was, and that many a visitor had been bullied out of his
|
||
money in that house.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night about this time I saw a well-grown, stout woman who looked
|
||
four-and-twenty. "What a thigh she must have," thought I, "can I afford
|
||
her?" and I felt in my pocket. Ten shillings with the room besides was
|
||
too much for me that night. I passed her again looking her in the face,
|
||
and longing for her, until she knew me and smiled. She had a bright
|
||
laughing eye. Summoning courage I gave her a signal, and she followed me
|
||
up a bye-street.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I have only five shillings." "Lord! you do want it cheap,—make it ten
|
||
shillings." "I can't." "Well <i>I</i> can't." "Three half-crowns, and then
|
||
with the room I shan't have a shilling in my pocket." I used to speak in
|
||
that frank way to them. She laughed. "You are an odd sort of chap,—well
|
||
come along,—what house are you going to take me to?" "Where you
|
||
like,—I don't know them." "Oh! yes you do," said she, "you know well
|
||
enough with that eye of yours." We turned into a house which we both
|
||
knew, not one of the most expensive.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was exceedingly pleased with her manner, and in her house still more
|
||
pleased with her face. Her eye was one of the merriest, she was bright,
|
||
and fresh-colored, yet the general color of her flesh was slightly
|
||
brown. Her plumpness made me so randy I could scarcely wait to feel or
|
||
look at her, I wanted to push on to the fullest pleasures at once.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She eyed me pleasantly, and made some remark about the smallness of the
|
||
sum, which made me uncomfortable. She saw it, and laughing showed a set
|
||
of beautiful small white teeth. I gave her her money at once, and
|
||
then began preliminaries. The room I recollect well. There was a
|
||
large four-post bed, a large wire screen three feet high all round the
|
||
fire-place, like those in nurseries. The house-woman flattened the fire
|
||
down, and took away the poker,—to prevent the fire being stirred I
|
||
suppose. There was but one candle, and the room was dark, there was
|
||
scarcely gas in any of the houses in those days.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I drew her to me, my hand roved about her bum, belly, and notch, I asked
|
||
her to undress, desire increasing by the feel of her thighs made me
|
||
inquisitive. She would not undress, was in a hurry, some other night
|
||
perhaps, not now. Impatient so that I might begin, I placed her on the
|
||
edge of the bed, putting a chair for one of her feet. She lifted up her
|
||
clothes freely, and I saw her cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was surrounded, though not in great quantity, with fine chestnut
|
||
brown, soft, thick hair, her thighs were large, round, fat, and firm,
|
||
the split looked small, was small outside, and I found it to be small
|
||
inside as well. A large bum squeezed together by the position in which
|
||
she was lying closed up almost the cuntal opening, so that just where
|
||
the prick must intrude itself, the hole could scarcely be seen, her
|
||
flesh had the slightly brown tint of her face. How is it that at a
|
||
glance all this was seen, and remembered ever since? What fascination a
|
||
cunt has! Strange that a mere gap close to an arse-hole should have such
|
||
power.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
In admiration of her cunt and its surroundings I held a candle for a
|
||
moment between her thighs. "Hold your quim open,—do,—do." Her hand
|
||
came down, the fore and middle-finger went on either side of the split,
|
||
and distended the lips, showed the red lining, a clitoris, small, and
|
||
nice-looking, and small nymphae sloping down to the narrow carmine
|
||
darkness, closing up gradually and tightly between her bum-cheeks,
|
||
squeezed up and closed by the weight of her body pressing up her bum the
|
||
bed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I can bear being looked at", said she. "Then open your legs
|
||
wider,—wider dear." Wider they went. Candle in one hand I pushed the
|
||
finger of the other up her cunt. Then all delight of the eye was merged
|
||
in the maddening desire to fuck. Putting the candle somewhere it fell
|
||
down, and was extinguished; at the same moment slipping my prick to the
|
||
opening, with a smooth glide up it went. Before I had moved my prick
|
||
half a minute I was spending, before I had had a wriggle in her, before
|
||
I had well clasped her buttocks, I was leaning over her sighing, and had
|
||
finished before I had well began. I now think I feel my sensation up
|
||
her as I write this, of the rapturous smoothing of her buttocks as I
|
||
finished. Some women make me recollect them thus.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What a bore", said I squeezing my belly close up to hers, "I hate to be
|
||
quick." I heard her laugh, but could not see her face. She did not hurry
|
||
me out of her, but at length nature caused me to withdraw, and we got
|
||
the candle lighted.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Washing herself whilst I stood talking and regretting my haste, holding
|
||
my unwashed prick in front of her, she laughing and saying I must take
|
||
my time another day, emptied the basin, and turning round asked if she
|
||
should wash me. Years had elapsed I think since a woman had done so to
|
||
me, then it was by a French woman. The offer comes to me now as having
|
||
been an unusual one. Delighted I let her. Delicately handling my doodle
|
||
she soaped and washed it, making complimentary remarks about it as she
|
||
did so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The operation excited me, I stiffened. "Oh! I do so want you again,—let
|
||
me." "No its late,—if I don't make money before twelve I never do
|
||
afterwards,—see me another night,—besides you can't do it again yet."
|
||
"Let me feel you then only for a minute." She approached me, one hand I
|
||
put to her cunt, the other thrusting between her fat bum-cheeks met the
|
||
tip of the fingers on the other hand. "My prick's standing so." "It's
|
||
not." "Feel it." She put her hand down and felt, I stiff to the utmost
|
||
kept asking her to let me again. "Well get on the bed then", said she
|
||
after feeling me quietly for a minute,—"see the candle has burnt down,
|
||
it won't last long." By the time she had said this she was lying down
|
||
with her clothes up above her navel.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We were fucking with intensity, the candle went out, I felt her kisses.
|
||
"Oh! what a lovely cunt you have." "You've a nice prick,—who taught
|
||
you to poke so nicely?" Our tongues met,—silence, sighs, short shoves,
|
||
spunk,—and all was over. "Let me wash your cunt." "Very well." "You
|
||
wash my prick." "Yes." The mutual washing over we separated, I promising
|
||
to see her again. We had washed by the fire-light alone.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Next night at the same time we fucked again. I stripped her, and was
|
||
enamoured of her body if not of herself. She made no sign of wanting
|
||
to leave me, but rather wanted to keep me. I had not since I lost Mary
|
||
tasted a woman's mouth, with this woman I was delighted in doing so,
|
||
though with the ordinary gay women I could not bear their tongues.
|
||
Whilst we were fucking they knocked at the door saying they wanted the
|
||
room. Bessie swore, "Damn her", said she, "for interrupting us,—and
|
||
the money I have brought her." This increased my pleasure, and Bessie
|
||
participated in it. After fucking her twice we sat by the fire and
|
||
talked, she warming her bum, her petticoats up to her knees, my hand on
|
||
her quim, and airing my balls. "If you want me another night, and can't
|
||
see me, ask the woman about,—ask for Brighton Bessie,—there are two
|
||
Bessies, so mind,—Brighton Bessie", said she as we parted.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I found I could talk to this woman. Whilst doing so she would sit on my
|
||
knees and feel my prick, and I feel her privates. I had long wanted
|
||
such a free-and-easy acquaintance, for nothing annoyed me like the sham
|
||
modesty of doxies, their shuffling out of showing me their cunts, their
|
||
hurry to get me up them, and away afterwards. Bessie had none of this.
|
||
Like Camille, Mary, and all women I ever kept to long, she let me do
|
||
absolutely as I pleased, and without hurry would copulate, then sit and
|
||
talk till we were ready again
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
for the exercise. But they did not at the house in———
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Street fancy our staying so long at their busy time; so she arranged to
|
||
meet me at B. w Street one night, and took me to a house there which was
|
||
dearer, but where she said they rarely interrupted couples.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was nearly opposite to the Opera-House, since built. It had a very
|
||
large frontage, six or seven windows of a row I think, a dingy-looking
|
||
building that most people would have passed without noticing, or would
|
||
have thought it a dwelling-house of poorish people. The knowing ones
|
||
would have guessed that it meant something hidden and convenient. There
|
||
was no light outside, but if you pushed the door by night or by day, it
|
||
opened into a darkish lobby, then passing through a glass door with a
|
||
glimmer of light at the back, a woman met you, and conducted you to
|
||
a chamber, big or small, handsomely or poorly furnished according to
|
||
price. In it there must have been twenty rooms, and there was more
|
||
bum-wagging, more seed spent, more sighs of pleasure in that house
|
||
nightly, than in any other house in London I should think.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was dearer; but if you stayed for hours no one ever interrupted you.
|
||
There were in Winter good large fires, the rooms were a good size, there
|
||
was no gas, two candles were given, if you wanted more you paid extra.
|
||
Wine and liquor of fair quality was got for you. The furniture was
|
||
somewhat dingy, but all the rooms had sofas on which two could lie, and
|
||
beds large enough for three with clean linen always. It was one of the
|
||
most quiet, comfortable accommodation-shops I ever was in, and with
|
||
Brighton Bessie, I passed there many voluptuous evenings.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I took a bottle of champagne with me there one night, the first time I
|
||
ever did so to a baudy house when I met a gay woman; but I wanted that
|
||
night a long, quiet evening with a free woman, and had one with her
|
||
quite after my own fashion.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had Bessie often for about two years, and at intervals for two or
|
||
three years after that, the last was about ten years after I had first
|
||
met her. I never had a passion for her, nor did I keep only to her; but
|
||
through the Winter of this year, as nearly as I can recollect, I had few
|
||
but her. After next hot weather my lust ran riot, I got also better
|
||
off, and treated my pego to variety, but we then frequently met at B.w
|
||
Street. Poor Bessie fell in love with me, and was fond of liquor as I
|
||
shall tell, now will only tell of the way our evenings, and at times
|
||
afternoons were passed together.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
If warm enough we used to strip, and lay outside the bed; if not got
|
||
into bed. As she was beautifully shaped I first took my delight in
|
||
contemplating her, then I laid along the bed, my head near her knees,
|
||
she the reverse way, and again I inspected. Sometimes she twiddled my
|
||
cock, and I her clitoris, but generally the time was spent in putting
|
||
her in every voluptuous posture, and fucking in all sorts of positions.
|
||
She liked it. "It's all my eye", she used to remark when we talked on
|
||
the subject saying, "I don't like it,—I like fucking and baudiness,
|
||
it's the best thing in life,—a short life and lots of fucking is my
|
||
motto,—women who say they never spend with men are liars,—they all
|
||
like it as much as I do." She was but twenty-one years old, although her
|
||
stoutness made her look older. And now I leave her for a time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0003"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER III.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
A change in taste.—A small cunt longed for.—Hunting in the
|
||
Strand.—Yellow-haired Kitty.—Her little companion.—Oh!
|
||
you foule.—The house in E...t.r Street.—Double fees.—
|
||
Kitty's pleasure.—Objections to washing.—Have the other
|
||
gal.—Cleanliness.—Home occupations.—I ain't gay.—Kitty's
|
||
males.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I don't know why my erotic fancies took the desire for a young lass,
|
||
but they did. My taste had for the most part run upon the big, fleshy,
|
||
fat-cunted, and large-arsed; now perhaps for contrast, perhaps from
|
||
sheer curiosity, the letch took possession of me. A small cunt, tight
|
||
and hairless perhaps,—I wondered how it looked, felt, and if pleasure
|
||
would be increased by it, and though my prick swelled when spending
|
||
until I have groaned under the grip, even of a large cunt, I longed for
|
||
quite a little one. I had never had a very young girl,—excepting the
|
||
little child,—Nelly and Sophy had both a little hair on their mottes,
|
||
so I would try for a youthful quim and one if possible with no hair on
|
||
it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was not versed in the walks and ways of little ones, and looking about
|
||
at night saw none. Talking about it at my Club, I heard they were to be
|
||
seen mostly in the day-time, so I looked out in the Strand for what I
|
||
wanted, and during day-light.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On a blazing hot afternoon in June I walked about a long time thinking
|
||
of youthful harlots, but saw none, or if I did could not distinguish
|
||
them. At length I saw two young girls idling about, looking in at the
|
||
shop windows on the other side of the way. One was dressed all in black,
|
||
and was taller and stouter than the other. They were not got up in any
|
||
showy way, but looked like the children of decent mechanics.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They took no notice of any one, nor any one of them, they stopped at a
|
||
shop, and I noticed that the biggest had the largest legs. A plump form
|
||
had as said attractions to me almost superior to face. Crossing to the
|
||
other side of the way I passed them, looking them full in the face.
|
||
The taller one was good-looking, white-faced, and had goldenish hair,
|
||
a colour I could not bear. They looked at me, but there was nothing to
|
||
indicate fastness. Returning I met them again, the same stare, the same
|
||
indifference. Thinking of their little cunts, and getting randy and
|
||
reckless I determined to try. They stopped at a sweetmeat-shop; going
|
||
to the side of them, and looking into the shop, not at them, so as to
|
||
prevent my being noticed, "I'll buy you whatever you want if you will
|
||
come with me", I said. The bigger of the two edged away from me, after
|
||
looking up in my face, whispered something to her companion, and they
|
||
both moved along the street without noticing me further.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was disconcerted, and went over to the opposite side of the way again
|
||
watching them, they went to a print-shop, and looked in; the big one
|
||
looked in the direction of a lolly-pop shop, and up and down the
|
||
street. She was looking after me evidently, so I crossed over, met them
|
||
full-face, and as I passed said without stopping, "Come with me, and
|
||
I'll give you money."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I turned a corner, and looked, they were at another shop, the bigger
|
||
girl with her arm round the smaller one's neck. I again passed them,
|
||
going back to do so, and saying, "I'll give you three and sixpence."
|
||
That was the exact sum, and then turned up a street which led to baudy
|
||
houses, and waited at the turning into the street.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The two girls turned the corner, stopped, and talked, the bigger laid
|
||
hold of, and slightly pulled the smaller, and seemed to be persuading
|
||
her. Failing apparently she left her, but turned back, spoke to her
|
||
again, and both came on together. Then I turned into the back-street,
|
||
the two girls appeared at the corner of that, and then stopped and
|
||
talked for a minute. Tired of waiting I thought I had made a mistake,
|
||
and going slowly back heard the bigger one say, "You <i>are a foule</i>."
|
||
"Oh! you <i>foule</i>." "Come he wants us." "You <i>foule</i>."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I don't want her," said I, "but you,—come,"—and returning entered a
|
||
baudy house, the outer-door of which stood open, thinking the bigger one
|
||
would follow, and sure now that she was a harlot. I then passed through
|
||
the inner door which as usual then had a glass window covered with a red
|
||
curtain.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A minute elapsed, the baudy house-keeper had been spoken to, but the
|
||
girl not coming, I opened the door to look out. The bigger girl was
|
||
just inside the outer door, and was pulling in the other one. "Come you
|
||
foule,—you said you would,—he'll give you money as well as me, and
|
||
I'll give you some of mine too,—well you are a foule," quite bawling it
|
||
out. There was not much secrecy needed in such things at those times, in
|
||
those streets.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I don't want <i>her</i>," said I hurriedly, "it's you,—come in, or I won't
|
||
wait." She came in, the other girl disappeared, and we were soon in a
|
||
bed-room together.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was the first house at that end of the street, had been newly opened,
|
||
and was furnished in a style not like a baudy house; no show, neat and
|
||
clean, but cheaply; no bed-hangings (and in those days most baudy houses
|
||
had bed-hangings), the blinds were new and white, the beds quite clean.
|
||
The top-floor room where I went for economy was two shillings and
|
||
sixpence. The woman of the house was tall, comely, and middle-aged. As
|
||
I paid her I noticed she had fat red cheeks. How curious that I should
|
||
recollect those red cheeks. She had a white apron on, and was a civil
|
||
sort of creature.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl stood still staring at me. Sitting on the edge of the bed
|
||
I stared at her, filled with baudy curiosity and the appreciation of
|
||
novelty. "Why won't you have the other gal?" said she. "I don't want
|
||
her, nor want two,—and she is a dirty little imp." "No she ain't dirty,
|
||
she washes herself like me,—let her come up." "No,—come you here."
|
||
"She is quite clean,—I wash her myself sometimes." "No, come here I
|
||
tell you."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl came to me dawling. I put my hands up her clothes. A fleshy
|
||
little bum met my hand, then in the front a smooth belly, a motte almost
|
||
hairless as it seemed. She said not a word, but gave a sort of jerk of
|
||
her body, and as my hand touched her bum it jutted forwards, and as I
|
||
drew my hand round to her belly she drew her belly back. It did not seem
|
||
like shame. She did not utter a word. "Take off your things", said I.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She drew away from me, and took off her bonnet, then stood still. "Off
|
||
with your things," I said throwing off some of mine. "I can't take them
|
||
off,—if I do I can't fasten them again, they are in a knot." "Take
|
||
them off." "If I do you will have to fasten me." "So I will." Slowly she
|
||
stripped to her chemise. "Take that off." "I won't." "Come here then."
|
||
She came. Laying hold of her I lifted her bodily, and threw her with her
|
||
back on the bed, throwing up her chemise and stretching open her legs
|
||
quickly. She gave a suppressed "hoh!" put her hand down to her cunt, and
|
||
felt her mons nervously.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Take away your hand dear." She took it away, then I pulled open her
|
||
little thing. Such a delicious little gap it was, with the smallest
|
||
possible quantity of golden hair just showing on it; such a smooth white
|
||
belly and thighs, and all so plump, that I was wonder-struck at a young
|
||
girl being so round and fine. I had not expected under that shabby black
|
||
clothing anything so nice. I was charmed with her head also; in a big
|
||
black and shabby bonnet I had seen nothing but a white face and large
|
||
blue eyes. Her hair was golden in tone, bright and flowing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Whilst pulling off my trowsers she sat up and asked, "Is it big?" For
|
||
the instant I did not quite know what she meant. "What's big?" "Your
|
||
thing,—measure it." I went up to her pulling out my pego. "It is
|
||
big," said she. "It's little," said I. "It ain't,—it's big." "No."
|
||
"Yes,—don't push hard sir,—will you now?" "No my dear I won't,—Is it
|
||
bigger than other men's pricks?" "I shan't tell you." "Well lay down and
|
||
open your thighs,"—again I lifted her on to the bed. "Don't you do it
|
||
hard," said she getting up again, "or I won't let you." "Then I won't
|
||
pay you." Back she fell, I wetted my prick, put it to the notch, and
|
||
with a shove or two was well up her. She gave a "oh,—oooh!" and then
|
||
laid quiet. Grasping her fat little bum I fucked, then stopping pulled
|
||
out my prick, and looked at her cunt. "What are you a going to do?" said
|
||
she in an astonished way.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Get quite on to the bed dear." Slow at obeying I helped her into the
|
||
posture, and got on to her, and brought my pleasure to an end, lying on
|
||
the top of the pretty little girl.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I lay on her long afterwards, and tried by the muscular contraction
|
||
of my arse-cheeks and ballock-roots to stiffen my pego again. She laid
|
||
quiet all the time with my prick up her, but I could not manage it, my
|
||
prick shrunk.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A second erection without uncunting being impossible, I got into a
|
||
kneeling posture between her open legs, and checked a slight movement
|
||
on her part saying, "Now lie quiet,—don't move." There was I kneeling
|
||
between her thighs; looking down I saw her half-opened cunt with the
|
||
gruelly tide issuing from it, took my prick in hand half its potential
|
||
size, flabby and wet, pulled back the skin, and out rolled a large drop
|
||
of sperm on to her thigh. She lay quite quiet, looking at me, her yellow
|
||
hair falling all around her head as it lay on the pillow. Now I was
|
||
astonished at her beauty, I had not noticed it fully before.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You are very handsome,—how old are you?" "Fifteen and a little." "You
|
||
must be more." "I don't know, but mother says so." I looked at her cunt,
|
||
the hair on it was not an eighth of an inch long, scarcely any of it,
|
||
and of course showing no intention of curling, but her form was so round
|
||
that I could not believe she was so young. "Fifteen and a little," she
|
||
repeated, her aunt and her mother had been disputing the day of her
|
||
birth; her mother was out of her mind when she gave birth to her. "Aunt
|
||
says I ain't fifteen."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Give the other gal a shilling,—do," she broke in whilst I was
|
||
questioning her about age, and kneeling between her thighs. "What are
|
||
you so anxious about the other girl for?" "She lives over us, and is my
|
||
friend,—will you give her a shilling?—do." "Why?" "Do,—if you don't
|
||
I shall give her a shilling of mine, and give her some of mine
|
||
anyhow,—you said you'd give me three and sixpence, didn't you?"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Curiously amused I laughed. "I'll give you a shilling for her, if you
|
||
let me do it to you again." "Oh! <i>do</i>," said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was hot, I had not reposed after my pleasure, so quitting my kneeling
|
||
position I laid down besides her, and began feeling her breasts. She
|
||
turned her head towards me. "You have not washed yourself," said I after
|
||
a minute's amusement with her bubbles. "It ain't no good if yer ar going
|
||
to make a mess in it agin,—when you've done it I'll wash it all out
|
||
together." I thought from that speech she was not an old one at the
|
||
game, yet after all she only behaved as every young girl I have had
|
||
usually behaved, they have mostly objected to washing their cunts
|
||
directly after a poke, I think they rarely wash it until requested.
|
||
There must be some sweet tranquillizing pleasure which a man's sperm
|
||
gives to a woman's cunt, and makes her undesirous of washing it out. It
|
||
is only when a woman knows it is good for her health if she be gay, that
|
||
she ever does it. No married woman washes the sperm out of her cunt, yet
|
||
in the morning after a night's fucking you never find the sperm if you
|
||
feel in the cunt for it,—where does it go?—it is absorbed I suppose.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We lay thus and talked. "How old are you really?" "Fifteen and two
|
||
months, as I told yer,—I always was fat, but ain't so fat as I was
|
||
though,—father used to say I should get fat on gruel." I should have
|
||
guessed her full sixteen had it not been for the little hair there was
|
||
on her motte, and the delicate pink small cut, and tight prick-hole.
|
||
"How long have you been gay?" "I ain't gay," said she astonished. "Yes
|
||
you are." "No I ain't." "You let men fuck you, don't you?" "Yes, but I
|
||
ain't gay." "What do you call gay?" "Why the gals who come out regular
|
||
of a night dressed up, and gets their livings by it." I was amused.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't you?" "No, mother keeps me." "What is your father?" "Got none,
|
||
he's dead three months back,—mother works, and keeps us.—she is a
|
||
charwoman, and goes out on odd jobs." "Don't you work?" "Not now," said
|
||
she in a confused way, "mother does not want me to, I takes care of the
|
||
others." "What others?" "The young ones." "How many?" "Two,—one's a
|
||
boy, and one's a gal." "How old?" "Sister's about six, and brother's
|
||
nearly eight,—but what do you ask me all this for?" "Only for
|
||
amusement,—then you are in mourning for your father?" "Yes, it's
|
||
shabby, ain't it?—I wish I could have nice clothes, I've got nice
|
||
boots,—ain't they?"—cocking up one leg, "a lady gived em me when
|
||
father died,—they are my best."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Are you often in the Strand?" "When I gets out I likes walking in it,
|
||
and looking at the shops,—I do if mother's out for the day." "Does she
|
||
know you are out?" The girl who had been lying on her back with her
|
||
head full towards me, turned on her side, and giggling said in a sort of
|
||
confidential way, "Bless you no,—she'd beat me if she knew,—when
|
||
she be out I locks them up, and takes the key, and then I goes back
|
||
to them,—I've got the key in my pocket, and shall be home before
|
||
mother,—she is out for the whole day."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Do the children know you're out?" "No, I says to them, 'You be quiet
|
||
now, I'm going to the yard.'" "What's the yard?" said I not reflecting.
|
||
The girl thought a minute, chuckled, turned her head, and was silent,
|
||
she was actually blushing. "What's the yard?" Suddenly it struck me,
|
||
"Going to the privy?" She burst out laughing. "Yes that's it, I say I'm
|
||
going to the privy, and then I comes out with her, and they can't get
|
||
out, so they are all right, and we go back together if she's with me; if
|
||
she ain't I go back by myself,—there,"—and she stopped satisfied with
|
||
her explanation. "They may set fire to themselves," said I. "There ain't
|
||
no fire after we have had breakfast, I puts it out, and lights it at
|
||
night if mother wants hot water."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What do you do with yourself all day?" "I washed both of them, I gives
|
||
them food if we've got any, then washes the floor and everything, and
|
||
then washes myself, then I looks out of the winer." "Wash yourself."
|
||
"Yes I washes from head to foot allus." "Have you a tub?" "No we've only
|
||
got a pail and a bowl, but I'm beautiful clean,—mother tells every one
|
||
I'm the beautifullest clean gal a mother ever had,—I wash everything,
|
||
mother's too tired. Sometimes we all go out and walk, but that's at
|
||
night; sometime I lays abed nearly all day."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was beautifully clean in her flesh, her linen was clean, its color
|
||
awful; but what could be expected from a pail, a bowl, and one room to
|
||
dry things in. "You can't always be washing." "No, I do all the mending
|
||
and making,—look how my finger is pricked," said she showing it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had been smoothing and feeling her all over, her unwashed cunt had
|
||
come in for its share of my attentions, I had been twiddling it till
|
||
outside it was dry. Recurring to the never-failing, and always charming
|
||
theme, I got close to her, kissed her, my fingers sought the innermost
|
||
recesses of her tight little orifice. "Don't you like fucking?—does it
|
||
give you pleasure?" "It never gived me much pleasure that I know on,"
|
||
she replied. "But you don't dislike it?" "Not if they don't hurt me."
|
||
"Do they ever?" "One or two have, if they push hard,—but I shan't say
|
||
no more,—there."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
There was a frankness, openness, and freshness about this girl which
|
||
delighted me. Question after question I put, and would be answered;
|
||
if evaded I put it in another shape, but she seemed willing mostly to
|
||
reply. I put into her little head things she had never dreamed of,
|
||
and all the time kept rubbing her clitoris, probing her little quim,
|
||
distending it, tickling it, and exciting her till she wriggled her
|
||
little fat bum.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Do I hurt you?" "Oh! no,"—"let me then,"—"oh! don't sir,—I wish you
|
||
would not." "Did you never enjoy the prick up you?—never enjoy a fuck!
|
||
—you shall enjoy it with me." "Don't now," said she turning herself
|
||
round as I frigged on. "Feel my prick dear." She did not need a second
|
||
invitation. "Is it not stiff?" "Yes, and big." "Yes,—yes,—but oh!
|
||
don't sir,—take away your hand,—ah!" I talked on, frigging and
|
||
tickling, my prick throbbing, but restraining myself, for instinct told
|
||
me she was about to enjoy a pleasure she had never enjoyed yet. All at
|
||
once she relinquished my prick, a slight heaving of her belly, and her
|
||
eyes closed, then I knew she was ready to discharge.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I ceased to frig, her eyes opened, her thighs which had closed opened
|
||
again. I joined my body to hers, and we were one, I fucked,—<i>we</i> fucked
|
||
now, for the little lass in a minute or two was dissolving in pleasure
|
||
whilst I was pissing my sperm up her, groaning as the tightness of
|
||
her little cunt squeezed my sensitive prick. If Kitty was not a harlot
|
||
before, she was from that minute she had her spend with me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She laid quite quiet till nature dissolved our fleshy union by uncunting
|
||
me, then I laid by her side, she on her back, her thighs wide open, her
|
||
eyes closed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't it give you pleasure?" After repeating that half-a-dozen times
|
||
she said, "I don't know." "Yes you do,—did you spend?" "I don't
|
||
know what a girl's spending is," said she. "Did my prick give you
|
||
pleasure,—tell me Kitty?" At length she said yes, and she had never had
|
||
pleasure with men before. (Two years afterwards she repeated that the
|
||
first pleasure she ever had with a man was with me.) "Wash yourself."
|
||
"I'll wash when I go home." "Wash now you little beast." "What does
|
||
it matter to you?" "Wash you little devil." She washed carefully, and
|
||
whilst doing so, "Piddle," said I. "I can't abear to piddle before a
|
||
man,—what a funny man you are." "Piddle my dear," and the little dear
|
||
piddled.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Wiping herself dry she stopped in the middle of the operation and asked,
|
||
"Why wouldn't you have the other gal?" "What do you want me to have her
|
||
for?" "She's very poor." "What do you do with your money?" "Buy things
|
||
to eat,—mother's very poor, we often ain't got enough to eat." "Then
|
||
you get a little money by being gay." "I ain't gay I tell you." "Well
|
||
your friend is I suppose, and gets money." "No she doesn't,—she
|
||
isn't gay either,—no man ain't ever done it to her, she's such a
|
||
<i>foule</i>,—but she would a come in to-day with you, she said she would,
|
||
and she were just a comin when you sent her off,—she promised me, she'd
|
||
let yer if you wanted,—but she is a foule though."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I don't believe that." "It's God's truth though, she ain't, she says
|
||
she ain't; she knows what men want gals for, but she's never let any
|
||
one,—I know she ain't, she is frightened." "Have you looked at her
|
||
cunt?" "Often," said Kitty. "And she's looked at yours?" "Of course she
|
||
has,—she lives over us I tell you, I go up to her, and she comes down
|
||
to me when mother's out,—I wash her." "You seem fond of washing." "I
|
||
likes things clean." I thought for an instant, "It may be true, I should
|
||
like to see her cunt if she's never been poked,—what object has this
|
||
little lass in pressing this so?" Then said I, "Tell me the truth, and
|
||
I'll give you another shilling,—don't lie,—I shall soon tell whether
|
||
you're lying or not," and getting up, "here is three and six (I had it
|
||
on the mantle-piece), here's a shilling for her, and there is another.
|
||
If you answer truly, I'll see you again; but I'll never see you again if
|
||
I find you are making up lies,—come here." And I sat down.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She came forward, I pulled her between my naked legs, her naked thighs
|
||
met mine, her little cunt was close to my prick, I put my hand round her
|
||
fat little bum, and looked her in the face, pressing her belly close to
|
||
mine.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What do you want me to have her for?" "Only cos she's so poor,—why
|
||
she only gets sixpence a day,—she works at sack-making,—oh! isn't it
|
||
hard!—and her hands if you seed em, are hard and brown, stained with
|
||
the string, and what the works with,—mother wants me to work at them at
|
||
home, but I won't—I tells her I'd run away first,—she is so little she
|
||
can't carry the sacks home as other gals do; so a strong young woman who
|
||
works at sacks carries them home for her, and charges her twopence for
|
||
it,—they car-ries them home on the top of their heads; but she is too
|
||
little, she is." (At that time women worked at sack-making, and carried
|
||
them home on their heads.)
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Can she put her finger up her cunt?" "I shan't tell you all that," said
|
||
she turning nasty. "Is her cunt as open as yours?" "No it ain't." "Then
|
||
she can't get her finger up." "Oh! you are a rum cove, you are,"
|
||
said she breaking away from me, "I never seed the like of you. I must
|
||
go,—tell me what time it is." "Half-past four." "I'll go,—I give the
|
||
children something to eat about this time." "Come here, or I won't give
|
||
you the shillings." We resumed our positions. "Are you sure she has
|
||
never had a man?" "Never, she's such a <i>foule</i>,—she says she'd like to,
|
||
and she'd like the money, and yet she won't,—she is <i>such</i> a <i>foule</i>."
|
||
"How long have <i>you</i> done it?" "Only since we have lived this side of
|
||
the water, after father died." "How many men have you had?" "I shan't
|
||
say,—I don't recollect,—it arn't no business of yourn,—you don't
|
||
like me." "Yes I like you, but I won't tell,—no it isn't a dozen,—I
|
||
shan't say who first did it,—I shan't then,—it isn't a dozen,—yes I
|
||
am quite sure, I don't think it's ten, but it may be about that, I think
|
||
it's eight,—they didn't all do it to me, no they didn't,—one on em
|
||
only put his hands up my clothes, and went off in a minute; another
|
||
pulled up my clothes, and looked at me, and then he—" She stopped, and
|
||
I could not get her to say what, so promised her another shilling. "I
|
||
don't know what he did." "Frig himself?" "I don't know what you call
|
||
it,—yes he did that," said the girl bursting into a roar of laughter
|
||
when I showed her the operation. "I looked at him, and he went away
|
||
without speaking,—he only gave me half-a-crown; but an old gentleman
|
||
one day gave me a gold bit of ten shillings." She began counting on her
|
||
fingers. I thought she was reckoning her gains, she was a long time at
|
||
it, doing it over and over again; at length, "It's seven," said she.
|
||
"What?" "Gentlemen,—you make eight."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Your little friend is too young," said I. "She is fourteen, but shorter
|
||
than me." "Has she any hair on her cunt?" "You can just see some coming,
|
||
and it's black." "She is dirty." "No she ain't, but she was till she
|
||
knew me,—she can't help her clothes being dirty, but she mends em,—how
|
||
I wish I had nice clothes like the gals about at night, and like
|
||
gentlefolks!" said Kitty in a sort of ecstacy, and then tossed up
|
||
half-a-crown, and caught it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I began to long for the other girl, and told her she might bring her the
|
||
next day, that she should have three and sixpence, and her friend the
|
||
same, and more if I did it. Kitty went off agreeing to meet me with her
|
||
if their mothers were out, but if not, the day after, all depended on
|
||
their mothers' absence. She would listen to the church-clock, and as it
|
||
struck three she would leave; it was only by listening that she knew the
|
||
time. She would put by a penny for the bridge-toll; generally she went
|
||
round by Westminster bridge to avoid paying the penny. Then we left.
|
||
Her little friend I found was loitering close by. They went into a
|
||
pastry-cook's, and I watched them both eating together as they went
|
||
along towards Waterloo bridge, Kitt and Pol.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0004"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER IV.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Little Pol consents.—Arsy-versy.—Broached, and howling.—
|
||
Kitty's vocalization.—A cheap virginity.—Two hours after.—
|
||
Love's money lost.—The street-gully.—Kitty pleases.—Pol
|
||
tires.—Kitty's habits.—Friendliness and frankness.—
|
||
Sausage rolls.—Confessions of lust.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On the appointed day I saw Kitty but alone, she followed me to the
|
||
house, and soon by my pego her sweet little cunt was distended. I had
|
||
her all the afternoon, and tailed her to the extent of my powers. The
|
||
girl was delighted, her eyes sparkled with lewdness. Was fucking nice?
|
||
"Oh! yes, yes," she replied, it was nicer than she thought, nicer
|
||
than gals told her it would be. This was after I had called her at our
|
||
meeting a little humbug, for not bringing her friend. The excuse was
|
||
that Pol's mother was at home. I did not believe it, but was so content
|
||
with her sweet little form, the ease with which I handled her, the
|
||
enticing look of the cunt, its tightness, and her pleasant, frank
|
||
manners, that I forgot all about the other little one, till going
|
||
away, then said, "Mind you bring your friend, and I'll give you five
|
||
shillings, but you know you won't, you little storyteller." "I will,—I
|
||
shall,—I'll make her come,—she wants, but she is such a foule,—and
|
||
she's frightened of her mother."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Another blazing hot day. The two were looking in at the pastry-cook's,
|
||
the taller with her arm round the neck of the other. I watched them for
|
||
a minute, Kit often looked around anxiously, and seeing me, moved off
|
||
quickly towards the street. I followed on the opposite side of the way,
|
||
then stopped. The small one stood with her back against a wall, Kitty
|
||
was gesticulating. I went on passing without noticing them. As I passed
|
||
I heard, "You are a <i>foule</i>,—you're a <i>liar</i>,—you said you would."
|
||
"I shan't then." Turning the corner I looked back. There they still were
|
||
standing as on the first day I saw them. Thought I, "She can't persuade
|
||
the little one," so walked on to W..l....n Street, to the Lyceum
|
||
portico, and back again in a fever of expectancy. As I got near the
|
||
house they both turned the corner, so in I went and waited till both
|
||
girls appeared, and soon heard two pairs of feet after me on the same
|
||
staircase, two young voices whispering, the Mistress following us all.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Why five shillings?" "You have <i>two</i> young ladies to-day, double price
|
||
you know sir." I did <i>not</i> know, for it was the first time I had had two
|
||
women together in a house. Excited and anxious I had got to fucking-heat
|
||
in anticipation of a small unprobed cunt, paid the money, and there was
|
||
I with the two little ones face to face, two young cunts at my disposal,
|
||
a novelty, and a charming one. The woman closed the door, casting a
|
||
queer look at the girls and me. I locked it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I put my hand up Kitty's clothes, the other girl, an ugly little imp
|
||
in a bonnet as big as a coal-scuttle, and with boots which looked as if
|
||
they were her mother's, stood and stared with eyes wide open,—they were
|
||
dark, and her hair nearly black. "Come here my dear." "Come to him,"
|
||
said Kitty. The girl drew near, I took her on my knee. "So you are the
|
||
friend of Kitty, and we are going to play with each other naked, aren't
|
||
we?—I'm going to look at your cunt, and you are going to feel my cock."
|
||
She made no reply. "I'm going to look where your piddle comes out,
|
||
aren't I?" "<i>No</i>," said the girl sullenly after reflecting a minute, and
|
||
hanging her head on one side, "I shan't."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Yes he is you foule,—oh! you <i>are</i> a foule," burst out Kitty, "I wish
|
||
I didn't know you, you are <i>such</i> a foule,—she said she would sir,
|
||
she knows all about it, she does, she knows what she has comed for, she
|
||
does,—now don't be a foule (in a threatening manner), I won't speak to
|
||
you agin, nor gi yer nothink (Kitty's English was awful),—you may get
|
||
yer belly filled, I won't help fill it." All this over and over again,
|
||
in anger.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl looked at Kitty humbly. "Well I will then." I put my hands up
|
||
her petticoats on to a lean pair of thighs. "Take off your things." "Yes
|
||
<i>take</i> them off," said Kitty helping her off with her bonnet, and to
|
||
undress. "Are you going to take off yours Kitty?" said she. "Yes when
|
||
you have," and without more ado she stripped the girl to her chemise,
|
||
and herself likewise. I took off all but my shirt and socks. It was a
|
||
sweating hot day.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl was not very inviting, was heavy and lubberly, and looked as if
|
||
she had not enough to eat; but there was in her a virgin cunt, so I was
|
||
told, although even then a little sceptical about what a female told me
|
||
on that point. My tooleywag was standing at the idea, I shook it before
|
||
them, and calling both to me held them round their naked bums, and made
|
||
them feel me. The pair of little fists anxiously feeling from the root
|
||
of my balls to the tip of the piercer soon rendered me impatient for
|
||
action. I was near the side of the bed facing the windows, and through
|
||
the white blinds came the strong light of a summer's afternoon. Lifting
|
||
the fresh one from my knee I put her on her back on the bed, and lifted
|
||
her scanty chemise. Close went her legs together, I opened them, she
|
||
resisted, I grew angry, Kitty called her a foule. Coaxed and bullied
|
||
at the same time she yielded, I pulled the legs wide open, and kneeling
|
||
threw one over my shoulder, the other I pressed outwards, and with my
|
||
other hand opened her cunt-lips wide; then she kicked her legs over me,
|
||
and turning arse upwards got up. A little row, again she yielded, again
|
||
served me the same trick. I damned her for a bitch, and Kitty reviled
|
||
her. "She is a fool Kitty,—show her what I want." Kitty hesitated
|
||
a moment, then throwing herself on to the bed opened her thighs, and
|
||
pulled her cunt-lips apart. The young one gradually persuaded let me
|
||
do for her what Kitty did for herself, after she had carefully studied
|
||
Kitty's quim for a minute.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I saw with speechless excitement the girl's cunt, which seemed at first
|
||
glance as if a prick had entered it; but looking more closely saw that
|
||
the perforation was too small. I thrust gently my finger up it,—a
|
||
cry,—a howl. "Don't,—you're a hurting," and again the little devil
|
||
was arse upwards on the bed. Again I coaxed, promised, lied, and Kitty
|
||
bullied; again I saw the cunt, that it was not like cunts that had been
|
||
fucked: the hairless lips, a little black tint just above the notch,
|
||
a little hole. My eyesight failed me, the demon of desire said, "It's
|
||
fresh, it's virgin,—bore it,—bung it,—plug it,—stretch it,—split
|
||
it,—spunk in it," and I laid hold of her thin backside mad with lust,
|
||
kissing and sniffling at her cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Let's lay on the bed, and all strip quite naked,—it's so hot." "Yes
|
||
do," said Kitty. She stripped the girl of her pea-soup coloured rag,
|
||
and we both stripped. There we were in a minute all three naked, close
|
||
together, with but little room, the girl in the middle. I pressed to
|
||
her, put her hand round my prick, talked baudy. Kitty said, "Now let
|
||
him." The girl said no. I put one leg over, and worked myself between
|
||
her little thighs, partly holding myself up on my elbow and pattering
|
||
baudy which Kitty kept repeating. "It won't hurt dear." "No it won't
|
||
hurt," said Kitty. "Just let me touch it with his prick." Kitty in her
|
||
anxiety slipped right off the bed, and getting herself up stood by the
|
||
bedside repeating the baudy words I uttered.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl lay quiet, Kitty telling her not to be a fool; but <i>I</i> was a
|
||
fool, for the notch being small I did not hit it well. Putting my prick
|
||
down to where my fingers underlied the split, I pushed towards the goal,
|
||
not pressing her with my body, but keeping my weight off by leaning on
|
||
my right elbow, for it seemed that if I laid on her I should crush
|
||
and frighten her, the girl seemed so slim. My tool struck hard at the
|
||
orifice, she howled. Fearing to miss my game I then fell with the
|
||
full weight of my body on her, grasping her thin buttocks, and nearly
|
||
stifling her on that hot afternoon, determined to have her if I killed
|
||
her. The girl gave howl after howl, and I rammed with all my might
|
||
the more. "Hish!—hold your tongue you foule," said Kitty. As the girl
|
||
wriggled violently, and cried.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Damn you, if you are not quiet I'll rip your dress into ribbons, and
|
||
you may go home, and tell your mother what you like,—damn you I'll
|
||
murder you,—I'll give you ten shillings." "You fool he'll give you ten
|
||
shillings." I heard no more, oscillating my arse, and driving with all
|
||
my force between her legs, I knew not how, I knew not where. Still the
|
||
girl howled, and Kitty kept hushing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"The woman will turn us out of the house you foule,—she won't let me
|
||
come in again,—oh! you foule," said Kitty. In my blind battering I
|
||
at last lodged the tip well between the lips. The next instant with a
|
||
cunt-splitting thrust I was up the howling little bitch who wriggled
|
||
like an eel; but I held her skinny arse up to me like a vice, kept my
|
||
peg fixed and un-moveably up her in spite of her. Her wriggles alone
|
||
would have kept it stiff enough, and fetched me. "Be quiet,—I am up
|
||
you,—I can't h—hurt—you—now,—ah!"—and my spunk was up the virgin
|
||
quim of the ugly little devil.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She laid quiet, but whinning, "Oh! you said you would not hurt
|
||
me,—ho!—hho!" she sobbed, then laid quite still with my prick up her,
|
||
snottily whimpering, "o—oho!"—and all was tranquil, I nearly asleep.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Is it in her?" said Kitty in a whisper, "is it in yer Pol?" Having got
|
||
no answer from me. "Oh! what a foule you are." "I've done it," said
|
||
I. "Let her get up," said Kit. I don't recollect having been up such a
|
||
tight cunt, not that it gave me pleasure, but the extreme tightness was
|
||
such a novelty. "I will do it again." "Have you done it really?" said
|
||
Kitty. "Put your hand and feel," said I opening my legs a little to
|
||
let Kitty feel under my testicles, "my prick's right up her cunt
|
||
now,—feel."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Have you done it really?" "Yes,—feel." "Ri—tol—lural—li—do!"
|
||
said Kitty setting off in a happy dance all round the room. I went on
|
||
fucking, keeping the girl quiet, I could pull her little form up to me
|
||
as tight as wax, and coaxing and promising all sorts of things I fucked
|
||
her again without uncunting.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Have you really done it?" said Kitty again. "Yes twice,—put your hand
|
||
up under my balls and feel." Kitty thinking better of the suggestion
|
||
this time did so, and satisfying herself that my prick was out of her
|
||
touch, set off dancing again with a "ri—too—ralooral—ledo!" I got
|
||
off the girl, the hair of my prick saturated with blood and spunk. "She
|
||
is bleeding." The girl began snivelling worse than ever when she heard
|
||
that, and began feeling her cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What are you crying for you foule?—did he hurt you much?—let's look
|
||
at it,"—and Kitty looked at the little quim bunged up with sperm mixed
|
||
with blood. "Oh! ain't he done it!—ritollooralado, ritolloolra-lado,"
|
||
and she capered again. "What are you dancing and singing for?" I asked.
|
||
"She's had it done,—oh! look what a mess is on the bed, the woman will
|
||
kick up a row."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Get up and wash it you fool, and don't cry." "It hurts." "Wash it."
|
||
"It will hurt." "No it won't you foule." Here Kitty put a basin on the
|
||
floor, pushed the girl towards it, and made her wash. Then we got her on
|
||
to the bed, and both of us took a long, long look at her split. It was
|
||
bleeding freely, I saw the ragged edge my intrusion had made, and not
|
||
feeling inclined for more fucking gave the girl half-a-sovereign in
|
||
gold, Kitty five shillings, and went off leaving them still naked, Kitty
|
||
from time to time looking at her friend's wounded orifice, and saying it
|
||
would soon be all right, that her thing had bled also. I had fear that I
|
||
might be in trouble through my voluptuousness, although a girl of twelve
|
||
years is competent to judge of her own fitness for fucking, and many not
|
||
a month over that age are plugged daily in London.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had to go to the Temple that afternoon, returning along the Strand an
|
||
hour afterwards, not thinking of my afternoon's amusement, for I had had
|
||
a disagreeable interview with solicitors, when just at the end of C——-
|
||
Street was a slight crowd, in the middle of it the two girls, and the
|
||
one I had fucked an hour before crying. Some man gave her money. "Oh!
|
||
Lord," thought I, "here is a row about what I have been doing," so got
|
||
into a cab, and drove off. When a mile away I began to reflect, and felt
|
||
more comfortable, but still uneasy, and determined not to meet them the
|
||
next day as I had promised. The day after I saw Kitty walking by
|
||
herself, that funked me again, so I cut away without her seeing me.
|
||
Thought I, "There will be a row about that ugly little lump having been
|
||
pierced, I will go no more." But the letch was so strong that I could
|
||
not resist, and on the third day driving past in a cab I saw the two
|
||
girls as usual looking in at shops. Alighting I winked as I passed,
|
||
heard one say, "Here he is," and three minutes afterwards we were all in
|
||
the house again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To strip the two, and examine their cunts was an affair of five minutes,
|
||
then laying the little one open-legged I looked at hers tranquilly, and
|
||
saw how the slit was completed. The girl whose name I forget, but will
|
||
call Pol, put her finger down, and indicated where, she felt a
|
||
difference had been made in the shape. I fucked the lass at the side of
|
||
the bed, proping up her skinny rump with pillows, Kitty with her face
|
||
about a foot off admiring the prick as it shoved in and out the little
|
||
red orifice. It was a novelty to her to see it done.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty was an odd girl. "Don't hurt her now," she kept saying. The little
|
||
one had objected to my probing her again with my prick, but saying I
|
||
should otherwise not give her a farthing she consented. My delight
|
||
was increased by the power I found I had of making her howl whenever I
|
||
shoved vigorously, and I nearly knocked my prick through into her womb I
|
||
imagine. The more she howled the more I banged my prick up her, the more
|
||
I enjoyed her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When it was over I asked how she had spent her money. Out burst the
|
||
little animal into tears. "She made me drop it, I didn't spend any of
|
||
it sir, I lost it." "You dropped it yourself," said Kitty. "You lie."
|
||
"I don't." "She does,"—and so on, and I got at the facts when Kitty had
|
||
vigorously slapped the face of her friend, and called her fifty times a
|
||
<i>foule</i>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Going into the Strand the girl had the money in her hand, Kitty told her
|
||
to put it into her pocket. She refused. Kitty said she would lose it,
|
||
and just then she dropped it close by a sewer-grating, down which the
|
||
half-sovereign went. The girl cried, the two quarrelled, and there was
|
||
soon a crowd round them. Kitty said that the girl's mother had given her
|
||
a half-sovereign to buy some bread with, and she had lost it. Some one
|
||
gave the girl sixpence, the crowd dispersed, and Pol lost the fruits of
|
||
her first fucking. Never was lost a virginity so poorly rewarded. I did
|
||
not make up her loss, but gave her half-a-crown with which she was well
|
||
contented. I certainly was in luck to get all this fun for such trifling
|
||
sums, I being still in poorish circumstances. Five years before I would
|
||
have given thirty pounds for the same, and had paid two hundred for
|
||
Louise.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Giving Kitty three and six, and beginning to put on my drawers she said,
|
||
"Oh! do it to me, you have done it to her." "Do you want it?" "Yes."
|
||
"Feel my cock." Kitty grasped it eagerly, we got on to the bed, Pol
|
||
watched now the graceful manipulation, insertion, and wriggles of
|
||
pleasure of her friend, for Kitty was fast learning fucking, though
|
||
quite innocent of the art of frigging. I never knew such a bungler as
|
||
she was at her first attempt at that.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I grew tired of ugly little Pol when I had bored her a few times, and
|
||
would not have her again. Kitty I continued to see, she was a most
|
||
amusing girl. Too young on the town to have learnt the tricks and
|
||
cunning of a harlot, naturally frank and truthful, with some liking for
|
||
me (for she looked forward to our voluptuous dallyings), she gave me for
|
||
a long time much amusement, and I heard the incidents of her short life.
|
||
She would jabber like a magpie about them when she knew me well, which
|
||
she soon did, and began to look to me regularly for her supply of money.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She used directly she caught sight of me, to walk as fast as possible
|
||
towards the house, and get in before me. She was in the room waiting and
|
||
grinning when I got there. "Shall I take off my things?" "Yes." Off
|
||
they went, and on to the bed the plump white-skinned little girl rolled
|
||
whilst I undressed at leisure. "Open your legs Kit, and let's see your
|
||
cunt." How she clutched my prick the moment I was by the side of her. It
|
||
really was very nice.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She said, "I buy things to eat, I can't eat what mother gives us, she is
|
||
poor, and works very hard, she'd give us more, but she can't; so I
|
||
buys food, and gives the others what mother gives me, they don't know
|
||
better,—if mother's there I eat some, sometimes we have only gruel and
|
||
salt; if we have a fire we toast the bread, but I can't eat it if I am
|
||
not dreadful hungry." "What do you like?" "Pies and sausage-rolls,"
|
||
said the girl smacking her lips and laughing, "oh! my eye ain't they
|
||
prime,—oh!" "That's what you went gay for?" "I'm not gay," said she
|
||
sulkily. "Well what you let men fuck you for." "Yes." "Sausage-rolls?"
|
||
"Yes, meat-pies and pastry too."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What did you let the first man do it to you for?" "I don't know, he
|
||
came up to me and told me he'd give me some money, if I would go to
|
||
a house with him,—he only wanted to talk with me, and I was then so
|
||
hungry. He took me to No. 4, just opposite here, and did it to me."
|
||
"What did he give you?" "Five shillings." "You had never had it before?"
|
||
"Never." "I don't believe you." "I never had, I'm only fifteen and
|
||
a little,—he met me in the Strand near where you did," she cried
|
||
indignantly. "Did he hurt you?" "Yes, and made me bleed,—I was upset,
|
||
and didn't think much about it till I got home and found my shemmy
|
||
bloody. I washed it, and put it on again quite wet, so that mother
|
||
mightn't know."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
As she talked she would feel my cock, every now and then raise her head
|
||
to look at it, fall back again as if satisfied, and go on feeling it and
|
||
talking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was intensely curious about my prick, would lay and examine it for
|
||
half-an-hour at a time silently. One day after feeling it she asked
|
||
if she might do what she liked with it. Certainly. She moved on to her
|
||
knees (we were both stark naked on the bed, and had fucked not long
|
||
before), and began feeling it, skinning, then covering the tip, looking
|
||
under the balls and smelling it. "How smooth and red it is," said
|
||
she,—"Does that hurt?" and she rubbed her finger over the tip orifice.
|
||
"A little,—wet your finger," She did. "Shall I wet it with my tongue?"
|
||
"Do." She licked it, and bit by bit put it into her mouth, asking me
|
||
occasionally if she hurt me. I laid amused with the sexual promptings of
|
||
her nature. She took it out of her mouth, put it in again, then it got
|
||
stiff, then she laughed. "Isn't it funny?" said she, "how smooth and red
|
||
it is,—first it's flabby, then it's stiff,"—and she relinquished it,
|
||
laying down across me, and contemplating it quite silently.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Did you do that to the other gentleman?" I asked. "Oh! no, never,—I
|
||
didn't think about it,—only one on em stopped long,"—and she told me
|
||
about all of their doings. She could never make out but seven, though
|
||
she always asserted there were eight who had had her before me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I did not like either cock-sucking or cunt-licking at that epoch, and
|
||
stopped Kitty who was bent on stiffening it with her mouth. She had no
|
||
idea however of giving me a pleasure that way, it was simply curiosity
|
||
and novelty. Often she did the same thing, indeed always had a quarter
|
||
of an hour at it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I saw her about twice a week, sometimes more, it was all she could
|
||
manage "in dodging her mother." I gave her three and sixpence each time,
|
||
which made her quite happy and contented, and it was a very economical
|
||
pleasure to me. She learnt much from me, in six weeks blushed at
|
||
nothing, and was impatient to be fucked. "Do that afterwards," would she
|
||
say if I dallied long in the preliminaries, then quietly, "Oh! ain't
|
||
it pleasure!" she added in an artless satisfied way. Then somehow she
|
||
persuaded her mother that she might go out if fine for a little time in
|
||
the afternoon, and she was let out occasionally when the mother was
|
||
at home, but which rarely was the case; and then I saw the pretty lass
|
||
almost daily, but always in the afternoon; and her impatience to have
|
||
the pleasure of fucking became almost comical.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0005"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER V.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Kitty's antecedents.—The fishmonger's.—Jim the shopman.—
|
||
Betty the maid.—Females in bed.—Mutual curiosity.—
|
||
Letchery and frigging.—Educated in coition.—Against the
|
||
kitchen-wall.—Jim in bed.—Betty's cunt washed out.—A look
|
||
in the basin.—Cousin Grace, and cousin Bob.—Bob on the
|
||
spree.—A scuffle.—Topsy-turvy.—Arsy-versy.—Bob's semen.—
|
||
A masturbating duet.—Caught in the act.—Kicked out.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I questioned her many a time, and put together here consecutively what
|
||
she said. She was as much pleased to gossip about it as I was.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was the daughter of a carpenter, had been kept at home to help
|
||
her mother, till six months previously to my meeting her, when growing
|
||
restive, and I dare say her animal vigor inciting her to go forth into
|
||
the world, she went into a situation at a fishmonger's who wanted some
|
||
girl to nurse a little child, his wife being ill.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I believed she had told me most things about herself from the time the
|
||
doodle had first penetrated her: yet why had not such a big girl been
|
||
put to earn her living? she said that her mother was always in the
|
||
family way, or a child was ill, so she being the biggest helped at home.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But she had been in service, about all of which she told me one hot
|
||
afternoon. Ice was then a luxury, they charged two pence extra for a
|
||
bottle of gingerbeer iced. She was fond of gingerbeer, we had some iced
|
||
with sherry, and lay on the bed drinking it as she told me her story
|
||
bit by bit. This is an account of my doings, and not of tales told me by
|
||
others, but I must tell <i>her</i> tale, for I believed every bit of it, and
|
||
it is almost part of my own, and this is how it came out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"If you never spent with a man till you did with me, you had frigged
|
||
yourself." "I never did till the gal at the fishmonger's did it to
|
||
me,—we slept together." "Then you had been in service?" "Only two
|
||
months, I went to mind a little child."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The fishmonger was a little struggling tradesman, in a house with a
|
||
shop on the ground-floor, and a little back-parlour, and kitchens, and a
|
||
cellar below where they kept fish-baskets.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Over the shop were two rooms, one was the fishmonger's bed-room, and two
|
||
bed-rooms above. The wife was confined to her bed, and her husband slept
|
||
alone in the back-room which was usually the female servant's; so the
|
||
servant was put into a bed on the top-floor. This maid cooked, cleaned,
|
||
did everything, and had an eye as well to the shop if her Mistress was
|
||
ill, and when Master and his man were out; but she could not mind the
|
||
child as well. The fishmonger asked the carpenter if he knew of a strong
|
||
steady lass, the carpenter named his own girl, and Kitty went for grub,
|
||
lodging, and one and six a week. She was to sleep with the maid on the
|
||
top-floor over the rooms where Master and Mistress slept. The servant's
|
||
name was Betty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The fishmonger drank. A young man named Jim went with him to market, and
|
||
sometimes without him if he had been very drunk over night. Jim opened
|
||
the shop, harnessed the horse and cart, and every night when the Master
|
||
went to bed, Jim went to the underground kitchen, opened a cupboard,
|
||
pulled down something called a bed, and slept there.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jim was up first, and to bed but last, could not go to bed till the
|
||
maid-of-all-work was out of the kitchen. Jim pissed in the sink, and
|
||
made his own bed every morning as soon as he got up, which was done
|
||
by turning it up somehow into the cupboard, and then he called up his
|
||
Master and the maid. The privy was in the yard.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty took charge of the child, and the first night as she was going to
|
||
bed and took her things off Betty said, "Where is your night-gown?" "I
|
||
ain't got none," said Kitty, "I sleep in my shemmy." Betty tossed up
|
||
her head. Kitty cried. "Father's a poor man," said she, "but he's
|
||
respectable, and though I sleeps in my shemmy I am very clean, I washes
|
||
all over every day,—look at my legs and my neck,—but with my first
|
||
week's wages I'll buy a night-gown."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Never mind," said Betty, "you <i>are</i> clean, and you're fat,—your
|
||
dad gives you lots of grub,—don't cry, I only said, 'where's your
|
||
night-gown?'—Lord you are fat for your age!—how old did you say you
|
||
were?—why what a big bum you've got for your age!"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty had been staring at Betty, and the hair on the bottom of her
|
||
belly. "She was so hairy," said Kitty to me, "I had never seen a woman
|
||
naked before, and the hair on her belly made me look." "Say on her cunt
|
||
Kitty." "Well on her cunt,—such lots, and so black,—I had seen gals'
|
||
things, my cousins used to show me theirs, and I showed them mine to see
|
||
how our hair was coming; but I did not think a woman could grow such a
|
||
lot there."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was a cold night, the girl and the woman were in bed. "Come closer,
|
||
we will be warmer." Kitty got closer, then Bet began feeling Kitty. How
|
||
smooth, how soft she was, how plump, and not quite fifteen?—what a
|
||
bum,—why her thighs were quite large. "Oh! don't mind I want to warm my
|
||
hand, between your thighs, put your hand between mine,—there,—you've
|
||
just a little hair coming on your thing,—feel mine, it's like the hair
|
||
on your head, isn't it?—I am only twenty-five,—but when you are
|
||
twenty you will have as much Kitty. Your hand is cold, put it between
|
||
my thighs, we will warm each other there. What a nice little thing your
|
||
cunt is," said Betty feeling the little one's.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Soon the very first night they felt each other's flesh, Kitty wondering
|
||
at the cunt and hair of the grown woman, Betty thinking perhaps of what
|
||
I can only guess at. Kitty went to sleep with one hand between Betty's
|
||
thighs, and awaking in the night felt Betty again who was asleep and
|
||
snoring. She was a stout, big-built, fat-arsed, black-bristle-cunted
|
||
woman (that is from Kitty's description), but she must have been older
|
||
than she said, for the hair was thick and black in her armpits, and she
|
||
had slight hair on her lips besides.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Betty got more free next night. "You've a sweetheart, and you let him
|
||
feel this little thing,—the men call it cunt." Kitty said she had not,
|
||
and had not been felt. "I know better, you let him put his cock up it."
|
||
Kitty did not. "What never been fucked?—that is what men call it,—let
|
||
me feel." "No." Betty felt Kitty's cunt, and hurt her. "Well I don't
|
||
believe you have,—you are a stupid,—it's half the pleasure of
|
||
life,—feel my cunt,—give me your hand,—there your fingers are on
|
||
it,—oh! it don't hurt, you may feel right up."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty was overwhelmed and ashamed. "I did not like it, but yet I felt so
|
||
curious that I let my fingers go where she placed them, and I felt all
|
||
about her thing." "Cunt Kitty." "Well about her cunt."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
So gradually at night the elder led on the younger, by talking, feeling,
|
||
and telling the little one all she knew, explaining the pleasures of
|
||
fucking, the male mysteries, and male tastes and habits, although she
|
||
was what was called respectable, and worked hard for her living as
|
||
maid-of-all-work.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Betty pushed matters further. "I don't quite believe you are a
|
||
maid,—let me look,—would you not like to look at me?—show me yours,
|
||
I'll show you mine." Curiosity to see the cunt of a full-grown woman
|
||
took possession of Kit.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On Sunday Jim had a holiday, the shop was shut, Allwork cooked the
|
||
dinner, then the fishmonger had grog, and went to lie down, Betty went
|
||
up to clean herself, Kitty and the child went up with her then Kitty
|
||
showed her cunt, and Betty showed hers. "It was big, and such lots of
|
||
hair,—I'd never seen one before," said Kitty, "she pulled it open wide,
|
||
afterwards she pulled mine open, and we looked at each other over and
|
||
over again. I'd seen my little sister's and cousin's, and two or three
|
||
other gals' things, but they were all young; I'd never seen a big
|
||
woman's."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty getting bolder asked if she had ever let a man do it to her. Yes,
|
||
she had been married, and knew all about it. "You never had a child?"
|
||
"Never you little fool, there are lots of ways of stopping that,—oh!
|
||
I love it, I wish I had a nice young man with a big prick here.—I wish
|
||
you were a man." She took Kitty in her arms, and put her on the bed.
|
||
"There, lay still on your back, open your legs, and I'll show you how a
|
||
man gets on." Kitty did. Then she pulled Kitty on to her, and made her
|
||
play the man. "There, move,—push your cunt up against mine,—up and
|
||
down,—quick,—there, that's how the man moves when he is fucking till
|
||
he spends,—then Lord! ain't he quiet!"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Within a week the experienced woman talking to the girl about fucking,
|
||
had described its pleasures, explained its mysteries, acted and the mode
|
||
and manner of the doing, until Kitty felt wild to see, feel, and act it
|
||
for herself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't you ever frig yourself?" said Bet. "No." "You know what it is?"
|
||
"Yes." Betty told of the pleasure a finger could bring her, but Kitty
|
||
was not forward in sexual wants, and she had not frigged herself or
|
||
known sexual pleasure in her cunt up to that time, though she had
|
||
fingered herself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'll frig you," said she. Kitty objected, but the talk of prick, of the
|
||
delight of the male and female in feeling and rubbing each other upset
|
||
Kitty, who was growing older, and whose animalism was perhaps rampant
|
||
that night. She left a lovely sensation all over her as Bet rubbed her
|
||
cunt, and she spent. Betty then took Kit's fingers, and rubbed her own
|
||
cunt. "What with <i>your</i> fingers?" "Yes Kitty's fingers," and rubbed them
|
||
on her clitoris, and frigged herself with them, Kit supposed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
That same night alying sleepless under the excitement of the novel
|
||
pleasure whilst Allwork snored, Kitty frigged herself. The next night
|
||
they frigged together. Betty said, "It's poor pleasure,—I likes a man,
|
||
and you'll like a chap,—some one will fancy you soon,—you let him do
|
||
it. When you have a great stiff cock up your cunt poking and poking,
|
||
and poking away,—oh! it's delicious, and you won't like frigging after
|
||
that."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night the fishmonger was out, Kitty put the child to bed (he had
|
||
the child to sleep in his bed usually). Bet and Kit were in the
|
||
shop-parlour, and Jim in the shop. Betty went down to the kitchen, Jim
|
||
soon afterwards told Kit to give an eye to the shop, and call him if
|
||
wanted, and down he went. Kitty who had been sharpened in three weeks,
|
||
who had seen Jim kissing Betty, and giving her funny pokes when he
|
||
thought no one was looking, went to the kitchen-stairs, and going down
|
||
a few steps slowly and peeping; saw Betty with her back up against the
|
||
wall, Jim close up to her and his hands round her, and his bum moving in
|
||
a funny way. She knew they were fucking, and fearful of being detected
|
||
came softly into the shop again; but she made a noise. Up came Betty,
|
||
the Master came home, and told Betty to go to bed, and Jim to shut up.
|
||
Soon after Betty washed her cunt. That seems to have been an operation
|
||
that Kitty never had seen her perform excepting on Sundays. Kitty then
|
||
felt sure that she had caught Bet at the pleasant exercise, for she had
|
||
heard how something thick and white came out of the man's cock, and how
|
||
it was wise to wash the cunt out afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Betty seems to have been suspicious, for she began asking why she had
|
||
come down the stairs. To call Jim, a customer having come—but he had
|
||
gone away she replied. Betty was too clever to take that in. Did she see
|
||
her, she asked. Kitty had seen her and Jim standing close up in front of
|
||
her, "and he was moving about, and I told her," said Kitty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty on being pressed said she thought they were doing what Betty had
|
||
said men and women did. "Fucking me?" "Yes." He was doing nothing of the
|
||
sort, that she would swear; but they did it sometimes, for he was going
|
||
to marry her soon, and after making Kitty promise not to tell, they went
|
||
to sleep. "If you tell," said the knowing older one, "you will lose your
|
||
place."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Next night Betty said, "You be quiet, Jim is going to marry me soon,
|
||
only he don't wish it known, he is coming up when Master's asleep, and
|
||
going to lay down by the side of me,—you sham to be asleep." Kitty
|
||
remarked, "He can't lay here all night." No, when he had had his
|
||
pleasure he would go. Kitty had fear come over her, but promised, then
|
||
fell asleep, but awakened, and heard Jim say in a whisper, "She sleeps
|
||
like a top." Then was a rustling and rumpling about, and Jim cried, "Oh!
|
||
cunt," Betty said, "hush!" they kissed, sighed, and Jim crept softly
|
||
away, Betty got out and washed her cunt in the dark, and found Kit was
|
||
awake.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This went on for several nights, Betty had oiled the lock and hinges of
|
||
the door, and when she heard the Master go up to bed, would softly open
|
||
the door, and leave it ajar. When Jim had emptied his ballocks he would
|
||
leave and close the door gently, Bet would light the candle, and wash
|
||
her cunt. One night she said to Kitty, "Come and see the stuff that
|
||
comes out of a man's prick." Kitty jumped out of bed, saw the seminal
|
||
sediment that Betty had washed out of her, and stood looking at Jim's
|
||
spendings at the bottom of the wash-stand basin. "Look how thick it is,"
|
||
said Bet. "We have no thick stuff, have we?" Then she felt it. "You are
|
||
a beast," said Kit. "Wait till you have a sweetheart," said Bet.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Why," said I to Kit, "I asked you before if you had seen any one frig,
|
||
and you said only your cousin." "Yes," replied she, "my cousin Grace,
|
||
you didn't ask me about any one else, but I did see a young man once do
|
||
it to himself," added Kitty, "it was my cousin Bob."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I made her tell me all about that. She had cousins male and female, one
|
||
named Grace her friend, and a cousin Bob, who used to go and see them;
|
||
he was a favorite of Kitty's mother, a lad of sixteen, a carpenter.
|
||
Grace must have been about a year older than Kitty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty's parents lived in two rooms, and had the right to use a
|
||
wash-house. I am sure from all she said they were steady working-people.
|
||
The mother went out sometimes charring, leaving Kitty at home to mind
|
||
the children. She was useful at home, mended and made their linen. Grace
|
||
often used to help her at needle-work.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Before Kit went to the fishmonger's she was at home one day mending, and
|
||
Grace with her. Grace was always talking about what she knew, and had
|
||
frigged herself before Kit. Kit had tried to frig, but got nothing but
|
||
a pleasant sort of feeling, nothing approaching the luscious crisis that
|
||
she felt when Betty tried her middle-finger on her clitoris.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A knock at the door. "Who is there?" "Bob." Kitty had been forbidden
|
||
under pain of having her ears boxed, to let Bob or any one else in when
|
||
her parents were out. "You can't come in," she cried. "Let's in for a
|
||
minute, I've got something to tell you." "Tell me through the door." "No
|
||
they will hear upstairs." "No." Bob began rapping a tune with his fists
|
||
on the door. Grace said, "The lodgers will tell your mother." Bob who
|
||
seems to have been a little fresh said, "Oh! won't you be sorry," and
|
||
tramped downstairs.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A noise outside. "Why there he is again." "Is that you Bob?" No reply.
|
||
"See if it's some one else." There was a shuffling outside. Grace got
|
||
up and cautiously opened the door peeping. A big foot was thrust in, and
|
||
she couldn't close it, then pushing the door wide open, and himself into
|
||
the room comes Bob. Probably with the instinct of what might follow Kit
|
||
had thrust the two children into the bed-room. Females are strange and
|
||
cunning animals; even at an early age, cunt is always ready, always
|
||
inciting, and preparing them for cock; knowing or unknowingly, whether
|
||
for intrigue, or objectless, or for the delight of doing what is
|
||
forbidden; cunt is always inciting the female to help the male, for
|
||
"cock and cunt must come together," as poor Fred said.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Bob was making a half-holiday, had had enough beer to elevate him, and
|
||
was of an age at which a prick has a habit of getting inconveniently
|
||
stiff. If you can't afford to pay for cunt, or don't know a cunt which
|
||
will take you up it for love, your prick is a restless article, which
|
||
will insist on the buttocks pushing it somewhere or somehow, till the
|
||
stiffness is taken out of it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A frisky youth with restless cods was in the room with two girls, one of
|
||
whom was also frisky, and the younger inquisitive. They got joking, he
|
||
kissed them, they tickled him, till he threw himself on the floor, and
|
||
rolled about as the girls tormented him, and thought they were getting
|
||
the best of him. He suddenly caught hold of them both, pulled them on to
|
||
the floor in a heap, one on the top of him one by his side, and holding
|
||
one one way, and the second another way, managed to put his hand on to
|
||
one's cunt, turned the other over, and lifting up her clothes slapped
|
||
her naked backside; they struggling and crying out at the attack on
|
||
their sacred privates, he fighting, overturning, and exposing the limbs
|
||
of the lasses, until, as Kitty said, "he's seed all we'd got to be seen
|
||
over and over again."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This quieted Kitty and Grace. When released they called him a
|
||
blackguard, and told him to go out of their room. "I'll tell my mother,"
|
||
said Kitty. "Tell her," said Bob, "tell her you saw this," pulling out a
|
||
stiff prick, "as stiff as yours," said Kitty, who was laying at the side
|
||
of the bed feeling my cock about whilst telling me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"We turned away, then turned round, it was still out, he had got it in
|
||
his hand, and was grinning. Grace said, 'Let's go to the children',
|
||
and burst out laughing, so did I, because she did." Kitty stopped her,
|
||
saying, "Don't let the children see him, they may tell mother." After a
|
||
time they turned round again, the fascination of the prick was on them,
|
||
both wanted to see it. Grace winked at Kitty. "Go away Bob," said Grace,
|
||
"you'll get Kitty's ears boxed if it's known you have come in." "Don't
|
||
care," said Bob, "show me your cunts, and I will. Cocky, cunty, cocky,
|
||
cunty," he sang out, "look here,—come and feel it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I don't know what you mean," said Grace turning round again. (Kitty
|
||
said that Grace told her afterwards she wanted to see as much of his
|
||
thing as she could.) "Show us the crack between your thighs." "You
|
||
beast, I've a good mind to hit you," said Grace. "Come on," said he.
|
||
"You go." "Feel my prick first." "I won't." "You Kitty." "I won't you
|
||
beast." "But," said she, "I was curious like to feel it for all I said
|
||
'no' to him, and so was Grace."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Bob ran at Grace, and catching her, pulled up her clothes, and felt her;
|
||
then running after Kit, he did the same, the whole three were yelling,
|
||
Bob with his prick out promising to go if they felt him, they frightened
|
||
of the mother coming home.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They were much agitated now, the children in the bed-room were crying
|
||
at the row, and both girls threatening to call the lodger upstairs.
|
||
"Let me," said he, "let me put my cock just on your naked thighs,—do,
|
||
—do,—do,—only for a minute." "Shan't you beast." "Oh! I must do it,"
|
||
said Bob, "I must,—hooo," and then sitting down on a chair, Bob
|
||
closed his eyes, frigged away, and saying, "Oh! it ought to be in your
|
||
ck—ck—cunt," spent, the two girls looking at him and at the sperm
|
||
jetting out on to the floor.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They stood looking, never uttered a word, and fear came over them lest
|
||
Kitty's mother should come home, and catch him there with his cock out,
|
||
and his sperm on the floor. "Go, there is a good young man,—mother will
|
||
be home directly,—oh! that's her footstep,—run upstairs, and wait till
|
||
she's in." Bob whose nervous system was I dare say a little shaken by
|
||
his frig, buttoned up his trowsers, and ran out of the room. The girls
|
||
locked the door and listened,—it was not the mother, then they began to
|
||
talk.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"That's it on the floor,—that's what comes out of a man's cock when he
|
||
puts it up a woman's thing," said Grace,—"it's that which gets a woman
|
||
in the family way,—it's that which gives them both pleasure when they
|
||
do it together, when <i>his</i> thing is up <i>her</i> thing."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Grace told all she knew, that when her mother was "lying in," she once
|
||
peeped through a key-hole, and saw her father frig himself. They talked
|
||
of the pleasure they had heard it gave the woman to have that warm
|
||
injection up her. Grace frigged herself, Kitty tried but got no
|
||
pleasure, they sat opposite each other on chairs, Bob's spunk still on
|
||
the floor. That was the only time she had ever seen spunk till she
|
||
saw Jim's in the wash-hand basin. "Should you like to see mine Kitty?"
|
||
"Shouldn't I!" said she. "You shall some day,"—and one day she frigged
|
||
me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kitty was quite artless when she told me this, she had taken a liking to
|
||
me, though I did not then know it, and was delighted to tell me all, it
|
||
seemed quite a relief to her to do so. She had never spoken to any one
|
||
else about it. To a man? she should think not,—it was not likely, and
|
||
though I asked her often and often about it at times she never varied
|
||
the account. I believed it implicitly, and that is why I narrate it
|
||
here.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Several nights Jim served Betty so, till one night Kitty sneezed. "The
|
||
girl's awake," said Jim. "Who is that?" said Kitty shamming, though she
|
||
knew full well. "It's Jim,—you won't tell, will you?" said Betty. "I
|
||
have told her you are going to marry me,—have I not Kit?" Jim went on
|
||
tailing his mistress, but now that he knew Kit was awake he put out his
|
||
hand and felt Kitty's bum whilst fucking. "Did you tell Betty that?"
|
||
said I. "No," said Kit laughing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Next night Betty who seems to have taken delight in debauching Kit, made
|
||
her feel Jim's prick, she pulled her hand to it. "I thought I liked to
|
||
feel, but I shammed that I did not." "Was it big?" "It seemed bigger
|
||
than yours, but I didn't see it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This went on for a fortnight or so, Kitty feeling always afraid that
|
||
they would be found out, and so it came to pass. Illicit fucking in a
|
||
house not your own is sure to bring trouble.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The Mistress' sister came to nurse her, and slept in her room. Betty
|
||
said the sister gave a lot of trouble, and was always poking her nose
|
||
where she had not business to poke it. Jim did not come up for one or
|
||
two nights, he had heard some one moving either in the Master's, or
|
||
in the sick woman's room. Kitty was glad of it. Jim I suppose at last
|
||
randied out of his prudence one night, and Betty reckless for want of
|
||
fucking, told him to come, and up he came. Then a violent knock at the
|
||
door came just as he was fucking Betty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Who is that?" "Me." "Wait a minute sir." "Open it, or I will break the
|
||
door open." "Wait sir, I'm not dressed." In came the door with a crash.
|
||
Jim was just by the bed, Kitty standing by Betty, for both got up.
|
||
At the door was the Master and his sister-in-law. "You damned whoring
|
||
bitch," said the Master to Betty, "at day-light out you go from my
|
||
house."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The sister-in-law turned down the bed, looked at it, and then at Kitty.
|
||
"Please Maam it's no fault of mine," said Kit. "You dirty little hussy,
|
||
why did you not tell what was going on,—your father shall hear of
|
||
this." "Dress yourself," said the fishmonger to Betty. "Leave them alone
|
||
till the morning," said the sister-in-law,"—and both left the room. Jim
|
||
half-dressed, without speaking a word, had crept downstairs whilst the
|
||
talk was going on. The Master did not speak to him at all.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"They will sack us both," said Betty. Kitty began to cry. "You are a
|
||
fool, there are lots of places. I hope old Vinegar-Chops liked the look
|
||
of it," said Betty lifting up the towel (there were the drippings from
|
||
Betty's cunt on it),—"I dare say the sour-faced beast knows what it
|
||
is,—-don't you cry, you will get a living if your father does turn you
|
||
out, any girl can so long as she has a good face, and something warm
|
||
between her thighs." That was Betty's comfort to Kitty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After breakfast the Master put Betty outside the door, Kitty's mother
|
||
was sent for, who boxed her ears all the way home, and the father
|
||
knocked her down when he came home. "If I thought you'd turn a whore,"
|
||
said he, "I'd murder you." She told her mother the truth entirely, but
|
||
only got her ears boxed still more,—she should have told her Master,
|
||
the mother said. After this she was again kept at home, a short time
|
||
after her father died, her mother changed her quarters, keeping her
|
||
indoors to take care of the children, and had no idea that her daughter
|
||
was getting fucked to enable her to buy sausage-rolls, as well as for
|
||
the pleasure of having a male.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0006"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER VI.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Sausage-rolls, and consequences.—Kitty's home.—The little
|
||
ones.—A saucy cabman.—Catamenia.—Fucking economies.—
|
||
Changing money.—Pol and the bargee.—Kit implicated.—A
|
||
black eye and bruised rump.—-A little boy's cock.—
|
||
Preparation for travel.—'Kit's regret.—Bessie in tears.—
|
||
Amusements abroad.—Home again.—Kitty a strumpet.—An
|
||
evening at B.w Street.—Kitty's eight months doings.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One day I took some sausage-rolls to the baudy house, she clawed hold
|
||
of one directly. "Ain't they prime!" said she, and never ceased till
|
||
she had finished them all—such a lot,—then she turned pale. "I must go
|
||
home," she said. "Why?" She began putting on her things. "What is your
|
||
hurry?" "I can't wait." "Are you ill?" "Yes,—yes,—I must go." "Then I
|
||
won't pay you." "I'm not well." "How,—you want to go to the privy!" "I
|
||
do," said the girl hanging her head. I rang the bell, told the woman to
|
||
show the lass where to ease herself. When she came back I could not
|
||
get her to look me in the face, and thinking of her operation gave me
|
||
a distaste for her that day, so I let her go without doing anything.
|
||
Ridiculous that of course, but I tell things just as they occurred.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When it rained, and she could not meet me, how angry she was. "If I buy
|
||
an umbrella mother will wonder where I got it." Once she nearly got wet
|
||
through, and I did not see her that time, because I did not expect her
|
||
to be out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She told me where she lived, and I arranged that if it rained I would go
|
||
to the front of the house in a cab. I did that once only, and the cabman
|
||
insolently demanded about five times his fare when I got down at E——r
|
||
Street, saying I had enticed a young girl into the cab. "Yer haught to
|
||
be glad to be let orf with ten bob," said cabby, "think yerself lucky a
|
||
peeler don't drop on you for taking a young gal like that,—yah! you're
|
||
a swell, ain't yer?—yah!—yah!—poop!"—and off he drove.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She began to deplore her poor dress, bought a pair of white stockings,
|
||
and I kept them for her, because she was afraid of taking them home.
|
||
"Oh! ain't I kept under," said she, "I hate it,—I have a good mind to
|
||
bolt." "Then you will turn gay." "Well I would like to dress nice, and
|
||
do as I like, instead of minding children and working." I persuaded her
|
||
not.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Have you had no other man but me for the last two months?" "Only one,"
|
||
she said, "but I'm never out if it rains, and I can't get out of nights
|
||
cause of mother, and I wash and mend,—so how can I?" "I'll go and ask
|
||
for some one else at your room, to see if you're in or not." "Do,—if I
|
||
don't open the door, mother will, on Monday I'll take the brats into the
|
||
Waterloo road for a walk." She did, and I saw her. How short her clothes
|
||
were! a carman as he passed stooped down, and gave her legs a pinch. Her
|
||
mother was at home.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl grew fast, each week she seemed bigger than the week
|
||
previously, the sausage-rolls agreed with her, the hair on her cunt
|
||
lengthened,—she was so pleased when I remarked it,—her desire was to
|
||
have as much hair on her quim as Betty had. Then she began to get heavy,
|
||
dull, and drooping. One day I had her on the side of the bed, just for
|
||
variety sake, for sometimes I found it delightful to see my prick up to
|
||
its roots in her, and the next instant its tip. Her cunt felt very wet,
|
||
looking at my half-uncunted prick it was covered with blood. I pulled
|
||
it out, a red stream followed running all over her chemise. I had never
|
||
seen such a sight before when fucking, and only once I think since,
|
||
though I have poked women in that state.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What is the matter?" said I startled for the moment, "you're poorly?"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh!" cried out the girl, "I must go to mother,—ohl let me go." I tried
|
||
to comfort her, she took no notice of me, but dressed and ran out of the
|
||
house quickly, white with terror and without her money. That night I
|
||
had Brighton Bessie, and told her about it. Bessie said the dirty little
|
||
bitch ought to be flogged by the hangman; if she had her way all such
|
||
young bitches should be sent to prison, and the men who had them ought
|
||
to be punished as well.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Kit's first poorliness had come on, that accounted for her dullness, she
|
||
had no idea of what was taking place in her, her mother had not warned
|
||
her. Of course, the girl knew of the ailment common to her sex, but
|
||
her monthlies had taken her by surprise. I never knew a girl more
|
||
unaffectedly modest than Kitty was the next time she met me after her
|
||
accident, as we called it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Said she one day, "Give me a sovereign for this silver (savings out of
|
||
the money I had given her), I don't know where to put it, it jingles in
|
||
my pocket,—I am afraid of dropping it, and mother finding it out."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She had put it in a crack between the skirting and the inside of a
|
||
cupboard lining as near as I could make out, until it was a pound's
|
||
worth. "What a pity I can't buy some nice clothes, is it not?" said she.
|
||
Poor Kitty was amusing, but I saw she was brewing mischief after she had
|
||
had her monthlies, or was what she called "a full woman." Several times
|
||
as she took my money she said it was no good to her, as she could only
|
||
buy things to eat. She was getting restless. When I told her I should be
|
||
in the Strand one day, if it were not wet. "Oh! do come, if it's wet or
|
||
not,—I <i>will</i> meet you." "But your mother?" "Don't care,—if she says
|
||
anything I'll tell her I'll run away."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Said she one day, "Hasn't Pol got it? her mother has nearly murdered
|
||
her,—oh! Lor she is bruised all over." Then she told me that the little
|
||
dark girl I had had was caught in the privy with a man,—"oh! such a big
|
||
un, he is much taller than you,—she was standing on the privy-seat with
|
||
her legs wide open, and he was trying to do it to her." The mother had
|
||
suspected, had the little imp watched, and caught the man in the
|
||
act. "How he could do it I don't know," said Kit, "but he is a
|
||
bargeman,—such a big man!—and the little beast stood on the privy-seat
|
||
too." Kitty was scandalized at that.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was some days before I saw her again, then she was slovenly and had a
|
||
black eye, and began to cry. "It's mother," she sobbed, "look here." She
|
||
pulled off her things, and showed me wales and bruises. "Mother did it,"
|
||
said she sobbing, "my bottom's bruised,—she held me down, and hit me
|
||
with a brush,—look," said Kitty turning up her lily-white arse for me
|
||
to see.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Her young friend who had not long before had my prick up her cunt, and
|
||
then the bargeman's, had sought to excuse herself by saying Kitty was as
|
||
bad. Mother told mother, Kitty was battered by her mother, and had been
|
||
locked up, there had been row after row, till Kitty would not eat, nor
|
||
wash, nor mend,—she fought her mother, she threatened to run away, and
|
||
to turn gay. Said the mother, "Your father always said you would, he
|
||
would turn round in his grave if he knew what you are saying.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I made my brother's cock stiff," said she one day as she was playing
|
||
what we called cherry-bob with my prick, i.e. taking the tip in her
|
||
mouth when it was limp, and shooting it out again, just as you see
|
||
children do with cherries. "Your little brother?" "Yes,—I washed him,
|
||
pulled it backwards and forwards, as if I were washing him, so that he
|
||
should not know what I was about." "Did it get stiff?" "Quite, and he
|
||
seemed to like it," said she, "he asked me to go on doing it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
During all this time I had occasionally seen Bessie, for a youthful
|
||
cunt never did give me full physical enjoyment, nor fetch me like a
|
||
full-grown one, although as an occasional letch it was delicious. After
|
||
her monthlies had arranged themselves I fancied Kitty was more luscious,
|
||
and her discharge more copious, yet I often used to think of the
|
||
spanking posteriors and full crisp-haired cunt of Bessie whilst
|
||
operating on Kit. A light-haired quim I also never liked, it was the
|
||
artlessness, frankness, and freshness of Kitty which kept me to her so
|
||
long.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was going abroad. When I told Kitty this she broke into tears. "Oh!
|
||
what shall I do!—don't go," said she. The little lass was fond of me;
|
||
a thing I never had dreamed of. She promised me to go to service, and
|
||
leave off fucking; but she never did.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I told Bessie, and she began to cry, and said, "It's always the
|
||
way,—directly I like a man I lose him." I thought she was shamming, but
|
||
the last night I had her, she would take no money, said if I gave it to
|
||
her, she would throw it into the streets.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Glad to be from England, alone,—alone, I hoped to be sent to———,
|
||
but got no further than———. There I had women enough. All women
|
||
there were examined by medical men weekly, just as they are at———,
|
||
and many a fine Spanish woman, and coarse but well-built English woman
|
||
I had for half-a-crown a piece. I was recalled after seven months, and
|
||
within a few days was in the Strand, but saw no Kitty until one night in
|
||
early Summer. "Oh! it's you,—I'm so glad," said a female. It was Kitty,
|
||
delighted. I did not know her for the instant, but in ten minutes we
|
||
were fucking. How glad she was to see me; she was a well grown young
|
||
woman, and lovely, her breasts were well developed, her calves and bum
|
||
as well, although she was not seventeen.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She had quarrelled with her mother, left, and set up as harlot. It
|
||
was wonderful what harlotry had done in giving her taste in dress,
|
||
deportment, style of walking, and even in language. She had learned the
|
||
value of her cunt, it was no longer three and six, but twenty shillings.
|
||
"I don't want <i>your</i> money," said she, "let's talk of old times." We
|
||
spent several evenings together. One man almost kept her, she thought he
|
||
was going to keep her altogether, and hoped so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had taken her to the house in B.w Street, quietly there we talked all
|
||
things over; we laughed over the affair of Pol and the coal-heaver, the
|
||
sausage-rolls, the lost ten shillings, the afternoon her poorliness came
|
||
on. "So you are gay,—do you like the life?" She really did, got lots of
|
||
money, and now kept her mother who had been disabled by rheumatic fever.
|
||
I saw her daily for a week or two afterwards, and we fucked to our
|
||
hearts' content. Her motte was delicately hairy now, and of dark golden
|
||
colour, slightly brownish. Then I went to the sea-side. When I came back
|
||
to London, looking for her everywhere, I could not find her, and though
|
||
I longed for her very much, was obliged to render myself happy with
|
||
others.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To complete her history I must go forward two or three years when I had
|
||
been madly in love with a gay woman as I shall tell, but had quarrelled
|
||
with her for presuming on my love, and resolutely abstained from seeing
|
||
her, doing however great violence to my affection and inclination. I
|
||
used to go to the baudy house in J...s Street (not yet mentioned), and
|
||
cry to its Mistress who would ask me to let her send to the lady of my
|
||
affection (Miss M...s),—but of this more presently.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After reading over this part of my narrative relating to Kitty written
|
||
full thirty years ago, I add these few words.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
My secret life was written for my own pleasure, and to be a narrative of
|
||
what I myself saw and did, and nothing else. I have pretty well adhered
|
||
to that, but my fun with Kitty took place within a few years after I
|
||
began to write, and describe the amatory episodes as leisure inclined
|
||
me, and as they seemed to me unusually amusing or illustrative. I
|
||
arranged them in order afterwards. Nothing at that time had been so
|
||
piquant in my acquaintance with harlots as Kitty's had been. I had
|
||
not then had much to do with lasses as young as she was, the novelty
|
||
therefore I suppose made me write out her narrative intermixed with my
|
||
own, at the length it has reached.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Besides Kitty was really quite original, her freshness, frankness, and
|
||
truthfulness impressed me much, and after much experience since in the
|
||
ways of frail ones, I believe now that what she told me was mainly true,
|
||
and am sure she was delighted to get a confident in me, to whom she
|
||
could unbosom herself unreservedly.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0007"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER VII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Brighton Bessie.—Change irresistable.—Bessie in quod.—
|
||
Lewd effects.—Spooning.—Her home.—Her cabman.—
|
||
Reflexions.—Two years after.—Five years later on.—The
|
||
mouse's promenade.—Bessie disappears.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I met in the Strand one night Bessie, who put her arms round me. I
|
||
repulsed her, she saw her mistake, and followed me to a baudy house.
|
||
Inside she began kissing me excitedly, and said she was so glad to see
|
||
me back, that she did not know what she was about. It was not our usual
|
||
house, I was in a hurry, so after I had fucked her was going away. "What
|
||
one fuck only!—you have not had me for a year nearly,—I'm damned
|
||
if you go till you have given me another,—that dear old prick, I've
|
||
thought of it fifty times when I have been poked." So I fucked her
|
||
again, and afterwards resumed seeing her, for she was much to my taste
|
||
sexually. I had many voluptuous amusements with her which she liked and
|
||
invited, although I have no recollection of playing any of those curious
|
||
erotic tricks which gratified me later on in life, nice attitudes being
|
||
then for the most part enough for me. My balls were running over with
|
||
sperm in those days, and if I could control myself for a few minutes
|
||
when my prick was stiff, it was as much as I could do. Bessie was
|
||
full-blooded, and loved to take her fucking with me, kissing me
|
||
furiously as her pleasure came on. We used again to pass hours at the
|
||
house in B.w Street, reading, drinking, talking, and copulating at
|
||
intervals.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Yet I went after other women for all that, for fresh cunt was
|
||
irresistable. Once when I had been away I missed her for a few days,
|
||
then I saw her coming out of a public-house. "Oh! I'm so glad,—I've
|
||
been locked up,—it's a damned shame," she cried out, "I was marched off
|
||
without having said a word by a police-man,—blast him!—and all because
|
||
I would not let the bugger fuck me one night up in ——— Street,—I'd
|
||
never let a policeman touch me,—damn them all." She spoke loud to a man
|
||
and two or three sympathizing women, a mob began to gather round her, so
|
||
noisy was she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I turned as quickly as I could up a side-street, she following me. "Oh!
|
||
come my dear, come,—how glad I am to see you,—I did nothing but think
|
||
of you whilst I was locked up,—oh! God I'm dying for a fuck,—a whole
|
||
fortnight I've not had it, and I did nothing but think of you when I
|
||
frigged myself." There was a roar of laughter from half-a-dozen women
|
||
who had followed her. "Shut up," said some one. "Ain't she a letting
|
||
out!" said another. "Ain't you ashamed of yourself?" said a third. "It's
|
||
one of her men," said another. "She is a nice woman," said some one
|
||
else. "It was a damned shame," said another. "I know him," said a voice,
|
||
"he wants every woman in the Strand, and if he don't get them he walks
|
||
them off." "Yes the bugger." "She is just out." "Yes, and he quodded
|
||
Mary Summers last night." "And he is a married man with a large
|
||
family,"—and so on. I felt overwhelmed, and inclined to run away. She
|
||
turned into the first house which had a door open, and I was glad when
|
||
the friendly red-curtained door closed behind me, she galloping upstairs
|
||
in front of me, showing her fat calves. I followed Bessie into a
|
||
bed-room.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Five shillings," said the woman to me. "It's all right,—you go,—he's
|
||
an old friend of mine,—don't bother," said Bessie pushing the servant
|
||
out of the room, and slamming tie door, then throwing her bonnet on
|
||
a chair she caught hold of me, gluing her lips to mine, feeling at my
|
||
trowsers front she cried out, "Let's fuck,—come and fuck me,—I'm dying
|
||
for you,—a fuck from you,—oh! put your prick up." She had got it out,
|
||
threw herself on the bed opening her thighs wide, and showing her cuntal
|
||
beauties, calling on me to fuck her. I mounted her immediately, it was
|
||
impossible to withstand her randy impetuousity; contagious lewdness
|
||
coursed through my veins.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! my God," said she as my prick drove home, "I'm coming,—oh!
|
||
my God,—fuck,—fuck,—oh! I'm spending,—oh! my
|
||
darling,—fuck,—spend,—oh!—oooh!" I never had a woman in a higher
|
||
state of randiness, she would not let me go till I had fully eased her
|
||
passions, she lavished expressions of love and tenderness on me. "Don't
|
||
pull it out,—there dear, there,—lay still on me, I'll keep it up, it
|
||
will be stiff again,—there it's stiff now." I stopped with her some
|
||
hours. A policeman on the beat she said, had taken a fancy to her, had
|
||
asked her to let him do it to her up against the dark wall at the back
|
||
of E.... r H.. l. She would not, he threatened, still she refused, so he
|
||
took her to the station one night on the plea of her annoying gentlemen,
|
||
and the magistrate gave her a fortnight in prison. She had come out that
|
||
very day, and was rather tight.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
In a few weeks Bessie got more and more friendly. I was the first to
|
||
leave, and she to ask what was my hurry. When I thought I had been
|
||
detaining her too long for my moderate compliment, she would say, "Oh!
|
||
never mind, I'll make ten shillings do,—I'm not in debt,—before the
|
||
theatres are over I dare say I'll get engaged." It was impossible to
|
||
avoid seeing she was getting affectionate. She would sit or lay talking,
|
||
feeling, or kissing me for hours, whilst her expressions of pleasure
|
||
when I was stirring up her vitals equalled those of any woman who has
|
||
ever loved me or enjoyed my embraces.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night I was charged twice for the room, for stopping long, and
|
||
said something about not being able to afford it. That brought forth a
|
||
proposition, one of the most curious I ever had in my life.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Said she, "It's a lot of money to spend on the rooms,—come to my rooms;
|
||
they would be too humble for you, but they are clean and nice,—drop me
|
||
a line, and I will always be at home,—and you would be more comfortable
|
||
than at these houses, and have nothing to pay." Then after hesitation,
|
||
and as if reflecting, she said she lived in the New North road where she
|
||
had either a small house or rooms in one, I don't quite recollect which.
|
||
"It's paid for by a friend of mine, he gives me ten shillings a week.
|
||
Now don't think little of me because I tell you this,—he is only a
|
||
cabman, he sleeps with me nearly always, he's a nice clean, steady man,
|
||
and behaves well to me; but I don't like him since I've known you. You
|
||
can come when you like, and sleep with me when you like,—I'll give
|
||
him up, he shall never come near me again, and I'll always be there for
|
||
you,—you will see what a large comfortable bed I've got,—but you must
|
||
pay for the rooms, I must feel sure of a roof over me,—I don't care
|
||
about anything else,—then you can see me when you like, give me what
|
||
you like,—nothing if you have not got it,—I don't want your money,
|
||
I'll get that as I now do."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She said all this in a humble way looking at me, tears half filled her
|
||
eyes, her tone was sad; it was in its way a clear but simple declaration
|
||
of affection for me. I saw it, felt it, but shunned it; for a strange
|
||
dislike to a gay woman loving me came over me, some sort of undefined
|
||
idea that I should be a species of fancy-man, a man whom I always
|
||
thought at that time was a baudy house bully; and the offer of Bessie
|
||
oppressed me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I told her she was very kind, that I appreciated it, but it was a long
|
||
way off,—I would not think of it,—I did not wish her to give up a
|
||
friend for me,—that there were obstacles to my accepting which I could
|
||
not tell her of, and so on. I scarcely knew what to say in refusing
|
||
without wounding her feelings.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I am sorry I told you, for you won't think as much of me as you
|
||
did,—it's the simple truth,—you don't believe me?—only come up and
|
||
see me." But I could not then think of displacing a cabman, I did not
|
||
even like to think of my prick having taken its pleasure in the cunt
|
||
which had wriggled the prick of a cabman. My experience in life might
|
||
have told me, had I thought about it, that the possibility was that my
|
||
prick might have rubbed up the same channel that a burglar's had. I
|
||
only saw that I was asked to displace a common man in the affection of
|
||
a street-doxy, I appreciated the affection which prompted the offer of
|
||
exchange, felt gratified and sorry at the same time, especially when I
|
||
saw tears in the poor woman's eyes.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I again said I would if it were not such a long way off, but perhaps I
|
||
would, and so on. I never did go to her house, but saw her from time to
|
||
time, until I fell madly in love with a lady of pleasure and would have
|
||
given almost my life for her to have loved me. So Bessie was avenged,
|
||
for I had fallen in love with a doxy after all.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When this infatuation occurred I ceased seeing Bessie. Then in my
|
||
trouble a year or two afterwards I sought her again, and told her my
|
||
trouble. "Ah! you would not love me when I was fond of you, but you love
|
||
her, and she plays on it,—don't you let her fool you," said Bessie,
|
||
"she has got a man,—all you give her he will get, I know it from what
|
||
you tell me." Bessie was right, but Sarah after a time as I shall tell,
|
||
did not deceive me about the matter.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I missed Bessie for a year or two, then found her again in the
|
||
Strand, she was much altered. "I don't think I ever liked a man to fuck
|
||
me as I do you," said she one night as she enjoyed me, "if you had but
|
||
come up to my little home you would have saved me a lot of trouble." But
|
||
I could not get out of her what she meant by that.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Full five years afterwards, when roaming about not far from the
|
||
Haymarket one night I met her, and scarcely knew her. She stopped short,
|
||
"You Bessie!" "Ah! yes it's Brighton Bessie, but I'm sadly altered, sure
|
||
enough." "And you knew me?" "Know you!—I should know you by your eyes,
|
||
if I saw nothing more of your face but your eyes,—I should know you to
|
||
the last day of your life," said she. She was always talking about my
|
||
eyes. She had seen me several times, but had not dared to accost me she
|
||
said. I told her she always might.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I took her to what had become my favorite baudy house. It was a hot
|
||
night, and we fucked on the sofa. She had become flabby, and said she
|
||
had ill health, but I could glean nothing from her about her career,
|
||
excepting that for some years she had not been gay. We stripped naked,
|
||
and had just finished fucking her on the sofa when I felt something
|
||
running over my legs, bum and back over my shoulder, on to hers. It was
|
||
instantaneous. Then I saw a mouse which had run over us, and went fast
|
||
up the wall into some red curtains where it was lost,—it made her
|
||
shudder, and me too. That is one of the odd events by which I shall
|
||
always recollect the last time I had Brighton Bessie. "You won't see me
|
||
again I dare say," said she in a plaintive tone, and a tear in her
|
||
eye as we parted. I said I dare say I should. "No you won't,—good bye
|
||
dear." With a sigh the poor woman left me, and I never saw her again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was whilst I was frequenting Bessie, and occasionally other doxies
|
||
that the following adventure occurred.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was frequently now at my mother's house, my brother was away, and both
|
||
my sisters married. I used to stop with her for days together, finding
|
||
that a relief from home misery, and also agreeable company to her, who
|
||
was now so much alone. I also at times stopped with one of my sisters
|
||
whose husband I liked; the other lived some distance from London.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0008"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER VIII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Washerwomen.—Matilda and Esther.—A peep over a wall.—
|
||
Eaves dropping.—A girl's wants.—Shaking a tooleywag.—A
|
||
promenade by a barrow.—Disclosures.—A snatch and a
|
||
scuffle.—An assignation.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I went to see my mother one day in Summer, and after luncheon walked
|
||
to the end of the garden often mentioned. At one side of it was a
|
||
road which gave access to a gentleman's house, and on the other to my
|
||
mother's. There the carriage-road stopped, and a foot-path began. At the
|
||
junction was a mews wide enough for a cart, which ran at the end of our
|
||
garden and those adjoining. Our entrance to it had been disused, <i>we</i>
|
||
having one in the side-wall opening on to the road, and the neighbours
|
||
rarely used their back-entrances. The mews was grass-grown. On the
|
||
opposite side to our garden-walls was the wall of very large grounds. A
|
||
gate not locked, formed of open bars was at the end of the mews next to
|
||
the road.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The footpath mentioned passed between walls of large gardens, and the
|
||
between fields, until it joined a road on the other side of which was
|
||
the village church-yard, through which the footway passage continued
|
||
till again a high-road intervened. This continuous footway formed
|
||
a short cut to a distant part of the parish. It was not much used
|
||
excepting on Sundays, and by lovers who walked there on summer nights. I
|
||
had found out years before that the mews at the back of our house was an
|
||
occasional pissing-place, it being round the corner, and out of sight.
|
||
I used to peep over the wall in hopes of seeing a female at that
|
||
operation, mounting to do so by the gardener's ladder. When I saw a
|
||
woman piddle it was great delight to me, but I more frequently saw men
|
||
whose cocks had no attraction for me. On Sunday nights after church, the
|
||
splash and rustle of petticoats could be heard, but not seen; the sight
|
||
was however rare at any time, for few people had the boldness to push
|
||
open the gate, and enter the mews.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I never saw copulation, the greatest fun I had was once seeing a female
|
||
bogging, who turned round and gathered two or three of the largest
|
||
leaves from the lime-trees in our gardens which overhung the wall, wiped
|
||
her arse with them, and left them sticking on the top of her turds; but
|
||
she never noticed a youth peeping just over her head. One reason why I
|
||
was never detected watching was that women always turned their bums to
|
||
our wall, and so I was at the back of them. Charlotte and I have both
|
||
looked over the wall.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The wall was mostly covered with our ivy, which fell down in thick
|
||
masses on the mews side; lime-trees at intervals completed the screen.
|
||
Any one peeping down from above could be sufficiently hidden if he
|
||
put his head carefully above the wall at places, and pushed aside the
|
||
boughs. On the day I speak of, I walked round the garden thinking of old
|
||
times, of how Charlotte and I used to see if the cook was talking to
|
||
the gardener before we began our amourous play, of the pranks Fred and
|
||
others played there, and all the occurrences of my youth, which had
|
||
taken place in the house and garden.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The gardener was away. I thought I would look over the wall; so placing
|
||
the ladder got up, and looking down saw two girls sitting on the handles
|
||
of a barrow on which were baskets filled with linen. One looked about
|
||
sixteen, the other a little older. It was a dreadfully hot day, the
|
||
barrow was at the angle of the mews. They were talking, and I moved the
|
||
ladder to get a place nearer to them and not to be seen; for to watch
|
||
and hear women who thought themselves unobserved and unheard, was always
|
||
a delight to me. If you ever hear two women talking on amorous subjects,
|
||
their disclosures you will find are always charming to a man.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At the angle of our garden, and just where the road joined the mews, a
|
||
large notice-board had been put up for some purpose since I had lived
|
||
there; it was just outside and higher than our wall. Between the back of
|
||
it and the wall was a space of a few inches. Our ivy had grown up it
|
||
at places, and filled up most of the space, but enough was left at
|
||
the angle to let me look down on the barrow which was just outside the
|
||
mews-gate, out of the way of what small traffic there was, the gate of
|
||
the mews being wide open. Then of all my eaves dropping I have never yet
|
||
heard anything so amusing as I did then. The air was solemnly quiet in
|
||
the hot summer's afternoon and though the girls spoke quite softly, I
|
||
heard them well.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I should like to feel what it is like," said the youngest whose face
|
||
was towards me. There was a mixture of fun, audacity, curiosity and
|
||
lewdness on that girl's face. "Hish! some one will hear you," and
|
||
something else I could not hear, said the other. "<i>Fuck</i>—there then,"
|
||
said the young one saucily and laughing. The older gave her a slap. "Now
|
||
you may take the things home alone,—I won't help." "If you don't I'll
|
||
tell mother." "Don't care." "Yes you do,—what did you say it
|
||
for?" "Didn't <i>you</i> say it?" "I didn't bawl it out you fool."
|
||
"<i>Fuck</i>,—there,—there," said the younger going off. "There it may stay
|
||
then," said the older angrily, and she moved also off round the corner.
|
||
They were both out of sight in a second, but I heard their voices
|
||
quarrelling, the barrow and clothes-baskets were unattended just outside
|
||
the mews-gate.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A labouring man came along in the opposite direction. Seeing the barrow
|
||
he stood and looked round in all directions, turned into the mews, and
|
||
I think he was going to steal, but thought better of it. I had peeped
|
||
quite round the board, but had dropped into the old place again, the
|
||
man turned to the wall, and pissed just under me, his head turned, and
|
||
looking at the clothes-baskets all the time, then he drew the foreskin
|
||
backwards and forwards when he had finished, till his prick was
|
||
standing, an article any man might have been proud of; he played
|
||
with it, and might have been going to frig himself had he not been
|
||
interrupted.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girls came back round the corner just then still wrangling, they
|
||
stopped as they came on the man, who turning round shook his tooleywag
|
||
at them, and moved out of sight, but not out of my hearing. "This is the
|
||
sort of thing that would please you," said he wagging it. "Go along you
|
||
beast, I'll call a policeman." "You wouldn't call out if it was up your
|
||
cunt,"—and he walked off laughing. The girls were quiet for an instant,
|
||
and then laughed. "Hish!" said one, "he is not gone." The other looked
|
||
round the corner, and said he had; then they laughed loudly.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Was it not big!" "Did you see it?" "Yes, and stiff,—ha—ha—ha."
|
||
"He—he—he." "It looked as if it would split any one," said the little
|
||
one who sat down on the barrow-handle again. "Sarah says the bigger it
|
||
is the better it is," said the other, and then they laughed. "Hush!"
|
||
said the bigger one, "some one may hear us." Turning her rump to the
|
||
wall she pissed just where the man had. The little one did the same,
|
||
then off they went, one trundling, the other holding the baskets steady.
|
||
They took the heavy work in turns I found.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I rushed to the house, then out, and followed the girls, a desire to
|
||
show them <i>my</i> prick was on me. As I followed my intentions cooled,
|
||
fearing they might tell a policeman. I had not the experience then that
|
||
I now have, or should have feared nothing of the sort, for girls tell
|
||
no one but each other if they see a man's prick. I overtook them in the
|
||
church-yard (they were resting again on the barrow-handles), and entered
|
||
into conversation with them, delighted at their demure faces, knowing
|
||
that they had just seen a prick, that one had said "fuck," and that
|
||
I had seen both piss. A notion of getting the younger one by herself
|
||
restrained me from blurting out what was in my mind, but my delight
|
||
really was in looking at, and talking with them, thinking that fucking
|
||
might and probably was in their mind at the moment I accosted them.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They were coarse, middle-sized, well-fed, sturdy-limbed, dark-eyed
|
||
wenches, unmistakeably sisters. Excepting for one being shorter than
|
||
the other you would scarcely have known there was a difference in their
|
||
ages; both had bare arms, one had her frock well pinned up behind over
|
||
her petticoats, both had short petticoats, thick ankles and strong
|
||
boots, a washerwoman was then not ashamed of showing what she was, and
|
||
they always wore dazzling white stockings,—and these girls did. I
|
||
asked where they lived, they answered readily. I knew the lane well, all
|
||
the washerwomen in the village were there.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
In my lewdness I forgot everything but the pleasure of speaking to the
|
||
girls. A middle-aged lady passed us accompanied by two or three very
|
||
young women, who stared hard at me. The barrow-girls stood up and
|
||
curtsied as they passed, and naming them. I knew them, and a few years
|
||
before had romped and played with the young ladies, then children.
|
||
The last time I had seen them there was not a hair on any one of their
|
||
cunts; I expect that now their cunts were full-wigged, and well frigged
|
||
into the bargain. They had recognized me, as I heard from my mother
|
||
afterwards, I did not recognize them, they having grown from children to
|
||
women. I was seated on the barrow-handle as they passed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"So you wash?" No, their mother did, they ironed, took home, and
|
||
fetched the things. What was their name?—would they meet me? and so on.
|
||
They would perhaps,—where did I live?—they did not know me. Getting
|
||
friendlier and friendlier I learned all about them, it was done in a
|
||
joking, chaffing way. I told them I lived far off, and was only on a
|
||
visit at a house close by.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They must go on really,—would I get up? No, unless they gave me a kiss.
|
||
I chivied one after the other, and caught and kissed both, they were
|
||
not difficult to catch. Then they trundled on the barrow, I walking with
|
||
them, the people we met (very few) staring at a dandy walking by the
|
||
side of two washgirls; but I took no heed then of any one who passed us,
|
||
nor cared.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We crossed the high-road into another part of the lane, and again we
|
||
stopped; more and more randy got I. "What do you think of, when you
|
||
iron the tail of a man's shirt?" "Nothing." "You know it wraps round
|
||
something different from that which a chemise does." "Does it?" said
|
||
the little one who had twice the cheek of the elder. "Yes,—it makes you
|
||
think when you iron them." No it did not,—what did I mean?—they did
|
||
not know in the least.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
(What delight some girls have in their randiness in declaring they
|
||
don't understand a man's baudy chaff, the "What do you mean?" "I don't
|
||
understand" are only incitements to the man to declare his meaning in
|
||
broad, strong, baudy words; and then it's, "Oh! oh! the beast!" but
|
||
their cunts tighten with a squeeze of lust, they go off and think of it
|
||
all, and perhaps frig themselves under the recollection. But this is a
|
||
reflection the result of matured experience, and was not written at the
|
||
time this part of my narrative was.)
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They turned up the high-road, and at their earnest request I fell
|
||
behind, they left the linen at a house, and brought back other baskets,
|
||
then I recommenced chaffing. When we were in the lane bounded on one
|
||
side by a wall, on the other by a ditch and corn-field. They stopped and
|
||
begged me to go, for so many people knew them on the road. Prudence told
|
||
me we had better separate, but my mind full of the idea of getting the
|
||
younger girl, I asked them to have a drink. No,—they would be seen.
|
||
Would they meet me? Yes. When? They could not say,—but I had their
|
||
address.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I am not clear why, but up till then I had not said what I had heard and
|
||
seen, but I kept it to myself, although dying to let it out. I again sat
|
||
at the edge of the barrow, and refused to get up till they both kissed
|
||
me. They could not go without the barrow, and after a little sham I
|
||
kissed them both. Then the devil took all control off of me, and as I
|
||
kissed one I felt outside her till she wriggled away from me. This in
|
||
the open lane.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Now," said she, "Mr. Impudence, I've a good mind to slap your head for
|
||
doing of that." "I'm sure you liked it,"—and I went towards her. She
|
||
ran ahead, and took up a stone. "I'll heave this at you," said she
|
||
looking as if she meant it. I desisted, and went back to the barrow,
|
||
"What's he done?" said the sister who had been standing a little
|
||
distance off. "I'll tell you bye and bye,—come on." The younger began to
|
||
handle the barrow, but I sat down on a handle, some one came along. "You
|
||
will do us harm," said one of the girls.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Tell your sister what I did." "Shan't,—get up." I then, forgetful of
|
||
my intention, blurted all out, imitating their voice and manner.
|
||
"Fuck,—hish! some one will hear,"—a slap. "Fuck,—there then."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The younger stood like a statue, her mouth opened wide, her lower jaw
|
||
almost seemed dropping off; the elder stared at me, her eyes nearly
|
||
out of her head. "Sarah says the bigger it is the better she likes it."
|
||
Their faces got blood-red, they stared at each other, then one said, "I
|
||
wish you'd get up, and let me have my barrow."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I saw you both piddle," then I looked up and down the lane in both
|
||
directions, I was bursting. "Look," said I pulling out my prick, "it's
|
||
as thick and stiff as his, isn't it?" No one was in sight still.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I wish there was a policeman," said the elder, "oh! you beast,—we'll
|
||
tell the police." One appeared just then in the lane, but the girls
|
||
appeared to be in no hurry to tell him, but I rose, they wheeled off the
|
||
barrow as fast as they could, I walking with them. I was a little afraid
|
||
of the policeman.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We had got to a spot where the lane was crossed by a village-road in
|
||
which were many good houses. "Oh! pray leave us, we go down here, we
|
||
have customers in the road." "Will you meet me?" "Yes,—but don't follow
|
||
us." I did not want to be seen, so we parted, after some arrangements
|
||
about meeting.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0009"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER IX.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Returning home.—In the church-yard.—Two female laborers.—
|
||
Among the tombs.—A sudden piss.—An arse on the weeds.—
|
||
Torn trowsers, and a turd.—In front of the public-house.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They went off, I crossed the road into the churchyard, through its
|
||
posts at the entrance to prevent cattle passing, and over which with
|
||
difficulty the girls had got their barrow and baskets. It was a huge
|
||
churchyard, half of it mere field; at one end the rich were buried,
|
||
and there were rows of tombs and monuments, the rest was only partially
|
||
filled with tomb-stones of all sizes. As I entered it two women passed
|
||
me; they were tall, stout, and dusty, had very short petticoats, and
|
||
thick hob-nailed boots, dark-blue dresses hung over big haunches, little
|
||
black shawls no larger than handkerchiefs over their backs. They had
|
||
big black bonnets cocked right upon the tops of their heads, and seemed
|
||
women who worked out of doors, agricultural laborers perhaps, or perhaps
|
||
the wives of bargemen, for there was a canal through the village. They
|
||
had the strong steady walk, and the body well balanced from the hips
|
||
that you see in woman engaged in outdoor occupations; perhaps they
|
||
carried strawberries to the London markets in large baskets on their
|
||
heads, and they walked as firmly as soldiers.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They went past me towards the monuments, both looked at me, and they
|
||
quickened their pace as they went off. I was dying with want of a fuck.
|
||
"They are going to piss," I thought. I knew the spot. We when boys,
|
||
and I when a youth years before, had laid in wait to see nursemaids and
|
||
their little charges turn up among the tombs to ease themselves, so I
|
||
stopped and looked after them.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They heard my footsteps cease, turned round, looked at me, and walked on
|
||
again. I followed slowly, they walked slower, so did I; they stopped,
|
||
so did I; one turned round. "Well young man, what do you want following
|
||
us?" This abashed me for the instant, but my prick standing gave me
|
||
confidence.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You are going to piddle, and so am I." They burst out laughing, then
|
||
checked themselves, and one said, "Well I'm blessed if you ain't well
|
||
cheeked young man." "Arn't you?" "It's no business of yourn what we're a
|
||
going to do,—go your way, and we'll go ours." "I'll piddle by the
|
||
side of you,—I like doing it where a woman does it," I replied. I was
|
||
baudily reckless now.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'm damned!—did you ever hear such cheek!—go on young man,—or let
|
||
us." On they went, I followed; they stopped, so did I; they muttered
|
||
together half-laughing, and turning their heads round every minute,—and
|
||
I went on chaffing about piddling.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
They had got to a spot where there was a break in the row of tombs, and
|
||
a length of turf with grass a foot high, burnt up, and almost made hay
|
||
in the sum-mer sun. "I'd give each of you a shilling to piss before me",
|
||
said I. They had turned into this cross-passage between the tombs, and
|
||
one could see them from the footpath through the church-yard.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! Lord," said one before I had got the words out of my mouth, "I
|
||
can't wait",—and squatting she began pissing whilst I made my offer,
|
||
and laughing said, "Well if ever I heard the like,—well young man,
|
||
give it,—I'll never be paid again for getting rid of my water, I'll
|
||
bet,—you do it Sarah." Sarah said, "I shan't." "Don't be a fool, take
|
||
his bob." The other looked at me, the splash of the other woman's piddle
|
||
fell on her ear. When any one wants to piss, and hears another doing it,
|
||
the desire to piss becomes strong. Down Sarah squatted laughing, and her
|
||
splash began, before the other had finished pissing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I wanted to piss, but the rigidity of my prick prevented me; it wanted
|
||
to evacuate its sperm before it got rid of the thinner liquid. I pulled
|
||
it out in front of their faces as they squatted side by side, stiff and
|
||
red-tipped; it throbbed, and knocked up and down in its randiness under
|
||
every effort I made to turn on the water. One said I was a blackguard.
|
||
"I want a fuck so bad,—let me have you,—I'll give you five shillings."
|
||
To which of the two I don't know, for I had no choice, one cunt was as
|
||
good as another to me at that moment, and I pushed my prick towards one
|
||
of them, who laughing put it aside with her hand.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"There is a chance for you," said one to the other (they were both up
|
||
then). "What do you take me for young man?" said the other, "if my man
|
||
were here he'd knock your bloody head off." But both stood looking at
|
||
my prick and me. I kept on asking, and offering the money,—no one would
|
||
see us,—one could watch,—and so on.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Do you live about here?" said one. "No, I am going to see a friend at
|
||
———" (naming a place about two miles off.) "Weren't you never up here
|
||
before?" "Never in my life,—here is your shilling,"—and I gave it her.
|
||
"Here is yours." She would not take it. "Take it Molly." She took it.
|
||
"Oh! let me have you," said I selecting that one now for my addresses.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"This is a bloody lark," said she, "<i>what do you take</i> us for young
|
||
man?" "Let me fuck you." Both stood still looking at me and my prick.
|
||
"Some one will catch us," said one moving out from the tombs, and
|
||
looking up and down the pathway to see if any one was near, and
|
||
then came back. I had got close to the other. "Now Molly," said one
|
||
anxiously, "what are you about?" "Oh! he's made me all overish." "Well
|
||
if you'd been three months away from your old man as I have, there would
|
||
be some excuse." "Never mind,—you won't blab,—you stand there, and
|
||
call if you see any one." "The grave-digger will catch you." "No I saw
|
||
him right over by the church." "Come away." "No,—you go and watch." And
|
||
so we talked for a few seconds, but I never put my prick out of sight.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Well," said the other moving out of sight into the narrow path between
|
||
the monuments, "you'll get into a mess." "No I shan't,—I'll let him for
|
||
the lark of the thing."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The instant she had gone round the corner the selected one laid hold of
|
||
my prick. "Do it quick,—some one may come," said she as she grasped it.
|
||
"Lie down". "No I won't,—it's dirty." "No it's dry,—the grass is quite
|
||
hay." I stripped off my coat, made it into a bundle, and placed it for
|
||
her head. "There,—there," I said, and pulled her down. She made no
|
||
resistance. I saw white thighs and belly, black hair on her cunt; and
|
||
the next minute I was spending up her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Shove on," said she, "I was just coming,"—and she was wriggling and
|
||
heaving, "go on." I could always go on pushing after a spend in those
|
||
days, my prick would not lose its stiffness for minutes afterwards; so I
|
||
pushed till I thought of doing her a second time; but her pleasure came
|
||
on, her cunt contracted, and with the usual wriggle and sigh she was
|
||
over, and there were we laying in copulation, with the dead all around
|
||
us; another living creature might that moment have been begotten, in its
|
||
turn to eat, drink, fuck, die, be buried and rot. Suddenly she jerked up
|
||
her arse, and pushed me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh!" said she uncunting me, "there is some one,"—and up she jumped.
|
||
There stood the other woman. "How you frightened me," said she. "There
|
||
was no one coming,—well it's a rum afternoon's job this," said she.
|
||
"Don't you blab." "Not I."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had hidden my prick, but now my bladder insisted on its requirements
|
||
being attended to, and I went to the spot which the two ladies had
|
||
moistened, and pissed on it. The woman who had watched us fucking had
|
||
dark eyes, she had looked at me without ceasing from the time I had got
|
||
off from the other, and began pissing. My prick nearly at fucking size
|
||
still, was pouring forth a copious stream whilst I was feeling its
|
||
stem which the moisture from the other's cunt had saturated. Seeing
|
||
her looking I pulled out balls and all, and finished by shaking my
|
||
tooleywag. She laughed a low laugh. "I feel all overish myself now."
|
||
Her eyes looked like fire at me, fierce, lewd. "I'll give <i>you</i> five
|
||
shillings,—let me fuck <i>you</i> too,—she will wait and watch for us."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh!—o!" said the one whom I just had fucked, twitching about, and
|
||
suddenly pulling up her petticoats, and looking up them, "there is
|
||
something crawling up me." She felt up her petticoats, shaking them, and
|
||
flourishing them about. "Oh!—oh!—just lift them up, and look Sarah."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Her companion lifted her clothes. "Go away young man, you've had your
|
||
game I think." "Oh! not there,—oh! it's biting." "Don't make that
|
||
noise." "Oh! it's here,—there,—just there." Slowly the companion
|
||
lifted the petticoats, first one side, then the other, showing thighs
|
||
and rump, and a great ugly crawling black thing dropped; it had crawled
|
||
up her petticoats whilst she was lying on the ground. I had drawn near,
|
||
and was gloating over the display of charms. "Ain't he had a treat
|
||
Molly!" said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This sight finished me by making me as stiff as I had been five minutes
|
||
before; the other one still kept looking at me. "I'll give <i>you</i> five
|
||
shillings," said I. "I've a good mind" said she. "Lor let him,—who'll
|
||
know?" "How stiff it is!" "Let him." "Feel it," said I. The woman put
|
||
her hand on it. "I'll go and watch," said the other moving away. "I
|
||
shan't." "Don't be a fool,"—and she moved out of sight, leaving us two
|
||
alone.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Not a word more was said, I pushed her up against the upright railings
|
||
enclosing a monument; a slight stone-lodge going all round the monument
|
||
put her about an inch above me, I lifted her clothes, for an instant
|
||
only saw another dark-haired cunt, and drove my prick up it. She felt
|
||
pleasure the very first shove that I gave her. "Oh!—oh!—did she do it
|
||
with you?—did she spend?" she gasped in whispers, looking me full in
|
||
the face. "Yes she spent."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
That fetched her. "Oh! I'm coming,—oh! it's a coming," she gasped, and
|
||
laid her head over my shoulder. I felt her bum and belly wagging, and a
|
||
perfect torrent of cunt-liquor ran down on to my balls. I had not long
|
||
began my fuck, so was slower than with the first woman, and had fetched
|
||
her a second time before I had finished her standing up against the
|
||
railings. Then we stood, pressing our bellies together, keeping our
|
||
genitals coupled, and looking in each other's faces without speaking,
|
||
one or two minutes.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You don't know these parts?" said she whilst we still were coupled.
|
||
"I've never been here in my life before," I replied. "How hard your bum
|
||
is,—are you married?" "Yes." "Is she?" "No,—let me go, she is coming."
|
||
Down flopped my tool, and down fell her petticoats.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The first-fucked came round the corner, then we talked. I had given the
|
||
first woman her five shillings directly after I had done her, and before
|
||
she found the reptile in her petticoats; I forgot to pay the other.
|
||
"Well young man, you've made a pair of us go crooked," said one. "Aye
|
||
that he have,—we've played high jinks." "Give us a kiss," said one. I
|
||
kissed them both, and off they walked. "Hulloh!" said I, "I forgot the
|
||
five shillings." "Lord so had I," said my creditor,—and I gave it her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't come our way, the grave-digger knows us,—go straight across
|
||
there, and round the church." I watched them going along with their
|
||
steady step; who could have known from their look and manner, that both
|
||
had just been fucked! Who can tell the state of any woman's cunt, whom
|
||
you may meet anywhere!
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I went to my mother's, the hair on my prick was gummed flat on my belly
|
||
and balls, I found I had torn a hole in the knee of my trowsers, and a
|
||
lump of turd was sticking to my coat, that I had made her a pillow with,
|
||
the ground must have been hard and flinty, and some one had shit in the
|
||
high grass.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
What were the women?—certainly not gay. Did they fuck with me for fun,
|
||
for letch, or for money? I often have thought of it, and came to the
|
||
conclusion that both were lewd, that my baudy suggestions made them
|
||
worse, my prick upset them, and the money finished it; but that wanting
|
||
a fuck was the main cause; that one whose old man had been away three
|
||
months, how she looked at me and at my doodle, after I had fucked the
|
||
first one!
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Towards dusk I went to meet my washerwomen. Near the corner of the lane
|
||
in which they lived was an old-fashioned public-house well back from the
|
||
road, in front of it were two large elm-trees, beneath them seats where
|
||
poor people sat drinking and enjoying themselves in Summer. I stopped
|
||
and looked. Quite at the back sat the two women whom I had fucked; they
|
||
had pewter pots in front of them, and recognized me at once. Both got
|
||
up, and rushed inside the public-house rapidly. Funk was on their faces,
|
||
they seemed to struggle who should get inside the door first. I never
|
||
saw them afterwards, but at the sight of them my cock stood rigidly, and
|
||
I would have had them again had it been possible. Many a time since I
|
||
have been to that churchyard to look at the place among the tombs where
|
||
we three had our pleasures, and my prick always stiffened when I was
|
||
there. Such impromptu copulations have a wonderful charm.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0010"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER X.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
The washerwoman's lane.—An intention frustrated.—A slap in
|
||
the face.—Choice language and temper.—A dinner in the
|
||
Haymarket.—The rocking-chair.—A lucky shove.—Up, and out
|
||
in a second.—A quarrel, and flight.—An enticing laugh.—
|
||
The house in O... d. Street.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Down the lane was the washerwoman's cottage, it had a little garden in
|
||
front of it. Through the window I saw the girls ironing by candle-light,
|
||
I walked about till quite dark, then knocked at the door. The short one
|
||
opened it, and seeing me shut the door saying, "Oh! you musn't call." So
|
||
I went away.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I wrote asking them to meet me, and got no reply; but I persevered.
|
||
I was constantly thinking of the girls' baudy talk when sitting on the
|
||
barrow. I went to the house again, after writing to say when I would be
|
||
at the end of the lane, and found them standing there,—by accident they
|
||
said, they declared they had not had my letter. That was a lie I knew. I
|
||
began smutty talk, which they cut short by both going to their cottage.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I wrote letters to the short one again, asking her to meet me, but
|
||
nothing came of that. At the end of their lane were market-gardens, I
|
||
saw Esther one evening at that end which joined the high-road, and was
|
||
close to the public-house where I had seen the women sitting whom I had
|
||
poked in the village church-yard. It was dark. I asked her to come for a
|
||
walk, she promised in a few minutes to come to me by the market-garden.
|
||
"If I don't," said she, "it will be because mother is at the door." But
|
||
she came.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I swore I was in love with her, which was true to the extent of her
|
||
cunt, and wanted her to meet me elsewhere,—we would dine, and go to the
|
||
theatre together. No she could not be out late without a row. I kissed
|
||
her, which she took to in the darkness kindly enough. I whispered, "I
|
||
should like to fuck." "If you say that again," said she, "I'll slap your
|
||
chops." I did, and she gave me a slap in the face, and ran off. I was
|
||
hurt, and so annoyed, that I did not follow her, but bawled out, "You'll
|
||
split your cunt into your arse-hole if you run like that." Directly
|
||
afterwards a voice like as of an oldish female in the darkness said,
|
||
"Get along you drunken blackguard, the likes of you ought to be locked
|
||
up." Insulting the girl by foul-mouthed remarks had not improved I
|
||
feared my chance of broaching her, and for a while I desisted.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But the letch was strong on me, I went to stay with my mother to
|
||
be nearer my game, and passed my time in playing billiards at the
|
||
public-house, and nightly I hunted the girl; so that at length under
|
||
promise to take her to Vauxhall she agreed to come and dine with me, or
|
||
as she said, have supper at eight o'clock with me. I usually then went
|
||
to Vauxhall at ten o'clock.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I went to a French restaurant in the Haymarket, ordered a sitting and
|
||
bed-room, and a good supper. Thought I, "With a feast and champagne with
|
||
you by myself for a couple of hours, my cock and your cunt will make
|
||
acquaintance."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To my annoyance she came with her sister. "I could not stop out late
|
||
without her," said she. I made the best of it, though very angry on the
|
||
quiet at seeing my game baulked.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'll kiss you at once because you have brought your sister unasked, and
|
||
you Matilda because you came unasked,"—and I kissed both to my heart's
|
||
content. They liked it. They were dressed in the vulgarest style of
|
||
their class, and I felt ashamed of going to Vauxhall with them,—and did
|
||
not they gorge! Champagne they had never tasted before and they lapped
|
||
it up like milk. "It gets into your head, don't it?" said one. "No my
|
||
dear, champagne gets into your tail,—you'll want to piddle soon."
|
||
"Oh! for shame!" "Never mind there are plenty of chamber-pots in the
|
||
bed-room." "If you talk that way we'll go," said they laughing, but we
|
||
went on talking and drinking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Supper over, the waiter out of the room, both girls half-screwed,
|
||
half-screwed myself and wholly lewd, they both came and sat by me on the
|
||
sofa. Sisters again,—what fatality!
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The conversation was soon suggestive. Which did they like best, washing
|
||
a shirt or a chemise? They let out, checked themselves, checked each
|
||
other. "Lord Esther what <i>are</i> you saying?" "Well Matilda I'm ashamed
|
||
of you." "Well that's pretty conversation for a gentleman,—let's
|
||
go,—promise you won't say anything like it again." "I won't,—but tell
|
||
me one thing,—how did you feel Esther, when you sat on the barrow and
|
||
said, '<i>fuck</i>'?" "You're a blackguard, I never said anything of the
|
||
sort,—did I Matilda?" "We'll go if you keep on so."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Matilda got jealous. "It's my turn now," said she after I had been
|
||
kissing Esther. The wine got more into all our heads, and we laughed
|
||
and shouted. "Why did you come Matilda?" "Mother don't let Esther out
|
||
alone,—besides I didn't know what you two might be up to alone." "What
|
||
did you think we might be up to?" "Oh! that's tellings." This talk went
|
||
on for a time, gradually getting warmer and more suggestive; all were
|
||
thinking about fucking, though no one said so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
By the sofa was an American rocking-chair, the first I ever recollect
|
||
having seen. Matilda began rocking herself in it, I rocked the chair
|
||
violently for her and then as far as it would go, back and held it
|
||
there, then rapidly I pushed one hand up her petticoats. Her legs were
|
||
distended somewhat as legs usually are when people are rocking, and my
|
||
fingers went on to her cunt. She lay back for the moment, helpless, then
|
||
managed to close her legs, but being almost on her back she could not
|
||
get free; she struggled to get up, and yelled out, "Oh! pull him off
|
||
Esther,—-don't you beast."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Esther was on the sofa. She got up, pulled me back, and the chair came
|
||
forwards, but not till I had lifted Matilda's clothes far above her
|
||
knees. She sulked, my blood was up, and pulling Esther down on the sofa
|
||
kissing her, I pushed my hand up her clothes, and on to <i>her</i> cunt. She
|
||
screeched, then Matilda pulled me away. There had been much laughing and
|
||
yelling, but now they sulked. "We will go," said they. "I've felt both
|
||
your cunts," said I.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Their bonnets were in the bed-room, and I would not let them get them,
|
||
put both fingers to my mouth, and kissed them saying, "That's touched
|
||
your cunt Matilda, that's touched yours Esther." Then I pulled out my
|
||
prick, and putting both fingers on it's tip said, "That's nearly the
|
||
same as if my prick had touched your cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Call the waiter Esther," said Matilda angrily. I had gone too far, so
|
||
I desisted, begged pardon, promised never to do it again, to give them
|
||
both new bonnets, and I dare say anything else, and they sat down, but
|
||
for a long time sulking, and almost silent.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But my humility and regrets overcame them, there was more chatting, more
|
||
laughing, more champagne. I got smutty again and now, they laughed at
|
||
it. "What nice legs, and what beautiful white linen you have Matilda."
|
||
"Mine is as white," said Esther. "Your legs are not as plump." "Yes they
|
||
are." I pinched their arms, then their legs, we all kissed, they were
|
||
both as randy as the devil, and incited me to smutty talk, though
|
||
affecting not to understand me. Then the champagne overcame us all.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You want to piddle?" "Ooh!—oh! no." "Really? then you want to see
|
||
if your bonnets are all right, that's all,—I want to piddle though."
|
||
Saying that I went into the bed-room, pissed, and came back, taking the
|
||
key out of the door. Laughing the girls then went into the bed-room, and
|
||
closed the door. They were very noisy, and groggy, the eldest worse than
|
||
the other.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I listened at the door. "Lock the door Ess." "There's no key." "Stand
|
||
there, and hold it,—I'm bursting." "Don't he go on!—make haste, or
|
||
I'll pee myself." I pushed open the door suddenly, one was pushing her
|
||
clothes against her quim to dry it, the other on the pot, she let a loud
|
||
fart just as I opened the door. "Oh!" said she rising with difficulty.
|
||
"I'll wait till the music is over," said I going out,—but I returned
|
||
the next minute, and pulled out my prick again. "I'll fuck you both,"
|
||
said I, and tried to put my hands up their clothes; when I got one the
|
||
other pulled me off, then I turned to her, and so on. We upset chairs,
|
||
we shreiked with laughter, it was Bedlam broke loose. I caught Matilda,
|
||
and threw her on her back on the bed. "Leave off now,—pull him away
|
||
Essie,—you're a going on too far,—oh! don't tickle,—oh! I can't bear
|
||
tickling." But I kept on.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The tickling made her screech. I threw up her clothes, for she was still
|
||
on her back on the bed, I didn't see her cunt, for I was between her
|
||
legs, and bent over her, lifted her legs, and pressed hard down on
|
||
her belly, her clothes on it which met mine, I gave a shove, having no
|
||
thought of doing anything but lewd mimickry of the act of copulation,
|
||
whilst Esther was tugging at my coat. Matilda shrieked, for my prick
|
||
went up her cunt, and out again before I knew where it was,—another
|
||
furious shriek. Frightened I had let go of her, she rolled off the bed,
|
||
and sat on the chair maudlin, and crying.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What's the matter?" said Esther, "what's he done?" "Oh!" sobbed
|
||
Matilda, "where's my bonnet?—let's go,—I will go." "Stay,—be quiet."
|
||
"I won't,—I will go." The waiter just then came into the room begging
|
||
us not to make so much noise, as people were noticing it. Matilda crying
|
||
and angry, Esther questioning, Matilda telling Esther to put on her
|
||
things, or she would go without her, whilst there stood the French
|
||
waiter and a chamber-maid, wondering what the row was all about,—if
|
||
they had not heard, and did not guess it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girls were frightened, and I could not stop them. They had their
|
||
things on, and were out of the house in a few minutes, I went down with
|
||
them saying we would go to Vauxhall. The landlord stopped me. "Your bill
|
||
sir." I paid it, and when I got out could see the two girls nowhere. I
|
||
took a cab, drove here, there, and everywhere, but they were gone.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I came back towards the Haymarket, took the first woman I met, and went
|
||
to a house in C... d. n Street. Half-an-hour afterwards I went with
|
||
another; whilst with her I heard a merry-voiced woman in an adjoining
|
||
room, and without seeing her took a fancy to her. I dismissed my second
|
||
woman after fucking her, and enquired of the servant how long the lady
|
||
who was laughing had been in the adjoining room. She knew nothing, so I
|
||
waited door ajar, till I saw the woman leave, followed, and brought her
|
||
back, fucked her, and had not enough money to pay for riding home.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The more I think of that adventure the more extraordinary it seems; from
|
||
the time I threw Matilda on to the bed, till my prick had entered her
|
||
cunt, and got out again, I don't believe it could have occupied more
|
||
than a few seconds. She was heavy, I only just could lift her, and her
|
||
petticoats seemed but half-way up. She laughed loudly as I did so, and
|
||
when I leant over her with my prick out, I had not the remotest idea of
|
||
broaching her, nor that my prick might touch even her thighs; but she
|
||
must have been in the exact position, and her struggles brought her
|
||
notch down to the level, and my prick by mere chance drove a little way
|
||
up the hole; then her bum-wriggle threw me out instantly, and her yell
|
||
frightened me. Whether she was a virgin or not, or whether I hurt her
|
||
or not, I cannot say; could not even swear that my prick had entered her
|
||
cunt, but it felt like it; and why did she yell, then sulk, and go away
|
||
in a temper, if I had not somehow touched that slippery orifice?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0011"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XL.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Esther meets me.—Vauxhall.—Ex-harlot Sarah.—Esther
|
||
succumbs.—Big-arsed and bandy-legged.—Periodic fucking.—
|
||
Matilda invincible.—I part with Esther.—Her fortune.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I wrote to Esther, who met me in the lane, she was in her airs. I
|
||
had quite forgotten myself she said, and had made them both drunk
|
||
purposely,—it was not like a gentleman,—I had acted very improper; she
|
||
would not recollect where my hand had been did not believe I had felt
|
||
her thighs, she was tipsy. That was the line the cunning jade took in a
|
||
dark lane. "Now don't be foolish, and run away when I tell you." "Well
|
||
I won't." Then I said something suggestive, and she got cosy with me.
|
||
"What was it you really did to Tilda?" "Nothing." "You did." "Ask her,"
|
||
"She won't tell me, and she will never speak with you again." Truthfully
|
||
or not Esther declared she did not know what I had done to make her
|
||
sister holler out so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'll give you a bonnet, and we will go to Vauxhall,—don't let your
|
||
sister know." I gave her the money, she agreed to meet me again, and
|
||
did, and again asked me what I had done to her sister. I would tell some
|
||
night when I slept with her. Then she would never know, for she would
|
||
never be in bed with me, or any one else, till she was married.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I progressed in the usual way, praised her big bum, guessed she had
|
||
fat thighs, etc. "You know I did feel them." No, she did not recollect.
|
||
After talking thus one night my prick was in stiffish form, and I put
|
||
her hand round it. She laid hold of it innocently, then snatched her
|
||
hand away violently. Then I did the old, old trick, promised a pair
|
||
of garters, if she would let me put them on,—in the dark of course.
|
||
"No,—no." "So help me God, I won't do more than put them on." Two
|
||
minutes after that my finger was on her split. This was all in the dark
|
||
lane.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I wonder what a girl of that class thinks of, hopes, expects when she
|
||
meets a gentleman on the sly. Does she expect he will fall in love, and
|
||
marry her?—does she know that he wants to fuck her?—does she like to
|
||
meet a man who has that intention, and long to hear smutty suggestions,
|
||
and baudy talk?—does she like the lustful feeling creeping over her,
|
||
as she stands by a randy man who is making lewd remarks? I imagine that
|
||
like the man, she is randy and wants to hear his baudy talk, to feel his
|
||
lips on hers, to hug him, to feel his hand wandering about her hidden
|
||
parts, that she meets him really for that purpose, just as much as he
|
||
meets her for the purpose. But they differ in this: he means to get her
|
||
if possible; she has made up her mind that whatever she may permit, he
|
||
shan't fuck her,—but she generally makes a mistake in that.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We went to Vauxhall, she told her mother she was going to the theatre
|
||
with Sarah and her husband (the woman who had said the bigger it was the
|
||
nicer it was), I was to take her to Sarah's when Vauxhall was over. I
|
||
gave her a lobster and champagne supper, she got spoony, I talked baudy,
|
||
she said it was abominable, this was all the Gardens. At length her
|
||
modesty broke. "Don't you want to piddle?" "I really do bad," said she
|
||
without hesitation. I took her to the ladies' place, and soon we left.
|
||
There were nice little houses not far from Vauxhall. I had been in the
|
||
afternoon, and paid for a room for the night to be sure of it, and took
|
||
her there. She would not go in till I said it was only to have another
|
||
glass of wine; but I believe she guessed what she was going in for. Then
|
||
I persuaded her to stop all night, the woman of the house was to call
|
||
us at six o'clock, so that she might get home early. She had made up her
|
||
mind to consent, and had no sham about it. I undressed her, tore my own
|
||
things off, threw myself on her, and with the first shove or two had
|
||
finished her virginity,—my prick went up with little difficulty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We fucked all night, I revelled in her cunt. She was healthy,
|
||
full-blooded, randy-arsed, and spent like fun; we did it several times
|
||
before sleeping, then in the night, and awakened about eleven o'clock
|
||
next day. "Oh! my God," said she, "what will mother say,—I'm ruined."
|
||
"Well it's no use crying, you are in for it." A few tears, then a fuck,
|
||
a piddle, a wash,—and then refreshed we go through the ceremony, of
|
||
inspecting privates, and so fucking, looking, smelling, frigging, and
|
||
finger-stinking we lay till devilish hungry. Then we got up, and after
|
||
going to a chop-house and having food, I put her into a cab to go home.
|
||
I enjoyed myself much that night, a fresh cunt is always charming, and
|
||
there is such delight in killing modesty in a woman who has never been
|
||
fucked before; the struggle to get her to open her thighs to let you see
|
||
her cunt is in itself a delicious treat.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On the bed spunk lay in all directions, and over her chemise as well,
|
||
and there was the least smear of blood. I had pushed through something
|
||
tight to get into her, but it was an easy business, so easy that I
|
||
thought she had had cock before; but she was large cunted, the very
|
||
jagged, ragged tear was full size; her cunt-hair was dark, her bum was
|
||
one of the biggest for her height I have seen, it was out of proportion.
|
||
Her privates did not fascinate me, and when I had had her two or three
|
||
dozen times I grew tired of her. She was also bandy-legged, a thing I
|
||
never could bear in a woman.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She went to Sarah's that day, and remained there, her mother sent to
|
||
know why. Sarah said that Esther had had bowel attack after they came
|
||
home from the theatre, and her mother then went to see her. A girl
|
||
always looks ill after her first poking, and Esther had been fucked out,
|
||
so her mother was taken in. Her sister Matilda said she did not believe
|
||
it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Sarah I found had been gay, and said she now was married; they did not
|
||
believe that, though they kept their disbelief to themselves, and only
|
||
Esther knew she had been gay, although all knew she had run away from
|
||
home. Sarah got her living by washing for Esther's mother. I heard some
|
||
funny things about her afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I could not get Esther to stop out again all night, but she met me often
|
||
enough, and became a baudy little bitch whose cunt much wanted feeding.
|
||
She told me the awful state of mind she and her sister were in at my
|
||
first overhearing them with the barrow; they had been talking of fucking
|
||
all that day, Sarah had begun it. Taking hold of some linen, "Oh! my,"
|
||
she said, "look here, ain't they been a doing it!—-here is
|
||
waste." There was spunk on the linen. I heard a good deal of choice
|
||
washerwoman's talk from Esther afterwards, and found that it was not an
|
||
unusual thing for laundresses to joke about the semen they found on the
|
||
linen of their customers, and that if they found suspicious signs on
|
||
the man's linen, to give the lady of the house a hint to look after
|
||
her husband. Many a husband has I am sure been discovered to have had
|
||
illicit pleasure, or to have the ladies' favor through the hints of an
|
||
officious laundress.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I made Esther liberal presents, but didn't take her much to Vauxhall or
|
||
theatres, although she was constantly asking me to do so. I had taken
|
||
her to Vauxhall one night after I had first had her, and saw some one
|
||
there whom I should have been sorry to have seen me with Esther. We went
|
||
to the little snug, quiet accommodation house which had been the scene
|
||
of the slaughter of her virginity, and there fucked; sometimes we
|
||
walked instead of riding home, and when near the village, turning down
|
||
a secluded street, or lane, I set her back up against a fence, and had
|
||
her; then with her cunt buttered home she went alone. I took her once or
|
||
twice to the theatre, and for fear of being seen had a box; but I could
|
||
not afford those extravagances. Although not a bad-looking girl, and one
|
||
who would stir up sensations in a man's ballocks when he looked at her,
|
||
she was vulgar in appearance; and neither bonnets nor dress made any
|
||
improvement in her,—she was a washerwoman all over.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After she was well acquainted with two or three baudy houses I grew
|
||
tired of her, and quarrelled with her. One night I went to my mother's
|
||
who was ill; and as I passed the end of the lane where Esther lived saw
|
||
one or two young men and women larking. She and her sister sometimes
|
||
came to the end of the lane when their work was done, to see the people
|
||
going along the high-road, and to chat there with neighbours. The men
|
||
were chivying the girls, and Esther was one of them. I watched them from
|
||
a safe distance, heard laughing and screeching, and every now and then
|
||
one of the girls chased by a man darted down the dark lane, and I heard
|
||
a shriek. There was no light in the lane, and not much even in the
|
||
high-road from the feeble oil-lamps. I thought also that I saw Esther
|
||
kissed, she yelled and got away, but it seemed to me she much liked it.
|
||
For some reason all the wenches suddenly disappeared, and the men,
|
||
who were of the laboring class, leaned against the railings of the
|
||
public-house, and talked. I walked slowly by them, and heard one say,
|
||
"I felt her cunt the other night, so help me Gor." I did not know who he
|
||
spoke of, but I made up my mind it was Esther.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I wrote Esther to meet me, and then told her she had let a man feel her
|
||
cunt, and what I had seen and heard. She denied all cheekily, but got
|
||
confused when I told her what the man said. "I was in the lane," said I
|
||
afterwards, "and quite towards that end where I have felt you often,—I
|
||
hid, and I know he was feeling you there." It was a bare-faced lie of
|
||
mine, because I had gone away; but it was a hit. "He didn't," said she,
|
||
"though he tried." "I heard him say you felt his prick," said I lying
|
||
away again, "he went up the lane, and told that tall young man that, 'so
|
||
help his God', you had." "He wanted to make me, but I didn't,—he is
|
||
the greatest liar in the place. It was sneaking of you to be hiding like
|
||
that, and watching me," said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I wanted to fuck her, but she would not let me. She slanged me, said
|
||
I had deceived her, had said I would keep her, and lots of other
|
||
things,—and off she went. I took no notice for a fortnight, then went
|
||
to the lodgings of Sarah, and had a talk with her. Sarah said that
|
||
Esther was mad with me for not writing nor going to see her, and blamed
|
||
me for not "behaving handsome". "No other man has ever touched Esther,"
|
||
said she, "you don't seem to care about her,—but there's plenty who
|
||
do,—there are two or three gents about who would be glad to be in your
|
||
place."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had her again, then had a desire to get into her sister, and tried
|
||
several times to see Matilda, caught her standing with Esther in the
|
||
lane once or twice, but she bolted off directly I went up to her. Once
|
||
she opened the door to me at her cottage, and slammed it in my face.
|
||
I had not told Esther what had made Matilda cry out till that day,
|
||
and then I did. "It's a lie," said she, "you went up my sister
|
||
Matilda?—what a crammer!" "She might tell her sister," and she did.
|
||
Matilda said I was a liar, and that what I had done was to shove my
|
||
finger violently up her, and hurt her very much. Esther believed
|
||
her sister. Matilda was going to be married to the potman at the
|
||
public-house close by, I then heard.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After that Esther met me a few times, and her sister seemed much on her
|
||
mind; for she unvariably after she had felt my prick for a minute would
|
||
say, "And you mean to tell me it went right into Tilda?" "Yes right in."
|
||
"Oh! what a story,—it could not have been." I grew tired of her, and
|
||
she of me,—probably some other man had taken a fancy to her, so I gave
|
||
her ten pounds one night, told her I was going abroad, and would see
|
||
her on my return, but I never did. I saw her near my mother's house
|
||
two years afterwards with quite a genteel well-dressed young man, she
|
||
looking nice and fresh, but very vulgar. She saw me. Her eyes had a
|
||
painful expression in them, partly like fear, partly as if she were
|
||
going to cry; and then she dropped them. They passed me, I of course
|
||
not taking the slightest notice, but had a cock-stand, and felt jealous,
|
||
—such a funny thing is male nature. I never saw her afterwards, but saw
|
||
Sarah the washerwoman and ex-harlot, and gave her five shillings for a
|
||
chat about the two girls. Esther had gone off with a gent, Matilda had
|
||
married the potman, who had taken to drink, and used to "whop her." And
|
||
that is the end of my acquaintance with the two girls.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had great difficulty in keeping Esther from knowing too much about me,
|
||
and used a false name, had letters sent to a post-office, and had to do
|
||
much lying. The oddest thing was that though so near my mother's house,
|
||
and though I passed her one day when walking with one of my married
|
||
sisters, she did not know I was often living there, and close by her
|
||
home; but she found it out just before I parted with her. She knew quite
|
||
well that the conversation when sitting on the barrow could only have
|
||
been heard from one of the garden-walls close by the barrow; but I would
|
||
not at first tell her which. My real name I don't think she ever knew,
|
||
though I am not sure of that..
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Curiosity made me call on ex-harlot Sarah, who lived in one room, and
|
||
whilst talking I put my hand up her petticoats, on to her cunt. She
|
||
laughed, opened her thighs wide, and said, "I knowed yer would," and she
|
||
looked as if a fuck would have gratified her,—but I did not attempt it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0012"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Preliminary.—My taste for beauty of form.—Sarah Mavis.—
|
||
Midday in the Quadrant.—No. 13 J... s Street.—A bargain in
|
||
the hall.—A woman with a will.—Fears about my size.—
|
||
Muck.—Cold-blooded.—Tyranny.—My temper.—Submission.—A
|
||
revolt.—A half-gay lady.—Sarah watches me.—A quarrel.—
|
||
Reconciliation.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I must go back a year or more before the night when I last had
|
||
Kitty with the yellow hair and yellow motte, to tell the story of my
|
||
acquaintance with a woman of whom I have little to tell, considering
|
||
that she more or less is included in the history of my amours for nearly
|
||
four years, and who will appear more than once some years after that. A
|
||
word about my sensuous temperament first.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had early a taste for beauty of female form. Face had for me of course
|
||
the usual attraction, for beauty of expression always speaks to the soul
|
||
of a man first. A woman's eyes speak to him before she opens her mouth,
|
||
and instinctively (for actual knowledge only comes to him in his maturer
|
||
years) he reads in them liking, dislike, indifference, voluptuousness,
|
||
desire, sensuous abandonment, or fierce reckless lust.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
All these feelings can be seen in a woman's eyes alone, for they express
|
||
and move with every feeling, every passion, pure or sensual. They can
|
||
beget in the male pure love as it is called, which is believed to be
|
||
so till experience teaches that however pure it may be, it cannot exist
|
||
without the occasional help of a burning throbbing, stiff prick, up
|
||
a hot, wide-stretched cunt, and a simultaneous discharge of spermatic
|
||
juices from both organs. The rest of a woman's body, the breasts and
|
||
limbs, can move lust unaccompanied by love, and if once admiration of
|
||
them begins lust follows instantly. A small foot, a round, plump leg and
|
||
thigh, and a fat backside speak to the prick straight. Form is in fact
|
||
to most, more enticing, and creates a more enduring attachment in men of
|
||
mature years, than the sweetest face. A plain woman with fine limbs and
|
||
bum, and firm, full breasts will (unless her cunt be an ugly gash) draw
|
||
a man to her where the prettiest-faced Miss will fail. Few men, unless
|
||
their bellies be very big, or they be very old, will keep long to a bony
|
||
lady whose skinny buttocks can be held in one hand. I early had a
|
||
taste for female form, it was born with me. Even when a boy I selected
|
||
partners for dancing because they were what I called crummy, and admired
|
||
even at one time a fat-arsed middle-aged woman who sold us bull's eyes,
|
||
because I had caught her exhibiting large legs when squatting down to
|
||
piss. For years I had had at the period named, two friends, one of whom
|
||
was a sculptor, who alas! drank himself to death; and one a painter
|
||
still living as I write this. I had been in their studios, seen their
|
||
naked models, heard their opinions on both male and female beauty,
|
||
and had the various points of female perfection shown me on the
|
||
lady-sitters. I had them explained in two instances by the ladies
|
||
themselves, in private sittings, and with them I had sexual pleasures
|
||
which they said the artists had neither got out of them nor given them.
|
||
I had myself sketched from the nude, and was thought a not bad hand
|
||
at it, and had therefore by training, instinct, and a most voluptuous
|
||
temperament become a good judge of beauty of female form.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I did not write the above paragraphs, when I wrote what follows about
|
||
Sarah Mavis, they are added now many years afterwards, when I am
|
||
wondering at what I did in those early days, marvelling at my judgment
|
||
in selection, and seeking the reasons which guided me then in getting
|
||
for my sexual embraces, as many modes of female beauty of form, as
|
||
perhaps any one Englishman ever had,—short of a prince.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One Summer's morning about midday, I was in the Quadrant. It had been
|
||
raining, and the streets were dirty. In front of me I saw a well-grown
|
||
woman walking with that steady, solid, well-balanced step which I even
|
||
then knew indicated fleshy limbs, and a fat backside. She was holding
|
||
her petticoats well up out of the dirt, the common habit of even
|
||
respectable women then. With gay ladies the habit was to hold them up
|
||
just a little higher. I saw a pair of feet in lovely boots which seemed
|
||
perfection, and calves which were exquisite. I fired directly. Just
|
||
by Beak Street she stopped, and looked into a shop. "Is she gay?" I
|
||
thought. "No." I followed on, passed her, then turned round, and met her
|
||
eye. She looked at me, but the look was so steady, indifferent, and with
|
||
so little of the gay woman in her expression, that I could not make up
|
||
my mind as to whether she was accessible or not.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She turned back and went on without looking round. Crossing Tichborne
|
||
Street she raised her petticoats higher, it was very muddy there. I then
|
||
saw more of both legs, my prick stood at the sight of her limbs, and
|
||
settled me. I followed quickly, saying as I came close, "Will you come
|
||
with me?" She made no reply, and I fell behind. Soon she stopped
|
||
again at a shop, and looked in, and again I said, "May I go with
|
||
you?" "Yes,—where to?" "Where you like,—-I will follow you." Without
|
||
replying a word, and without looking at me, without hurrying, she walked
|
||
steadily on till she entered the house No. 13 J...s Street, which I
|
||
entered that day for the first time, but many hundreds of times since.
|
||
Her composure, and the way she stopped from time to time to look at
|
||
the shops as she went along astonished me: she seemed in no hurry, nor
|
||
indeed conscious that I was close at her heels, though she knew it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Inside the house she stopped at the foot of the staircase, and turning
|
||
round said in a low tone, "What are you going to give me?" "Ten
|
||
shillings." "I won't go upstairs then, so tell you at once." "What
|
||
do you want?" "I won't let any one come with me unless they give me a
|
||
sovereign at least." "I will give you that." Then she mounted, nothing
|
||
more being said. Asking me the question at the foot of the stairs
|
||
astonished me, I had been asked it in a room often before, and in the
|
||
street; but at the foot of a staircase,—never.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We entered a handsome bed-room. Turning round after paying for it, and
|
||
locking the door, I saw her standing with her back to the light (the
|
||
curtains were down, but the room was nevertheless light), one arm
|
||
resting on the mantle-piece. She looked at me fixedly, and I did at her.
|
||
Then I recollect noticing that her mouth was slightly open, and that she
|
||
looked seemingly vacantly at me (it always was so), that she had a black
|
||
silk dress on, and a dark-colored bonnet. Then desire impelled; I went
|
||
close to her, and began to lift her clothes. She pushed them down in a
|
||
commanding way saying, "Now none of that."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! here is your money," said I gutting down a sovereign on the
|
||
mantle-piece. She broke into a quiet laugh. "I did not mean that,"
|
||
she remarked. "Let me feel you." "Get away," said she impatiently, and
|
||
turning she took off her bonnet. I then saw she had thick and nearly if
|
||
not quite black hair, and recollect that I noticed these points just
|
||
in the order I have narrated them. Then she leaned her arm on the
|
||
mantle-piece again, and looked at me quietly, her mouth slightly open,
|
||
and I stood looking at her without speaking, my sperm fermenting in
|
||
my balls; but I was slightly bothered, almost intimidated by her cold
|
||
manner,—-a manner so unlike what I usually met with in strumpets.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You have beautiful legs." "So they say." "Let me see them." She laid
|
||
down on the sofa, her back to the light, without uttering a word. I
|
||
threw off coat and waistcoat, and sitting at the foot of the sofa threw
|
||
up her dress to her knees; higher I tried, but she resisted. Then
|
||
my fingers felt her cunt, and the delight of the feel and sight of her
|
||
beautiful limbs overwhelmed me. "Take off your things,—let me see you
|
||
undressed,—you must be exquisite." My hands roved all about her bum,
|
||
belly and thighs, and just seeing the flesh above her garters I fell
|
||
to kissing it, and kissed upwards till the aroma of her cunt met my
|
||
nostrils, and its thicket met my lips and mingled with my moustache,
|
||
which I then wore, though so few men then did. I fell on my knees by
|
||
the side of her, kissing, feeling, and smelling; but she kept her thighs
|
||
close together, and pushed her petticoats over my head whilst I kissed,
|
||
so that I saw but little of her beauties.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then excited almost to madness by my amusement I rose up. "Oh! come
|
||
to the bed,—come." She lay quite still. "No,—do it here,—leave me
|
||
alone,—I won't have my clothes pulled up,—I won't be pulled about,—if
|
||
you want it have me, and have done." "Well get on to the bed." "I
|
||
shan't." "I can't do it on the sofa." "Well I'm going then." "You shan't
|
||
till I have had you,—only let me see your thighs." "There then,"—and
|
||
up went her clothes half-way. "Higher," "I shan't." Now my prick was
|
||
out. "Get on the bed,—I won't do it here,—take your things off."
|
||
"I shan't." "You shall." All was said by her in a determined way, but
|
||
without signs of temper.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She rose without saying another word, I think I see now as I write, her
|
||
exquisite legs in beautiful silk stockings as they showed when getting
|
||
off the sofa, and getting on to the bed. "But I want your clothes off."
|
||
"I won't take them off, I'm in a hurry,—I never do." "Oh! you must."
|
||
"I won't,—now come and do what you want to do,—I'm in a hurry." She
|
||
lifted her clothes just high enough to show the fringe of her cunt, and
|
||
opened her thighs a little. I thrilled with lewd delight as I saw them,
|
||
and mounted her, laid between them, and inserted my prick. Ah! at my
|
||
first shove almost I was spending in her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! lay quiet dear, I've only been up you a second." "No,—get off,
|
||
and let me wash." I resisted, but she uncunted me, and got off the bed
|
||
quickly. "Now don't come near while I wash,—I can't bear a man looking
|
||
at me washing myself." I insisted, for I was longing to see the form I
|
||
had scarcely yet had a glimpse of. Putting down the basin she pulled the
|
||
bed-curtains round her to hide her whilst she slopped her quim. I would
|
||
not be rude, and saw nothing. Then on went her bonnet. "Are you going
|
||
first, or I?" said she. "I shall wait as long as you will." "Then I will
|
||
go first,"—and she was going away when I stopped her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"When will you again meet me?" "Oh! when out at all, I am up to one
|
||
o'clock in Regent Street." "Where do you live?" "I shan't say,—good
|
||
bye." "No,—wait,—come to me this afternoon." "I can't." "This
|
||
evening." She hesitated. "I can't stay long if I do." "Well an hour and
|
||
a half." "Perhaps." "Will you take off your clothes then?" "No,—good
|
||
bye, I am in a hurry." "Meet me at seven o'clock to-night.—do." "No."
|
||
"At eight then." "Well I will be here expecting you,—but I shan't stop
|
||
long." "Will you let me see your form up to your waist?" "Oh! I hate
|
||
being looked at,"—and off she went, leaving me in the room.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I dined at my Club, and was in a fever of lust all day. "Will she come?"
|
||
for she had only half promised. Half-an-hour before the time I was at
|
||
the house, and had the same room again. It was handsome throughout, had
|
||
a big four-post bed with handsome hangings (this was thirty years ago
|
||
mind) on one side of the room on another side by a partition was a
|
||
wash-hand stand of marble, against the wall on the opposite side a large
|
||
glass just at the level of the bed; at the foot of the bed a large
|
||
sofa opposite to the fire; over the chimney-piece a big glass sloping
|
||
forwards, so that those sitting or lying on the sofa could see
|
||
themselves reflected in it; in the angle of the room by the windows a
|
||
big cheval-glass which could be turned in any direction, two easy-chairs
|
||
and a bidet, the hangings were of red damask, two large gas-burners
|
||
were over the chimney-piece angles. It was the most compact, comfortable
|
||
baudy house bed-room I have perhaps ever been in, although by no means a
|
||
large room. They charged seven and six for its use, and twenty shillings
|
||
for the night. Scores of times I have paid both fees. I noticed all
|
||
this, and that a couple could see their amatory amusements on the bed,
|
||
on the sofa, or anyhow in fact, by aid of the cheval and other glasses.
|
||
I was delighted with the room, but in a fever of anxiety lest the lady
|
||
should not come. I walked about with my prick out, seeing how I looked
|
||
in the glasses, laid on the bed, and noticed how it looked in the
|
||
side-glass, squatted on the sofa, glorying in the sight of my balls and
|
||
stiff-stander. Then I had a sudden fear that she would think my prick
|
||
small; what put it into my head I never could exactly say, I used when
|
||
at school to fancy mine was smaller than that of other boys, and some
|
||
remark of a gay woman about its size made me most sensitive on the
|
||
topic. I was constantly asking the women if my prick was not smaller
|
||
than other men's. When they said it was a very good size,—as big as
|
||
most,—I did not believe them, and I used when I pulled it out, to say
|
||
in an apologetic tone, "Let's put it up, there's not much of it." "Oh!
|
||
it's quite big enough," one would say. "I've seen plenty smaller," would
|
||
say another. But still the idea clung to me, that it was not a prick
|
||
to be in any way proud of,—which was a great error. But I have told of
|
||
this weakness more than once before, I think.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I recollect well that night fearing she would think my prick
|
||
contemptible, and it pained me much, for I was hooked, although I did
|
||
not know it. I brushed my hair, and made myself inviting with a desire
|
||
to please her, without thinking that I was taking the trouble to do so
|
||
for a woman who was going to be fucked for twenty shillings, and whom I
|
||
now know did not then care how I looked, or who I was, long as she
|
||
got her money as soon as she could, and got rid of me to make way for
|
||
another man, or to go and spend what she had earned.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She did not keep her time. I kept listening, and peeping out as I heard
|
||
footsteps and saw couples bent on sexual pleasure going up the stairs,
|
||
and heard them overhead walking about. This and the excitement at the
|
||
recollection of my instantaneous spend between her magnificent thighs,
|
||
my pulling about my prick and contemplating it in the glass, the moving
|
||
about of the various couples made me in such a state of randiness that I
|
||
could scarcely keep from frigging. A servant who had noticed my peeping
|
||
came in, and begged I would not look out, for customers did not like it.
|
||
Did they know where my lady lived? and would they send for her? They did
|
||
not. Then the servant came to say I had been an hour in the room,—did I
|
||
mean to wait any longer? I knew what that meant, and was about to say I
|
||
would pay for the room twice, when I heard a heavy, slow tread, and the
|
||
lady's face appeared.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I grumbled at her delay, she took my complaints quietly, she could not
|
||
come earlier, was all she said. She pulled off her bonnet, put it on the
|
||
chair, turned round, leaned her arm on the mantle-piece, and stared at
|
||
me again in a half-vacant way with her mouth slightly open, just as in
|
||
the morning. I gave her very little time to stare, for I had my hand on
|
||
her cunt in no time, and nearly spent in my trowsers as I touched it.
|
||
She tried the same game,—she would not be pulled about,—she would not
|
||
let her cunt be looked at,—if I meant to do it, do it, and have
|
||
done with it. My blood rose. "I'd be damned if I would,—nor pay, nor
|
||
anything else unless she took her gown off. So she took it off laughing,
|
||
and laid down on the sofa. Not on the bed. No she would not. Then damned
|
||
if I would do it (though I was nearly bursting). Again she laughed, and
|
||
then got on to the bed. I saw breasts of spotless purity, and exquisite
|
||
shape, bursting out over the corset, threw up the petticoats, saw the
|
||
dark hair at the bottom of the belly, and the next instant a thrust,
|
||
a moment's heaving,—quietness,—another thrust,—a sigh,—a gush of
|
||
sperm,—and again I had finished with but a minute's complete sexual
|
||
enjoyment only.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Get up." "I won't" "Let me wash the muck out." "No."—and I pinned
|
||
her down, squeezed to her belly, grasped her haunches. "I've not done
|
||
spending." "Yes you have." A wriggle and a jerk, and I was uncunted
|
||
and swearing. She sat down on the basin, I stooped down, tore aside the
|
||
curtains, and put my hand on to her gaping cunt. She tried to rise, and
|
||
pushed me,—I pushed her. She tilted on one side, her bum caught the
|
||
edge of the basin, and upset the water.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Damn you," said she,—then she laughed and got up. I pushed her against
|
||
the side of the bed, and again got my fingers on the cunt,—slippery
|
||
enough it was. "You're one of those beasts, are you?" said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I've never felt your cunt properly, and I will." "Well let me wash it,
|
||
and you shall." She did so, I felt it, and then begged for another fuck.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You are not in a hurry." "Yes I am." "You said you would give me an
|
||
hour and a half." "Yes, but you have done me, and what is the good
|
||
of keeping me?" "I mean to do it again." "Double journey double pay."
|
||
"Nonsense,—you so excited me, that I've never had a proper poke yet."
|
||
"Well that is no fault of mine." She laughed, and turned questioner. "Do
|
||
you often have the women from Regent Street?" "Yes." "Do you know many?"
|
||
"Yes, I vary so." "Ah! you are fond of change,—I thought so,"—and she
|
||
got talkative after that. I had thought her almost a dummy.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Meanwhile I was gloating over her charms, her beautiful arms, the lovely
|
||
breasts I now played with, the lovely limbs I saw, for she had sat down
|
||
in the most enticing position with the ankle of one foot resting on
|
||
the knee of the other leg. I wanted to pull the clothes higher up the
|
||
thighs, she resisted, but I saw the beautiful ankles, the tiny boots
|
||
and feet, the creamy flesh of the thigh just above the garter, thighs
|
||
thickening, folding over, squeezing together, and hiding her cunt from
|
||
view when I tried to look up.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had hid my prick, the fear had come over me of her thinking it small,
|
||
and that prevented it standing again. An hour ran away. "I'm going,"
|
||
said she rising. My prick stood at the instant. "Let me." "Make haste
|
||
then." As she stood up I put my hand up her petticoats. She put her hand
|
||
down, and gave my prick a hard squeeze. I hollowed,—she laughed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I've a good mind not to let you,—you've been so long,—but you may do
|
||
it." She got on to the bedside. "Oh! for God's sake don't move,—that
|
||
attitude is exquisite." One leg was well on the bed, the petticoats were
|
||
squeezed up, and the leg on the ground from the boot-heel to about four
|
||
inches above her garter was visible. She was half turning round, her
|
||
lovely breasts, or rather one of them showed half-front, and with
|
||
her head looking round at me as she was moving, it altogether made a
|
||
ravishingly luscious picture. I put my hands up from behind between her
|
||
thighs. That broke the spell, she moved on to the bed directly,—I on to
|
||
her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! God you are heavenly, lovely,—oh! God my darling,—oh!" I was
|
||
spending and kissing her too quickly again; lust almost deprived me of
|
||
my pleasure. In a dozen shoves I was empty. It was all over.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"How quietly you stood in that attitude," said I. "I can stand in an
|
||
attitude nearly five minutes without moving, almost without showing that
|
||
I am breathing, without winking an eye." I thought nothing of this at
|
||
the time, excepting that it was brag.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Give me five shillings, for I have been a long time with you,—I've a
|
||
reason,—I won't ask you again." I gave it her. "Shall you be in Regent
|
||
Street to-morrow morning?" "Yes."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was in Regent Street, met her, and had her you may be sure, and
|
||
repeated these meetings for a week daily, and sometimes twice a day; but
|
||
got no more than the shortest time with her, the quickest fuck, a rapid
|
||
uncunting. She did not spend with me, and showed no signs of pleasure,
|
||
scarcely took the trouble to move her bum, would not undress, would not
|
||
let me look at her cunt. I submitted to it, for I was caught, but did
|
||
not know that then,—she did. That is she knew that I was damnably lewd
|
||
upon her, and used that knowledge to suit her convenience. I had no
|
||
right to grumble at it. I need not have had her, had I not liked upon
|
||
those terms. But I did. At length I grumbled, and at last almost had a
|
||
quarrel. "I won't see you again," said I. "No one asks you," said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
As my means were not large, and my purse grew rather empty, I was glad
|
||
to keep away a few days. Then again I saw her in Regent Street; and
|
||
after giving her the wink followed her. She walked on, but instead of
|
||
going to the house, passed the end of the street. On she went, I went
|
||
close to her, it was the second time I had spoken to her in the street.
|
||
"Oh! I did not understand you," she said, "besides I'm in a hurry." "Oh!
|
||
do come." "Well I can't stop five minutes." "Nonsense." "Well then I
|
||
can't,"—and she went on walking. My prick got the better of my temper.
|
||
"Well come back." She turned round, and bent her way to J...s Street,
|
||
saying, "Don't let us go in together."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When in the house she got on to the bed without a moment's delay. I
|
||
had her, and she was out of the house again in less than ten minutes,
|
||
leaving me in a very angry state of mind; but she promised to meet me
|
||
the following night if she could, and to stay longer with me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She came an hour late, and found me fretting and fuming in the bed-room.
|
||
They did not hurry me now at that house, I being already known there,
|
||
and gave me whenever they could the same chamber. "I'm in a great
|
||
hurry," were the first words Sarah said. "Why you told me you would stay
|
||
longer." "Yes,—I am sorry, but I can't." "You never can,—but take
|
||
off your gown." "I really can't,—have me at the side of the bed,—you
|
||
wanted it so the other day." "No I won't." "Then I'll get on the
|
||
bed,"—and on she got.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I tried to open her legs, to turn her round to see her bum (I had
|
||
never seen it yet properly). No she would not undress, she would do
|
||
nothing,—I might have it her way, or leave it alone and go. How green
|
||
it was to submit to all this.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I lost my temper, for my delight I saw was in her lovely form, in her
|
||
physical beauty; whilst she seemed to think that the only joy I could
|
||
have was to spend in her cunt as fast as I could. "I won't have you at
|
||
all," said I getting resolute at last. "All right," said she getting off
|
||
the bed, "I'm really in a hurry,—another night I will." "Another night
|
||
be damned—you are nearly a bilk,—there,"—and I threw the sovereign on
|
||
a table, and put on my hat. "Are you going?" "Yes, I'm going to get some
|
||
woman who is not ashamed of her cunt." "Go along then." Off I went.
|
||
When halfway down the stairs I heard her calling to me to come back, but
|
||
savage I went off.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I walked up Regent Street savage with her, and with myself too, for not
|
||
having had my fuck, even if she had gone away a minute afterwards. Randy
|
||
as the devil I saw a woman at the corner of the Circus, and accosted
|
||
her, she turned away, I accosted her again. "Will you come with
|
||
me?" "Yes if you like." "Do you know a house about here?" "No I'm a
|
||
stranger." Then I took her to J... s Street, had her two or three times
|
||
and toyed with her a long time, stopping till she would stop no longer,
|
||
saying she should be locked out if she was not off. She was only
|
||
half-gay I think, and wanted a fuck. I had just offered myself in time.
|
||
She was a biggish woman of about thirty years of age. After I had fucked
|
||
her the first time, we laid on the bed together; she played with my
|
||
prick till it was stiff again, and then turning on to her back said,
|
||
"Come on,—let's have it again."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I thought much of my fine-limbed Sarah Mavis, but it was with anger. A
|
||
fuck for ten shillings was all very well when randy, but even when in a
|
||
hurry I never was satisfied till I had pulled the cunt open, and given
|
||
it a general inspection, although it was generally but a rapid one in
|
||
those days. If I had the same woman again another day, it was because
|
||
I liked her and liked to talk to her, for I always found them more
|
||
complaisant the longer I knew them. But here had I been having a woman
|
||
daily, and sometimes twice a day, mainly because she was so exquisite in
|
||
form (for I had some idea even then that her cunt was not a good fit
|
||
to my prick;) yet I had never seen her cunt; nor her backside, nor her
|
||
bubbies, nor her arm-pits,' nor her navel, nor anything properly, and so
|
||
I determined not to have her again, and to dismiss her from my mind. But
|
||
I was hooked.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To economize I again went with cheap women, and seemed to get just as
|
||
nice women for ten shillings as I did for twenty; but I had taken a
|
||
liking for the house in J...s Street, which was an expensive one, and
|
||
liked the best room, and took my cheap women to my dear room. One
|
||
woman said, "Well you might give me a little more, and have a cheaper
|
||
room,—the room gets nearly as much as you give me." And I saw a woman
|
||
there one night pocket the comb, and a piece of soap,—she stole them.
|
||
I heard in pleasant conversation afterwards, that soap and combs were
|
||
often stolen by women,—especially soap.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
About a fortnight afterwards I saw my Venus again, and again was
|
||
closetted with her. I could resist my desire for her no longer, for
|
||
having never ceased thinking of her even when fucking other women. She
|
||
was just as calm, but there was a little, quiet spite about her. When
|
||
she had taken off her bonnet, and looked at me for a minute with her
|
||
mouth open as usual, she said, "I suppose you have been having other
|
||
women." I can't tell why it was, but I lied, and said "no." "What did
|
||
you go upstairs with one for?" said she, "the night after you left
|
||
me,—I was in the parlour, and peeping through the door saw you and
|
||
the woman who stumbled at the foot of the stairs" (which was the fact).
|
||
"Well I did," I replied, "and saw her cunt,—and that's more than I ever
|
||
saw of yours." "You've seen as much as you will." Putting on my hat
|
||
in rage, "Then I may as well go,—here is your money,"—and I
|
||
turned towards the door. "Don't be a fool," said she, "what <i>do</i> you
|
||
want?—what <i>do</i> all you men want?—you are all beasts alike,—you're
|
||
never satisfied." She was angry. "Don't be in a hurry, and let's see
|
||
your precious cunt." I recollect saying that very distinctly, being
|
||
angry,—and that up to that time I had been chaste in my remarks. I was
|
||
at that time of my life not at all lewd or strong in word with women
|
||
when we first met, but was somewhat less so so soon as I warmed, and
|
||
only when randy to the highest degree or by fits and starts, spiced my
|
||
conversation highly with lewd expressions.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0013"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XIII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Sarah's complaisance.—Mistress Hannah.—About Sarah.—
|
||
Sexual indifference.—After dinner.—Stark naked at last.—
|
||
Her form.—The scar.—Hannah's friendship.—The baudy house
|
||
parlour.—The Guardsman.—Sarah's greed.—A change in her
|
||
manner.—A miscarriage.—Going abroad.—I am madly in
|
||
love.—Sarah's history.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She laughed. "Well I will,—but don't make me undress,—I'm in a hurry."
|
||
"Of course,—you always are." She laid on the sofa, and pulled up her
|
||
clothes,—she was yielding. "No,—come here." She came, and laid on the
|
||
side of the bed. At length I saw those glorious thighs open wider, the
|
||
dark-shaded crack with the swelling lips showed itself more freely than
|
||
I had ever seen it before. I dropped on my knees, and propping up one of
|
||
her feet with my hand, lifted the leg so that the thighs distended, and
|
||
a large bit of crimson nymphae began to show, the faint but delicious
|
||
odour of her cunt stole up my nostrils, my lips closed on her gap, and
|
||
kissed it lecherously, my brain whirled as my nose rubbed in the thicket
|
||
of dark hair, and my lip touched her clitoris. I know nothing more
|
||
excepting that I was up her as she laid there, and spending as quickly
|
||
as ever, before I had in fact well plugged her. "Are you satisfied?"
|
||
said she as she looked up from washing her cunt by the side of me. "No,
|
||
it's so quick,—you fetch me so quickly." "That is no fault of mine."
|
||
She had said so often before. I recollect all these apparently trivial,
|
||
these various feelings and circumstances, as well as if it were
|
||
yesterday, for she had made her mark on me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had partly conquered, and saw my victory. "I like seeing you so,"
|
||
said I, "but won't see you, or any other woman who won't let me see her
|
||
charms, and who is always in such a hurry,—it would be all very well if
|
||
I saw you for the first time—(why you have a new black silk dress on."
|
||
"Yes, I bought it with your money," said she),—"but for a regular friend
|
||
as I am, it is unsupportable." I conquered more, and subsequently, told
|
||
her that I might be in Regent Street one day, but I did not go there
|
||
(I had made no promise). She said she went out against her will to see
|
||
me,—could I write to say when she was to meet me? No,—but I could
|
||
write to the baudy house, and they would send on the letter. I called
|
||
there one morning, and left a letter. The Mistress was a shortish
|
||
sandy-haired woman about thirty years old, with a white face; she looked
|
||
very fixedly at me, and smiled. She would send on the letter to Miss
|
||
Sarah Mavis which I found was the name she went by; but Sarah never came
|
||
to my letter, and I paid for the room for nothing. Then I sent for the
|
||
Mistress; had a bottle of champagne with her, and she opened her heart
|
||
a little, she was soon a little screwed, and this was what she told me.
|
||
Her name was Hannah.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She had not known Miss Mavis long,—only a month or so before she had
|
||
come in with me,—did not often see her now excepting with me. Mavis had
|
||
been asking if I had been seen in the house with any other woman, "and
|
||
of course I did not tell her," said Sandyhead. She thought her a nice
|
||
woman, and had struck up acquaintance with her. Now she often came
|
||
into the parlour to chat with her when I had left, or before she came
|
||
upstairs to me, when I was at the house before my appointed time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Things went on thus for a little time longer, Sarah doing much as she
|
||
liked, but certainly becoming more complaisant. She stopped longer, we
|
||
began to talk; I was of course curious about her, she about me, I dare
|
||
say she got much out of me, I but little out of her. What I mainly
|
||
learned was that she only came on the streets occasionally, and from
|
||
about eleven to one o'clock in the day,—never afterwards; and when she
|
||
had sufficient money to "go on with," as she said, she came not out at
|
||
all. "I hate it," said she, "hate you men,—you are all beasts,—you're
|
||
never satisfied unless you are pulling a woman about in all manner of
|
||
ways." "It pleases us," said I, "we admire you so." "Well it does not
|
||
please me,—I want them to do what they have to do, and let me go." "Why
|
||
don't you go out in the afternoon or evening?" "No, I get my money in
|
||
the morning, and have other things to do the rest of the day."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She had not been gay long,—not more than a month before I had met
|
||
her,—was taken to the house in J... s Street by the first man who met
|
||
her in the streets, and had been there often since. No she never had
|
||
been gay before, she would swear, and often wished she were dead rather
|
||
than have to come out, and let men pull her about, and put their nasty
|
||
muck into her,—"nasty muck" was always the pleasant way in which she
|
||
spoke of a man's sperm.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"One would think you never cared about a poke,—I wonder how often you
|
||
spend." "Oh! it's all the same to me whether I have it, or whether I
|
||
don't,—if I do it once a fortnight it's as much as I care about,—you
|
||
beasts of men seem to think of nothing else, and you leave us poor women
|
||
all the trouble that comes from putting your muck into us." "What the
|
||
devil do you care about?" said I after a chat with her one day, in which
|
||
she had just said what I have narrated. "Oh! I don't care about anything
|
||
much."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Another day she said, "I like a nice dinner, and then a read in an
|
||
arm-chair, till I go to sleep, or a nice bit of supper, and to get into
|
||
bed,—I'm so tired of a night, I like to get to bed early if I can." We
|
||
went on talking about eating and drinking; she told me what she liked,
|
||
and what she disliked with much gusto and earnestness. "I'll give you
|
||
a good dinner", said I, "and we will come here afterwards." "Will you?"
|
||
"Yes,—but I won't unless I have you three hours here." "Impossible,—I
|
||
dare not be out after half-past ten." "Come early." "I can't come very
|
||
early, for I must be home in the afternoon." There were all sorts of
|
||
obstacles,—so many that I gave it up, not going to be humbugged. But
|
||
<i>she</i> would not give it up, and it was arranged that if she might name
|
||
the evening, she would be with me at six o'clock, and stay with me till
|
||
ten,—an immense concession,—it was the dinner that did it. I saw she
|
||
was fond of her stomach, and that made me offer the dinner as a bait.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She would not come in after me to the restaurant, I was to meet her at
|
||
the corner of St. Martin's lane in a cab, and go with her,—and so it
|
||
came off. We went to the Cafe de P..v...e in Leicester square, I had
|
||
already ordered a private room, and a nice dinner. My God how she
|
||
enjoyed it! "It's a long time since I've had such a good dinner", said
|
||
she, "but never mind, better times are coming again for me, I feel
|
||
sure." She ate largely, she drank well, and to my astonishment when I
|
||
got up to kiss her, she kissed me in return, and gave my piercer the
|
||
slightest possible pinch outside my trowsers. "Let's feel you," said I.
|
||
Equally astonished was I when she said, "Bolt the door, the waiter may
|
||
be in,"—and then I had a grope, and she felt my prick. "Let's go—let's
|
||
go,—I am dying for you." Off we went arm in arm. Directly we were well
|
||
away from the Cafe she let go my arm. "You go first, and I will follow."
|
||
I thought she was going to cheat me. "I dare not be seen walking arm in
|
||
arm with a man,—but I will follow." In five minutes we were in the room
|
||
together. Sarah Mavis was just in the slightest degree elevated, and
|
||
perhaps more than slightly lewd.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To pull off my things, to help her off with hers partially was the work
|
||
of a minute. "I must piddle first,—champagne always makes me want to
|
||
piddle so." "Does it make you randy?" "Oh! Lord it does sometimes; but
|
||
it's such a time since I tasted it before tonight, I almost forget."
|
||
"Are you so now?" "Oh! I don't know,—come on the bed," said she. She
|
||
opened her thighs wide, she let me grope and smell, and kiss, and see.
|
||
"Come on,—do." Instinct told me she wanted it, I embraced her, and
|
||
was enjoying her, when she clasped me firmly, sought my mouth. "Oh! my
|
||
darling, I'm co—-com—h—hing," said she spending as she cried out, and
|
||
fetched me at the same instant. It was the first time she had ever spent
|
||
with me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We laid in heavenly quietness, prick and cunt in holy junction,
|
||
distilling, slobbering, and bedewing each other's mouths and privates,
|
||
whilst the soft voluptuous pleasure was creeping through our limbs,
|
||
bodies, and senses. She was in no hurry to wash out the muck. "Oh! I'm
|
||
chocking," said she after a time, "get off." "I won't." "Oh! do,—my
|
||
stays choke me when I lie down after food,—I'm almost suffocated." I
|
||
held fast. "If I get off, you won't let me do it again." "Yes,—yes I
|
||
will." She jerked my prick out of her cunt, I got to the side of the
|
||
bed, she sat up, and was about to get off, when I stopped her, and
|
||
together we undid her stays, and took them off. "Let me wash now." "No
|
||
you shan't,—I've never yet fucked with my first sperm in you,—let me
|
||
now, there is a darling." She laughed, and fell back; then for a few
|
||
minutes we kissed and toyed. Her magnificent breasts were now free, I
|
||
buried my face between them, and kissed them rapturously; her moistened
|
||
quim I felt, and it drove me wild with desire; so gluing my mouth to
|
||
hers I mounted her, and we were soon in Elysium again, Sarah enjoying
|
||
her fuck in a way I thought from her cold-blooded manner previously
|
||
she was quite incapable of,—and there we laid, nestling cock and cunt
|
||
together, till a slight sleep or doze overtook both of us.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
In a minute or two Sarah sprang up, and rushed to the basin. I lay
|
||
still, contemplating her, and saying I would not wash my prick for a
|
||
week, so that I might retain in the roots and its moistened fringe our
|
||
mixed juices, the remnants of our first spend together. When she had
|
||
washed she laid down by the side of me. "Let's have a nap," said she.
|
||
The wine seemed to be getting into her head more and more, though she
|
||
was but in the slightest degree fuddled.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I could not sleep. The sight of her breasts relieved from her stays, the
|
||
free manner in which she let her petticoats lay half up her thighs, the
|
||
delight at finding her take pleasure in my embraces, exulted me beyond
|
||
measure. I joked and tickled her. "Let's see you naked." "You shan't."
|
||
"Well stand up, and let me see your limbs naked,—take off your
|
||
petticoats, even if you keep your chemise on." She was yielding, took
|
||
petticoats off, but would do no more. I had seen more than any other
|
||
man, and she would do no more, she said. The wine had evaporated, and
|
||
she was herself again, quiet, composed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Maddened with desire. "I'll give you a sovereign," I said, "to take
|
||
the chemise off." "Will you!" "Yes." "No I won't." "I'll give you two."
|
||
"What can you want to see more for?" "Hang it, take the money, and
|
||
let me, or I'll rip it off without paying." I closed with her, and
|
||
struggled, pulled the chemise up above her haunches, pulled it down
|
||
below her breasts, tore it. "Now don't,—I won't have it," said she
|
||
getting angry, "it won't please you if I do,—you will not like to see
|
||
me half as well afterwards, I tell you." "Yes I shall,—here is the
|
||
money,—now let me see you naked, I'll give you three sovereigns."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She pushed me away, and sat down. "Where is the money?" said she. I
|
||
gave it her. "I've got an ugly scar,—I don't like it seen." "Never
|
||
mind,—show it." Slowly she dropped the chemise, and stood in all her
|
||
naked beauty, and pointing to a scar just below her breasts, and about
|
||
four inches above her navel, "There," said she, "is it not ugly?—does
|
||
it not spoil me!—how I hate it!"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I told her no,—that she was so beautiful, that it mattered not. Yet
|
||
ugly it was. A seam looking like a piece of parchment which had been
|
||
held close to a fire and crinkled, and then glazed, star-shaped, white,
|
||
and as big as a large egg lay between her breasts and her navel. It was
|
||
the only defect on one of the most perfect and beautiful forms that God
|
||
ever had created.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"There," said she covering it up, "you won't want me naked again,—now
|
||
I dare say you don't like me as much." Yes I did. "Do you?" "Yes." She
|
||
came and kissed me. I often had her as naked as she was born afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What is the time?" "Ten o'clock." "I must go." "Another poke." "Make
|
||
haste then." We had it. "Oh! now don't keep me,—if I'm not home by
|
||
half-past ten I shall be half murdered." She had let expressions like
|
||
that drop more than once; but I got no explanation excepting that she
|
||
lived with her father and mother,—and at that time I believed it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At the next meeting she had her old quiet manner, her old "keep your
|
||
distance" was attempted; but it was impossible. A woman must always
|
||
give again what she has once given, she cannot help it. Then came more
|
||
dinners, but she was more cautious now in what she ate and drank, less
|
||
reckless in her embraces of me; but we were closer acquaintances than
|
||
we had been; she let me pull her about more freely and as a matter of
|
||
course, washed her quim without hiding herself for that operation, and
|
||
so on,—yet still she held me at a great distance, and was reserved. She
|
||
conquered me, in a degree.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
In fact she did pretty well what she liked with me; saw me when she
|
||
liked, stopped with me as long as she thought proper, let me fuck her
|
||
just as often as she liked, and no more (and it was rarely she let me
|
||
do that more than once a day), see to her knees, or to her cunt, or pull
|
||
her about just in the degree she for the time thought fit to permit. I
|
||
grumbled, said I would see more complaisant women. "Well I might if I
|
||
liked,"—but I did not. Her indifference to sexual pleasure chilled and
|
||
annoyed me and for a reason I never could understand, her cunt never
|
||
seemed quite to fit me, nor fetch me with the voluptuousness that scores
|
||
of other women have done. Yet I saw her almost exclusively for three
|
||
years, and when she gave herself up to pleasure with me, my delight was
|
||
unbounded; when she let me have her with her cunt unwashed after our
|
||
first copulation, I thought of it for days afterwards. Altogether
|
||
she had her way with me in a manner I did not see, and have only
|
||
comprehended since.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This went on for some months. Whether she had other male friends or not
|
||
I don't know, but I never found her in Regent Street or other places
|
||
where I had once been able to find her, after I began to see her
|
||
regularly, and have reason to think that she ceased casuals after she
|
||
had me, and perchance another, that is all. Hannah said often at a
|
||
future day that I was her only friend.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I have not yet described her. She was of perfect height for a woman, say
|
||
five feet seven, her form from her chin to her toe-nails was faultless,
|
||
if anything inclining to too much flesh, and to too great a backside;
|
||
but then I liked flesh, and a woman's bum could not be too big for me. I
|
||
used to rub my lips and cheeks over her bum for a quarter of an hour at
|
||
a time, when she condescended to turn it upwards for so long a time for
|
||
that worship. Handsome her face certainly was, but it was of a somewhat
|
||
heavy character: her eyes were dark, soft, and vague in expression which
|
||
together with the habit of leaving her lips slightly open, gave her a
|
||
thoughtful, and at times half-vacant look. Her nose was charming and
|
||
<i>retrouss<EFBFBD></i>, her mouth small, with full lips, and a delicious set of
|
||
very small white teeth, her hair was nearly black, long, thick, and
|
||
coarsish dark hair in large quantity was in her armpits, and showed
|
||
slightly when her arms were down, her arms and breasts were superb. Her
|
||
cunt was thick-lipped, and with largish inner lips which showed well
|
||
in nearly the whole length of the split; her mons was very plump,
|
||
and covered well, but not widely with crisp black hair. She looked
|
||
twenty-six, yet was not more than twenty-two, and she looked most
|
||
handsome when lying asleep.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
If I were asked the most perfect thing about her, I should say her feet
|
||
and legs up to her notch—they were simply perfect; I have seen them as
|
||
handsome in smaller women, never in one of her height. I must add that
|
||
her cunt was large both outside and inside, and that she was not a
|
||
voluptuous poke to me, but why I can only guess at now; I did not know
|
||
it whilst I was acquainted with her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"A little of that satisfies me," she would say of poking, "once a
|
||
week,—once a fortnight, excepting at times,—you men are beasts, all of
|
||
you." She at first refused my mouth, never moved her bum, and laid like
|
||
a log. "Here I am,—do what you like,—do it, and get it over,—or
|
||
leave it," was her common mode of meeting my grumbling. Her first sexual
|
||
pleasure with me was I believe the night she dined with me; afterwards
|
||
she took pleasure with me more frequently, but un-cunting me, and
|
||
rushing out of bed to wash the instant I had spent, before I had indeed
|
||
done spending; until a sudden change in her took place which I shall
|
||
tell of, and then she was kinder, more lustful, or perhaps I might
|
||
say more loving, and more reckless; letting me enjoy her after my own
|
||
fashion, and abandoning herself to enjoyment as much as it was perhaps
|
||
in her nature to do so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I found that she often now was with the keeper of the house, or rather
|
||
she who represented her,—Hannah. So I got acquainted more closely with
|
||
Hannah, would go into her parlour, and talk with her before Sarah came.
|
||
This began one day when I was awaiting Sarah by her asking me if I
|
||
would cast up a column of figures, nearly the whole of which was in five
|
||
shillings and seven and sixes. I did it once, then I did it a second
|
||
time. Going in one day just afterwards she stepped out from her parlour,
|
||
and thanked me. I stepped into the parlour, and got into the custom
|
||
of doing so,—if ladies were not in there,—but there was a good
|
||
introduction business done, as will be seen, and oftentimes ladies were
|
||
waiting there till their swains arrived.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One day she cooked a luncheon for me, once a breakfast, the latter was
|
||
during the time I had quarrelled with Sarah, and took another woman to
|
||
sleep with me there. I complimented her on her cooking, she was half
|
||
groggy (as she often was), and was very talkative. "Lord," said she,
|
||
"you have tasted my dinners many a times." "Nonsense." "Yes you have."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Where?" "Do you recollect a ball at———, where all the servants were
|
||
allowed to look at the table before supper, and your coming down with
|
||
Mr.———, and we all scuffling back?" "Perfectly." "Well I cooked that
|
||
supper." Then it turned out that she had been cook at a house where
|
||
I was a constant visitor, she had recognized me at once, but did not
|
||
recollect my name, or so she said,—indeed it was not probable that she
|
||
knew it. She had been caught with a soldier in the house, and had been
|
||
kicked out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Now by chance of fortune she was keeper of a baudy house, and her
|
||
soldier visited her there when in London,—he was a Guardsman,—and she
|
||
supplied him with money, and lots he had, for she robbed her Mistress
|
||
wholesale of the baudy house profits.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Hannah had two sisters; one a married woman with a bad husband, and
|
||
several children. She often came and assisted at J.... s Street,
|
||
sometimes acting as chambermaid,—and about two years after this period
|
||
of my history, a second one appeared who had been a housemaid, and who
|
||
had I suppose also lost her character. A pretty blue-eyed girl about
|
||
twenty years old with a cast in her eye, and a lovely leg up to within
|
||
a few inches of her cunt. I never saw higher, and shall have more to
|
||
say about her hereafter. Her name was, Susan—a sailor was said to be in
|
||
love with her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Sarah at the end of some months asked me to give her five pounds, and
|
||
soon afterwards ten pounds. She was going to make up a sum of money to
|
||
buy a business for her father. She had been dressing very shabbily I
|
||
noticed, and said she knew I did not mind that, and it was all because
|
||
she was trying to save money,—to quit that life she hoped,—and I
|
||
believed it. I could not get her for several days, yet could have sworn
|
||
I had heard her voice one day in loud altercation with a man in the
|
||
parlour when I was waiting for her upstairs. I rang and asked for her;
|
||
the servant came, and asserted that Miss Mavis was not there, and
|
||
I never saw her that night. Next day I made an appointment (through
|
||
Hannah) for eleven a.m., and waited a long time before she came up. She
|
||
looked ill. "You've been crying." "I have not." "Yes you have,—your
|
||
eyes are red,—aye, and wet now." She asserted she had not, and then
|
||
burst out sobbing saying she was unwell. I was distressed, and sent for
|
||
wine, Hannah came up and comforted her (I saw Hannah knew all about it).
|
||
Then we were left to ourselves. "I've never been abed all night," said
|
||
Sarah. "Come to bed now." To my extreme astonishment <i>into</i> bed she
|
||
came, after looking at me in a very earnest manner.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had often asked her before, and she never would; saying she never
|
||
had been in bed but with one man, and never meant. I was enraptured,
|
||
stripped to my skin, and was soon pressing every part of her body to
|
||
mine. She gave herself up to me entirely, her tongue met mine as we
|
||
spent. "Don't throw me out now dear." "Very well." Oh! miracle, I
|
||
thought, and there we lay, prick and cunt soaking together, till we had
|
||
another fuck, then she dozed off in my arms, and I soon afterwards. We
|
||
slept more than two hours, then my fingers sought her cunt directly;
|
||
and awakened her. I told her the time, she sighed saying, "It's no
|
||
matter,—it serves them right." It was a day of miracles, Hannah sent up
|
||
food, we ate it in bed, we fucked again and again. I was delighted with
|
||
the spunk we left on the sheets; then we dined at the Caf<61>, and went
|
||
back to the baudy house,—more fucking, no cunt-washing, all was free
|
||
baudy, abandonment.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Hannah came up to us about the time Sarah usually left me, and told her
|
||
it was time to go. Sarah said she did not care a damn, Hannah begged
|
||
her to go,—she would go home with her. She agreed to go, kissed me, and
|
||
said I was a kind fellow. I waited outside, and tried to dodge her home;
|
||
but was unsuccessful; the two discovered me, stopped, and upbraided me,
|
||
and came back to the baudy house. Then she made me promise not to follow
|
||
her, and went out to piddle as she said. Hannah followed, I waited five
|
||
minutes for them, and then called to the servant. She came in with a
|
||
demure face, and said "Lor sir they have both gone out five minutes
|
||
ago."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
For weeks after that Sarah was changed, and with the exception of not
|
||
stripping entirely did as freely as I wished, she did everything I
|
||
wanted, but sleep with me all night; she kept out later, but away
|
||
at night she went; she embraced me, enjoyed her fucking, and in fact
|
||
treated me like a husband. Then she said one day, "I'm some months gone
|
||
in the family way." "Who's the dad?" "You perhaps." "No I'm not,—it's
|
||
some man you are fond of, not me." "I am fond of no man," said she. Then
|
||
she was ill, and away for three weeks, she had had a miscarriage. I was
|
||
in despair, and sent her money all the time of her illness, but could
|
||
learn nothing from Hannah, excepting that Sarah was a dear good woman,
|
||
and too good for him. That was said before the sister, who cried out,
|
||
"You shut up Hannah." So I came to the conclusion there was some other
|
||
man in the way.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Another day I pumped Hannah, but she was an old bird, and not easily
|
||
caught. "She is fond of a man," I said. "She is not a fond sort,—if she
|
||
is fond of any man at all it's you,—but she has got her duty to do."
|
||
"What's that?" "Ask her,—I don't know her business. Now you get out,
|
||
there are some ladies coming here directly, and Miss Mavis won't like
|
||
your being here with them." "I'm not her property." "Pretty nearly you
|
||
are,—at all events go, there is a good gentleman. Whilst Sarah was away
|
||
I did get acquainted with three or four ladies, and two of them I had.
|
||
Sarah had then either gone abroad or I had had a desperate quarrel with
|
||
her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When Sarah met me again she was still miserably ill, and thanked me for
|
||
my kindness warmly. We resumed our meetings, and again she was cautious,
|
||
but no longer bounced me. She spent with me, enjoyed me, but entreated
|
||
me. "Oh! let me wash out the muck,—now do pull it out,—I am so
|
||
frightened of being ill again." So I let her have her way. She refused
|
||
to say anything about her illness, excepting that it was I who had
|
||
caused it; but I did not believe her. She usually now gave way to
|
||
pleasure with me; at the end of the month I gave her twenty pounds to
|
||
make up a sum, then she got still more exacting about money. "Oh! I do
|
||
stop a long time with you,—give me more money,—do,—I want to make
|
||
up a sum," etc., etc.,—and then of course came a lie. At length she said
|
||
one bright sunny morning it was, I had poked her, and was laying on the
|
||
sofa afterwards, she sitting on the easy-chair, her lovely breasts
|
||
out, one beautiful leg over the other showing slightly the flesh of her
|
||
thighs, "You won't see much more of me,—we are going abroad."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I started as if I had been shot at. "You?—nonsense,—never." "I am
|
||
indeed,—I'm sick of this life, and will go anywhere, do anything to get
|
||
out of it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I sank back on the sofa sobbing, it came home to me all at once that
|
||
I was madly in love with her. I was dazed with my own discovery,—I in
|
||
love with a gay woman! one whose cunt might have had a thousand pricks
|
||
up it! who might have sprung from any dung-hill!—impossible! I felt mad
|
||
with myself,—degraded!—impossible,—it could not be,—and for a time
|
||
I conquered myself. I tried then to draw her out about herself. It
|
||
was useless. Her quiet way of asserting that she <i>was</i> going at length
|
||
brought home the conviction that she spoke the truth. Then I laid and
|
||
sobbed on the sofa for half-an-hour. "Oh! you will soon get another
|
||
friend," said she. "No, no,—I can get a woman, but not one I shall
|
||
like,—Sarah my darling, Sarah I love you,—I dote on you,—oh! for
|
||
God's sake don't leave,—come with me,—you shan't lead this life,—we
|
||
will go abroad together."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"That is impossible,—if I did you would leave me, and then what should
|
||
I do?—come back to this life,—no." "You are going with somebody
|
||
else,—who?" "I can't say,—I'll tell you when I am gone." "When are you
|
||
going?" "Perhaps in a fortnight, perhaps a little later on."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I calmed for a time, a fortnight might give me a chance of persuading
|
||
her, and I began it at once; but it was all, "No,—no,—no,—it's all
|
||
for the best for both of us,"—and again I fell into deep despair, my
|
||
heart felt breaking, I had been so happy with this woman for months, she
|
||
had so filled my thoughts, so occupied my spare time, that I had half
|
||
forgotten my home life. Now I felt alone again, I had told her some
|
||
of my troubles,—not all,—now I poured them all out, and offered
|
||
everything,—all I had,—to go that next day abroad, and never return;
|
||
that I would make her love me though she did not now, I promised all men
|
||
could promise,—and meant it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"No,—no,—impossible,"—and again I fell back on the sofa sobbing like
|
||
an infant, I have almost the deadly heart-ache now as I write this. She
|
||
sat looking at me for some time, then she arose, stooped over me, and
|
||
kissed me. I turned round, and—how strange that in my despair I noticed
|
||
it, and now recollect noticing it!—as she stooped her chemise opened,
|
||
and as I put my arm round her, her breasts touched my face, and as I
|
||
moved to kiss them I saw her whole lovely form down to her feet, the
|
||
dark hair of her motte, the bright white scar; and all in the soft
|
||
subdued light which is on a woman's body when enveloped in a thin
|
||
chemise,—and my prick stood whilst kissing her and sobbing, and she
|
||
was soothing me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"It's of no use your loving me," she said, "and it's of no use my loving
|
||
you,—don't take on so,—perhaps when I am gone you will be happier at
|
||
home,—I can't love you, although I like you very much, for you have
|
||
been a good, kind man to me,—I nearly do love you I think,—if I were
|
||
with you I'm sure I should,—but it's of no use, for I am a married
|
||
woman, and have two children, and am going with them and my husband."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was amazed, and doubted it. "I'll bring you my children to see," said
|
||
she, "it was to get them their dinners and tea that I always left you
|
||
at times as I have." "And at night?" "I always go home before he comes
|
||
home." "You always go home to your husband?" "Yes."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
How I loathed that man!—my loathing rose to my lips. "That miserable
|
||
contemptible cur lives by your body,—a dirty vagabond." "No he's
|
||
not,—poor fellow, he would earn our living if he could, but he can't."
|
||
"I don't believe it,—a man who lives by a woman is barely a man,—I
|
||
would empty cesspools to keep a woman I loved, rather than another man
|
||
should stroke her,—no good can come of it,—he'll leave you for some
|
||
other woman some day." Sarah turned nasty, said she was sorry she had
|
||
told me so much, that all I said against him only made her like him the
|
||
more; and so leaving me in sorrow she went away.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Now that I felt sure she was going away, I could not see too much of
|
||
her; morning, noon, and night I had her. She brought her two children to
|
||
me, and very proud she was of them. How it was I never noticed the marks
|
||
of childbirth on her before I know not, but I never had. I spoke of
|
||
that now. "I took good care you should not," said she smiling, and I
|
||
recollected that when I had her by the side of the bed, when I looked at
|
||
her on the sofa, it was nearly always with her back to the light; when
|
||
laying on the bed, and I tried to gratify my passion by opening her
|
||
thighs, and gazing on her hidden charms, she nearly always half-turned
|
||
towards the window, and her belly was in shadow. "I don't like to be
|
||
pulled about,—I won't have it,—if you want me have me, and have done
|
||
with it,—get another woman if you like who will do it, or allow it,—I
|
||
won't." These and similar answers always settled me, and I submitted,
|
||
for I was under her domination, and in my folly I had actually feared
|
||
that if I persisted, she would not come to see me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She brought her children in the morning to me at J...s Street, and I
|
||
had her that afternoon. Now she was free enough, pointed herself to the
|
||
marks of childbirth (very slight they were), and voluptuously held
|
||
her cunt-lips open,—she had never done so before. From that day and
|
||
afterwards she allowed me to see her in every way or manner, if not
|
||
to let me do what I wished. The mystery was over, I knew most if not
|
||
all,—certainly all about her person.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0014"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XIV.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Poses plastiques.—Sarah departs.—My despair.—Hannah's
|
||
comfort.—Foolscap and masturbation.—Cheap cunt.—A
|
||
Mulatto.—The baudy house accounts.—Concerning Sarah.—The
|
||
parlour.—The gay ladies there.—My virtue.—Louisa Fisher.—
|
||
A show of legs.—The consequence on me.—Effect on Mrs. X..i.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I dined with Sarah repeatedly until her departure, she was now often in
|
||
low spirits, and drank very freely of champagne; then would fuck with
|
||
a passion and energy which did not seem natural to her, for by look and
|
||
general manner one would have sworn she was even tempered, and without
|
||
much passion,—had I not found that out by experience? One night soon
|
||
after she had brought her children to me, she seemed wild with lust.
|
||
What was the matter with me I don't know, but I had no desire for her,
|
||
and could scarcely stiffen for the embrace; yet she was in ecstacies
|
||
with me as I fucked her. "Do it again," said she. "I can't." "You must
|
||
do it,—I've not washed." "I can't." "Yes,—yes.—I'm mad for you,"
|
||
said she,—and we kept on fucking till early the next morning. "I am in
|
||
the family way again I think," said she as she left, "and if so will
|
||
jump over Westminster Bridge." But she was not, and after that night she
|
||
persuaded me not to spend in her, but to withdraw just as my emission
|
||
took place. "It will spoil all my plans if I am in the family way," said
|
||
she, "all I have done will be of no use if I cannot act." "Act?" "Yes, I
|
||
am an actress." "Does not your husband spend in you?" "No one has spent
|
||
in me but you, since my miscarriage,—I won't let him, and he doesn't
|
||
want me in the family way."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You an actress!" "Yes,—have you never seen me?" "No." "Are you sure?"
|
||
"Yes." "Did you ever see the Poses plastiques and Madame W...t.n?" "Yes,
|
||
two or three years ago." "Well I was one of her troupe." "God God!—and
|
||
what do you do now?" "Nothing,—but we have a troupe going on the
|
||
Continent,—I am the principal—I am Madame W...t.n now."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she told me she had in her youth been a model for artists, had sat
|
||
to Etty and Frost, hers was the form which had been painted in many of
|
||
their pictures,—and then she would say no more.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I grew sadder and sadder as the time came for her departure; so did she.
|
||
She said I worried and unsettled her; she wondered sometimes if she
|
||
were doing the best thing for herself and children or not. She was so
|
||
frightened lest she should get in the family way, that as already said
|
||
she made me withdraw before the critical moment, spending my sperm on
|
||
her thighs or on the crisp hair of her motte. I got an idea into my head
|
||
(a stupid one enough), that if she were to get in the family way by me
|
||
she would stay in London; and one night after we had dined, and she had
|
||
had pleasure in my groping, and as usual had said, "Now don't do it in
|
||
me," I plunged my prick up, and spent a full stream in her cunt. "I hope
|
||
to God that sperm's all up your womb," said I. Her own pleasure had so
|
||
overcome her, that she could not move for a minute; then jumping up she
|
||
washed herself with a sponge,—she recently had used one. I never had a
|
||
spend in her again for months afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then for hours I used to look her over and over from head to foot, as if
|
||
I wished to recollect every part of her person for ever afterwards: the
|
||
roots of her hair, the ears, the way the hair grew on the nape of her
|
||
neck; the way it grew on her cunt, and in her arm-pits, and every other
|
||
part I used to look over as if searching for something; the only part of
|
||
her which escaped my investigations was the bum-furrow, which was to me
|
||
an uncomfortable part in all women, and in my wildest sexual ecstacies
|
||
and aberrations I neither felt it nor saw it, and don't know whether the
|
||
hole was round or square; red or brown.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After she had told me she had sat as a model, she brought me a small
|
||
oil-painting of herself made by an artist of some rank. She was proud of
|
||
it, and so was her husband. I offered such a price for it, that placed
|
||
as she was she could not resist, and I bought it. She gave me one day a
|
||
photograph of herself; both had the characteristic opening of the lips
|
||
well shown. It is only recently that I have destroyed these mementos of
|
||
a dead affection.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When I saw that nothing would keep her in England I did my best to
|
||
help her enterprise, gave her money freely, paid for dresses, boots,
|
||
travelling cloaks, children's dresses, and in brief for everything.
|
||
During the nine months I had known her she in fact ran me dry, and in
|
||
debt. I spent upon her more than I could have lived on for four years
|
||
at the rate I lived at just before I met her. But I was now in better
|
||
circumstances than I had been for years, and the money was my own.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
As the time approached, I could neither sleep nor eat, and used to be
|
||
at J... s Street hours before I knew she could come; would wait any
|
||
time for her, treating Hannah and the ladies, and doing nothing but talk
|
||
about Sarah. Sometimes I used to think about following her abroad. When
|
||
she came to the house, I used to spend my time in crying, and she after
|
||
telling me not to be foolish, would cry too. Then, "Oh! let me see you
|
||
naked." "There then." Then came kisses all over her body. "Oh! now for
|
||
God's sake don't spend in me." Then came a delicious fuck; then crying
|
||
and moaning recommenced. She left a week at least before she had said
|
||
she should, and did so to prevent me the pain of parting with her,—I
|
||
must give her that credit. Hannah told me so.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had arranged to see her one morning, and was as usual there before
|
||
my time. Hannah stepped out from the parlour. "Has Sarah come?" She
|
||
beckoned me into the parlour. "Why they all sailed this morning,—my
|
||
sister went to see them off,—did you not know?" I staggered to the
|
||
sofa dizzy, speechless, then senseless. When I came to myself Hannah was
|
||
standing besides me with brandy and water and a spoon with which she was
|
||
putting it into my mouth.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't take on so," said she, "don't think any more about Sarah,—she is
|
||
a fine woman, but there are lots as good,—I know a dozen, and any one
|
||
would be glad to know a man like you,—have some brandy and water,"—and
|
||
she took a great gulp herself. "There now," said she bending over me.
|
||
"would you like to see Mrs.———, she who met you the other night in
|
||
here with Sarah,—she has taken quite a fancy to you,—don't cry. Sarah
|
||
will come back, and if she don't you'll get another woman whom you will
|
||
like as well. There is Mrs.———, a splendid shaped woman who only sees
|
||
one gentleman here,—she took quite a fancy to you, though she only saw
|
||
you once." But I was desperate, and rushed out of the house. Where I
|
||
went to, I don't even recollect, but went home at last very drunk,—an
|
||
extraordinary occurence for me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
For some days I was prostrate in mind, and almost in body, but at length
|
||
recovered sufficiently to attend a little to my affairs which had gone
|
||
altogether to the bad for a month, and had been going bad for many
|
||
months. I resolutely set myself against going to J... s Street, and
|
||
would not have women; indeed scarcely knew where to lay my hand on
|
||
a shilling, so necessity had perhaps as much to do with my virtue as
|
||
anything else; but I was generally in a weak, low state of health, and
|
||
really believe, though it seems to me almost incredible now, that it was
|
||
well nigh three weeks before I touched or saw a cunt after Sarah left.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then one Sunday I had erections all day long. After dinner lust drove me
|
||
nearly mad; so I went to my room, took a clean sheet of white paper,
|
||
and frigged myself over it. My prick only slightly subsided, I frigged
|
||
again, and then as the paper lay before me covered with sperm-pools I
|
||
cried, because it was not up my dear Sarah's vagina, laid my head on
|
||
the table where the paper lay, and sobbed with despair, jealousy, and
|
||
regrets, for I thought some one would fuck her if I did not, that it
|
||
would be her hateful husband whom she had helped to keep with my money.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I may say here that on several occasions of my life I have frigged
|
||
myself over a clean sheet of foolscap paper; it was mostly done for
|
||
curiosity, to see what my sperm was like, whether it was as thin, or
|
||
as thick, or as large in quantity as at the last time I previously had
|
||
masturbated.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I could not after that Sunday keep away from J...s Street, and went
|
||
there the next day. "I don't expect she'll write to you," said Hannah,
|
||
"even if she said she would,—what will be the use?—it will only make
|
||
you miserable." But I felt sure she would, and kept away from women
|
||
still for some time after that,—I was stumped for money among other
|
||
reasons. Then I began to spend involuntarily in the night, which to me
|
||
was more hateful than frigging myself; so one night I went out for a bit
|
||
of cheap quim. Whether I saw Brighton Bessie or not I can't say, but I
|
||
think I did, and did later on.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I went first into the streets near a large well-known tavern at a
|
||
spot where several big thoroughfares meet, and where there is a large
|
||
traffic, and picked up my cheap women there. But the women, their
|
||
chemises and petticoats, and their rooms shocked me more than they used,
|
||
and kept me chaster than I otherwise might have been.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night I went home with a tall straight woman who would not take my
|
||
fee. "No," said she, "I've got two nice little rooms of my own." If you
|
||
get a woman for five shillings you have to pay for the room besides, and
|
||
ten shillings is only a small sum; so I went with her for ten shillings,
|
||
and saw her at intervals for a few months.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was about five feet nine high, was not stout, was as straight as a
|
||
lath, yet not thin, had very firm but quite small breasts, and a
|
||
biggish bum. She had Mulatto blood in her veins she told me, and was
|
||
brown-skinned, had a large mouth and <i>very</i> thick lips, the Negro blood
|
||
showed there plainly; her hair was dark, and so were her eyes; her cunt
|
||
was a pouter: it was small, but the lips pouted out more thickly I think
|
||
than those of any woman I ever yet saw, yet they were not flabby, but
|
||
protruded largely like two halves of a sausage; the hair was black,
|
||
short, and intensely crisp and curly; it felt like curled horse-hair.
|
||
I used to think her a plain woman, one of the plainest, but she was a
|
||
glorious fuckster; her cunt was tight inside, and yet so elastic as not
|
||
to hurt or pinch (and I was at that time when just at spunking point as
|
||
often said before tender-pricked). The hair of her head was coarse yet
|
||
straight, her large mouth was filled with teeth of a splendid whiteness,
|
||
and when she smiled she showed the whole set. It was seeing her large
|
||
white teeth that first attracted me before I could distinguish any other
|
||
feature of her face; you could see them at night right across a road,
|
||
they were dazzling, and almost made one forget the great thick-lipped
|
||
orifice which opened to expose them. I have before told of women who
|
||
attracted me by their teeth, and particularly of a Creole.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This <i>Mulatto</i> as I called her, amused me with her letcherous postures;
|
||
she was as lithe as a willow branch, and was willing to please. I was
|
||
fond of making her kneel on the bed with bum towards me, and her legs
|
||
nearly close together, and then the backward pout of her cunt was
|
||
charming to me, so much so that I took to poking her dog-fashion.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night when I was full of sperm I made her remain in the exact
|
||
posture until all my spunk had run out of her cunt, and sat holding a
|
||
candle towards her rump till I was satisfied with the sight; and more
|
||
than once I kept her in that position, looking at the gruelly lips until
|
||
I fucked her a second time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She had such a very remarkable steady walk that she scarcely seemed to
|
||
move, she glided; her feet were so nicely carried forward, and her body
|
||
so evenly balanced from her hips. In this respect she resembled a tall
|
||
dark woman named Fletcher, whom I knew quite recently. There must have
|
||
been something in the arrangement of their thighs and hips which caused
|
||
this. Women who are accustomed to carry heavy loads on their heads
|
||
always walk straight, and never roll from side to side as most people
|
||
more or less do; but I don't know that either of the women named had
|
||
carried baskets on their heads,—I knew the walk of that class of women,
|
||
having been born in the neighbourhood where they worked.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She I imagine had a liking for my doing it naked with her, for she
|
||
was always suggesting that we should strip; but she could not bear my
|
||
fucking her dog-fashion. When I stripped and got into her on her belly,
|
||
she would twist her legs right into mine in quite a snaky fashion,
|
||
and sometimes lift her legs up till her heels were almost up to my
|
||
blade-bones. She also like a few others I have poked seemed to have
|
||
the power of holding my prick in her cunt quite tightly after I had
|
||
spent,—perhaps because she had not spent herself, for about her
|
||
pleasures in the copulation I am not sure, though she always impressed
|
||
me as being a hot-cunted one.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After I had once been to J... s Street again I went more and more
|
||
frequently. Hannah was always nearly screwed,—champagne or brandy
|
||
pleased her best.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When she was so, she would at times gradually let out much that she
|
||
knew,—and this is what she let out one day.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Bah! her husband indeed!—she is not married,—he's got a wife besides,
|
||
and Sarah knows it,—he's blackened his wife's eyes more than once when
|
||
she has been annoying them; but that don't pay, for she is his lawful
|
||
wife; so he allows her something, and it keeps her quiet, and she won't
|
||
last long, for she is drunk from daybreak till night. Sarah's a real
|
||
good one to keep the lazy beggar,—she keeps them all poor thing, ever
|
||
since he could not get any engagement; there's she, and their children,
|
||
and her sister, who lives with them, and then there is her old mother
|
||
who she keeps, and his wife as well,—she has enough to do poor thing."
|
||
This came out one day after Hannah had dined; I had brought her a bottle
|
||
of specially fine brandy, and we were sitting in the parlour drinking it
|
||
together mixed with water.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had long been getting into Hannah's good graces. I stood wine and
|
||
brandy, was always respectful to her and the gay ladies I met in her
|
||
parlour, and never used coarse, rude language to them, nor in speaking
|
||
of them or of ladies of their class. Hannah told me I was a great
|
||
favorite with several of them, as indeed I found to be the case. I may
|
||
say that all my life I never spoke disrespectfully to, or of gay ladies,
|
||
so long as they behaved themselves; they have been mostly throughout my
|
||
life, kind and true to me after their fashion, they gave me pleasure,
|
||
and I treated them as if I was grateful for it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But I was moreover serviceable to Hannah. Once or twice as told she had
|
||
brought me some figures to cast up, and when Sarah had left, she brought
|
||
me others on various little scraps of paper. She asked me never to
|
||
mention my having done so to her sister, and I did not. I became curious
|
||
at finding the items were all in five shillings, seven and sixpence, ten
|
||
and twenty shillings; at last it struck me what it was, and taxing her
|
||
with it found it was the takings of the baudy house, she told me so with
|
||
a laugh. She could not write herself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The takings were put on slips of paper by the servants, and by some
|
||
process of her own which she could not explain, she got a rough sort of
|
||
check on the servants to prevent them robbing her. She had to account to
|
||
the real owner of the house,—and how she did it she alone knows. This
|
||
is certain (she once admitted it), that from the takings she put a pound
|
||
a day into her own pocket. Whether she robbed the owner to that extent,
|
||
or whether it was her admitted share I never knew. She was well dressed,
|
||
had excellent food, allowed her Guardsman money, her sister's husband
|
||
money, and others too I rather think. But after she'd taken her three or
|
||
four hundred pounds a year, there was a splendid income handed over to
|
||
some one. This house had but eight rooms, and two more closets to let
|
||
out for fucking; they often took twenty pounds a day, and sometimes much
|
||
more.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I did this arithmetic pretty regularly, and she became my fast friend.
|
||
She told me all about Sarah that she knew (what Sarah at a future day
|
||
told me agreed with it), and much about the habits of other loose ladies
|
||
which will be partially narrated in due time, and a good deal about
|
||
baudy house management.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
And now more about Sarah's antecedents. A new species of entertainment
|
||
had sprung into existence a few years before this time, called "Poses
|
||
plastiques," in which men and women covered with silk fitting tightly to
|
||
their naked limbs and made quite white, placed themselves on stages in
|
||
classical groups to the sound of music. Women and men of great physical
|
||
beauty formed these groups, they were in fact actors of that class.
|
||
Madame W...t.n known as a splendid model first got them up; her husband
|
||
was a splendid man, Sarah was her niece, and also had a beautiful form
|
||
which ran in the family; she was poor, and Madame W...t.n took her to
|
||
live with them, and at seventeen years of age she appeared as Venus.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At nineteen she had a child by Madame W...t.n's husband, at twenty a
|
||
second. Madame found out the father, and kicked Sarah out. Mr. W...t.n
|
||
then kicked Madame out, and went to live with Sarah, rows ensued, other
|
||
companies of "Poses plastiques" came into competition, the thing got
|
||
overdone, he could not get his living; he knew a trade, but was I expect
|
||
too lazy to work at it; so Sarah took to letting herself out as model,
|
||
and that being poor pay, to letting out her cunt to get their bread; she
|
||
had just began it when I first met her. They seem during a year or more
|
||
to have parted with all their goods, before she took to showing her
|
||
belly-parting for money.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
So beautiful a form of course succeeded, and for a time I became the
|
||
principal milk-cow. Then a proposition was made to form a troupe to go
|
||
to the Continent; there seemed to be a grand opening, and with Sarah's
|
||
money (most of it got from me), the apparatus, costumes properties, and
|
||
troupe were got together.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Off they had gone. She and her husband were the exhibition-managers,
|
||
speculators, and chief actors.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Hannah made a mouth when I asked what sort of a man Mavis was. She
|
||
did not think much of him,—why did he not work—he had a trade?—no,
|
||
because he was no longer able to get on as an actor, he preferred to let
|
||
Sarah get the living for the whole of them. "Ah! you'll see her back,
|
||
mark my words,—they won't succeed,—and then what will take place?
|
||
—you'll see,—is she poor thing to work and do everything, that he may
|
||
lay a bed, dress as a gentleman, and do nothing but take her out for a
|
||
walk on a Sunday; she is as proud of his taking her out for a walk on a
|
||
Sunday as if he kept her a carriage." After much reflexion I came to the
|
||
conclusion that Sarah had only just turned harlot about the time I had
|
||
first met her that she did it to keep her man and her family, and he got
|
||
accustomed to his woman getting his living for him.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I kept on calling at J... s Street, always expecting to hear of Sarah.
|
||
Hannah was glad to see me, for now I cast up her accounts weekly. I got
|
||
acquainted with two or three ladies there who came at intervals to meet
|
||
their friends. They were very nice women, none were ever to be seen in
|
||
the streets, they had either their own acquaintances whom they met at
|
||
J... s Street, or Hannah had introduced them to gentlemen there. They
|
||
were not a bit like whores in dress, appearance or manner, and my
|
||
acquaintance with them opened my mind to the fact, that there is a large
|
||
amount of occult fucking going on with needy, middle-class women, whose
|
||
mode of living and dressing, is a mystery to their friends, and who
|
||
mingle with their own class of society without its being suspected;
|
||
that their cunts are ever wetted by sperm which lawfully may not be put
|
||
there.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I began to stand wine when I met them, and was introduced as a friend of
|
||
Miss Mavis who had gone abroad. I was I found well known by name and
|
||
a character for kindness, and I expect also for being a fool. All the
|
||
women were shy at first, Hannah's sister (the servant) I overheard
|
||
telling Hannah that the ladies did not like my being in the parlour.
|
||
Hannah at times would ask me to leave, as a lady wanted to come into the
|
||
parlour and wait there, and so on. But gradually Hannah would say, "Who
|
||
is it?—oh! she knows him,"—or "Oh! she won't mind,—let her come in."
|
||
So by degrees I became intimate with these privately gay ladies, and
|
||
several of them on more than one occasion joined their sweet bodies to
|
||
mine in the game of under and over.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had never had a woman in the house since Sarah had gone; firstly
|
||
because I did not then pay more for the girls than I did for the room
|
||
alone at J... s Street, and because, I feared if Sarah came back Hannah
|
||
would tell her,—as if it would have mattered to Sarah in any way
|
||
excepting that another woman would get the money she might have had.
|
||
Still I had that stupid idea about the matter, and although I had
|
||
longed for one or two of the other ladies, and although they had looked
|
||
languishingly at me. I never had then proposed a private interview
|
||
upstairs.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One day Hannah said she had heard from Sarah who had asked after me.
|
||
"They are (Sarah and the troupe) getting on well," said Hannah, "if she
|
||
says so I suppose they are,—but we shall see." Suddenly, "Have you had
|
||
another woman since she left?" The question startled me. "No." "Oh!
|
||
I don't believe it,—if you haven't you're a nasty man." Then I
|
||
confessed, and told her what I had done. "Why don't you have Mrs.
|
||
Fisher?" said she. "I'm poor, and can't,—I'm not going to do what I did
|
||
with Sarah." "Lord she won't mind,—she'd like you I know,—but don't
|
||
say I said so,—she's got a lovely leg,—she's a fine woman,—nearly as
|
||
fine made as Sarah Mavis, and she is taller,—she never gets it done at
|
||
home." Hannah was unusually muddled with liquor that day, and let out;
|
||
her sister was not there to check her with, "Now then Hannah you'd
|
||
better shut up,"—and Hannah described Mrs. Fisher's hidden charms till
|
||
my cock stood.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I would pass hours sketching from recollection Sarah Mavis' limbs and
|
||
form, her bum and cunt being the most favorite subjects; then so randy
|
||
that I did not know what to do with myself, I would rush out into the
|
||
streets to prevent my frigging myself,—and erotic night-dreams were
|
||
frequent.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Why don't you see Mrs. X.. i," said Hannah to me, "she likes you, and
|
||
would come up any day if I wrote to her (I had supped two or three times
|
||
with that lady),—I would not fret about Sarah, although she is a fine
|
||
woman,—you let her see you have another woman, and she will come round
|
||
if she comes back." But I did not for a time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One afternoon however being in the parlour, Mrs. X.. i was there, a
|
||
splendid woman about twenty-six years old. Also there was a young woman
|
||
who had two children by a man with whom she was about to go abroad, and
|
||
she was a lovely woman. The two ladies had just had a two o'clock dinner
|
||
with Hannah, I had just come from my Club after luncheon, and sent for
|
||
champagne. All our talk got frisky,—all knew Sarah, my love. If I could
|
||
get any one to talk with me about her, I was delighted, and began at
|
||
it. Said the Mistress, "Well she is a splendid-formed woman
|
||
certainly,—splendid, but there are lots of others,—I've got a good
|
||
leg to my knee, so has Mrs. X.. i, and Mrs.———," (meaning the other
|
||
whose name I forget).
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Show us your leg," said one. "There," said Hannah pulling up her
|
||
clothes, "now show yours." They all showed their limbs, one after
|
||
another. "You might fancy you had Sarah's legs round your thighs, if you
|
||
had Mrs. X...i's there," said Hannah. I was nigh bursting for a fuck.
|
||
Mrs. X...i pulled her clothes up higher, and stood up to show the leg
|
||
better; the other ladies did the same. I felt my pleasure coming, and
|
||
objecting to wet my shirt, began to unbutton. "Oh I can't bear it," I
|
||
cried, "oh! my God I'm coming,"—and the instant my prick was free from
|
||
my trowsers I spent copiously, the three women their petticoats still up
|
||
nearly to their cunts, looking and laughing. I had not frigged, it was
|
||
fullness, and the voluptuous delight at seeing the limbs of the three
|
||
fine women which fetched me. "There is lots of stuff in him," said one.
|
||
Ashamed of myself I begged their pardons, and sent for more wine. "He
|
||
had better have given one of you ladies that good spunk," said the
|
||
Mistress. I overcame my bash fulness, they laughed about what Sarah
|
||
Mavis had missed, one professed to feel annoyed at my behaviour. "Oh!
|
||
you are damned modest," said Hannah.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Mrs. X...i soon afterwards went upstairs into the bed-room to a
|
||
gentleman she had come to meet. The Mistress said she should lay
|
||
down,—she always did after her dinner, and slept for two hours,—she
|
||
was fuddled, and indeed always was. The mother of the two children and
|
||
I were alone; from the instant I had spent she had never taken her
|
||
eyes off me,—never. I recollect the look of her dark eyes and their
|
||
expression quite well. Hannah snored almost directly. "Let us have
|
||
a kiss," said the lady to me, "I know you are fond of a well-formed
|
||
woman,"—and she pulled up her clothes a little. She was sitting on
|
||
the sofa, my prick rose, I bolted the door, and we fucked whilst the
|
||
Mistress kept snoring.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Mrs. X... i came down. "What you here still?—what have you been doing?"
|
||
The mother replied, "He has been smoking, and talking about his dear
|
||
Sarah." The woman was actually sitting at that very moment with a flood
|
||
of my sperm up her cunt, for she had neither wiped, nor washed, nor
|
||
pissed since I had fucked her. Then they talked about X... i's friend who
|
||
was a clergyman. X... i was the wife of a man who lived with her, but
|
||
never had her (so she said); she hated him, he had clapped her once.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The mother went out of the room, and came back, Hannah awoke, we had
|
||
tea, I paid, it was my rule then to pay for everything for the ladies
|
||
whenever I was in the baudy house parlour. I rose to go, shaking hands
|
||
with the two ladies. The one whom I had embraced put a bit of paper
|
||
privately into my hand. Outside the house I read it. "Wait outside," it
|
||
said. I had been delighted with her pleasure, and did so. She came out,
|
||
we walked quickly off. "You go to the top of the next street," said she,
|
||
"and I'll meet you,"—and she went another way, and met me at the top.
|
||
"I did that in case X... i came out," said she, "let us go and have
|
||
dinner together." "I have not enough money," said I. "Never mind, I
|
||
have." We went to the Caf<61> de P..v...e, and dined; I fucked her again
|
||
and again on a sofa. She was a charming woman. As we sat on a little
|
||
sofa dallying after dinner, she said she had not had it for a month,
|
||
her friend had gone to Germany, where they were going to live, to make
|
||
arrangements, he would return in a few days; then he, she, and the
|
||
children were going to Germany with him. "I liked you," said she, "but
|
||
when I saw what you did before us this afternoon, I could scarcely stop
|
||
myself, I wanted it so badly,—I dare say I'm in the family way,—oh!
|
||
don't look,—it's full,—it's dirty,—you shan't." The next instant I
|
||
was up her again; afterwards she washed, and I saw her cunt. I paid
|
||
for the dinner partly, she the rest,—I had not a sixpence left. "I'm
|
||
sorry," I said to her, "that I have no more money." "I did not come here
|
||
for money," said she. "Let me leave you half a dozen pair of gloves at
|
||
No. 11." "No, I've lots of gloves." "Then give me a kiss." She stood
|
||
putting her tongue in my mouth for a minute, then giving me a hearty
|
||
kiss off she went. I never saw her, nor had her again. Hannah told me
|
||
she was in Germany, and very happy there.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0015"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XV.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Louisa Fisher.—Chaffing.—Her form and fucking.—A supper
|
||
in bed.—A lascivious night.—Meetings afterwards.—Hannah's
|
||
legs.—Intruders in the bed-room.—Louisa's voluptuousness.—
|
||
Enceinte.—Her husband.—Her gentleman friend.—About
|
||
herself.—Illness.—Mrs. A... y.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I began to meet a Mrs. Fisher at the house very frequently; why she was
|
||
more frequently there I did not know, and knew it was but of little use
|
||
asking questions why.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I rather liked this lady. She came usually at one o'clock, and had
|
||
dinner with Hannah. At three o'clock she went upstairs, was there about
|
||
two hours, then came down and went away. At times she waited, had tea,
|
||
and sometimes early supper; this was when she was expecting some one
|
||
who did not come. I was told confidentially by Hannah it was a rich
|
||
middle-aged clergyman. The ladies name was Mrs. Louisa Fisher,—her
|
||
christian name I have written truly, the surname is not. I do this lest
|
||
she be alive still, and should read somehow this result of my doings
|
||
with her at J...s Street; she can't mistake if she reads these pages who
|
||
it was.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After what Hannah had told me I could not help taking a great deal of
|
||
notice of this lady, and began to lust for her, and of course took to
|
||
talking to her about Sarah. She was nothing loth, and asked me curious,
|
||
and at last down right indecent questions about her, but not in smutty
|
||
language. Hannah when there used to laugh at the questions and my
|
||
replies; they made my cock stand, which perhaps was what Louisa
|
||
intended, or it may only have been curiosity without any hidden
|
||
intention.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I imagine that the erotic incident in the parlour had been told to a
|
||
good many gay ladies; it certainly had to Louisa Fisher, for one night
|
||
after that I had been to enquire if Hannah had heard again from Sarah,
|
||
and Hannah had mentioned Louisa, the following occurred. I had dined
|
||
early, it was about half-past six, Louisa Fisher was there. "Stand us
|
||
a glass of wine," said she. "Do," said Hannah. "Do," said another
|
||
lady. "Have you had dinner Mrs. Fisher?" said I. "No, my friend's not
|
||
been,—I'm hungry, and Hannah is just going to cook me a chop." I myself
|
||
fetched a bottle of sherry, the chop came, Louisa ate it, and drank
|
||
sherry; then I sent for brandy, we drank it mixed with water, and Hannah
|
||
took some neat. I had began about Sarah as I always did. "Well she was
|
||
a beautiful model," said Hannah, "but Mrs. X... i's leg was better to my
|
||
mind." "Look how he's blushing," said Louisa. "Why should I blush?" They
|
||
both laughed. "Oh! oh! oh! don't I know what you did when you saw her
|
||
legs." I was then that odd mixture of baudiness and modesty, that I was
|
||
just as likely to be bold as to be shame-faced, when a woman spoke to me
|
||
about anything carnal; and now was confused and half-ashamed. "Lord
|
||
how he's blushing," said Hannah, and she left the room to look after
|
||
business, she usually put her head out when the street-door opened, if a
|
||
servant was not in the way on the ground-floor.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Louisa laughed. "I know all bout it," said she, "she was a fine woman."
|
||
After I had got over the stupid bashfulness which I had for the moment,
|
||
I went (as usual with me) to the extreme of baudy boldness. "Yes," said
|
||
I laughing, "I wish it had been spilt in her cunt, instead of on the
|
||
carpet." "Oh! for shame," said Louisa, "well it was waste, was it
|
||
not,—it might have made two people happy,—did you really spend without
|
||
frigging it?" "Yes I did."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I got close to Louisa on the sofa to speak with her about the event, to
|
||
hear from her lips what had been told her. She said not a word, but my
|
||
face was close to hers, we looked into each other's eyes for a minute,
|
||
lust was on both. I put my arm round her, pulled her towards me, and
|
||
kissed her. She returned it, our lips were glued together. "You've got
|
||
a fine leg Hannah says." "Does she?" "Yes,—let me see it." "No."
|
||
"Yes." "You only care about Sarah." I made no reply, but went on kissing
|
||
letcherously, put one hand down, and going on kissing pulled her clothes
|
||
up to her knees. She stopped me there. "Oh! how round, how nice,
|
||
how lovely your leg is." "Now be quiet, Hannah will be in." I ceased
|
||
looking, but my hand slipped higher up, my fingers were inside the
|
||
satiny wet lips, and my mouth was glued to hers, as Hannah came back.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We resumed a decent posture. Hannah laughed, "Lord why don't you two
|
||
go upstairs?" said she, "you want each other,—why don't you go?—the
|
||
first-floor front's empty." "Come," said I to Louisa pulling her. She
|
||
rose instantly. Hannah was a really good soul, she liked to make people
|
||
happy, and to set them fucking; I have seen it in a dozen instances.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Without another word we went upstairs, I threw her on the bedside,
|
||
pulled up her clothes, and opened a magnificent pair of thighs. "Let's
|
||
go to bed," said she. "Very well." We both undressed like lightning
|
||
without a word passing, and stood, she in chemise, I in shirt in a
|
||
trice. "Let's get in naked." Without reply she drew off her chemise as
|
||
I pulled off my shirt, and the next minute naked in each other's arms we
|
||
were fucking in a warm bed, not a word of conversation passing till we
|
||
had spent, those moments are so soul-absorbing in their lasciviousness.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! how quick we've been,—lay still." With mutual consent we kept
|
||
together in fleshy conjunction, I nestled my balls up her, she tightened
|
||
her cunt to stimulate my shrinking organ. But little stimulus was
|
||
needed, our spend had only made us want it again, we had scarcely rested
|
||
ere we recommenced fucking, and again we spent before my prick had
|
||
uncunted. How lovely, how exquisite is the reminiscence! What equals
|
||
the pleasure of a man and woman pleased with each other, thrilling with
|
||
lust, when prick and cunt are joined, and they spend in each other's
|
||
arms!
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Still she would not let me out of her, crossing her limbs over my
|
||
thighs, drawing me closer to her by her hands, grasping my arse-cheeks,
|
||
pulling the cheeks almost open, squeezing her cunt up to me, she kept me
|
||
up her, kissing me, shoving her tongue towards mine, and saying I was a
|
||
lovely poke, the first baudy words that dropped from her, I rubbing
|
||
my belly up against hers till my balls almost lay between her fat
|
||
cunt-lips, swabbing up the oozings of the sperm which ran out from her.
|
||
And so we lay, kissing, tongue-sucking, and talking the stinging words
|
||
of love and lust.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then as repose became a pleasure, and nature severed us. "Oh! my God how
|
||
wet you have made me," she said, "it's all on the sheet." "Let me feel."
|
||
I felt on my side, she turned on hers towards me, and threw one leg over
|
||
my haunch, I placed my hand on her cunt, and felt the sperm, wetting
|
||
my hand, whilst she grasped my slippery prick. "Feel how wet your prick
|
||
is," I put my hand there, and every hair on my prick was plastered
|
||
against my belly; then hand on cunt, and hand on prick we both dozed
|
||
off.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When I awakened we were still face to face, Louisa asleep with a hand
|
||
under my balls. I pulled down the clothes to look at her naked body: the
|
||
gas was burning brightly, I saw splendid breasts; down went my hand to
|
||
her cunt, I groped it, she awoke, and without a word turned on to her
|
||
back, and I on to her belly. Whilst couched easily on to that broad
|
||
belly, and lying between her ample breasts, and steadied by her large
|
||
thighs, my prick lying down against her gap, kissing and sucking each
|
||
other's mouths, she glided her hand down, and introduced my pendulous
|
||
doodle to her randy cunt, and again we fucked. We were mad for it,
|
||
neither of us uttered a word, till she cried out, "Oh! I'm coming,—my
|
||
God,—ah!" And then we spent, and went fast asleep again, exhausted with
|
||
the pleasure.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We were awakened by a knock. "Who's there?" "Hannah." "What do you
|
||
want?" "Are you going to stop all night?" "No," said I jumping out of
|
||
bed, "what o'clock is it?" "It's half-past twelve." "Come to bed," said
|
||
Louisa. In I jumped. "Oh! I'm so hungry," said she, "how I should like
|
||
some oysters." "So should I,—get up, and we'll go and have some before
|
||
the shop closes." "No, stop here, Hannah will get them." I agreed,
|
||
ordered them, and we went on twiddling each other's privates, I
|
||
recollect the feel of hers at this very moment,—it was like a
|
||
paste-pot.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had never seen her person yet. The throwing her on to the bed, and
|
||
lifting her clothes, her stripping, and jumping into bed had been so
|
||
rapid, and so randy had both of us been, so anxious to copulate, that I
|
||
had had no time to look, to contemplate, to enjoy her with my eyesight.
|
||
Now off went the bed clothes. "Let's look at your cunt." "I won't till
|
||
I've washed." "No now." I pulled one thigh. "No you dirty dog,—it's
|
||
not nice." She jumped out of bed, and washed her quim, I my prick, we
|
||
pissed, and then she threw herself on the bed, and delivered her body up
|
||
to me. When I had had a quarter of an hour's investigation, she amused
|
||
herself with looking and pulling my prick about, waiting for our supper.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was a very fine tall woman, stout and well-built. She said she was
|
||
twenty-four, but I believe she was thirty. She looked less stout with
|
||
her clothes on than when she was undressed, for I was much surprised to
|
||
see how very big she was when naked. She had a very big arm, her thighs
|
||
and legs were very big as well. Hannah was right about it, the entire
|
||
legs were grand, but had not the exquisite curves of Sarah Mavis'. Her
|
||
bum was proportionate to her thighs, her waist was not nearly small
|
||
enough, her breasts were very large, and beautifully placed, and
|
||
beautifully solid; her face was large and common-place, she had
|
||
grey eyes, and lightest auburn hair,—immense in quantity, which was
|
||
pleasing, though not handsome; it was not a face which in the streets
|
||
would have attracted me. Her teeth were good.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The hair on her cunt, which was thick-lipped and pouting, was also of a
|
||
lightish auburn, not by any means a colour to my taste when between the
|
||
thighs,—so many women's cunts are furnished with that colour. It was
|
||
thick, longish, soft in feel, large in quantity, and spread half-way up
|
||
to her navel, and square across her belly to the line of her thighs. I
|
||
guessed it a thirty year old cunt from that. She was a lovely fucker,
|
||
and though her cunt was a large one inside and out; the prick was well
|
||
clipped by it, and kept in when its business was done. There was such
|
||
room to lie on her between her thighs, and all seemed so well placed
|
||
to hold a man, that I often thought of her in after time when fucking
|
||
Sarah, who was the very reverse; who always made me bend my back when
|
||
fucking, and from whose quim my prick would always slip, unless we both
|
||
made some effort to retain it after I had spent. Sarah rarely did that,
|
||
hating the muck. Indeed when Sarah was randy, and wagged her arse as she
|
||
did violently, all of a sudden just before she spent, she often threw my
|
||
stiff prick out, which set me off damning and cursing till it was up her
|
||
again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The oysters came, and champagne with them, we went to bed again, and sat
|
||
in chemise and shirt to eat them, said I, "let's have another fuck naked
|
||
again," for the touch of her large fleshy body to mine had entranced
|
||
me, and thus we fucked. Another doze. "Ulloh! why it's three o'clock,—I
|
||
must be off." "Don't go dear,—stop all night." "I can't,—they will
|
||
think I am ill." "So they will me, but I can't go home, I live too far
|
||
off,—do stop all night with me, there's a darling," said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Instead of a doze we had slept two hours. I at times stopped out all
|
||
night, and never without saying I intended to do so, but I was tired and
|
||
sleepy. "Oh! don't go." I put on my shirt. "Well let's have another
|
||
poke before you go,—the champagne has made me so randy." It had also
|
||
operated on me. I looked, there were her breasts naked just peeping
|
||
above the bedclothes, one arm out, the hand under her head, the big
|
||
white fleshy arm, and the thick sandy brown hair in the armpits. "Come,"
|
||
said she uncovering to her knees. Off went my shirt, and jumping into
|
||
bed the thighs received me, the voluptuous tongue and round, soft,
|
||
wet lips glued themselves on to mine again, and heaving gently we were
|
||
already on the way to another spend. My God what work, what prolonged
|
||
pleasure!—I forgot Sarah Mavis, and every other woman that night
|
||
in the arms of Louisa. In baudy amusement we passed the whole night
|
||
together, and I awakened at ten the next morning with the need of going
|
||
as fast as I could to shit.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I came back, washed, and we fucked again; then she went as she said to
|
||
speak to Hannah, whom I knew was a bed at that time; she went I knew to
|
||
empty herself, but I asked no questions. We had ham and coffee in bed,
|
||
and more fucking, and about one o'clock we rose and left. My finger must
|
||
have smelt of cunt I should think for twenty-four hours afterwards, for
|
||
I had scarcely left Louisa's cunt for eighteen hours; if my prick was
|
||
not up her my fingers were, when not asleep. Whether spunk was in it
|
||
or not was all the same, there was no objecting, she gave way to my
|
||
insistance, and we lay at intervals, she feeling my prick, one of
|
||
her legs placed over mine, and my hand between her thighs, both of us
|
||
kissing, tongue-sucking, and scarcely talking. I barely recollect our
|
||
talk at all,—it was one long baudy night; how many times we fucked I
|
||
can't say, but it was one of my great exercises. She was tired, and so
|
||
was I, yet at the last moment, "Let's try it again," I said: "No, I'm
|
||
sore, and in pain," said she. I sometimes think my prick must have been
|
||
nearly a dozen times up her, and when ramming stiff for a long time
|
||
without spending she murmured, "Oh! pray dear leave off."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We fucked in no other fashion than belly to belly, we were naked the
|
||
whole night, and did nothing outside the bed. When I had paid for the
|
||
room, supper and breakfast, I only had a few shillings left. I told her.
|
||
"Never mind," said she, "you shall give me some money some day when I am
|
||
hard up;" so I paid her nothing then.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I recollect all this distinctly, I always do the incidents of a first
|
||
night with a female. When I am accustomed to them, the more striking
|
||
circumstances of our acquaintance remain in my memory. It seems to
|
||
me that first night's incidents will always remain fresh in my
|
||
recollection, excepting the number of fucks; I recollect up to about
|
||
half-a-dozen, then I lose count, there my memory of a first night alone
|
||
fails me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I took a liking for Louisa. For nearly a year I had borne with the
|
||
frigidity of Sarah and her tyranny, "You shall only do it once,—I
|
||
won't,—I can't wait,—well go," were commands I had got accustomed to
|
||
obey, had bowed to refusals to allow her secret charms to be looked
|
||
at time after time, to have my prick ejected before the last injecting
|
||
throb had been given. I liked the woman, doted on her exquisite form,
|
||
liked the domesticity of sitting and reading to her, and at the same
|
||
time just feeling her cunt whilst she laid on the sofa, because I liked
|
||
her conversation, and because I was at times rewarded by rapturous
|
||
delight when she abandoned herself body and soul to me, I submitted to
|
||
all this. But I often rebelled, wished it was otherwise, and made up
|
||
my mind to leave her for other women, yet did not. I have said all this
|
||
before.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Now to have a splendidly made woman, who had as much pleasure with me as
|
||
I had with her, was overwhelming. I forgot Sarah for a time, and longed
|
||
for the repetition of the baudy, voluptuous hours I had had with the
|
||
big-armed, big-thighed Louisa, and counted the days till we met again.
|
||
The instant I set eyes upon her we went upstairs. "Let's get into bed."
|
||
Then it was a race who undressed the first. "Naked?" "Yes naked." She
|
||
laughed. "Look at your thing," said she as sitting down she pissed. It
|
||
was stiff as a poker; the next minute I was laying bedded on that soft
|
||
fleshy form, and we were spending. What a fat, luscious, and grand cunt
|
||
she had, though three fingers went up it easily.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then to my delight she threw up her limbs a little, and crossing them
|
||
over me pressed her cunt close up to my willing cock-roots; and there
|
||
we lay, my prick in her, my balls covering her arse-hole; whilst now
|
||
and then she gripped my prick by muscular cuntal action. When her tongue
|
||
touched mine, she sometimes ran her lithsome tongue over my teeth, or
|
||
under my lips, and along my gums,—it was a peculiarity of hers. Then
|
||
she would glue her wet lips to my wet lips, till our salivas mingled,
|
||
and ran profusely, stimulating our lusts. Thus we enjoyed each other's
|
||
bodies, till another fuck dissolved us, and separated our spunk-soaked
|
||
genitals; and she got up, washed, and went away sometimes in a great
|
||
hurry.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Soon I grumbled at her going so, and she promised to stop a longer
|
||
time. "Have a shoulder of mutton," said she, "and onion sauce,—I love
|
||
it,—Hannah will cook it beautifully,—we will dine at two o'clock,
|
||
Hannah with us." So it came about; we three sat down to a shoulder.
|
||
Louisa liked sherry, Hannah brandy; I brought both of fine quality, we
|
||
gorged, Hannah got slightly tight, observing Louisa and I caressing.
|
||
"Ah!" said she, "I envy you, you two going to bed." "Why where is Jack?"
|
||
"Oh! at Windsor, and I shan't have a bit for a month at least." "You'll
|
||
have to frig yourself," said I joking. "That's better than nothing, but
|
||
I like the wetting best." Louisa laughed, and used afterwards to say to
|
||
Hannah, "Has Jack given you a wetting?" Later on some other free ladies
|
||
took up the joke, and Hannah's "wetting" became a bye-word among the
|
||
circle of free, mercenary lovers.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Dinner over we hurried upstairs, and we went naked to bed. This was
|
||
about half-past three; there we lay till eleven o'clock at night, and
|
||
had an oyster supper in bed. Hannah came up, and ate oysters with us
|
||
whilst we were in bed together. We ate them out of the shells, and drank
|
||
champagne, heard happy couples over head, and joked about it, talked
|
||
about fine limbs, about Sarah's fine legs. "Show us yours Hannah," said
|
||
Louisa. Hannah without a word cocked one leg up against the bed, and
|
||
drew up her petticoats to the top of one thigh. "There," said she, "I am
|
||
not ashamed of it." She had a fine leg, but was a very plain woman. She
|
||
had shown her leg to me on the day of the leg-show, when I had spent
|
||
involuntarily, as I have already told. We laughed and praised her leg.
|
||
"Oh! I'm ashamed of you both," said Hannah dropping her petticoats,
|
||
laughing, and hurrying out of the room. "I know where his fingers are."
|
||
She was right, Louisa was sitting up in bed, her legs half up, but
|
||
covered, I half reclining by the side of her, had thrust my hand under
|
||
the thighs, and was feeling her cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Hannah left the room. We began fucking, I was on the top operating when
|
||
the door opened, and a couple showed themselves. We heard a voice crying
|
||
out, "Not there Maam, it's occupied," and Hannah's sister rushing in
|
||
ejected a man and woman who had entered before they saw a couple were in
|
||
the bed. We were too far advanced to mind, I uncunted with the object
|
||
of closing the door, but the servants having done so, we consumated
|
||
and dozed off; nor was it till the servant came to say we ought to be
|
||
careful, that I got up and bolted the door.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then began a regular meeting once a week, and sometimes twice. Money
|
||
seemed no object to Louisa, she took what I gave, and never asked for
|
||
more; once or twice she said, "I want a bonnet dear,—give me one,"—or
|
||
a new pair of boots, or was hard up for a trifle, and then I gave her
|
||
all I could; but she had not in a couple of months as much as at the
|
||
last period of my acquaintance with her, Sarah had from me in three
|
||
days. But she let me spend money in oysters and champagne suppers, and
|
||
early dinners, Guardsman Jack who had come back from Windsor, used often
|
||
to get his fill. I once saw Jack in bed with Hannah, and his scarlet
|
||
uniform on the chair; he turned himself round with his face to the wall
|
||
when I entered. He had a thick head of black hair, which is all I saw.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Louisa was a voluptuous poke, and enjoyed the fun as much as a woman
|
||
could. I think, (but recollection on that point is not clear, when I
|
||
come to comparison), that she was the nicest woman to lay on I ever
|
||
had. I was slim, though far from a skeleton, and as I laid naked on her
|
||
between her large breasts, and between her thighs slightly elevated (for
|
||
she usually raised her legs, after we had fucked and she had recovered
|
||
from her pleasure, or when I mounted her for preliminary dalliance), I
|
||
could scarcely roll off of her without an effort. She had also when her
|
||
pleasure was increasing, a movement of her whole body, and not of her
|
||
cunt and backside alone; her breasts quivered with a gentle, perfectly
|
||
natural motion, and I could feel her flesh moving and rubbing against
|
||
mine from belly to neck in a way which stirred lust in me from the hair
|
||
of my head to the soles of my feet; I seemed to feel all over her body
|
||
at once, and it was most delicious. She had a lovely lasciviousness with
|
||
her tongue. If my tongue was in her mouth when she spent, she almost
|
||
sucked it out of me, and the clipping of her cunt after my prick had
|
||
been relieved from its stiffness I have already mentioned. Her length
|
||
of arm enabled her to squeeze my balls when in various positions, and
|
||
no woman ever let me pull her about and look at her cunt, whether it
|
||
was clean or spunky, more freely than she did. With many it is evidently
|
||
business, with her it seemed pleasure. She took a delight in all I did,
|
||
even when I washed her cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
(My pleasures however with her were of a simple kind. I had none of the
|
||
varied erotic pleasures that I now know, the bum-hole and mouth were
|
||
reserved for the enjoyment of my more matured years.) I should have
|
||
seen her more frequently, but she would only come at the outside twice
|
||
a week. No it was impossible,—she lived too far off. I tried to get
|
||
out of Hannah some knowledge about her, but could not. One day only when
|
||
fuddled she asked if I had heard she was married. "You mean," said I,
|
||
"living with a man." "No really married, and been so for years,—oh!
|
||
don't you tell her,—she'll cut the house if you do."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At the end of perhaps three months I was in bed with her; we had poked,
|
||
reposed, and were in amorous dalliance, lying face to face, she with one
|
||
limb over my haunch, so that I could feel her cunt well, she twiddling
|
||
my somewhat exhausted prick. "I have a surprise for you," she said. "For
|
||
me,—what?" "I'm in the family way." "The devil,—whose fault is that?"
|
||
"No one's fault, and perhaps no misfortune,—would you like a child?"
|
||
"I?—why?" (I had a presentiment of what was coming.) "Because it is
|
||
yours." "Nonsense." "It is my dear,—I have felt certain of it for some
|
||
time past, but waited to be quite sure before telling you." "Are you
|
||
quite sure?" "As certain as I am that I shall die."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was flabbergasted, felt distressed, as if I had done her some harm
|
||
that I could not repair, that I had injured her, and should cause
|
||
her pain and annoyance. It was succeeded by a fear that I should have
|
||
trouble through it, and expense that I could not afford. Then came the
|
||
idea that she was selling me, putting a plant on me; that if she were
|
||
with child it was another man's, not mine. Then came a belief over me
|
||
that what she said was true, that her pleasure in my embraces was so
|
||
real, so unlike that of the ordinary gay women, that the result might
|
||
be due to me. Overwhelmed I lay quiet, confused with the tumultuous
|
||
thoughts and feelings which rushed through my brain.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At length I said, "Are you sure?" "Yes." "It may be your husband's" (for
|
||
Hannah's hints came to my mind). "He!—he!—the miserable, contemptible
|
||
little wretch!—he?" She left off feeling my cock, raised herself on her
|
||
elbow, and looking at me said, "Who told you I was married?" "No one."
|
||
"Some one has." "No one,—but I have more than once fancied you were
|
||
married by the difficulty I have in getting you to come to meet me when
|
||
I want." "Some one has told you." "No one has." "I'm a damned fool,"
|
||
said she, "I dare say you know more than you say,—what do you know?"
|
||
"Nothing." "It's your child, and no one else's,—I'm sorry I have told
|
||
you,—say nothing more about it,"—and she turned on her back. "Are you
|
||
married?" "Of course not, or I should not be in bed with you." "Some man
|
||
is keeping you perhaps." "No one is keeping me either," said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I could not keep quiet, so much was I excited, and thought of the man
|
||
she met at J... s Street still, although she tried to hide that. I did
|
||
not like to suggest it, for I had found out that any reference to
|
||
him annoyed her, and I always avoided giving pain to any woman I had
|
||
connection with; but the matter seemed so grave that I could not keep
|
||
what was on my mind to myself, and as delicately as I could suggested
|
||
him.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"It's not," said she fiercely, "it can't be." "Why?" "You are the only
|
||
man who has spent in me for years." "What," said I incredulously, "no
|
||
one had you?" "No one has spent in me but you for years,—no one." I was
|
||
staggered, but returned to the subject. "Nonsense Louisa,—how can you
|
||
tell?" "I've told you why." "Why if you've a husband, and if you have a
|
||
friend who meets you, how can you be sure it's me?"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I have no husband, and it's no friend,—if you don't believe it, I tell
|
||
you on my oath, on my body and soul, and may I go to hell when I die, if
|
||
it be not true, that no man has spent in me for years but you." "No
|
||
man has fucked you!—what do they do then?" "That's no concern of
|
||
yours,—but no man's stuff has ever been up me for quite two years but
|
||
yours,—I'm not going to say any more about it,—my business is not
|
||
yours,—nobody has asked you to keep the child,—you need not trouble
|
||
yourself,—I'm sorry I told you." She turned her bum to me, and began to
|
||
cry; I tried to comfort her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"That will do," said she, "give me some oysters and champagne." I
|
||
ordered them, then wanted another fuck. "No you shan't have it,"—nor
|
||
would she let me. The oysters and champagne made her more complaisant,
|
||
but she was angry and snappish. After another fuck she got up and left
|
||
me before her usual time, and I went away wondering at this, and at the
|
||
number of women who had been, or who said they had been with child by
|
||
me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Soon after she was loving, sad, and serious, was sorry I would not have
|
||
liked the child, for it was certainly mine, but she would get rid of it.
|
||
Then in the familiarity of a lewd man and woman naked in bed together,
|
||
she told me a lot about herself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She <i>was</i> married, she lived with him and her mother, but loathed
|
||
her husband. "He,—he the miserable wretch,—he touch <i>me</i>, the
|
||
dirty beast!—I'd sooner die than let him," she cried, "if he wanted
|
||
even,—but he does not want <i>me</i>,—what he wants he gets elsewhere, not
|
||
with <i>me</i>," said she with strong emphasis. If she left him, she would
|
||
have to support her mother alone,—perhaps it would come to that some
|
||
day,—she was quite prepared for it. They ate and drank together when
|
||
he was at home, but had not slept together for years. He kept the house
|
||
comfortably enough,—perhaps he would so long as she took trouble about
|
||
it, for he did not care so long as he got his food good. Yes she did
|
||
meet a friend. It got her luxuries she could not get any other way; her
|
||
husband knew she got money elsewhere, for she dressed in a way he must
|
||
know his money would not enable her to do. He asked no questions, and
|
||
did not care nor heed, nor seem to notice. That was pretty well all I
|
||
ever got out of her. Hannah drunk, and talking to me one day said he was
|
||
a very little man, and a brewer's clerk, "a hop o' my thumb," she called
|
||
him. "Never mind what my friend does," said Louisa, "I've known him some
|
||
years,—he does something of course, he does not meet me for nothing,
|
||
but I tell you he has never spent in me,—no man has spent in me for
|
||
years but you." "Do you frig your friend?" "If you like, anything else
|
||
you like, it's all the same,—I'm not going to say; but neither he
|
||
nor any one else has spent in me,—no man's seed has been up me for
|
||
two years or more. The first night you had me I spent first, you spent
|
||
after; the next time as your seed touched me, I felt a shiver run right
|
||
through me, and I got in the family way at that very instant, I'm sure."
|
||
Louisa was particular in her language, she never said "spunk,"—thought
|
||
it a nasty word,—she always said "seed," or "stuff" when she spoke of
|
||
my sperm,—Sarah called it "muck".
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Though I had had such lots of women, and had heard of most things,
|
||
yet simple, straightforward fucking had engrossed me, I rarely had
|
||
out-of-the-way lusts and letches, and I never thought to ask if her
|
||
friend buggered or sucked her, or if she sucked him, or what little
|
||
amusements they were up to. At all events she must have satisfied him
|
||
some way, for he had known her she said some years. A man was likely to
|
||
stick to Louisa, for she was a magnificent piece of flesh, from her neck
|
||
to her ankles.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
So I believed Louisa, and felt interested in her belly beginning to
|
||
swell, but did not want the young one, or the troubles of paternity, or
|
||
to get her into trouble; besides I had no affection for her, though I
|
||
liked fucking her better and better.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Louisa then was away ill; I saw her again when her womb was cleared out,
|
||
and we took to fucking as usual. One day in baudy vagaries we had been
|
||
posturing, and she straddled across my face, bringing her cunt right on
|
||
to my mouth, and my nose to her bum, she had been asking me if I ever
|
||
kissed Sarah in any way but the straight one. She began kissing my pega
|
||
as she lay on the top of me, I kissed her buttocks, but took no hint, if
|
||
any were intended. She was very heavy, and I noticed for the first time
|
||
a strongish odour from her cunt which annoyed me; afterwards I used
|
||
often to fancy she had a strong smell about her quim, and was fool
|
||
enough to tell her so, which offended her? but we made it up.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After a little time she began asking me if I had not forgotten
|
||
Sarah,—did I love her as much?—did I long to have her again?—did she
|
||
(Louisa) not give me as much pleasure as Sarah? I had then got over my
|
||
desolation a little, and only thought of Sarah and her exquisite form
|
||
with a sigh, was annoyed that she had not written to me, and I began to
|
||
confess to myself, that for fucking, Sarah was not to be compared with
|
||
Louisa. Then I began to wonder at my having been so infatuated, and
|
||
let it out to Louisa one night. She said she wished I would keep
|
||
<i>her</i>,—three pounds a week, and she would make it do, and so on; and I
|
||
began to think seriously about the matter, for the expenses at the baudy
|
||
house were nearly that amount; and although my delicate senses had began
|
||
to revolt at the strong smell of Louisa, yet her voluptuousness was
|
||
enticing, and was making me actually constant to her. I had quite left
|
||
off my Mulatto, Brighton Bessie, and one or two others of my queens.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Louisa was again taken ill,—the consequence of her miscarriage, and of
|
||
the measures taken to bring that on I was told. She got worse and worse,
|
||
and was in great danger; she never wrote to me, but often to Hannah, and
|
||
her letters which I saw always referred to me affectionately; above all
|
||
she wanted to know what ladies I had at J...s Street. Hannah winking at
|
||
me used to say, "I'd like to know where you put it away now,—it's put
|
||
somewhere." I had taken no women to that house; but laughing said I was
|
||
chaste. Hannah did not believe that, so I said I frigged myself. "You
|
||
don't spill it about in that way," said she, "let me feel it,"—and she
|
||
put her hand outside my clothes on to my tool. "Oho!—oho!—oho!" said
|
||
she, for I stiffened. Then she brought me her accounts to cast up, and
|
||
when it was done, "I shall take a nap," said she, "you go now, for I
|
||
expect Mrs. ——— and a strange lady" (I had looked in casually that
|
||
morning),—and getting on to the bed she laid down showing her legs
|
||
liberally, and looking at me all the time. "Good bye," I said, and left;
|
||
but have thought since that Hannah wanted me to have her. She never
|
||
before or since looked at me in that way, nor behaved with such freedom
|
||
when we were alone.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Her bed was as I have I think already told, in the front-parlour in
|
||
J...s Street, and in an alcove, as many beds are in French hotels and
|
||
houses; and when the curtains were drawn across it, the bed was entirely
|
||
hidden.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
And then when without a woman at my command, and with a frequent need
|
||
for one, another piece of luck befell me. The way had been paved for it
|
||
before Louisa was so ill.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0016"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XVI.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
A friend's maid-servant.—Jenny.—Initial familiarity.—A
|
||
bum pinched.—Jenny communicative.—Her young man.—An
|
||
attempt, a failure, a faint, a look, and a sniff.—
|
||
Restoratives.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I knew an elderly couple who were childless, and lived in a nice little
|
||
house in the suburbs with, a long garden in front, and one at the back
|
||
as well; they were in comfortable but moderate circumstances, and kept
|
||
two servants only. Every year they went to the seaside, taking one
|
||
servant with them, and leaving the other at home to look after the
|
||
house; and usually some one to take charge of it with her. This year
|
||
they asked if I would when I passed the house (as I frequently did) call
|
||
in, and see if all was going properly, for the housemaid left in charge
|
||
was young, and her sister, a married woman, usually only stopped the
|
||
night with her, leaving early each morning for work in which she was
|
||
daily engaged. She was an upholstress.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I knew the servant whose name was Jane. She had been with the family
|
||
some months. I often dined at the house; and once or twice when she had
|
||
opened the garden-gate (always locked at nightfall), to let me out, I
|
||
had kissed her, and tipped her shillings. She was a shortish, fat-bummed
|
||
wench. Not long before this time I gave her bum such a hard pinch one
|
||
night, that she cried out. A day or two afterwards I said, "Was it
|
||
not black and blue?" "I don't know." "Let me see." "It's like your
|
||
impertance," she replied.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After that I used to ask her when I got the chance, to let me see if
|
||
the finger-marks were there, at which she would blush a little, and turn
|
||
away her head, but nothing further had come of the liberty.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When I called at the house I had no intention about the girl, as far as
|
||
I can recollect. She opened the door, and heard my errand and questions.
|
||
Yes all was right. Did her sister come and sleep there? Yes. Was she
|
||
there now? No, she would not be there till nearly dark. I stepped
|
||
inside, for then I thought of larking with her. "I am tired, and will
|
||
rest a little," and stepped into the parlour, sat down on a sofa, began
|
||
questioning her about a lot of trifles, and in doing so thought of the
|
||
pinch I had given her bum, and my cock began to tingle. Then I thought
|
||
she was alone in the house. "Oh! if she would let me fuck her!—has she
|
||
been broached?—she is nice and plump." Curiosity increased my lust, and
|
||
unpremeditatingly I began the approaches for the attack, though I only
|
||
meant a little amatory chaffing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Is it black and blue yet Jenny?" She did not for the instant seem to
|
||
recollect, for she asked me innocently enough, "What sir?" "Your bum
|
||
where I pinched it." She laughed, checked herself, coloured up, and
|
||
said, "Oh! don't begin that nonsense sir." I went on chaffing. "How
|
||
I should like to have pinched it under your clothes,—but no I would
|
||
sooner kiss it than pinch it." "Oh! if you're a going on like that I'll
|
||
go to the kitchen." I stood before the door, and stopped her going out.
|
||
"Now give me a kiss." I caught and kissed her, then gave a lot, and got
|
||
a return from her. "I won't—Lor there then,—what a one you are,"—and
|
||
so on. "Well Jenny one kiss, and you may afterwards kiss whenever you
|
||
want you know." And so she seemed to think, for I got her to sit down
|
||
on the sofa, and we gossiped and kissed at intervals, till my cock got
|
||
unruly. "What a fat bum you have," said I. Then she attempted to rise, I
|
||
pulled her back, we went on gossiping, and kissing at intervals. She got
|
||
quite interested in my talk as I sat with one arm round her waist, and
|
||
another on her thigh, outside her clothes of course.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
So for a while; but I was approaching another stage, was getting randy,
|
||
and reckless. "Lord how I'd like to be in bed with you, to feel that fat
|
||
bum of yours, to feel your c—u—n—t," spelling it, "to f—u—-c—k it
|
||
I'd give a five-pound note," said I all in a burst, and stooping, got
|
||
my hand up her clothes on to her thigh. She gave a howl. "Oh! I say
|
||
now,—what a shame!—oh! you beast." I shoved her back on the sofa
|
||
upsetting her, got my lips on her thighs, and kissed them. Then she
|
||
escaped me, and breathing hard, stood up looking at me after her
|
||
struggle. "Oh! I wouldn't have believed it," said she panting with the
|
||
exertion. What a lot of women I have heard say, they would not have
|
||
believed it, when I first made a snatch at their privates. I suppose
|
||
they say what they mean.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Begging her pardon, "I could not help it," I said, "you are so pretty
|
||
and nice,—I'd give ten pounds to be in bed with you an hour." "Well I'm
|
||
sure." "Think what it is not to have a woman you like." "Well I'm sure
|
||
sir, you are a married man,—you've got a partner, and ought to know
|
||
better,—Missus would not have asked you to call if she'd a know'd
|
||
you,—she thinks there's no gent like you,—what would she say if I tell
|
||
her?" "But you won't my dear." "She thinks you a perfect gentleman, and
|
||
most unlucky," the girl went on to say, "and she is sorry for you too."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! she does not know all, but you've heard, have you Jenny?" I tried
|
||
to make her sit on the sofa again, and promising that I would not forget
|
||
myself any more she did so. We kissed and made it up, and talking I soon
|
||
relapsed into baudiness.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The quarrelsome life I led with the oldish woman at home was I knew well
|
||
understood by the old couple. "I lead a miserable life," said I. "Oh!
|
||
yes I know all about it," said the girl "Master and Missus often talk
|
||
about you,—but you're very gay, ain't you?" Then I told this girl a
|
||
lot. "Think my dear what it is not even to sleep with a woman for two
|
||
months,—for two months we have never slept together,—I've never seen
|
||
her undressed,—never touched her flesh,—you know what people marry
|
||
for,—I want a woman,—you know what I mean don't you,—every night what
|
||
am I to do?—I love laying belly to belly naked with a nice woman, and
|
||
taking my pleasure with her,—so of course I can't keep from having
|
||
other women at times,—you don't know what an awful thing it is to have
|
||
a stiff prick, and not a nice woman to relieve it." She gave me a push,
|
||
got up, and made for the door at the word prick. Again I stopped her.
|
||
She had sat staring at me with her mouth wide open, without saying a
|
||
word, all the time I had been telling the baudy narrative of domestic
|
||
trouble, as if she were quite stupefied by my plain language until she
|
||
suddenly jumped up, and made for the door without saying a word.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was as quick as she, caught her, put my back against the door, and
|
||
would not let her go, but could not get her to look me in the face,
|
||
I had so upset her. There we stood, I begging her to sit down, and
|
||
promising not to talk so again, she saying, "Now let me go,—let me
|
||
out." "No,—sit down." "No." But in about a quarter of an hour she did,
|
||
and then again I told her of my trouble, avoided all straighforward
|
||
allusion to my wanting other women, but hinted it enough. She got
|
||
interested, and asked me no end of questions. "Lord why don't you
|
||
separate,—if I quarrel with my husband so, I'm sure I will,—I tell my
|
||
young man so." "Oh! you have a sweetheart." Yes she had,—a grocer's
|
||
shopman,—he lived at Brighton, came up third class to see her every
|
||
fortnight, starting early, and going back late. She was flattered by
|
||
my enquiries, told me all about him and herself, their intention to
|
||
get married in a year; and I sat and listened with one hand outside her
|
||
clothes on her thigh, and thinking how I could best manage to get into
|
||
her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"He goes with women," said I to make her jealous. "He don't I'm
|
||
sure,—if he did, and I found it out, I'd tear his eyes out, and break
|
||
off with him, though he says Brighton is a dreadful place for them
|
||
hussies." She got quite excited at the idea. "When he comes up, you and
|
||
he enjoy yourselves,—his hands have been where mine have to-night." "No
|
||
he hasn't,—if he dared I'd—now I don't like this talk,—you said you
|
||
wouldn't,—leave me alone,—you keep breaking your word." Another
|
||
little scuffle, a kiss, and a promise. "Why should you not enjoy
|
||
yourselves?—who would know anything about it but yourselves,—it's so
|
||
delicious to feel yourselves naked in each other's arms, your bellies
|
||
close together." "Get away now,"—and she tried to get up. I got my hand
|
||
up her clothes, pulled her on to the sofa, and holding her down with
|
||
one hand, pressed myself sideways on her, and kissed her, pulling out my
|
||
prick with the other.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she cried out so loudly that I was alarmed, for the window at the
|
||
back was open. "Hush,—be quiet,—there,—I've touched your cunt." I
|
||
pulled one of her hands on to my prick. "Oh! for shame Jenny you touched
|
||
my prick." Again she got up, and made for the door; so did I, and stood
|
||
there with my back to it, and my poker out in front of me. "Come and
|
||
open the door my dear, and you will run against this." She turned her
|
||
head away, and would not look. "Why don't you come on?—if you run up
|
||
against it, it won't hurt you,—it's soft though it's stiff." "I'll
|
||
write to my Mistress to-night," said she, and turned away. "Do my
|
||
pet,—tell her how stiff it was, and the old lady will want to see it
|
||
when she comes back." "It's disgraceful." "No my dear, it's to be proud
|
||
of,—why you're looking at it I can see."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she turned quite away. "That's right dear,—now I can see where I
|
||
pinched your bum,—it was not far from your little quim,—oh! if that
|
||
could talk, it would ask to be introduced to this,—it's hot, isn't it
|
||
Jenny?" I said, this and a lot more. She had walked to the back-window,
|
||
and stood looking into the garden whilst I rattled on. "You're laughing
|
||
Jenny." "It's a story," said she, "I'm insulted,"—and turned round with
|
||
a stern face. I shook my tooleywagger. "How ill-tempered you look,—come
|
||
and feel this, and you'll be sweet-tempered at once." She turned round
|
||
to the window again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I <i>will</i> write my Missus,—that I <i>will</i>." "Do dear."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"My sister will be here directly." "You said she comes at dusk,—it
|
||
won't be dark for three hours." "I wish you would go,—what will people
|
||
say if they know you're here?" "Don't be uneasy,—they will know no more
|
||
than they know of your doings with your young man." "There is nothing to
|
||
know about, but what is quite proper."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
So we stood. She looking out of the window, and turning round from time
|
||
to time. I standing by the door with my prick out; then I approached
|
||
her quietly. "Feel it Jenny,—take pity on it." "Oh! for God's sake
|
||
sir, what are you doing?" She turned and pushed me back, then retreated
|
||
herself, keeping her face to the window as she stepped backwards. "Oh!
|
||
there is Miss and Mrs. Brown walking in the next garden." Sure enough
|
||
there were two ladies there; they could have seen everything close to
|
||
the window over the low wall which separated the gardens; and had they
|
||
been looking, must have seen Jenny, me, and my prick. "Oh! if they have
|
||
seen, they will tell my Missus, and she'll tell my young man, and
|
||
I shall be ruined,—oh!—oh!—oh!" said she sinking back into an
|
||
arm-chair with a flood of tears,—half funk and shock, and perhaps
|
||
randiness, causing it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was alarmed. "Oh!" she sobbed, "if they saw you,—hoh!—ho!—and it
|
||
was no fault of mine,—you're a bad man,—oho! oho!" She sat with
|
||
her hands to her face, her elbows on her knees. I dropped on my knees
|
||
imploring her to be quiet, was sure no one had seen me, and tried to
|
||
kiss her. The position was inviting, I slid my hands up her clothes
|
||
between her thighs, she took no notice, was evidently in distress, not
|
||
even conscious of the invasion. A bold push, and my fingers touched
|
||
her cunt. I forgot all in the intensity of my enjoyment, at feeling my
|
||
fingers on the edge of the soft, warm nick. No repulse I I looked up,
|
||
she sank back in the chair, seemingly unconscious and deadly white.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I withdrew my hand, then came a mental struggle; my first impulse was to
|
||
get cold water, the next to look at her cunt. I went towards the door,
|
||
turned round to look at her. Her calves were visible, I ran back, and
|
||
lifted her clothes, so that I could just see her cunt-hair, gave her
|
||
thighs a kiss, and then rushed downstairs, got water, and as I entered
|
||
the room she was recovering. She knew nothing or next to nothing of what
|
||
had occured, nor that my fingers had touched her clitoris, though she
|
||
had not actually fainted.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I wish I had some brandy," she said, "I feel so weak." "Is there any
|
||
in the side-board?" "No." "I'll go and get a little." A few hundred feet
|
||
from the house down a side-door, was a public-house. As I was going,
|
||
"You will let me in again?" I said. "If you promise not to touch me."
|
||
She looked so pale that I fetched brandy, but put the street-door key
|
||
in my pocket as I went. "If she don't let me in," I thought, "she shan't
|
||
have the key,—and what will she tell her sister about that?" It was
|
||
a key almost as big as a shovel; she never noticed that I had taken it
|
||
away. She thought by her dodge that she had got rid of me, and told me
|
||
so afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I brought back the brandy and knocked. "Let me in." "I won't." "Then you
|
||
shan't have the street-door key." This was spoken to each other through
|
||
the closed door. A pause, then the door opened. "You are coming Jenny."
|
||
We went downstairs into the kitchen, she had brandy and water, and so
|
||
had I. It was a hot day, the pump-water was deliriously cool, I made
|
||
hers as strong as she would take it,—it was an instinct of mine. She
|
||
got her colour back, and became talkative, we talked about her fainting,
|
||
but she tried to avoid talking about it, and did not want me to refer to
|
||
what had led to it. I did, and was delighted to think that it was owing
|
||
to what is called "exposing my person."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I don't think the ladies saw it, so you need not have been so
|
||
frightened Jenny,—but you saw it, did you not?" No reply. "I saw you
|
||
looking at it." "It's a story." "Why did you faint?" "I always feel
|
||
faint if I am startled." "What startled you?" "Nothing." "You saw it,
|
||
and you put your hand over it to hide it, and you touched it." "It's a
|
||
story,—I wish you'd go." "You ungrateful little devil, when I've just
|
||
fetched you brandy." "It's through you that I felt ill." "Why?" No
|
||
reply. "Don't be foolish,—it was for fear that the ladies should have
|
||
seen my prick so near you,—now look at it,"—and I pulled it out, it
|
||
was not stiff. "It was twice the size when you saw it,—feel it, and it
|
||
will soon be bigger."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The girl rose saying she would go and remain in the forecourt till her
|
||
sister came, if I did not leave, but I prevented her going out of the
|
||
kitchen. She began to cry again, and had a little more brandy and water.
|
||
My talk took its old channel.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Do you know how long you were fainting?" "I didn't faint, but only a
|
||
minute or so." "Do you know what I did?" She was sitting down, then got
|
||
upright, looked at me full in the face, her eyes almost starting out of
|
||
her head. "What did you do!—what?—what?—what?" She spoke hurriedly,
|
||
anxiously, in an agitated manner. "I threw up your clothes, kissed your
|
||
cunt, and felt it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"It's a lie,—it's a lie." "It's true,—and the hair is short, and
|
||
darker than the hair of your head,—and your thighs are so white,—and
|
||
your garters are made of blue cloth,—and I felt it, the dear little
|
||
split,—how I wish my belly had been up against it I—what a lovely
|
||
smell it has!" (putting my fingers to my nose).
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oho!—oho!—oho!" said she bursting into tears, "what a shame to take
|
||
liberties with a poor girl when she can't help herself,—oho!—oho!—you
|
||
must be a bad man,—Missus had no business to send you to look after
|
||
me, as if she could not trust me,—she don't know what sort of man you
|
||
are,—and a gentleman too,—oho!—and married too,—it's a shame,—oho!
|
||
—oho! I don't believe you though,—oho—o—o." And when I told her
|
||
again the colour and the make of her garters, she nearly howled. "You
|
||
mean man to do such a thing when I was ill."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I kissed her, she let me, but went on blubbering. "I've a good mind to
|
||
tell my young man." "That will be foolish, because you and I mean to
|
||
have more pleasure than we have had,—and he'll never be any the wiser
|
||
but if you tell him, he'll think it's your fault."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This had occupied some hours, it was getting dark, but it seemed only as
|
||
if I had been there some minutes, so deliriously exciting are lascivious
|
||
acts and words. The charm of talking baudily to a woman for the first
|
||
time, is such, that hours fly away just like minutes.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I got her on to my lap and kissed her. She was so feeble that I put my
|
||
hands up her clothes nearly to her knees before she repulsed them. Then
|
||
I feared her sister coming home; she promised to hide the brandy, and we
|
||
parted. She kissed me, and let me feel to her knees to induce me to go.
|
||
"Oh! for God's sake sir, do go before my sister comes." My last words
|
||
were. "Mind you've felt my cock, and I've felt your cunt." "Pray
|
||
go"—and I departed, leaving her tearful, excited, and in a state of
|
||
exhaustion which seemed to me unaccountable.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Probably had I persisted a little longer I should have had her, such
|
||
was the lassitude into which she had fallen; but I felt that I had made
|
||
progress, and went home rejoicing, and forming plans for the future.
|
||
When I had had some food, and thought over the matter, I came to the
|
||
conclusion that I had been a fool in leaving her, and that had I pushed
|
||
matters more determinate at the last moment, I should have certainly
|
||
fucked her before I had left. I was mad with myself when I reflected on
|
||
that, and the opportunity lost, which might not occur again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny had not fainted quite, but though unable to speak, resist, or
|
||
indeed move, she must have been partially conscious. I think this from
|
||
what I know of her nature afterwards.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0017"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XVII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
When are women most lewd.—Garters, money, and promises.—
|
||
About my servant.—The neckerchief.—Armpits felt.—Warm
|
||
hints.—Lewd suggestions.—Baudy language.—Tickling.—
|
||
"Fanny Hill".—Garters tried.—Red fingers.—Struggle, and
|
||
escape.—Locked out.—I leave.—Baudy predictions, and
|
||
verifications.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I have a confused recollection of thinking myself the next day an ass,
|
||
for having missed a good opportunity of spermatizing a fresh cunt; yet
|
||
for some reason or another it must have been three days before I went to
|
||
try my luck again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had about this time of my life began to frame intentions, and
|
||
calculate my actions towards women; although still mostly ruled by
|
||
impulse and opportunity in love matters. My philosophy was owing to
|
||
experience, and also in a degree to my friend the Major, to whom some
|
||
years before I had confided my having commissioned a French woman to get
|
||
me a virgin. He was older, poorer, and more dissolute than ever, "He is
|
||
the baudiest old rascal that ever I heard tell a story," was the remark
|
||
of a man at our Club one night. Ask him to dinner in a quiet way by
|
||
himself, give him unlimited wine, and he would in an hour or two begin
|
||
his confidential advice in the amatory line, and in a wonderful manner
|
||
tell of his own adventures, and give reasons why he did this or that,
|
||
why he succeeded with this woman, or missed that girl, in a way as
|
||
amusing, and instructive to a young listener, as could be imagined.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"If you want to get over a girl," he would say, "never flurry her till
|
||
her belly's full of meat and wine; let the grub work. As long as she is
|
||
worth fucking, it's sure to make a woman randy at some time. If she is
|
||
not twenty-five she'll be randy directly her belly is filled,—then go
|
||
at her. If she's thirty, give her half-an-hour. If she's thirty-five let
|
||
her digest an hour, she won't feel the warmth of the dinner in her cunt
|
||
till then. Then she'll want to piss, and directly after that she'll
|
||
be ready for you without her knowing it. But don't flurry your young
|
||
un,—talk a little quiet smut whilst feeding, just to make her laugh
|
||
and think of baudy things; then when she has left table, get at her. But
|
||
it's well," the old Major would say, "to leave a woman alone in a room
|
||
for a few minutes after she has dined, perhaps then she will let slip a
|
||
fart or two, perhaps she'll piss,—she'll be all the better for the wind
|
||
and water being out. A woman's cunt doesn't get piss-proud like a man's
|
||
prick you know, they're differently made from us my boy,—but show any
|
||
one of them your prick as soon as you can, it's a great persuader. Once
|
||
they have seen it they can't forget it, it will keep in their minds.
|
||
And a baudy book, they won't ever look at till you've fucked them!—oh!
|
||
won't they!—they would at church if you left them alone with it." And
|
||
so the Major instructed us.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
About three days afterwards, taking a pair of garters, two small showy
|
||
neckerchiefs, and <i>Fanny Hill</i> with me, I knocked at the door. "Oh!
|
||
you!" said she colouring up. "Yes,—is everything right?" "Yes! all
|
||
right, what should be the matter sir?" She stood at the street-door
|
||
holding it open, though I had entered the hall. I turned, closed the
|
||
door, and caught hold of her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Now none of that pray sir, you insulted me enough last time." "I could
|
||
not help it, you're so lovely, it's your fault,—forgive me, and I won't
|
||
do so any more,—here is a sovereign, take it, kiss me, and make it
|
||
up." "I don't want your money," said she sulkily. "Take it, I give it
|
||
with real pleasure,—what I had the other day was worth double."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I won't be paid for your rudeness, if that's what you mean." "Lord my
|
||
dear I've no occasion to pay for that, I took it without pay,—I wish I
|
||
could get what I told you yesterday,—I'd give ten times the sum." "You
|
||
are going on again." "Don't be foolish,—take it, buy a pair of silk
|
||
stockings." "Your plump legs would look so nice in them,"—and I forced
|
||
her to put the money into her pocket.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I got her to the parlour, to sit down, to allow me to kiss her,
|
||
and then to talk about me and my "Missus," as she called her, a subject
|
||
which seemed to excite her, for she began asking me question after
|
||
question, and listened to all I said with breathless attention about my
|
||
daily habits, rows, and fast doings. Once I stopped at some question.
|
||
"I won't tell you that." "Oh! do,—do." "No it's curious." "Do,—do." It
|
||
was about a pretty servant-girl whom I had noticed in my house. "It will
|
||
offend you if I do." "No it won't." "Well give me a kiss then."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She kissed me. She had stood up a moment, now she sat down again by me
|
||
on the sofa. I went on with my story, every now and then I stopped till
|
||
she kissed me, it came to a kiss every minute, as I sat with my arm
|
||
round her waist, talking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Said I, "It was a servant whom my wife turned out at a day's notice,—a
|
||
pretty girl,—I had taken to kissing her, and then I nudged her
|
||
somewhere you know. One night when she opened the door, I saw by the
|
||
light that my wife was in our bed-room. 'Is your Mistress upstairs?'
|
||
'Yes sir.' 'And the cook?' 'Yes.' Then I closed with her. 'Don't sir,
|
||
Missus will hear.' I hugged her closer, shoved her up against the wall,
|
||
got my hand on to her cunt, felt her, and gave her half-a-sovereign. How
|
||
delicious it was to get the fingers on to the wet nick of that pretty
|
||
girl, and say, 'How I should like to fuck that Mary.'" I told it in
|
||
words like that to Jenny, and she sat listening. At the word "fuck" up
|
||
she got.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You are a going on rude again." "You asked me." "Not for that." "But
|
||
that's what I had to tell, what you kissed me to tell." "I didn't think
|
||
you would say rude things." "Sit down, and I'll tell you without rude
|
||
words." And so I did, telling all over again with additions, but instead
|
||
of saying "cunt," "fuck," and so on, said, "I got my hand you know
|
||
where,"—"and then she let me you know what,"—"she was frightened to
|
||
let me do, you guess what I wanted."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Luckily though she foolishly told her fellow-servant, she did not say
|
||
who had been feeling her. That sneak told my wife, who told me about it,
|
||
or all she knew, and said she could not keep such an improper girl in
|
||
the house as that. 'But the other servant may have told a lie to spite
|
||
her.' 'Perhaps, but I'll turn her out too',—and so she did, both left."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Thus I talked to Jenny till I expect her quim was hot enough; then said
|
||
I, "Here is a pretty neckerchief,—put it on." "Oh! how pretty." "I
|
||
won't give it you unless you put it on." She went to the glass and
|
||
unbuttoned the top of her dress, which was made to button on the front.
|
||
I saw her white fat bosom, she threw the kerchief round the neck, and
|
||
tried to push it down the back. "Let me put it down,—it's difficult."
|
||
She let me. "You are not unbuttoned enough,—it's too tight." She undid
|
||
another button, I pushed down the kerchief, and releasing my hand as I
|
||
stood at the back of her, put it over her shoulder, and down in front,
|
||
pushing it well under her left breast. "Oh! what a lovely breast you
|
||
have,—let me kiss it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A shriek, a scuffle; In the scuffle I burst off a button or two, which
|
||
exposed her breast, and getting my hand on to one of the globes began
|
||
feeling and kissing it. Then I slid my hand further down, and under her
|
||
armpit. "Oh! what a shame,—don't,—I don't like it." "How lovely,—kiss,
|
||
kiss,—oh! Jenny what a lot of hair I can feel under here."
|
||
"Oh!—screach,—screach,—oh! don't tickle me,—oh!—oh!,"—and she
|
||
crouched as women do who can't bear tickling. I saw my advantage. "Are
|
||
you ticklish?" "Yes,—oh!—(screach,—screach),—oh! leave off."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Instead of leaving off I tickled harder than ever. She got my hand out,
|
||
but I closed on her, tickling her under her arm, pinching her sides, and
|
||
got her into such a state of excitement, that directly I touched her she
|
||
screached with wild laughter; the very idea of being touched made her
|
||
shiver. We were on the sofa, she yelling struggling whilst I pinched
|
||
her, she trying to get away from me, but fruitlessly; I buried my face
|
||
in her breasts which were now largely exposed, and she fell back I with
|
||
my face on her, and holding her tight. Then I put one hand down, feeling
|
||
outside for her notch; that stopped her screaching, and she pushed me
|
||
off as she got up.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I soothed her, begged pardon, spoke of the hair in her armpits, wondered
|
||
if it was the same colour that it was lower down. Now she shammed anger,
|
||
boxed my ears, and we make it up. I produced the garters. "Oh! what a
|
||
lovely pair." "They're yours if you let me put them on." "I won't." "Let
|
||
me put on halfway up." "No." "Just above the ankle." "No, my stockings
|
||
are dirty." "Never mind." "No." Then she made an excuse, said she must
|
||
see to something, and left the room. I thought she was going to piddle.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She came back. I found afterwards she had been out to lace up her boots,
|
||
they were untidy. It was coquettishness, female instinct, for she wanted
|
||
the garters, and meant to let me try them on, though refusing. "Where
|
||
do you garter, about knee?" "I shan't tell you." "I've seen,—let me put
|
||
them on below the knees." "No." "Then I'll give them to another woman
|
||
who will let me." "I don't care." I threw the garters on to the table
|
||
after some fruitless attempts. I was getting awfully lewd with our
|
||
conversation.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Do you like reading?" "Yes." "Pictures?" "Yes." "I've a curious book
|
||
here." "What is it?" I took the book out. "The Adventures of Fanny Hill"
|
||
"Who was she?" "A gay lady,—it tells how she was seduced, how she had
|
||
lots of lovers, was caught in bed with men,—would you like to read it?"
|
||
"I should." "We will read it together,—but look at the pictures,"—this
|
||
the fourth or fifth time in my life I have tried this manoeuvre with
|
||
women.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I opened the book at a picture of a plump, leering, lecherous-looking
|
||
woman squatting, and pissing on the floor, and holding a dark-red,
|
||
black-haired, thick-lipped cunt open with her fingers. All sorts of
|
||
little baudy sketches were round the margin of the picture. The early
|
||
editions of <i>Fanny Hill</i> had that frontispiece.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was flabbergasted, silent. Then she burst out laughing, stopped and
|
||
said, "What a nasty book,—such books ought to be burnt." "I like them,
|
||
they're so funny." I turned over a page. "Look, here is she with a boy
|
||
who sold her watercresses, is not his prick a big one?" She looked
|
||
on silently, I heard her breathing hard. I turned over picture after
|
||
picture. Suddenly she knocked the book out of my hand to the other side
|
||
of the room. "I won't see such things," said she. "Won't you look at it
|
||
by yourself?" "If you leave it here I'll burn it." "No you won't, you'll
|
||
take it to bed with you." There I left the book lying, it was open and
|
||
the frontispiece showing. "Look at her legs," said I, for we could see
|
||
the picture as we sat on the sofa; and I began to kiss and tickle her
|
||
again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She shrieked, laughed, got away, and rushed to the door. I brought her
|
||
back, desisted from tickling and lewd talking, though I was getting
|
||
randier than ever. "Now have the garters,—let me put one round the
|
||
leg, just to see how it looks,—just half-way up the calf." After much
|
||
persuasion, after pulling up my trowsers, and showing how a garter
|
||
looked round my calf, she partly consented. "Promise me you won't tickle
|
||
me." I promised everything.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I dropped on one knee, she sat on the sofa. "Put one foot on my leg."
|
||
She put one foot there, and carefully raised her clothes an inch or
|
||
two above the boot-top. "A little higher." She raised it holding her
|
||
petticoats tight round the leg, and I slipped the garter round it. "It's
|
||
too loose, raise a little more." "I won't any higher,—I can see how it
|
||
looks." "Won't they look nice when they are above the knee? and won't
|
||
your young man be pleased when he sees them there." "My young man won't
|
||
see them any more than you will." "Let me slip on the other." The same
|
||
process, the same care on her part. She bestowed all her care on the
|
||
limb I was gartering, lest I should slip the garter higher up. The
|
||
remainder of her clothes were loose round her other leg. Then I pushed
|
||
my hand up her clothes and herself back on the sofa, relinquishing the
|
||
leg I was gartering.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Rapidly my hand felt thighs, hair, cunt, How wet! What is this which
|
||
catches my fingers?—what is it they are gliding between? With a yell
|
||
she pushed me away, and got up as I withdrew my fingers. She had a
|
||
napkin on, my fingers were stained red. "Oh, you beast," said she
|
||
bursting into tears. I caught hold of her, and began to tickle her; she
|
||
pushed me violently away, and escaping, rushed downstairs, slammed the
|
||
kitchen-door in my face, and locked herself in. I have been accustomed
|
||
to this behaviour on similar occasions.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I stood outside begging pardon, talking baudiness, I tried to burst open
|
||
the door, and could not. I was not fond of poorliness in women, had a
|
||
keen nose, and oftentimes could smell a woman if poorly, even with her
|
||
clothes down; how it was I did not smell <i>her</i>, considering how near
|
||
my nose had been to her split and her breasts, I can't say, but suppose
|
||
randiness overcame my other senses. I played with my prick which was in
|
||
an inflammatory state, feeling it made me much randier, I called through
|
||
the door how I wanted to fuck her, how my prick was bursting, how
|
||
I would frig myself if she did not let me. "What a hard-hearted
|
||
girl,—I'll give you ten pounds to let me,—who will know it, but you
|
||
and me?" and a lot more; but it was of no use, and at length I went
|
||
upstairs, determining to wait, and thinking that in time she might
|
||
follow me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On the sofa I sat thinking of what I had done. There lay one garter,
|
||
I took it up, and rolled it round my pego. I rubbed the tip with it,
|
||
thinking it might be a spell. I took up <i>Fanny Hill</i>, got more excitedly
|
||
reading the book, looking at its salacious pictures, and feeling my
|
||
prick at the same time. Then the sense ol pleasure got beyond control,
|
||
and laying down the book on the floor just beneath me, where I could
|
||
see a baudy picture, I turned on my side on the sofa, and frigged till a
|
||
shower of spunk shot out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then down I went. The door was still locked, my senses were calmed, but
|
||
I talked baudy, and offered her money without a reply; growing tired,
|
||
I bawled out, "I'm going,—you will let me in a day or two, and get the
|
||
ten pounds towards the new shop,—you won't be so unkind when I come
|
||
again." "I'll take good care never to let you in," said she. They were
|
||
the only words I could get out of her. I went upstairs, took a slip of
|
||
paper, and wrote on it, "I have wrapped the garter round my prick, it
|
||
is a charm. Directly you put it on I shall know, for my prick will
|
||
stiffen,—you will put it on I am sure; and directly my prick stiffens,
|
||
your cunt will long to have it up it, even if I am miles away. You will
|
||
put the garter on, for you can't help doing so,—I'm sure to fuck
|
||
you, neither you nor I could avoid it if we would. Why should we deny
|
||
ourselves the pleasure,—no one will know it, and you will be ten pounds
|
||
the richer." I wrote that or something nearly like it, and charmed with
|
||
my own wit, rubbed the garter over the top of my prick till I left the
|
||
smell on it, then laid it on the table over the paper I had written, and
|
||
went away, taking <i>Fanny Hill</i> with me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It is a positive fact, that about two hours afterwards I had a violent
|
||
randy throbbing in my prick, and found out later on that just at that
|
||
very time she had put that garter on.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
(And now for the complete understanding of what follows, it must be
|
||
stated that the house was in plan nearly like that which I inhabited
|
||
when I had my beautiful servant Mary. Kitchens in the basement, two
|
||
parlours with folding doors between them, nearly always open; and rooms
|
||
back and front over the parlours; and that my absent friend did with
|
||
those rooms whilst absent at the seaside, what was not unusual with
|
||
people of their class in those days, lock most of them up, leaving only
|
||
sufficient for the servant, or caretaker, to inhabit.)
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0018"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XVIII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
"Fanny Hill" sent to Jenny.—My next visit.—Thunder,
|
||
lightning, sherry, and lust.—A chase round a table.—The
|
||
money taken.—Tickling and micturating.—A search for "Fanny
|
||
Hill".—A chase upstairs.—In the bed-room.—Thunder, funk,
|
||
and lewdness.—Intimidation and coaxing.—Over and under.—A
|
||
rapid spender.—Virginity doubtful.—Fears, tears, and
|
||
fucking.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I waited a few days to ensure her poorliness being over. I had not left
|
||
her <i>Fanny Hill</i>, but why I cannot tell, for I knew how baudy books
|
||
excited a woman. The night before my next attack, I wrapped up the book,
|
||
directed it to her, gave a boy sixpence to deliver it, hid myself by a
|
||
lilac which was in the front-garden close to the road, and saw the boy
|
||
give it to her, and go off quickly as I had told him. It was just dark,
|
||
and too dark inside the passage of the house to see; for Jenny stepped
|
||
outside the house so as to get light, and stripped off the envelope.
|
||
I saw also that she opened the book, closed it, looked rapidly on both
|
||
sides, then stepped inside, and closed the door. I expect that her cunt
|
||
got hot enough that night. I saw her sister who slept with her nightly,
|
||
going through the front-garden soon afterwards, and Jenny open the door
|
||
for her. I had then moved off to a safe distance, the other side of the
|
||
road.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny was fond of finery, and I had heard the old lady of the house
|
||
declaiming about it. Her pleasure at the showy neckerchief and garters
|
||
was great, so I bought a pretty broach, and filling my purse with
|
||
sovereigns determined to have her at any cost, for my letch for her had
|
||
got violent. The next day I had a good luncheon, went to the house just
|
||
after her dinnertime, and took with me a bottle of sherry. I recollect
|
||
the morning well. It was a sultry day, reeking with moisture; it had
|
||
been thundering, the clouds were dark and threatening, the air charged
|
||
with electricity. Such a day makes all creation randy, and you may
|
||
see every monkey at the Zoological Gardens frigging or fucking. I was
|
||
resolute with lustful heat, the girl was I expected under the same
|
||
influence, and taking her as I did after a lazy meal, everything was
|
||
propitious to me. "How shall I get in?—if I knock she may not open; and
|
||
if she sees me go up the front-garden she won't open." But I had to try,
|
||
so walked up to the door, and gave one single loud tradesman's knock.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
There was a little porch and a shelter over the street-door. Standing
|
||
flat up against the door, so that I might be hidden from her sight if
|
||
peeping, I heard an upper window open. She looked out, but where I was
|
||
she could not see me. There was delay, so again I knocked, and soon the
|
||
door began to open, I pushed it and stepped in. The front-shutters on
|
||
the ground-floor to my wonder were closed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Hoh! sir—you," said Jenny amazed, "what do you want?" I pushed the
|
||
door to, and caught hold of her. "I've come to have a chat and a kiss."
|
||
She struggled, but I got her tight, and kissed as a randy man then
|
||
kisses a woman, it is a magnetizing thing. "Oh! there it is again,"
|
||
she cried as a loud thunder-clap was heard; "oh! let me go,—oh! it do
|
||
frighten me so."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Where are you going?" "Oh I into the parlour,—I've closed the
|
||
shutters." The girl was in a panic, and did not know what she said. The
|
||
parlour-door was open, the room nearly dark, which suited me. She went
|
||
just in, and then turned round to go out, but I pulled her to the sofa.
|
||
A flash of lightning showed even in the darkened room, the girl cowered
|
||
and hid her face with her hands. I took her round the waist. "Shut your
|
||
eyes, and lean your head against me." Mechanically she did, she was
|
||
utterly unnerved. I felt down with my right hand the form of her thighs
|
||
and haunches through her clothes. My prick began to stand, pulling
|
||
it out, and taking her near hand I put it round my prick just as the
|
||
thunder roared. She kept her hand unconsciously on it for a time, then
|
||
with a start took it away and jumped up. "Oh! it's wicked," said she,
|
||
"when God Almighty is so angry,"—and just as she got to the door a
|
||
terrific flash made her turn round again. I caught her, and sitting
|
||
down on a chair pulled her on to my knee; she hid at once her face on my
|
||
shoulder in terror.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Coaxing and soothing, and exciting her, in her fear she listened at
|
||
times twitching and oh-ing. I was sorry I had touched her cunt the other
|
||
day I said. "Oh! now don't." "Feel my prick again,—do dear." "Let me
|
||
go,—you've no business here." Another flash came, I put my hand up her
|
||
clothes, the tip of my fingers just touched her quim. She struggled and
|
||
got away, and in doing so upset the chair which fell down and broke.
|
||
"Oh! now what will my Missus say!" said she. Then a screech, and she got
|
||
to the other side of the table.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This went on a little longer, a gleam of sunshine came through the
|
||
shutters. Then she opened one shutter, and said if I did not go she
|
||
would open the window and call out. The light showed my pego, stiff,
|
||
red-tipped and ready. "Look what your feeling has done for this Jenny,"
|
||
said I shaking my tooleywag at her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But her resoluteness daunted me, so I promised not to do so again. "Here
|
||
is some sherry that I was taking home to taste,—let's have a glass,—it
|
||
will do both of us good after this thunder,—you look white, and as if
|
||
you wanted a glass." I had got out of her on a previous day that
|
||
she liked sherry. "I'll go and get you a glass," said she. "No you
|
||
shan't,—you will lock the door," said I,—I know that was in her mind.
|
||
No she would not. "We will go together then."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We did, and returning to the parlour under my most solemn promise
|
||
of good behaviour, down she sat, and we began drinking sherry. One
|
||
glass,—two, then another she swallowed. "No I dare not, it will get
|
||
into my head,—no more." "Nonsense,—after your fright it will do you
|
||
good." "Well half a glass." "Isn't it nice Jenny?" "It is." "Does not
|
||
your sweetheart give it you?" "At Christmas, but only one glass." The
|
||
sherry began to work. "Only another half-glass,"—and I poured it out
|
||
nearly full. Soon after I got up after filling my own, and standing
|
||
before her again filled up hers which she had sipped without her seeing
|
||
me. "Finish your glass dear." "No I can't,—it's making me so hot."
|
||
"Just another half-glass." "I won't." But she began to chatter and told
|
||
me again all about her young man, of their intending to open a grocer's
|
||
shop when they had two hundred pounds; that he had saved a certain sum,
|
||
and when he had a little more his father was to put fifty pounds to it.
|
||
She also had put money in the savings bank. I got closer to her, and
|
||
asked for a kiss. "Well I'll kiss you if you promise not to be rude
|
||
again." A kiss and a promise. She was one of the simplest and most open
|
||
girls I have ever met with, and once a half-feeling of remorse came over
|
||
me about my intentions, whilst she was talking on quite innocently about
|
||
her future; but my randy prick soon stopped that.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What nonsense dear, your young man won't know that I have felt your
|
||
thighs, and you my thing, nor any one else what we do,—I have
|
||
thought of nothing else since I touched you,—kiss;—now let me do it
|
||
again,—just feel it,—only where my hand's been before,—I swear I
|
||
won't put my hand up higher, just above your garters,—have you got
|
||
those garters on?" "No." "Oh! you have." "Well I have." "Let me just
|
||
see." "I shan't." "I'll give you a sovereign to let me." "Shan't."
|
||
I pulled out the sovereign, put it on the table and spite of her
|
||
resistance pulled up her clothes just high enough to see one garter;
|
||
then clutching her round the waist I pushed my hands up, and touched a
|
||
well-developed clitoris. She struggled, but I kept my hand there, kissed
|
||
her rapturously, and frigged her; her cap fell off in her struggle. "Oh
|
||
I—can't—bear—it—now—sir;—I don't—oh!—like it,—oh!" Then with a
|
||
violent effort she got my hand away, but I held her fast to me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What a lovely smell your cunt has," said I putting the fingers just
|
||
withdrawn from her thighs up to my nose. I had always noticed that
|
||
nothing helps to make a woman more randy than that action; it seems
|
||
to overwhelm them with modest confusion; I have always done that
|
||
instinctively to a woman whom I was trying.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! what a man,—oh! let me pick up my cap." Just then I noticed her
|
||
hair was short, and remarked it. She was annoyed, her vanity hurt,
|
||
turned her thoughts entirely. "Yes," she said, "I had a fever two years
|
||
ago,—-but it's growing again." "Well it has grown enough on your cunt
|
||
dear,—did it fall off there?" "Oh! what a man!—oh! now what a shame!"
|
||
My hand was on her thighs again, and I managed another minute's frig,
|
||
and kept her close to me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The heat had become excessive. What with struggling, and the excitement,
|
||
sweat was on both our faces. Her thighs by her crack were as wet as if
|
||
she had pissed them, her backside began to wriggle with pleasure, which
|
||
I knew I was giving her; but again with a violent effort she freed
|
||
herself from me, and as I put my hand to my nose she violently pulled it
|
||
away. The sherry was upsetting her wisdom.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"There is the sovereign," said I as she stood looking at me, "that will
|
||
help you." "Don't want it." Seeing where her pocket-hole was I pushed
|
||
it into it. "Oh! what a lucky sovereign, to lay so close to your cunt
|
||
Jenny,"—and pushing my hand into her pocket I touched the bottom of her
|
||
belly through the linen. Again a struggle, a repulse, then she put her
|
||
hand into her pocket. "You're feeling your cunt Jenny," said I. "O—oh!"
|
||
said she taking it out quickly, "I was feeling for the money,—I won't
|
||
have it."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I kissed her till the sweat ran off my face on to hers. "Oh! my
|
||
goodness," said she as it grew darker, "it's going to thunder again."
|
||
"Have another glass." "No it's gone into my head already." But she took
|
||
a gulp of mine. "Let's fuck you Jenny dear." "What?" "Fuck." "Shan't."
|
||
"Oh! you know what I mean." "No I don't, but it's something bad if it's
|
||
from you." I pulled out my prick, and tried to push her on the sofa.
|
||
She got away, and then with my prick out I chased her round the table.
|
||
"Leave off," said she, "a joke's a joke, but this is going too far."
|
||
She was getting lewd, and was staring at my prick which showed above the
|
||
table as I chased her. Quick as me she managed to keep just on the side
|
||
of it opposite to me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'll swear I won't touch you again if you will sit down." "I won't
|
||
trust you,—you've been swearing all the afternoon." "So help me God I
|
||
will," said I, and meant it. "Well then not when you are like that." I
|
||
pushed my prick inside my trowsers, and then she sat down. What a
|
||
long time this takes to tell, what repetition! but there are not many
|
||
incidents I recollect more clearly.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then I took out ten sovereigns, all bright, new ones, laid them on the
|
||
table, and then the broach. "Do you like that Jenny?" "Yes." "It is for
|
||
you if you will let me, and those ten sovereigns also." "You are a bad
|
||
man," said the girl, "and would make me forget myself and be ruined,
|
||
and without caring a bit,"—and she began rocking her head about, and
|
||
rolling her body as she sat beside me, and looking at the money. "Who
|
||
will know?—you won't tell your young man,—I shan't tell my wife,—let
|
||
me." "I shan't,—never,—never,—never,—never, if it was fifty pounds,"
|
||
said she almost furiously. "He won't find it out." "Yes he would."
|
||
"Nonsense,—half the servants do it, yet marry,"—and then I told her of
|
||
some I had who had married. "No,—no,—no," she kept repeating, almost
|
||
bawling it out, as I told of Mary So-and-so who married a butler, and
|
||
Sarah So-and-so who married my greengrocer, though I'd fucked them over
|
||
and over again. "No,—no," looking at the money; then suddenly she took
|
||
up the broach, and laid it down again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Before running round the table after her, I had thrown off my coat and
|
||
waistcoat. "It's so hot, I've a good mind to take off my trowsers," I
|
||
had said; but I had another motive. She seemed weaker, and was so,
|
||
for gradually she had got inflamed and lewd by heat, the electrical
|
||
condition of the atmosphere, the titillation of my finger on her seat of
|
||
pleasure, and the sight of my stiff penis. She had I expect, got to
|
||
that weak, yielding, voluptuous condition of mind and body, when a woman
|
||
knows she is wrong, yet cannot make up her mind to resist. Just then it
|
||
came into my mind to tickle her; and then followed a scene which is one
|
||
of the most amusing in my reminiscences.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She shrieked, and wriggled down on to the floor. I tried to mount her
|
||
there. She kicked, fought, so that though once my prick touched her
|
||
cunt-wig, I could not keep on the saddle. She forgot all propriety in
|
||
her fuddled excitement, and whilst screaching from my tickling, repeated
|
||
incoherently baudy words as I uttered them. "Let me fuck you." "You
|
||
shan't fuck me." "Let's put it just to your cunt." "You shan't,—you're
|
||
a blackguard,—oh! don't,—leave me alone,—wee I will feel it,
|
||
if you'll let me get up,—oh!—he! hi! hi!—for God's sake don't
|
||
tickle,—hi!—I shall go mad,—you shan't,—oh! don't,—oh I if you
|
||
don't leave off." "I shall,—I must." "Oh! pray,—you shall if you leave
|
||
off tickling then,—oh! don't pray,—oh! I shall piddle myself,—he!
|
||
he!" She was rolling on the floor, her thighs exposed, sometimes
|
||
backside, sometimes belly upwards with all its trimmings visible. "Oh!
|
||
it's your fault," and as she spoke actually piddle began to issue. I had
|
||
my hand on her thigh, and felt and saw it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Randy as I was I burst out laughing; and she man-aged to get up, began
|
||
to push in her neckerchief which I had torn out of the front of her
|
||
dress, and arranged her hair.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! look at me,—if any one came, what a state I am in," said she
|
||
looking in the glass, and there she stood her breast heaving, her eyes
|
||
swollen, her mouth open, and breathing as if she had just run a mile,
|
||
but attempting nothing, saying nothing further, awaiting my attack. What
|
||
randy, pleasureable excitement she must have been in, though unconscious
|
||
of it, whilst only thinking of how to prevent my fucking her against her
|
||
will.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You began piddling." "Didn't." "I felt the piddle on my hand." She made
|
||
no reply, but passed on, and wiped her face. When I said more she merely
|
||
tossed her head. "Don't be a fool Jenny,—let us,—you want it as bad
|
||
as me." Then I rattled out my whole baudy vocabulary, "prick," "cunt,"
|
||
"fuck," "spunk," "pleasure," "belly to belly," "my balls over your
|
||
arse," "let my stiff prick stretch your cunt,"—everything which could
|
||
excite a woman; to all of which she merely said, "Oho!—oh!" and tossed
|
||
her head, and never took her staring eyes off me, nor ceased swabbing up
|
||
her perspiring face, and at the same time looking at my throbbing, rigid
|
||
cunt-stretcher.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Finding she took to yelling, and even hitting me, I desisted a moment.
|
||
"Where is the book I sent you last night?" I had till then forgotten
|
||
it. That opened her mouth. "Have not had a book." "I saw the boy give
|
||
it you, and you open it." "He didn't." "He did." "I burnt it,—a nasty
|
||
thing,—I would not let my sister see it." An angry feeling came over
|
||
me for the moment, for I thought it probable, and should have had
|
||
difficulty in replacing it. Then came an inspiration to help me,—a man
|
||
always gets somehow on the right track to get into a woman if he has
|
||
opportunity. Nature wills it. The woman was made to be fucked, and the
|
||
sooner for them, the better for them.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You have not burnt it,—I'll bet it's in your bedroom,—in your box."
|
||
"It isn't." "I'll swear it's there,—you have been reading it all
|
||
night,—I'll go up and see." She started as if electrified into life as
|
||
I made for the door. She got there before me, and stood before me. "You
|
||
shan't go,—you've no business up there,—I've burnt it,—it's not
|
||
there." "It's in the kitchen then." "No, I've burnt it," she went on
|
||
rapidly and confusedly. "I'll go and see," said I pulling her from
|
||
the door, she screeching out, "No you shan't go up,—that you
|
||
shan't,—you've no business there." Then I pulled up her clothes to her
|
||
belly, she got them down, but still she kept her back to the door.
|
||
I kept pulling her till her cap was off again, and felt sure she was
|
||
getting weaker and weaker.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she turned round suddenly, opened the door, and ran up the stairs
|
||
rapidly like a lapwing, I after her. Once she turned round, "You shan't
|
||
come up," said she, and tried to push me back; and then again on she
|
||
went, I following. I stumbled, that gave her a few steps ahead; I sprang
|
||
up three steps at a time, recovered the lost distance, and just as she
|
||
got into the bed-room, and slammed the door to, I put my foot in it,—it
|
||
hurt me much. "Damn it, how you hurt my foot,—I will come in"—and
|
||
pushing the door my strength prevailed; the door flew open, I saw her
|
||
running round the bed, and there on the very pillow of the unmade bed
|
||
lay <i>Fanny Hill</i>, open at one of the pictures. I threw myself across
|
||
the bed, and clutched the book. She then stood motionless, panting and
|
||
staring at me, she had clutched at it, and failed just as I caught it.
|
||
She would have got it, but for having to go round the bed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I laughed. "Have you not had a treat Jenny dear!" Her face was a picture
|
||
of confusion. I was stretched half across the bed, and now went right
|
||
across. Then to escape me she ran away, and had nearly reached the door
|
||
when throwing myself over the bed again, I grasped her petticoats under
|
||
her arse, and managed to pull her back. "Damned if I don't fuck you,"
|
||
said I, "by God I'll shove my prick up your cunt if I'm hanged for
|
||
it,"—and pushing a hand up behind I clasped her naked buttocks. She
|
||
turned round, I pulled her petticoats clean up, she yelling, struggling,
|
||
panting, imploring. I dropped on my knees, kissed her belly, and buried
|
||
my nose between her thighs. The petticoats dropped over my head, her
|
||
belly kept bumping up against my nose and lips, which were covered with
|
||
her cunt-moisture.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I rose up, pushed and rolled her against the bed, my hand still up her
|
||
clothes. "Oh! don't, don't now,—you are a great gentleman they say,
|
||
and ought to think of a poor girl's ruin,—oh! if it was found out I
|
||
should be ruined." "It won't darling." I had got my fingers well over
|
||
the whole slit. "Pray don't,—well I'll kiss you,—there." "Feel it."
|
||
"Will you let me get up if I do?" "Yes." "There then," and she felt me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! I must fuck you." "Oh! pray don't,—oh! let me go now, and I'll
|
||
let you another day,—I will indeed sir,—oh! you hurt,—don't push your
|
||
fingers like that." "Kiss me my darling." "You shan't." "There there."
|
||
Another struggle. "Oh! I can't—be—bear it." Her arse began to twist
|
||
again, her head sank on my shoulder, her thighs opened; then with a
|
||
start, "Oh! my God it's lightning (it began to thunder and lighten
|
||
badly),—oh! I'm so frightened,—oh! don't,—another day,—it's wicked
|
||
when it's lightning so,—oh! God almighty will strike us dead if you are
|
||
so wicked,—oh! let me go into the dark,—oh! don't,—I can't—be—bear
|
||
it." Her arse was shaking with my groping and frigging.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Now don't be a fool,—damned if I don't murder you if you are not
|
||
quiet!" "Oh! oh!" I had got her somehow on to the bed, she was helpless;
|
||
with fear, liquor, and cunt-heat. I threw myself on to her. A feel
|
||
between thighs reeking with sweat, with her cunt in a lather, with the
|
||
sweat dropping in great drops from my face, with sweat running down
|
||
my belly on to my prick and my balls; I shoved. One loud "aha!" and my
|
||
prick-tip was up against her womb-door. A mighty straight thrust; and
|
||
the virginity was gone at that one effort.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Right up there with but a shove or two as far as I recollect, and
|
||
without trouble, my sperm spouted directly my tool rubbed through the
|
||
wet, warm cunt-muscles. Then I came to my senses; where was I? has she
|
||
let me, or had I forced her violently.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She laid quietly under me with closed eyes and open mouth, panting; I
|
||
was upon her, up her, pressing heavily upon her rather than holding her;
|
||
then thrusting my hands under her fat bottom I recommenced thrusting and
|
||
fucking. She lay still, in the enjoyment of a lubricated cunt, distended
|
||
by a stiff, hot prick. Soon she was sensitive to my movements, her cunt
|
||
constricted, a visible pleasure overtook her, her frame began to quiver,
|
||
and the soft murmurs of spermatic effusion came from her lips. She
|
||
spent. On I went driving as if I meant to send my prick into her womb,
|
||
fell into a half dreaminess, and became conscious of a great wetness
|
||
on my ballocks; it was her discharge more than mine, the most copious I
|
||
recollect, excepting from one woman. Then I dropped off on her side. She
|
||
lay still as death, the thunder rolled over us unheeded by her in the
|
||
delirious excitement and delight of her first fuck.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She turned on her side slightly, her thighs and backside were naked, she
|
||
hid her face, and shuddered at the thunder unheeding her nakedness, then
|
||
buried her face in a pillow, and so we both dozed for a minute or two.
|
||
Her backside was still naked, when I looked at her in all ways as she
|
||
lay, and saw traces of sperm on her thighs and chemise. A little lay on
|
||
the bed, but no trace of red, no signs of a bloody rupture of a virgin
|
||
cunt. My shirt and drawers were spermed, but had not a trace of blood.
|
||
The light fell full on her backside, I could see lightish brown hair
|
||
in the crack of the parting of her buttocks; a smear of shit on
|
||
her chemise. Her flesh was beautifully white. She had on nice white
|
||
stockings, and the flashy garters; she dad a tolerable quantity of hair
|
||
on her quim on the belly side. I sat at the side of the bed, got off
|
||
boots, trousers, and drawers; then laying down gently inserted my
|
||
longest finger and delicately began rubbing her clitoris which I could
|
||
see protruding of a fine crimson color. Then she moved; she was not
|
||
asleep, but dazed by the fuck, fear of the lightning, the excitement,
|
||
the heat, and the fumes of the wine combined.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She stared at me, pulled down her clothes, and tears began to run down
|
||
her cheeks. What a lot of women I have had cry at such times "Don't cry
|
||
my darling." She turned on to her face, and hid it. For a quarter of an
|
||
hour, I talked, but she did not answer. I told her she had spent, that
|
||
I knew she had had pleasure. Then I pushed my fingers up her cunt; still
|
||
she did not speak, but let me do just what I liked, keeping her eyes
|
||
shut. So soon as my rammer was up to the mark, up her it went fucking,
|
||
and again I felt it's stem well wetted. She was a regular streaming
|
||
spunker.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After that, "I am going downstairs," said she. "I'll come." "No don't."
|
||
"You only want to piddle." "Yes," said she faintly. "Piddle here,—what
|
||
will it matter?" "I can't." "I'll go out if you won't bolt the door."
|
||
"It's no good bolting the door,—you have ruined me." I went outside,
|
||
closed the door, and heard the rattle in the pot. When I re-entered she
|
||
was sitting at the side of the bed crying quietly; she did nothing but
|
||
look at me, but without speaking. "Arrange yourself in case any one
|
||
comes to the door." "No one will come." "The milkman?" "He will put it
|
||
down inside the porch." She sat down the picture of despair. Never had
|
||
I felt more lewd, I was mad that day with lewdness. "Let's feel your
|
||
cunt," said I. "I have spent in it three times." "I don't care what you
|
||
do, you may do what you like,—it's of no consequence." I felt up her
|
||
cunt, she hung her head over my shoulders whilst I paddled my fingers in
|
||
the wet. "Don't hurt me," said she. "I have not hurt you."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Yes you have." "Let's look." That roused her. "Oh! no,—no,—no,—you
|
||
shan't." "Wash your cunt" I fetched the sherry, but she had not washed
|
||
her cunt. "You should wash it out." "Oh?—oh!" said she, "if I should be
|
||
with child I shall never be married."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She drank more sherry, and promised to wash. Then I went downstairs,
|
||
fetched up the broach and the ten sovereigns, and gave them to her. "How
|
||
shall I say I got it?" "Does he know how much you have saved?" "Yes."
|
||
"Is it a year's wages?" "Yes,"—and she began to cry again. "What shall
|
||
I say about the broach?" "That you bought it,—let's lay down and talk."
|
||
She yielded instantly, I threw up her clothes, she pushed them down.
|
||
Then I lay feeling her quim, and got out her bubbies, she submitted,
|
||
laying with her eyes closed, till my rubbing on her clitoris made her
|
||
sigh. Then up her, I felt her wetting my prick-stem, and shot my sperm
|
||
into her at that intimation of her pleasure.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was about seven o'clock, I had been nearly five hours at my
|
||
amusements, and was tired; but had that day an irrepressable prick. It
|
||
began to stiffen almost directly it left her cunt. I went down with her
|
||
to tea, there I pulled her on to my lap, and we began to look at <i>Fanny
|
||
Hill</i>. I could not get a word out of her, but she looked intently at the
|
||
pictures. I explained their salacity. "Hold the book dear, and turn over
|
||
as I tell you." Then I put my fingers on her cunt again. How sensitive
|
||
she was. "Let's come upstairs." "No," said she, reluctantly, but up
|
||
we went, and fucked again. Then she groaned, "Oh! pray leave off,—I'm
|
||
almost dead,—I shall have one of my fainting fits." "Lay still darling,
|
||
I shall come soon,"—but it was twenty minutes hard grinding before my
|
||
sperm rose.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she laid motionless and white through nervous exhaustion,
|
||
excitement, and loss of her spermatic liquid, which I kept fetching and
|
||
fetching in my long grinding. She told me afterwards that she could
|
||
not tell how often she spent. I had never been randier or stronger, nor
|
||
enjoyed the first of a woman more.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was a most extraordinary girl. After the first fuck she was like
|
||
a well-broken horse; she obeyed me in everything, blushed, was modest,
|
||
humbled, indifferent, conquered, submissive; but I could get no
|
||
conversation out of her excepting what I have narrated. She cried every
|
||
ten minutes, and looked at me. After each fuck she laid with her eyes
|
||
closed, and mouth open, and turned on her side directly, putting her
|
||
hand over her quim, and pulling her clothes just over her buttocks.
|
||
Then after I had recovered and began to talk, a tear would roll down her
|
||
cheek.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
About nine o'clock she said. "Do go, my sister will be here,—and the
|
||
bed wants making." At the door I put her against the wall and rubbed
|
||
as well as I could my flabby cock between her cunt-lips. She made no
|
||
resistance. "We'll fuck again to-morrow Jenny." "I'll never let you
|
||
again," said she, "for you shan't come in,"—and she shut the door on me
|
||
with a slam.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0019"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XIX.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
My soiled shirt.—Jenny's account of herself.—Fucking and
|
||
funking.—Poor John!—-Of her pudenda.—It's
|
||
sensitiveness.—Erotic chat.—Startled by a caller.—Her
|
||
married sister's unsatisfied cunt.—How she prevented having
|
||
children.—Doubts her husband's fidelity.—Jenny taught the
|
||
use of a French letter.—Hickery-pickery, and catamenial
|
||
irregularities.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When I got home I looked at my linen; never had it been in such a mess
|
||
after female embraces. I had taken no care about it, it was be-spunked
|
||
in an unusual degree, and lots of thinnish stains were on the tail which
|
||
made me think that one or both of us must have spent copiously. Then I
|
||
recollected that Jenny's cunt seemed very wet to me when I felt it after
|
||
I had spermatized her. There were no signs of blood, and taking stock of
|
||
the sensations I had experienced, "Jenny has had it before," I said
|
||
to myself. Then came a fear that her discharge was from a clap, but I
|
||
dismissed that from my mind. I had only once had the clap from a woman
|
||
not gay.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
So I washed the tail of my shirt, laid it under my arse to dry, gave it
|
||
a natural stain of piss, and went to bed reflecting and wondering who
|
||
had first penetrated Jenny's privates.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
A day or two afterwards I went to see her and shammed a knock. She
|
||
opened the door. "Oh!" she exclaimed as I entered, "now you shan't,—you
|
||
shan't again." "I shan't what my dear?" "I know why you came here,—but
|
||
you shan't." "I want a chat,—-don't be foolish,—come here,—I won't do
|
||
anything,—I don't want anything,—but come here."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I got her into the parlour, and on to the sofa, then talked, then got
|
||
baudy. "Do just let me feel your thighs,—what harm can it do when
|
||
I have been between them." "No". "Just a feel,—there I won't put my
|
||
finger further,—oh! Jenny you like my finger,—be quiet dear,—just let
|
||
me feel it." Half an hour after she had said, "Now you shan't," my prick
|
||
was in her. No woman can refuse the cock which has once stretched her
|
||
cunt, she is at its mercy. We spent another afternoon in talking and
|
||
fucking, and she partly in crying and bemoaning her evil deeds.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had not only opened her cunt, but opened her heart and mouth at the
|
||
same time. She was the funniest, frankest little woman I ever knew. She
|
||
told me all her past life, her future expectations, asked my advice,
|
||
deplored her wickedness to her young man, and all in an hour. She spoke
|
||
the same incessantly afterwards. In a fortnight I knew everything about
|
||
her from her birth, and about all her family; it was as if for the
|
||
first time in her life she had had a confident.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What shall I do with your money?" "Put it with the rest." "But he knows
|
||
what I've got,—we always tell each other." "Keep it to get a good stock
|
||
of clothes before you are married." "But he knows all about my clothes."
|
||
"Put it in a little at a time, or don't tell him till you are married;
|
||
then say you kept him in ignorance for a pleasant surprise, or tell him
|
||
nothing at all about it,—you will have more than that." "I don't want
|
||
your money, I fear it will bring me harm."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Well give it back to me Jenny." But Jenny did not seem to see the
|
||
advantage of that; so she kept it, and had more besides in time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What will become of me and poor John?—he'd die if he knew how ill
|
||
I behave to him,—now don't,—you do upset a body so a talking, and
|
||
putting your fingers there,—oh! leave me alone,—no no more." "Once
|
||
more dear,—how hot your little cunt is,—it's longing for a prick." "Oh
|
||
I take care of my cap, you will tear it,—I'll take it off." "What a
|
||
fat backside you've got Jenny,—how wet your cunt is,—shove, shove,
|
||
fuck,—where is my prick Jenny now?" But Jenny became speechless always
|
||
after three cock-shoves, and began moistening the intruder with all her
|
||
cunt-power.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
After fucking she was tranquil for a time; sperm seemed to soothe her,
|
||
but then she had funks. "Oh I dear what have you made me do? oh! if I am
|
||
in the family way!—oh! if he finds it out, he won't marry me! and he is
|
||
such a good young man, and so fond of me,—o—o—-ho—ho!—I've behaved
|
||
very bad to him,—and I didn't mean,—oho!—it's all your fault, oho!
|
||
—I didn't know what I was about,—I never do when it lightens,—oho! Do
|
||
you think he will find it out when we are married?" she would ask in
|
||
her calmer moments, after she had cried herself out. This scene occurred
|
||
every day I fucked her for a time, then less frequently.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I tried to comfort her, told facts, and many inventions of my own, of
|
||
how I had had women, who afterwards married and whose husbands had never
|
||
known that they had been broached.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Is it true really!—oh! do tell me the truth,—if he finds it out I
|
||
will drown myself, I'm sure he will,—it's all your fault,—you must be
|
||
a bad man to take advantage of a poor girl in the house alone." "But if
|
||
you're not in the family way, he can't find out until you are married,
|
||
and then it will be too late. You won't tell him, and your cunt can't
|
||
speak." "Oh! sir you do say such funny things."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
This went on for weeks. "Oh! it's my time, and it's not come on." Then
|
||
with joy, "Oh! I'm all right, but you can't do anything to-day,—oh! if
|
||
my Mistress should find out, or if my sister should come home and catch
|
||
you here,—oh! if the next-door neighbours should see you come here so
|
||
often, and tell my Mistress." One or another of these fears was always
|
||
upon her, but did not prevent our fucking. At that time Sarah was away,
|
||
and Louisa Fisher still ill, so Jenny had all my essence; and later on
|
||
as much as Louisa and Sarah spared me. As to my home, I had pretty well
|
||
done with fucking there.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny's cunt was well-haired, and had rather large inner lips; not so
|
||
large as I have seen in many women, but larger than I liked. Her tube
|
||
was easy. What a fight I had when first I saw it. "I won't be pulled
|
||
about like that,—no it's shameful." "I dare say your John has seen it."
|
||
That always sent her off howling, and when she had subsided she let me
|
||
do as I liked. "It's a nasty thing to pull me about like that." But
|
||
it came soon to the old world-wide habit: a feel and a look before the
|
||
entry. The same woman who won't let you see the bottom of her belly at
|
||
first, will hold her cunt open for your inspection in a month. It
|
||
is breaking in a woman to baudiness which is the happiness of the
|
||
honeymoon, not the hard burst through a bit of gristle.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It had weighted on my mind ever since I had had her, and about three
|
||
weeks afterwards I told her my doubts of her then being a virgin.
|
||
She swore that no man had even put his hands on it till I did. "Am
|
||
I different from other woman?" She was indignant at the doubt, and
|
||
honestly and truly I believe. A schoolfellow used to look at her quim,
|
||
she at her schoolfellow's, she always thought hers was the most open of
|
||
the two, she always could put her finger up easily, "but you did hurt me
|
||
through, though I did not bleed. My sister says she did bleed a little
|
||
when she first had her husband,"—and Jenny now described her sister's
|
||
first night, and her sister's form, and rather wetted my lust for her
|
||
sister.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I came to the conclusion that she was born loose at her inlet, or had
|
||
broken through the cover when quite young, and that no prick had
|
||
rubbed her but mine; but her organ was a peculiar one in it's habit of
|
||
distilling its liquids.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I have told how my shirt was stained at first, and soon found that Jenny
|
||
was one of those women who spend rapidly, frequently, and copiously. I
|
||
have met I think two like her in my career, to the time I correct this.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On the second day's poking I noticed this and became fully aware of it
|
||
afterwards. When I put my prick up her, and began my movements; a
|
||
shiver and a sigh escaped her almost directly, her bum gave a heave,
|
||
a discharge came from her, and if I pulled my prick out then, it was
|
||
perfectly wet. It used in fact to run out a little, and if pushing one
|
||
hand well under her arse (which was not so easy, for she had a fine
|
||
backside), I felt the root of my prick, or rather the end of the stem,
|
||
I could feel her moisture running down one of her bum-cheeks, or
|
||
between them. That over by the time I spent we usually discharged
|
||
simultaneously. Her voluptuousness was greater when we spent together,
|
||
than on her preliminary discharge. She said she could not account for
|
||
it, but that a delicious sensation crept over her the moment the prick
|
||
entered; that her cunt tightened and seemed to wet itself copiously;
|
||
that her spend at the climax was longer, more thrilling, voluptuous,
|
||
satisfying, and exhausting; that when our spunks had mingled her whole
|
||
body was satisfied; but that her first spend seemed only to confine its
|
||
pleasure to her cunt. It is difficult to describe these sensations.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I frigged her several times, and got a copious discharge from her, thin,
|
||
milky, and barely sticky, yet it left a strong stain on linen. She was
|
||
astonished when I told her of her peculiarity. Perhaps she wondered what
|
||
her poor John would think of it. I can't say I altogether admired her
|
||
wetness; I took a dislike to a tall thin girl who was much of the same
|
||
sort as Jenny, but that girl was quite slippy-cunted, though not with
|
||
the whites. This was since.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
(Another woman who had this sensitive and sensuous [for it was both]
|
||
organization, was the sister of an intimate friend, and whom I have
|
||
fucked since the above was written. I don't know that I shall say
|
||
anything more about the lady, so tell of her cuntal peculiarity here.
|
||
She was plump, fair-faced, had a fine complexion, and in face strongly
|
||
resembled the queen. She was to be married.)
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When her young man came to town, and Jenny went out with him, the girl
|
||
upbraided herself. When I next saw her after his visit she felt herself
|
||
a deceiving wretch, and cried. Now would I please desist, and not make
|
||
her sin any more. But the persuasion was too great, the recollection of
|
||
her pleasure too strong, and never did I go away without having plugged
|
||
her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Did she love her young man? Yes she supposed she did; he was kind,
|
||
attentive, and would make a good husband. She wanted to get married, to
|
||
have a home of her own; besides he was not a workman, but a tradesman,
|
||
and when married they would have a shop, and be in a higher position.
|
||
She always spoke more of the house and shop, and her liberty, than of
|
||
her young man.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was of a highly nervous organization, and through me she was to be
|
||
shocked severely. She half fainted the first day I took liberties with
|
||
her, thunder and lightning gave her an inclination that way, twice
|
||
afterwards she nearly fainted, any sudden thing annoyed her and turned
|
||
her white. One occasion I'll tell of now, the other in due course.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We fucked on the sofa after the first day; but though large, it was not
|
||
like a bed, so afterwards we used to go to her bed-room. I used to leave
|
||
my hat and stick downstairs, so that in case of surprise I might stand
|
||
in the hall, and say I had called to enquire. It was a stupid thing to
|
||
do as I found out, and then I used to take it into the bed-room. I had
|
||
fucked her one afternoon, when a double knock came at the street-door, I
|
||
knew it. "It's my wife," I said. Down I rushed for my hat, and returned
|
||
to the bed-room; and then Jenny opened the door. She had called to make
|
||
some enquiry, and went away. I heard the door close, but no further
|
||
noise or movement, then crept downstairs.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
There sat Jenny on a chair, just recovering from a half faint. "Oh!"
|
||
said she, "I nearly dropped down." "Ah! she would have knocked you down
|
||
my dear, if your cunt could have spoken and said what was inside it."
|
||
But Jenny never could joke. It was always dreadful, and she was to be
|
||
punished in some way for her evil deeds with me. A few tears, and then a
|
||
little baudy chaffing brought smiles again on her face.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I delighted in talking baudy to her, told her smutty stories about the
|
||
women I had had, described their charms, and any special lasciviousness
|
||
connected with them. Her astonishment was great; her curiosity intense;
|
||
she in return told me all she knew about every other woman, and all her
|
||
own little baudy doings. Never was a woman so frank about such matters.
|
||
When I left her I doubt whether her dear John could have told her half
|
||
what she could have told him about fucking, and the two articles that
|
||
copulation is done with.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Her talk was all about her sisters, and principally of the married one
|
||
who came to sleep with her; a woman about twenty-eight years of age,
|
||
who had been married some years, and had two children, the last one four
|
||
years old. She, or rather he, did not mean to have any more, they could
|
||
not afford to keep them. "How did they stop it?" I asked Jenny. She did
|
||
not know. But one night the sister wanted particularly to sleep at home,
|
||
and had asked Jenny if for once she would sleep in the house alone. She
|
||
consented though frightened. I proposed sleeping with her, and we passed
|
||
a very delicious night together: a man and woman fresh to each
|
||
other, always do in bed. What a night of feeling, frigging, sniffing,
|
||
inspecting, and fucking it was!
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At all times, no matter what we began talking about, cunt and cock were
|
||
sure to become the subject. That night I learned that her sister had
|
||
slept away, expecting to catch her husband out in some infidelities.
|
||
Since he had determined to have no more children, he made her frig him
|
||
instead of fucking; so the sister went short of cock and had to frig
|
||
herself. That annoyed her. Then when he fucked her he did not do it
|
||
properly, he cheated her sister, Jenny said. I was a long time in
|
||
getting out of Jenny what the man did, at length she said, that just
|
||
as the stuff was coming, he pulled it out, and it went all over her
|
||
sister's thighs or her belly, and often before she had had her own
|
||
pleasure. Her sister thought it was just as well not to be married, as
|
||
to go on like that.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
That was not all. He used at first to do it every night, and now not
|
||
once a week, said he could do without it, that he did not care about
|
||
it, and so on. She believed that he had other women, and that was more
|
||
aggravating because she wanted it herself more than ever. She was not
|
||
so well, she told Jenny for want of fucking, she liked it, and would
|
||
willingly have more children though she was so poor. I asked cautiously
|
||
if she had heard of the skins which people put over their pricks, and
|
||
into which they spent their seed? Jenny had not. I explained what they
|
||
where. She said she would ask her sister about it. I cautioned her about
|
||
showing that she knew too much. A few days afterwards Jenny told me her
|
||
sister had tried them, but they did not like them, besides they could
|
||
not afford them. What Jenny's sister paid for French letters I don't
|
||
know, I used to pay nine pence each. I fucked Jenny with one on just to
|
||
instruct her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
These two women talked often about such matters; and each day Jenny told
|
||
me what her sister had said. Soon I knew all about her sister's doings,
|
||
from the night she lost her virginity to the birth of her last child.
|
||
The little fucking that the sister had, and her longing for more
|
||
affected me considerably; I quite longed to see this hot-bummed,
|
||
cunt-neglected wife, and soon my curiosity was to be gratified in a way
|
||
I little expected.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny and I settled down quite matrimonially, I saw her certainly four
|
||
days a week, or else every day excepting Sundays. At times I spent the
|
||
whole day there, took wine, and meat, and newspapers. She cooked, and
|
||
very badly. We ate and drank together, and fucked, she cried about John
|
||
and her wickedness, and her fears of being found out. Then I read to her
|
||
the news, and also every baudy book I could get hold of, and explained
|
||
to her every use that could be made of our tools, both male and female,
|
||
from flat-cocking to buggery, so far as I knew,—but I did not know so
|
||
much as I do now.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To prevent its being known I was there, we got quite cunning. I was not
|
||
to come at eleven o'clock, because then the butcher came; nor at twelve,
|
||
because the girls were always at the window next door; between one and
|
||
two o'clock I was safe, because the family was always at dinner at that
|
||
time; at three the milkman came, and I avoided him. So with a little
|
||
trouble I pretty well escaped observation, during the eight or ten weeks
|
||
which I did husband duty, and perhaps as much as some two husbands would
|
||
have done.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Once she was awfully uneasy, for her courses had not come on, and shed
|
||
flood of tears. She would lose her John, poor fellow! When in that
|
||
way she was always pitying him, but she was always irregular in her
|
||
menstruation, which rendered it difficult to judge of her condition. Oh!
|
||
she was sure she was now in the family way, she had symptoms; she had
|
||
asked her sister how she had felt when she had conceived, and her own
|
||
symptoms were the same. "My God what shall I do!—I'll drown myself,
|
||
I will,—I shall never be able to face him,—poor fellow!" "Go and
|
||
get something, go and see some one." She went, took a dose of what she
|
||
called "hikery-pikery," and the ugly red stream came on. I don't believe
|
||
she was in the family way. Years after I heard she had never had a
|
||
child, though long married.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0020"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XX.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
A Saturday afternoon.—Copulation interrupted.—Retreat cut
|
||
off.—Under the bed.—Enter sister.—The new dress.—Heat
|
||
and sweat.—Undressing.—Jenny's anxiety.—Sweating much,
|
||
and stripping.—Nature in its simplicity.—Nature in its
|
||
vulgarity.—Delicious peeps.—A cunt near my nose.—Erotic
|
||
recklessness.—Fist-fucking.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
And now I was to become acquainted with her sister,—the married one.
|
||
Jenny had no brother, had none of that knowledge about boy's cocks which
|
||
girls of the humbler classes have when they have brothers. I sometimes
|
||
think that boys in the humbler classes show their cocks to their
|
||
sisters; I don't recollect a girl I have fucked who did not say she had
|
||
seen her brother's cock.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
My knowledge of her sister's dissatisfaction with the small amount of
|
||
fucking she got, her disappointment at having her husband's sperm on
|
||
her thighs instead of up her cunt, and her very reasonable fears that at
|
||
times it went into other receptacles besides her own, came forcibly to
|
||
my mind. It would have been odd if it had not, for every time I poked
|
||
Jenny we talked about her sister, indeed all our talk, unless about her
|
||
sweetheart, and her fears was about fucking. I don't recollect any woman
|
||
I have had who was so anxious to know all, and delighted to hear of my
|
||
amours, and the descriptions I gave of my various women. If I described
|
||
their cunts she was amused beyond measure; and to tell all this suited
|
||
me exactly. For all that she thought it wicked, and that they and I, and
|
||
she, would be punished by the Almighty (her ideas about the action of
|
||
Providence were peculiar).
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
It was the good fortune of her married sister to give me one of the most
|
||
laughable, but yet natural, salacious, voluptuous treats I ever had,
|
||
without her knowing she had done so,—and from that came consequences
|
||
which affected that lady herself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I have always been highly delighted to see modest women naked or
|
||
undress, or doing their toilet and little affairs, when they had no idea
|
||
that any one saw them. I have looked through dozens of key-holes, bored
|
||
holes in doors, waited breathless and half-naked for hours at night,
|
||
have risen by day-light to enable me to get these treats. I had seen as
|
||
already said, the cunts of my aunt and cousins, young ladies and others
|
||
bathing, etc. (and as I shall tell of, have since seen a noble lady frig
|
||
herself.) I have seen in fact modest ladies at their most decent, as
|
||
well as the most indelicate of their toilet performances, and think
|
||
I prefer looking at them under such circumstances, rather than at the
|
||
beautiful voluptuous creatures who undress willingly in my presence, for
|
||
those are so intent on displaying their charms to the best advantage, to
|
||
get a male erection and its crisis, as soon as possible, make much too
|
||
evident what they do it for.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny's sister gave me one of those natural displays. Had the lady been
|
||
drilled in the art of unfolding her charms for the excitement of a male,
|
||
and driving him into erotic fury, she could not have more effectually
|
||
done so. Of the many displays of female charms (of modest females)
|
||
I have seen, I never had one so gradual, natural, voluptuous, and
|
||
cock-stiffening, as she unconsciously gave me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I called on Jenny one Saturday afternoon, she had said I had better go
|
||
quite early, but I did not. It was another sultry day, thunder had been
|
||
heard, the atmosphere was heavy, but no rain had fallen; and the sun was
|
||
bright and blazing hot. Said Jenny, "I'm frightened to let you stop, my
|
||
sister is going to leave off work early, and she will be here about five
|
||
o'clock,—don't come in." I would. "We shan't be half-an-hour,—it's
|
||
not half-past three." A kiss, and a twiddle on her cunt settled the
|
||
matter, and we went to her bed-room. She was on the bed, I between her
|
||
thighs, ready to drop into her, indeed I'm not sure that my prick had
|
||
not touched her cunt, when a knock and a ring came at the street-door.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
To fully understand what follows it should be known that the old lady
|
||
my friend, for fear that the rooms should be used; had locked up all the
|
||
rooms but the parlours and a little closet overlooking the street, and
|
||
the servants' bed-room, and had taken away the keys. I did not know that
|
||
then, I knew it that day.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! my God it's my sister,—what shall I do?—I shall be ruined." Pale
|
||
as death, I thought she was going to faint again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't be nervous, I'll go and hide in the room below, and when she is
|
||
downstairs or up here, go out quietly, and leave the street-door ajar."
|
||
"Oh! all the rooms are locked up." "I'll go into the parlours then,
|
||
—you get her downstairs." "Oh! she always goes into the parlour first,
|
||
and sits down a minute, and talks." There was no time for us to talk,
|
||
more, for the woman knocked again. "Fetch my hat and stick (it was in
|
||
the parlour),—you get her into the kitchen, then I'll slip out leaving
|
||
the street-door ajar." Down we both went, three stairs at a time, up
|
||
I went again with hat and umbrella, and had only got to the top when
|
||
I heard poor trembling Jenny opening the street-door. I leant over the
|
||
banisters, and listened.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I've knocked twice Jenny." "Did you?—I was dozing,—the thundery
|
||
weather makes me so queer.—Have a cup of tea, and take a table out
|
||
into the garden,—it will be fresher there to have tea."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"No I've got my new dress, it will rumple it if it's long in the bundle,
|
||
I must open it. Such a pretty one,—you will like it I think.—Tom did
|
||
when I showed him the pattern,—I'll take it up to the bed-room, and
|
||
hang it up."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny's voice rose almost to a shriek. "Oh! no, no, don't,—come and
|
||
have tea first,—I'm so thirsty, so tired,—come downstairs." "Well you
|
||
go and make it, I'll only just hang it up in the bed-room, and come down
|
||
directly," said her sister.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny objecting, the sister answered angrily, "What are you in such a
|
||
hurry for tea for?—it's not time,—well have it by yourself, I can't
|
||
drink it,—I had a lot of beer at dinner, and Tom gave me nearly a pint
|
||
before I left him,—it was so hot, I was so thirsty,—it's on my chest
|
||
now,—I can't put tea on the top of it yet." "Well if you won't, I may
|
||
as well go up with you," said Jenny. Footsteps came nearer, and hat,
|
||
stick, and self, I threw under the bed. Jenny came in looking like
|
||
death. "She won't find me here,—get her down soon," was all I had time
|
||
to say in a whisper before the sister following Jenny entered the room.
|
||
I had quite hidden myself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The bed had been a good one, the old gentleman and lady had slept on it
|
||
for years; it was large and handsome, but being shabby and worn out, had
|
||
that very month only been put to servants' use. Round it were old red
|
||
valances hanging to the floor, things not given to servants. No sooner
|
||
was I under the bed, than I saw there were little openings at the seams,
|
||
and some moth-holes, which permitted me to see through them. At one spot
|
||
near to my shoulder as I lay crouching and doubled up, was a long slit
|
||
where the valance had been torn down. By raising myself on my elbow,
|
||
and squeezing my head against the mattress I could see perfectly, but
|
||
no person in the room would have noticed me, even though the room was as
|
||
bright as day, for the thick red hangings hid me in darkness under the
|
||
bed, and I was on the side away from the window. I gazed earnestly at
|
||
Jenny's sister through this opening and others.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She was a well-grown, strong woman, with a handsome round face, and dark
|
||
hair and eyes; she had shortish petticoats, and thickish ankles in good
|
||
lace-up boots which, made much noise as she walked about. She had a
|
||
huge paper parcel in her hands, which she placed on the bed; then for a
|
||
moment she rested her bum on the bed-side, and Jenny did the same by the
|
||
side of her. The parcel was between them, her ankles were within a few
|
||
inches of my nose; I gently lifted the valance, and saw up the calf of
|
||
her legs, her petticoats cut as they were in those days, being drawn up
|
||
by sitting down. I remember almost every word, every action which took
|
||
place on that memorable afternoon, and not a movement escaped me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I can't untie it,—cut it." "The scissors are downstairs." "I'll go and
|
||
fetch them." "Oh! no,—where is the knife that I cut my corns with?" "Oh
|
||
I never mind,—there, I've done it,—I've broken it,"—and she rose up
|
||
as did Jenny from the bed, and both now stood standing facing the side
|
||
of the bed where I lay.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I heard the rustling of paper, the rustling of a dress, the noise of
|
||
feet paddling about. "Oh! it <i>is</i> nice,—what did it cost?—who made
|
||
it?" "I made the skirt, and Miss Skinner the body,—she charged me seven
|
||
and six,—it's not dear, is it?—I'll hang it up, then the creases will
|
||
come out." "Let's hang it up first." And then on a peg at the back
|
||
of the door the dress was hung up, and for a moment, both women stood
|
||
admiring it, their backs towards me and the bed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Look," said the sister, "it just wants a little something done to the
|
||
sleeves,—she said it was not finished there,—oh! yes here it is,—I
|
||
would not wait for her, I can easily do it myself,—I was glad to get
|
||
it, and half feared I should not get it for Sunday,—the old beast never
|
||
keeps her promise, but she has this time,—I gave her sixpence
|
||
extra. Oh I my gracious how hot it is,—I'm sweating all over,—it's
|
||
awful,—I'll pull off my frock, then I'll finish the sleeves as it hangs
|
||
up,—get us the needle and thread Jenny,—just thread a needle dear,
|
||
while I pull off my frock."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't," said Jenny in an agitated manner, "let's have tea first." "No
|
||
I must finish it," and as she spoke she undid her dress, and slipped it
|
||
off. A beautiful handsome pair of breasts came in view. "Oh! Lord look
|
||
at my chemise,—look how I've sweated—see how the stain from the dress
|
||
has gone through under my arms,—I stink of sweat,—how glad I shall be
|
||
when the weather is cooler." As she said that with a slight effort she
|
||
drew her arms through the sleeves of her chemise, and lifting her
|
||
freed arms showed a pair of black hairy armpits. I began to thrill and
|
||
cock-stiffen. She lifted her fine arms up, and looked at the stained
|
||
chemise as it hung over her stays, then with a heave and a push she
|
||
freed her breasts, so that they were right over the top of her stays
|
||
showing the nipples; then with naked arms, she began to work at the
|
||
sleeves of the dress hanging up behind the door.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny was all this time moving about in a restless manner, taking every
|
||
now and then a hurried glance at the valance of the bed which concealed
|
||
me; and as it seemed to me placing herself in such a position, as
|
||
to prevent my seeing her sister's upper nakedness; but it was quite
|
||
useless, I could see all she had exposed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She worked a few minutes talking to Jenny, who was making as much noise
|
||
with her feet as she could. Then the sister looked up, and leaving off
|
||
her needlework said, "This will make Tom want to do it to me,—a new
|
||
dress always does, when he sees me in it,—he ain't done it lately, he
|
||
will to-morrow." They both laughed, and she went to work again.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Again she stopped, Jenny then seated herself at the edge of the bed over
|
||
me. "Oh! how awfully hot I am,—what a bore petticoats are,—I declare
|
||
I've a good mind to leave them off this weather." She stepped forwards.
|
||
"I'll take them off, I can slammack about to-night,—no one will see
|
||
me." "Oh! no don't," said Jenny in an excited way; but she quickly
|
||
unlaced her stays, untied her petticoats, and slipped them down to her
|
||
ankles. Her chemise which was no longer held up to her shoulders by the
|
||
arms, slipped down with them, and she stood naked before me excepting
|
||
her boots and stockings. She seemed to have forgotten that her chemise
|
||
was no longer held up, for just as the petticoats fell below her cunt,
|
||
she made a slight grasp as if to hold them up, then she gave a laugh,
|
||
"That's cool enough," said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't,—what are you doing?" shrieked Jenny, "put on your
|
||
chemise,—you're naked,—you're naked,"—and she tried to pull up the
|
||
chemise; but the woman stepped away from the clothes as they lay on the
|
||
floor, caught up the chemise, threw it on the bed, and placed petticoats
|
||
and stays on a chair by the washhand stand. I saw large hips, a mass of
|
||
dark hair at her cunt, a large white backside, fine round thighs, and
|
||
limbs; in brief a fine, plump, well-fed woman, a splendid sight. The
|
||
innocence of the action was beautiful. "Oh! isn't it nice and cool," she
|
||
said, "I've got so hot walking."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Put on your things,—what are you doing?" said Jenny. "Oh! isn't it
|
||
nice!—I wish one could go in one's skin this weather," she replied. She
|
||
scratched her motte-hair, and felt her arse, and seemed so pleased with
|
||
herself. Then she looked under each of her armpits. "Oh! Lord how hot I
|
||
am,—where is a towel?" She took one, and began gently rubbing herself
|
||
with it under her armpits, put it down, and again scratched the hair of
|
||
her motte.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'm surprised at you," said Jenny walking about, and I'm sure trying
|
||
to prevent me from seeing her sister, though she always declared to me
|
||
afterwards that she had no such intention. "Cover yourself, you'll catch
|
||
cold." "Catch cold?—nonsense,—and you have the window shut also,—what
|
||
do you shut it for?" "Oh! I can't bear it open in thundering weather."
|
||
The fact was we always shut it when we went to the bed to exclude noise,
|
||
and left the door open, to hear if any one knocked at the street-door.
|
||
"Put something on you at all events," said Jenny, "it's not decent."
|
||
"Decent?—you <i>are</i> modest all of a sudden."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"It's delicious!" She walked round the bed to the window, opened it,
|
||
came back naked as she was, and went on working at her dress; and so for
|
||
a quarter of an hour did I see this handsomely-made woman naked, first
|
||
her side, then her belly, then her bum came in view, till I was driven
|
||
mad by the state of my penis which was throbbing with excitement, and
|
||
urging me to frig it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Well that will do," she said as she finished, "the creases will never
|
||
be noticed where they are,"—and she walked backwards to the bed, the
|
||
short distance she was from it, and sat down at the edge just where the
|
||
valance had dropped. With care I pulled the valance, and the seam opened
|
||
more, but not much. I raised myself on my elbow, my eyes to the opening.
|
||
There were the thighs and legs stretching out to the floor, her bum
|
||
was at the mere edge of the bed, her cunt but about six inches above my
|
||
nose. I had a wonderfully keen scent for the aroma of a woman, and swear
|
||
I smelt her cunt distinctly, though I could not see it. She sat there
|
||
for full five minutes, talking to Jenny about the dress, whilst I kept
|
||
sniffing up the aroma from her flesh and her love-orifice, and feeling
|
||
my quivering prick, whilst my greedy eyes gloated on the fat thighs, so
|
||
far as I could see them.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
At length she turned round. "I'll put my slippers on,"—and sitting down
|
||
opposite the bed on the chair on which she had placed her petticoats,
|
||
she put one leg up, and began unlacing the boot, then between and under
|
||
the thighs I saw the dark hairy notch. She had scarcely put herself in
|
||
that attitude before putting her foot down, she came to the bed, put one
|
||
foot up, and there continued unlacing it,—and there was her cunt just
|
||
visible, and within a foot of my greedy eyes, whilst she leisurely
|
||
unlaced the boot on the bed, the other foot on the floor. Had I placed
|
||
her there for the purpose I could not have done it better.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! don't," said Jenny, "take your foot off." "What's the matter?"
|
||
replied she as if just noticing Jenny's excitement, "you've got one of
|
||
your foolish fits on I think." "You will dirty the bed,—take your foot
|
||
off." "Nonsense it's quite dry, besides it's on my chemise,—I wish
|
||
you'd go and make tea, if you are in such a hurry,—one would think you
|
||
had got St. Vitus' dance,"—for Jenny in her agitation, and also to make
|
||
noise to prevent any indiscreet movement of mine being noticed, had kept
|
||
moving about noisily and restlessly the whole time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Silenced, she said no more, but still walked restlessly about, went at
|
||
the back of her sister, and glared at the valance where she guessed my
|
||
eyes were peeping. Her face was the picture of anxiety. But I did not
|
||
look at that long, I was rivetted on her sister's form and dark-haired
|
||
cunt; that cunt was at times slightly opened by the attitude she was in,
|
||
and altered its shape as she moved. I saw the thick dark hair curling
|
||
away until I lost sight of it in the direction of her arse-hole, and I
|
||
could smell her cunt again I swear, my excitement grew intense, I could
|
||
not keep my hand from my prick, I knew the delicate position I was in,
|
||
the injury I should do the poor girl if found out;—but a spend in sight
|
||
of that cunt and splendid pair of thighs I must have. I just touched
|
||
myself, holding my breath restraining all emotion, gave one or two
|
||
frigs, and a shower of sperm fell over my trowsers. If any man might
|
||
be pardoned for having a solitary pleasure, it was I, placed in such a
|
||
lust-stirring situation.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0021"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XXI.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Further undressing.—Slippers wanted.—Toilet operations.—
|
||
The effects of hash and beer.—A windy escape.—Feeling for
|
||
the pot.—Sisters exeunt.—A crushed hat, and soiled
|
||
trowsers.—A narrow escape.—My benevolent intentions
|
||
towards Jenny's sister.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I thought I had had my pleasure in silence, but I was wrong, I was
|
||
heard, I had given a slight sigh. The anxious ears of poor Jenny heard
|
||
it. She made increased noise whilst her sister went tranquilly on, and
|
||
unlaced her boots without taking any notice or hearing me, whilst the
|
||
last drop of sperm was running over, and I was still looking at her
|
||
cunt, and sniffing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she stood looking at her boots. "Ah! this one wants soling,—where
|
||
are my slippers?—where did I put them?" They were just under the
|
||
bed, close by me. "Here they are," said Jenny rushing to the side, and
|
||
pulling them out she gave them to her sister who took them, but instead
|
||
of putting them on pulled off both her stockings. "I'll wash these
|
||
to-night," said she, "and darn them the first thing to-morrow,—I'll cut
|
||
my corns." "Oh! do come down and have tea,—you can cut your corns after
|
||
you have washed your feet to-night,—oh! put something on, and come." "I
|
||
won't be long,—you go and make tea." "No I shan't, I know you'll be
|
||
an hour,—it will be spoiled." "I can cut them so much better by
|
||
daylight,—I cut my toe last Saturday night you know," and without more
|
||
ado she walked round the foot of the bed to the other side, where in
|
||
front of the window was a small dressing-table, a looking-glass, and a
|
||
chair by the side of it. She was now absolutely naked from head to foot.
|
||
As she neared the window she said, "Oh! how delicious the air is blowing
|
||
upon one's skin,—I quite hate putting on my chemise again." Jenny still
|
||
kept moving about, and shuffling her feet; but the sister engrossed in
|
||
herself, kept on talking about her dress, her Tom, the place she was
|
||
going to on the morrow, and seemed to notice nothing. At length she
|
||
placed one foot on the chair by the window, and began cutting her corns.
|
||
And now I had a view of her backside and naked form from that side of
|
||
the bed.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When she had finished one foot, she put it down, and sat on the edge of
|
||
the bed. "Poof! how hot it makes me stooping,—it makes me sweat,—but
|
||
I'll do the other,—drat the tight boots, they make corns,"—and up went
|
||
the other foot. Out went my head, and up went the valance, but I was
|
||
fearful of being seen, so took out my pen-knife, and cut a long slit in
|
||
the valance. Then my eye was never still to her buttocks, but I could
|
||
not see her seat of pleasure so well, so I took to the floor again, and
|
||
saw her cunt better.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she stood for a minute looking over a little white blind into the
|
||
gardens. "There is Mrs. B——- and her daughter walking." "Oh! pray put
|
||
something on,—if they should see you." "Impossible they can't,"—and
|
||
she stooped down, and began operating on the other corn. The cunt opened
|
||
a little and so did something else, for out popped a pretty loud, short,
|
||
sharp fart.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You beast," said Jenny. "I beg your pardon," said the sister, "I'm
|
||
always windy when I have eaten hash, and drank beer,—I could not help
|
||
it." "It's dirty," growled Jenny. "You're far enough off, and it's
|
||
better out than in,"—and ceasing to chuckle, and as if half ashamed of
|
||
herself she went on corn-cutting without speaking, but that did not suit
|
||
Jenny who soon began a conversation, and shuffling about. She made no
|
||
further allusion to the fart.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When she had finished it only seemed as if I had been looking at her
|
||
there for a few seconds, but on that side of the bed she must have given
|
||
me ten minutes of that lascivious gratification. I was so engrossed,
|
||
so delighted that even the fart did not amuse me; it annoyed me; for
|
||
it made her alter her position, and withdraw from my lustful gaze, that
|
||
charm which perhaps no one but her husband had ever gazed upon so long
|
||
and so earnestly.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then she went back again to the other side of the bed, put on stockings
|
||
and slippers, and getting up, "Where is the pot" said she, "is it this
|
||
side or the other?" and began feeling under the valance within a few
|
||
inches of me, but it was not there. Evidently it was usually there,
|
||
indeed I know it was, but Jenny and I both pissed before we began to
|
||
think of fucking, and I had put the pot under the washing-stand.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Not there," shrieked Jenny rushing to the pot. The sister turned
|
||
round and saw it, I peeped just in time to see her thighs open as she
|
||
squatted, then came a heavy thump on the bed. The sister said, "What's
|
||
the matter?—-don't give way,—don't be a fool now." Then without
|
||
pissing she got up, and came to the bedside. Poor Jenny excited beyond
|
||
bearing by anxiety, had fainted on seeing her sister on the point of
|
||
discovering me in searching for the pot.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She shook Jenny, threw water on her face, and Jenny soon recovered.
|
||
"What on earth's the matter?—you give way, you do,—a woman need not
|
||
faint like that, I'm sure," said she angrily, "you scared me dreadful."
|
||
Jenny said nothing, but repeated that she wanted her tea, that thundery
|
||
weather always made her feel sick and faint.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Well we will go down at once,—I did not think you were ill." "You
|
||
might have seen I was." "I did not, but I'll be ready in a minute."
|
||
Again she squatted on the pot, thighs wide open, belly towards me,
|
||
pissed like a water-spout, and let one or two little farts of which no
|
||
notice was taken, whilst I with cock stiff was looking on, and again
|
||
frigging myself. I could not help it, for every turn, every movement
|
||
she made was such as if done expressly to show off her naked charms, and
|
||
drive me randy-mad.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Give me my night-gown Jenny, it's at the foot of the bed, and I'll only
|
||
put my dress over it,—it's so hot." Jenny turned to take the night-gown
|
||
from the bed. "I'll just wash a bit," said her sister, "I'm almost in a
|
||
lather with heat and sweat." Pouring out water in the basin she placed
|
||
it on the floor, and turning towards the bed squatted, and sluiced her
|
||
cunt, then rubbed it dry with the towel. "That has made me comfortable,"
|
||
she remarked, and began putting on her frock.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
As she did so she remarked, "You have not emptied the pot to-day,—you
|
||
should, it smells this hot weather." "Yes I did," said Jenny innocently.
|
||
"Well then you've peed a lot." "I've done it once or twice since
|
||
morning," said Jenny hastily.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then the sister went out first. When half-way downstairs I emerged from
|
||
my hiding-place and listened, heard Jenny say, "I may as well empty the
|
||
slops, you go and see if the water boils." Up came Jenny. "Oh! I'm
|
||
ready to die,—hish!—be quiet." She emptied the pot and waters into a
|
||
slop-pail, and went downstairs quickly whilst I followed her silently.
|
||
I was covered with flue, and had managed to crush my hat; my trows-ers
|
||
were partly unbuttoned, and one leg covered with spunk. We got to the
|
||
ground-floor almost together, and there I stopped. So soon as I heard
|
||
she was in the kitchen I moved along the passage, and slipped out,
|
||
leaving the street-door ajar. Luckily a cab was close by, and I jumped
|
||
into it. The first thing I did was to button up properly. I bolted past
|
||
my servant as she opened the door to me, took another hat, wrapped the
|
||
old one up in paper, and the same night tore out the lining, and threw
|
||
both away in a bye-road.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was in an indescribable state of excitement after this delicious
|
||
afternoon, and was seized with an almost delirious letch for the woman.
|
||
I was sleepless for a night or two, scheming how to possess her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Early on the Monday I got to Jenny's, and spent the rest of the day
|
||
fucking, and talking of the sight I had seen. My imagination helped to
|
||
allay my excitement, for the form of her sister though more beautiful
|
||
than Jenny's had still a family likeness to her, and as I clasped Jenny
|
||
in my arms I pictured her as her sister, and enjoyed her as such.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I was cautious in my disclosures, for I found that Jenny who had been
|
||
most inquisitive about other women, and delighted to hear about how they
|
||
talked, and walked, and pissed, and fucked; was annoyed when I talked of
|
||
her sister's nakedness. I ought not to have looked,—why I had seen more
|
||
than she, her own sister,—a poor woman, and married, and she to have
|
||
her thing looked at by a strange man,—her husband could not have seen
|
||
more,—and so on. So though I described her sister's charms I took care
|
||
not to express any admiration of them, nor to say I had frigged myself,
|
||
and felt desire for her. Jenny had not noticed that my trowsers were
|
||
undone, and sperm-soiled. I had not noticed that myself till I got out
|
||
of the house on that eventful afternoon.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On the Monday when I saw Jenny, she declared that another hour's anxiety
|
||
would have killed her. We found that the time from the minute the sister
|
||
came into the bed-room, to the time she went downstairs was two hours.
|
||
Jenny thought that she must have been half-an-hour working at her dress.
|
||
Jenny had walked round the room trying if she could see me, or if I was
|
||
looking, but could only do so once or twice at the holes, or fancy she
|
||
did; but the long tear in the valance through which I could see with
|
||
both eyes at once, and just above which her sister had put up her legs,
|
||
she had never noticed; nor did she believe me when I said that I could
|
||
see the cunt when her sister's backside was towards me, when near the
|
||
window. So I made her lie down, and look from the floor whilst I stood
|
||
naked, pretending to cut my corns. Then she said it was a shame of me to
|
||
be peeping. She had a clear inspection from my bum-hole to my ballocks,
|
||
and knew I had seen the cunt.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She did not contend any longer. "Do you mean to say, that if you had
|
||
been under the bed, and had known a naked man was cutting his corns, you
|
||
would not have peeped out?" No she would not; but had it been a naked
|
||
woman perhaps she would, Jenny replied. So after she had heard from me
|
||
how much I had seen of her sister's body, between her back-bone and her
|
||
navel, and I had told her something which made her say, "Law has she!"
|
||
though I can't recollect what it was, the subject dropped. Then I learnt
|
||
from her more about her sister's wages, mode of life, and where she
|
||
worked; for although the thing seemed ridiculous, I had a letch, and
|
||
meant to try to put into that young woman if possible, though I had not
|
||
then stroked Jenny many weeks. I liked variety.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0022"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XXII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
The Sunday following.—Chaste calculations.—The sister
|
||
alone.—My embarrassement.—Ale fetched.—Warm
|
||
conversation.—Stiffening.—Bolder talk.—An exhibition of
|
||
masculinity.—A golden promise.—Lust creeping.—Baudy
|
||
dalliance.—Cock and cunt in conjunction.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
On the following Sunday her young man was coming to London, and she was
|
||
to spend the day with him at his relatives. Her sister was to keep
|
||
the house, the husband was going elsewhere, so the sister would be
|
||
alone,—all provided it was fine weather. Jenny had promised her
|
||
Mistress that until her return she would never go out with her young
|
||
man, and that is how Jenny kept her word. She knew I would not tell,
|
||
would I?—I felt her cunt, and kissed her. "It's not very likely, is
|
||
it my pet?" Then she snivelled, said she was very wicked, and hoped God
|
||
would not punish her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When I heard of this arrangement I lusted strongly. In vain I said to
|
||
myself, "What again a married woman! in comfortable circumstances for
|
||
her class, with two children,—a woman you have never spoken to,—can
|
||
you expect to get her!" I did not expect it, but had a burning desire to
|
||
see and speak to her, to look closely at, and have a chat with a woman
|
||
whose privates I had seen so nakedly. It seemed to me to promise a
|
||
titillating treat. Besides I had been so successful with women,—gay
|
||
women had even been anxious to get me,—that a half-belief came over me,
|
||
that if I had time, I could persuade even her to let me. Time was the
|
||
difficulty, for she did not yet even know me by face (so I thought, but
|
||
was wrong). At all events see her I would,—she was dissatisfied with
|
||
her fucking, that I knew; she might be randy, and then be much less
|
||
impregnable than she seemed; so I determined to see her on the Sunday
|
||
that Jenny went out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I could think only of one powerful means of getting her, if anything
|
||
encouraged a hope, and that was by money. I had not too much then,
|
||
though getting better off, but determined if ten pounds would tempt her,
|
||
that she should have it. I was a long time I recollect pondering over
|
||
the sum. The Sunday turned out fine, I put the gold in my purse, and
|
||
went to the house just after their dinner-time, and after my luncheon,
|
||
at which I fed myself up well, and to give me courage took an extra
|
||
glass, for I had one of my nervous fits of funking come on, mixed with
|
||
doubts about the morality of deliberately trying a married woman.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She opened the door, I walked straight in. "Who are you?" "Where is the
|
||
housemaid?" said I, "I have promised Mrs. W——-to call and see from
|
||
time to time." "Oh! I'm her sister sir, my name is——-, I sleep here
|
||
every night sir, Mrs. W——- pays me to do so sir,—my sister is out
|
||
sir,—I'm very sorry, but she is not at all well from being confined to
|
||
the house so much,—I told her she might go to church,—it would be a
|
||
change, and give her a little fresh air;—she will be back at half-past
|
||
four sir." "Oh! so you are Mr. So-and-So?" "Yes I am." I walked into the
|
||
parlours. There was a large beer-jug and two tumblers on the table, and
|
||
ale in one glass. She rushed to take them away. "I beg pardon sir, but
|
||
Mrs. W——— said we might sit in the parlours, when we have done work,
|
||
and on Sundays besides, cause it's so dull in the kitchens." The woman
|
||
was agitated at her sister being out, and at being caught drinking beer
|
||
in the parlour; she thought I might make mischief, I suppose.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I told her that she need not disturb herself, for I should not stay
|
||
long, and kept looking with cock already stiffening into her face,
|
||
then at her arms, then at the bottom of her belly, and in my mind's eye
|
||
seeing the dark hair down there. I had planned conversation, but forgot
|
||
what to say, through thinking of her nakedness and sexual charms; and
|
||
stood staring at her till she turned her eyes away confused, and colored
|
||
up.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I continued to be embarrassed, and so lost recollection of all I had
|
||
intended to say and do, that I was actually going away. I asked one or
|
||
two stupid questions: if letters had come, if any one had been, and so
|
||
on; all the time thinking that I was looking through her clothes at her
|
||
naked charms. I was in a sort of a trance of baudiness which muddled me;
|
||
when noticing the ale-glass I asked, "What are you drinking?" "Fourpenny
|
||
ale sir." That reply broke the spell, my senses returned, I thought of
|
||
an excuse for stopping. "Give me a glass,—I'm thirsty." "That's the
|
||
last of it sir." "Can't you get some?" "The pot-boy brought that,—it's
|
||
Sunday, and the public is not always open." I looked at my watch. "It's
|
||
not church-time yet, send some one to fetch some,—I'm so thirsty, and
|
||
hot, and so tired,"—and I sat down. "I'm alone." "Is not your husband
|
||
here?" "No, no one." "Do you mind fetching me some?" "If you don't
|
||
mind waiting sir." "No." I gave her money. "How much?" "Oh! fill the
|
||
jug,—not with fourpenny,—with the best ale,—ask them to draw it
|
||
mild, and get me two bottles of ginger-beer". In a few minutes she was
|
||
back,—I had given her a five shilling piece. "You may keep the change."
|
||
"Thank you sir", said she quite touched and delighted. I always gave the
|
||
change to girls whom I wanted to poke.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
In her absence I went all over the house that was not locked up, even to
|
||
the privy and coal-cellar, had satisfied myself that she was alone, and
|
||
was getting quite myself again when she came back.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Have a glass." "Thank you sir." "So you are Jenny's sister,—Jane's her
|
||
name I think." Yes it was. "Aren't you afraid to be in the house of a
|
||
night?" No she was not. "Sit down." "Thank you sir,"—but she stood. "So
|
||
you are an upholstress,—sit down,"—and after a little pressure down
|
||
she sat. We took ale together, and no doubt I spoke with all that
|
||
kindness which a man shows towards a woman whom he desires to poke, I
|
||
have heard women say that I have a winning, persuasive manner.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Gradually the conversation became about herself. "You've two
|
||
children,—why not more?" "Oh! quite enough for poor people." "Well you
|
||
see I can't get any." "Poor people are sure to have lots." "Two is not a
|
||
lot,—how manage to stop at two?" "Oh! it's all chance." "Is not another
|
||
coming?" She was getting flushed and excited. "Lord no, I hope not."
|
||
"Don't you know?" "I don't." "Yes you do,—how old is your last?" "Four
|
||
years." "If I were your husband I'd have a dozen." "Well you say <i>you</i>
|
||
haven't any yet sir," said she. "No I can't get any." "Ah! if we had
|
||
your money!—but with we poor people is different,—it's hard enough to
|
||
fill the bellies of two." "And so you won't have your belly filled with
|
||
another little one,—won't you, eh!"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Oh! Lord," said she laughing spite of herself, "you are plain-spoken."
|
||
I was in the vein now, did not say an improper word, but gave baudy
|
||
hints, smutty suggestions about the dullness of sleeping alone, of the
|
||
results of wives being away from husbands, etc., till her eyes twinkled,
|
||
and she laughed much. I had now broken down the barrier, had brought
|
||
myself to her level, and she as every other woman would have done, took
|
||
advantage of it, and began to return my chaffing and banter, every
|
||
woman feels instinctively that when a man is chaffing her (be it ever so
|
||
decently veiled), about fucking, that she may safely return it: both are
|
||
at once on a common level. A washerwoman would banter a prince, if the
|
||
subject was cunt, without the prince being offended. To talk of fucking
|
||
with a woman is to remove all social distinctions, and I had done it
|
||
without uttering at first a smutty word.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny's sister went on chaffing, and drank ale freely. "Oh! I dare say,
|
||
but why don't <i>you</i> have children?" "I can't get any I tell you, but I
|
||
try." "Not much at home," said she, "from all I have heard." "No I try
|
||
out as well, and get none,—I'm a safe man." Then I found she knew a
|
||
lot about me and my affairs; She had actually worked at my house on some
|
||
curtains, had seen me once, and knew my voice, though for the moment she
|
||
had not recollected my face with my hat on when I entered the door that
|
||
afternoon. But I had never seen her at my house to my knowledge, though
|
||
if I had I was not likely to have noticed a common upholstress.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We went on chaffing, looking in each other's faces, each knowing we were
|
||
talking about fucking. "Well Mrs.——— playing at mother and father's
|
||
a delicious amusement, is it not?" "I don't know." "If you don't
|
||
know we'd better try,—I'd give five pounds to be your husband for
|
||
an hour,—and five pounds would buy you anew dress." "It would buy me
|
||
three," said she without noticing the other part of my remark. "Three?"
|
||
"Yes three,—I can't afford more than thirty shillings for a best
|
||
dress." "Really!—such a beautiful creature as you ought to have plenty
|
||
of dress, for I have rarely seen a more lovely woman, and so well
|
||
grown,—I'll bet you have fine limbs." She was flattered, the praise
|
||
upset her, her eyes tinkled. Yes she might have done better she knew,
|
||
but it was to be. I went close to her, caught and kissed her. She made
|
||
not too strong a resistance, but got away. "That's going a little too
|
||
far." "That's the beginning of a game at mother and father, and you are
|
||
going to have the three dresses." She laughed in a funny way. "I don't
|
||
want to be a mother any more, so I don't want any games." But she seemed
|
||
to me to look as if she did.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
What did she get for stopping at the house? Five shillings a week, and
|
||
her supper and breakfast,—that was an object. "Five shillings?—why
|
||
my kiss was worth that,—let me give you another, and I'll give you
|
||
ten shillings for the two." "You don't mean that," said she with a low
|
||
laugh. "On my soul yes,—but you must give me a kiss as well." She
|
||
shook her head. "It's going too far," said she. "There it is, I'll trust
|
||
you,—you won't take it without letting me." She was then sitting. I put
|
||
the half sovereign into her hand. "Thank you sir," said she softly. I
|
||
kissed her rapturously, she let me kiss half-a-dozen times, and whilst
|
||
doing I so took hold of her hand, and pressed it as if by accident
|
||
against my cock. She a married woman knew the hard line her hand pressed
|
||
against, for she moved her hand away. "Now your promise,—kiss me." "I
|
||
didn't promise." "You took the money." "There then," said she giving me
|
||
a kiss, and jumping up sharply, "we are going too far,—we really are
|
||
now,—we don't either of us know what we are about I think." "I don't
|
||
think I do," said I, "for though I never saw you before, I've never been
|
||
so struck with a woman in my life, I'd give ten pounds to be in bed with
|
||
you an hour."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had been putting my cock straight in my trowsers, feeling and
|
||
squeezing my balls whenever I saw her looking at me. I fancied she kept
|
||
looking askant at that part of my person. She was getting red in face,
|
||
hot, and confused in manner. Just then I observed a bed pillow on the
|
||
sofa, she had I guessed been laying down after dinner. "Why here is
|
||
a pillow,—you've been on the sofa with your husband,—you have been
|
||
playing at mother and father here." She burst out into laughter. "Why
|
||
I've not seen him for a week." "Then you've been tickling by yourself."
|
||
"Tickling?" (it was said quite innocently.) "Yes between your legs."
|
||
"Oh! really now you are a going too far sir," said she jumping up again,
|
||
"you speak too freely,—I don't like it." Then she laughed, and said,
|
||
"Well—this—really is,—oh!"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Not at all,—you are lovely, exquisite, delicious,—if you've really
|
||
not seen your husband for a week, let me,—who will know?—we are in the
|
||
house alone,—let us,"—and standing close to her I put my arms round
|
||
her, but I felt afraid of going too far.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"You must not talk like that." "Oh! nonsense,—I'll give you six
|
||
pounds." "Oh! no, you don't mean what you say,—it's wild talk." I took
|
||
out my purse, and putting six pounds on the table in gold, just as I had
|
||
done to her sister the ten pounds; there said I, "That is yours,"—and
|
||
pulled out my prick. She got up, and ran to the other side of the room
|
||
as if I had pulled out a pistol. "You're talking too plain sir,—it's
|
||
going too far,—if you expose yourself like that I'll go to the
|
||
street-door." I'm at a loss to know why I pitched upon six pounds, I had
|
||
intended ten, but cannot tell why I offered that particular sum. I have
|
||
often thought since, of what made me take that economical figure.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Sit down." "I won't if you expose yourself,—it's not gentlemanlike." I
|
||
put my cock into my trowsers, then kissed her again, resistance was not
|
||
so strong. "Now sir don't." "Sit down my darling,"—and getting her to
|
||
the sofa we went on talking. "How foolish,—who would know,—why not
|
||
delight me,—why not take the money." "No." "Do now." "No." "Won't you?"
|
||
"Of course not,—no,—no." "Well kiss me." "There then." "Do let me
|
||
dear." "I won't,—I won't,—I shan't,—there."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Just then I noticed one of her garters was hanging down by her foot.
|
||
"Your garter's undone," said I. I stooped forwards, and took it up.
|
||
"Give it me." I kissed it. "No,—it's been so near where I want to go,
|
||
—I shall keep it till I've been there." "You will keep it a long time
|
||
then."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She drank more ale, it was sweet and strong, and I went on talking.
|
||
Thought I, "She must want it if she has not seen her husband for a
|
||
week." Where did she garter.—below or above knee? "Let me feel?" I felt
|
||
outside, then pinched the leg, then higher up. She began looking me full
|
||
in the face, and laughing at my smutty insinuations. I pulled her back
|
||
on the sofa, kissed her, and let her rise up again. I repeated the pull
|
||
and the kiss more than once, and then as she was rising up and saying,
|
||
"Now don't pull me about like that," I put her hand on my prick which
|
||
I had slipped out again. "Oh!"—and she let it go. Quick as lightning
|
||
I slipped a hand up her clothes to her cunt. "Let me now,—there's a
|
||
darling." "I shan't." "Do." "I shan't." She repulsed my hand, but did
|
||
not get away from me. I thought from the way she looked at me, and the
|
||
quiet manner in which she pushed away my hand, that she was hot with
|
||
lust, and could scarcely refuse me. I pulled her to me, and got my
|
||
finger on her clitoris. "Do let me feel your cunt, and fuck,—put my
|
||
prick in there,—let us,—do darling," said I twiddling like mad, and
|
||
rattling out a volume of baudiness.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She bore it all for a minute quietly, wriggling and saying, "I
|
||
shan't,—I won't,—no, now take your hand away." Then with a sudden
|
||
impulse she pushed me off, got up, and sat down further from me on the
|
||
sofa. "Oh! now be quiet,—let me think a minute,—I don't know whether
|
||
I'm on my heels or my head." She picked up something which had fallen at
|
||
her feet, as she had doubled herself down when my finger was stimulating
|
||
her randiness.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then catching her by her waist I pulled her back on to the sofa, and
|
||
threw myself on her. "You shan't" were the last words I recollect her
|
||
uttering; as I threw up her clothes and felt the wet gash. My prick the
|
||
next instant was buried in it, and we were fucking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Don't,—oh.—take it out,—do,—oh!—oh!—ohoe!" she murmured. She
|
||
had fetched me, and pump; pump, pump, pump, went my spunk up her. Then
|
||
delicious oblivion. As I came to myself I found her arse still moving.
|
||
"Oh! do" she murmured. She was besides herself, with desire to spend.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But my prick instead of obeying me as it usually did on such exciting
|
||
occasions, refused, and shrinking left her cunt, to my intense vexation.
|
||
"I haven't done it," said she softly, and with disappointment as her bum
|
||
ceased its labors, and my tool lay dropping outside her quim.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
We spoke no more, but I lay trying to squeeze it up again. To stiffen it
|
||
I felt up and round her, rubbed the tip on her spermy nymphoe, she made
|
||
gentle efforts to second me, but it was of no use, so I rolled off.
|
||
She sat up, and after looking at me for a minute with eyes filled with
|
||
baudiness, began like all women, to feel if her hair was all right.
|
||
"Were you just coming my dear?" She made no reply.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
She had not taken any care to arrange her dress, it had dragged up
|
||
behind her bum, and the petticoats were up to her knees, the leg which
|
||
had lost its garter was half naked. Taking her round the waist I put my
|
||
hand on to her cunt, and titillated the clitoris. She let me go on,
|
||
and continued feeling about her hair. Then looking me full in the
|
||
face, looking as if she were ready to spend, she pushed me away.
|
||
"Don't,—don't,—I don't like it done that way." "You can do it that
|
||
way yourself, can't you?" "Of course I can." "I shall soon fuck again."
|
||
"Oh! I dare say," and she walked to the looking-glass, then went to the
|
||
window, and looked out into the garden without paying any heed to my
|
||
exciting remarks. I sat on the sofa feeling my cock, and trying to
|
||
stiffen it, but it was useless; so I tried to interest her in something
|
||
else, feeling annoyed, though I had nothing to be ashamed of.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<a name="2HCH0023"><!-- H2 anchor --></a>
|
||
|
||
<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div>
|
||
|
||
<h2>
|
||
CHAPTER XXIII.
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<pre>
|
||
Jenny's bed-room.—The money hid.—On the bed.—Fears of
|
||
maternity.—Inspection of sex.—The use of a husband.—
|
||
Another Sunday.—Regrets and refusal.—Resistance overcome.—
|
||
Jenny's ignorance.—Her Master returns.—Difficulty in
|
||
getting at Jenny.—Her sister waylaid.—Against a fence.—
|
||
Jenny's marriage, and rise in life.
|
||
</pre>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Why don't you take the money?" said I. "You really mean it?" "Of
|
||
course." She took it up. "It's a real God-send,—it comes just in
|
||
time,—who'd have thought it?" said she as if to herself. "I must put
|
||
it where it can't be found, and take it home to-morrow." She went to
|
||
the door. "Aren't you going?" "No I'm going to do it again soon." "But
|
||
you're not." "But I am." Without reply she went upstairs. I had meant to
|
||
have ready a stiff-stander, when she came back, but changed my mind, and
|
||
followed her. She was nearly at the top when hearing me she waited, and
|
||
said, "What do you want?"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I'm coming to see what you do." "You won't." "I will." "I'll come down
|
||
and wait till you are gone." "I'll stop till your sister comes home."
|
||
"Do go down sir," said she in a coaxing tone. "No." She sat down on the
|
||
top-stairs, I did the same a few stairs below her. Her knees were wide
|
||
apart, my mind went to the afternoon when I had seen her naked. That
|
||
glorious two hours. I stared in a voluptuous reverie, her cunt was as
|
||
visible to me through her clothes, as if she were naked, and my cock
|
||
began to swell. I stared on without uttering a word.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"What are you staring at?" said she at last, "go down, and I'll be down
|
||
in a minute." "I'm looking at your cunt, it's open slightly, I can see
|
||
my spunk in it." "Oh!" said she jumping up, "I never heard such a man in
|
||
my life." (She had the gold still in her hand.) "You have upset me so,
|
||
I don't know what I am about." She then turned her bum round towards
|
||
me, and I put my hand quickly up her clothes, as she went up the stairs.
|
||
"Oh! you frighten me so I don't know what I'm doing." I followed her
|
||
into the room, and she locked up the money in a bag that was in a
|
||
drawer. Turning round she saw my prick out, and as stiff as ever. It was
|
||
the recollection of what had taken place in that room on the Saturday
|
||
week previous, which had rendered me capable again. I closed on her,
|
||
kissing and inciting her, pulled her to the bed, and began feeling
|
||
her. "I don't like that done,—you know you can't,—leave me alone,—go
|
||
down,—oh! don't."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I coaxed her for a second. She got on to the bed, and opened her thighs
|
||
wide like a well-trained fuckster to help me, I inserted my penis, and
|
||
she met me with passion. I was not so rapid, the want of a spend was
|
||
not now overpowering my senses; whilst she had had two hours baudy talk,
|
||
been fucked, but cheated of her pleasure, and been left at the critical
|
||
moment, unsatisfied, with my spunk in her. She was dying for a spend,
|
||
wanting it like a woman who has been for a week unsatisfied. Her cunt
|
||
was hungry for prick, throbbing and tightening to pour out it's amatory
|
||
juices, her backside's movements became quick and fierce.
|
||
"Oh! it's big," she gasped whilst I was still sensible,
|
||
"oh!—I'm—com—coming,"—and gluing her mouth to mine she spent
|
||
copiously ere I'd well nigh began to feel the full urging of lust.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The constriction of her cunt, the delight of feeling her pleasure
|
||
increased my stiffness. "Let me wash,—do." "You won't come on the bed
|
||
again." "Yes I will, but let me wash." I clutched her like a vise. "NO
|
||
I'm coming,—you'll spend again." My prick stiffer and stiffer drove
|
||
with fury up against her womb. "Oh! don't push so hard." "Fuck my
|
||
darling,—there,—the tip's only in,—it's in your spunk, and mine
|
||
together." "Oh! you hurt." On I drove. Her backside's play began, her
|
||
lips were glued to mine, our tongues played against each other, and we
|
||
spent together with ejaculations. "Oh!—don't,—you hurt,—oh! oh!—I'm
|
||
coming." Then we lay palpitating, my prick throbbing and soaking, her
|
||
cunt squeezing and sucking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Let me get up,—let me wash,—pray do." I laid on her heavy, nestled my
|
||
balls up to her arse, held her as long as I could; but uncunting me she
|
||
got off the bed, and washed her cunt. I still lay playing with my prick.
|
||
"You'll have a child this day nine months my dear." "Oh! my God don't
|
||
say so,—but I believe I shall." "You are all right, I don't get them
|
||
you know." "Have you never had any children!" "None at home." "Oh!
|
||
that's nothing,—have you any out, for you are a gay man?"
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I got up to piss, and saw my thick sperm in the basin. "You've washed it
|
||
all out my dear,—you are safe." She shook her head. "This is a
|
||
strange business," she remarked, "I scarce know where I am,—what I'm
|
||
about,—it's impossible,"—and she stood staring at me playing with my
|
||
cock. Then she went to the drawer and looked at the money, as if she
|
||
doubted its being there. "It's a fact," she said locking it up again,
|
||
"are you not going down?" "No." "I wish you would,—I want to be by
|
||
myself." "You want to piddle." "You are a strange man," and taking the
|
||
pot she pissed. "You'd better empty all," said I, "if your sister Jenny
|
||
comes back and sees it, she will think your husband's been doing it
|
||
to you." "She won't think or know anything if she does see," said Mrs.
|
||
———"Well I declare I'm a talking to you just like my husband,—I
|
||
don't seem to know whether I am on my head or my heels."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"Church must be over,—Jenny has not come back." "She won't be back till
|
||
nine o'clock, she is out with her young man." "Oh! not at church?" "No
|
||
I told you so because Mrs. W——-told her not to go out on Sunday;—but
|
||
you won't tell?" "Of course not my dear, I dare say Jenny and her
|
||
young man have done what we have been doing." "Lord sir, he is a
|
||
most respectable young man, and far above her,—they are going to be
|
||
married,—she is lucky, luckier than I am,—she'd knock his head off
|
||
if he laid hand upon her improperly,—that she would, she! Lor bless
|
||
you,"—and Mrs. ——— laughed with incredulity. I laughed also. "Ah!
|
||
she looks a quiet young woman." "So she is, and so is he,—his family is
|
||
well off,"—and then she told me all that Jenny had told me.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
"I wish you would let me make the bed." "I'm going to have you again."
|
||
"Oh! likely." "I am." "No you're not,—please go." "No." "Then I shall
|
||
go downstairs," "Go my dear." She took me at my word, her manner had
|
||
quite changed, she had been laughing and chaffing, she had blushed,
|
||
looked at me with fun and lust in her eyes, and at last with full open
|
||
eyes one moment, followed by the half-dosed eye and languishing manner
|
||
of a randy woman. Now she was quiet, almost sullen, and if she looked at
|
||
me her eyes fell directly, the randiness had been taken out of her. "I
|
||
must rouse it up well if I am to have her again," said I, to myself as I
|
||
lay thinking about her, and the delicious sight I had seen in that room,
|
||
the sight I never dare disclose to her,—but how I longed to tell her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Up she came looking glum. "Are you not going?" "No." "Let me make the
|
||
bed then." "Not until I have had you again." "Then it will go unmade."
|
||
"That won't matter to me." "But it will to me,—what will my sister say
|
||
if she sees the bed's been laid upon like that?" "Perhaps she will think
|
||
a man has been with you." "Well you take it mighty cool,—I do
|
||
hope you're going." "Not till I've had you." "Now you are a talking
|
||
nonsense,—you know you can't do it," said she with an incredulous look,
|
||
and the tone of a woman who knew what a prick could do and what not.
|
||
"Look at this," I uncovered my prick which was nearly at a full-stand.
|
||
She smiled when she saw it. "Nonsense I am ashamed." "My dear I'm proud,
|
||
and not ashamed,—come." "I shan't." "Then here I'll lay,"—and I fell
|
||
back, and pulled balls and cod well out of my trowsers.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I had always a lust stirring tongue, fifty women have told me so. "You'd
|
||
talk any women randy," said a gay woman once to me. Brighton Bessie
|
||
said, that in five minutes I could talk her into a lewd state. Others
|
||
have given me similar compliments. I was not specially conscious of that
|
||
power that I recollect, but instinctively used it when I had got over
|
||
fits of modesty, which sometimes prevented my uttering even veiled
|
||
allusions for a time.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Mrs. ——— like Jenny was easily flattered. What lovely limbs she had
|
||
I said; had she much hair on her cunt? my excitement had prevented me
|
||
feeling or seeing it. "Come and let me feel,—let me look." She colored
|
||
and blushed, and at every lascivious remark, "Oh! I never,—no I never
|
||
did,—oh!" Then she again went to the drawer where the money was,
|
||
looked in it as if to make sure it was there, and locked the drawer now.
|
||
"Mine's bigger than your husband's, isn't it?" "Well if I ever heard
|
||
such remarks." "You said it was big when it was up you." "Oh! you
|
||
story." "You did my dear, you said when you were just coming, 'Oh! it's
|
||
big.'" "I didn't." "<i>Yes you did</i>, you know you did,—look how stiff it
|
||
is now,—come." "I won't."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I moved off the bed, caught her, and pushed her against the side of the
|
||
bed. "Let's see your cunt." "You shan't." "How foolish,—I've fucked it
|
||
twice,—let me feel it, and you feel my cock,—let me look at it,—I'm
|
||
sure it's lovely." She got on to the bed after a little resistance, took
|
||
my pego in her fist, and I got my fingers in her crack. "A delicious
|
||
fuck you are,"—then she let me pull up her clothes and look. "My
|
||
God what a lovely cunt,—how deliciously you join your wet lips to
|
||
mine,—how you move,—I shall never forget it to the last moment of
|
||
my life,—oh! let me." "I musn't,—I would, but I'm frightened." "How
|
||
foolish,—it's not an hour since my prick was in you,—what is the harm
|
||
of doing it another time?" "Will you go then?" "Yes." Gently Mrs.———
|
||
opened her thighs. Our backsides were soon at the short wriggles. "It's
|
||
big, isn't it?" "Oh! don't," said she, "I shall spend." My remark,
|
||
tallying perhaps with something which was passing in her own mind
|
||
fetched her, and me with her instantly.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When it was over I would not go. "No I'll do it again." "That's
|
||
nonsense," said she, "you know you can't, even if you try, and you're
|
||
only making me anxious." We laid side by side talking, for she liked
|
||
the subject. I had a most buttock-stirring letch on me, and to her
|
||
astonishment in about an hour I produced another stiff one. One
|
||
persuasion is very much like another with the same woman; each time I
|
||
had less difficulty, for she liked the poking. Dusk was coming on, she
|
||
got lights, she fetched some liquor, and after the liquor I got her to
|
||
lay on the sofa (for we then had gone downstairs), and on pretence
|
||
of kissing her quim I got her to open her thighs wide, and saw in the
|
||
twilight what I had seen before, large and ugly inner-lips. For all that
|
||
I fucked her again, after frigging myself up gently to stiffness, and
|
||
fucked as if it was the last bout with a woman I was ever going to have.
|
||
Then I left at her earnest entreaties before her sister returned. I had
|
||
been there six hours.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I called on Jenny next day. She was in a way. Her sister directly she
|
||
had returned home said she must go and see her husband; and spite of
|
||
Jenny's entreaties not to leave her alone, had gone and never returned
|
||
all night. Jenny could not make out the reason, but thought that she
|
||
went away expecting to find her husband with a woman. She returned to
|
||
sleep as usual on the Monday night with Jenny, I found subsequently.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
That day I went off without poking Jenny, and slunk away ashamed. I
|
||
was done up with poking her sister. Jenny seemed astonished, but said
|
||
nothing.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Afterwards I got out of Jenny cautiously all I wanted to know about her
|
||
sister. The result was, that finding on the next Sunday fortnight, Jenny
|
||
was again going out with her young man, and the sister again would be
|
||
left in the house, I went there. The woman's astonishment was great, and
|
||
I believe she was genuinely distressed at seeing me. I attacked her for
|
||
a time fruitlessly, she would not move from the street-door. "Did you
|
||
not swear when I let you do it the last time, you would never come near
|
||
me again, and never tell any one?" said she.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I could not deny it, had great difficulty with her, and thought I never
|
||
should succeed. For full an hour with her back against the wall of the
|
||
passage did she stand, refusing to move. I pulled up her clothes, felt
|
||
her cunt, knelt on the mat, got my head up her petticoats, my nose on
|
||
her motte, my mouth on her thighs and cunt, my hand round her marbly
|
||
buttocks, and held her kissing, sniffing, and groping my fingers between
|
||
her bum-cheeks, and the red orifice which I wanted to plug. In her
|
||
struggles to prevent me she once nearly fell, but she got away.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
But what woman who has been fucked by a man could withstand an hour's
|
||
persistent feeling, cunt-kissing, baudy talk, and beseeching. I
|
||
conquered, and fucked her on the sofa. She did not rush out to wash her
|
||
cunt as she had done at our first meeting, there was no water near. I
|
||
had her again and again. At each assault when the pleasure overtook her,
|
||
she had the same mouth-sucking and arse-wagging. When our love-making
|
||
was over, I gave her two pounds. I had offered it her before in the
|
||
passage, but she had knocked it out of my hand. When she took it she
|
||
said, "Ah! it's an awful thing to be poor!" I shall tell of another
|
||
woman who made the same excuse to herself for getting her lust
|
||
satisfied, or yielding.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
That satisfied me, and I never had her again in the house. A letch for
|
||
her came again about two months afterwards,—why? God only knows, for
|
||
then at times I was having her sister, another woman, Louisa Fisher,
|
||
and lastly Sarah Mavis. The old couple had returned, Jenny had a
|
||
fellow-servant; I could only get a poke up her with difficulty on the
|
||
Sundays, which her young man did not see her. I took her to a baudy
|
||
house for an hour or so, then she went to church, and heard the text,
|
||
because her Mistress always asked her what the text was when she went
|
||
home. It was a supposition that she went to church on a Sunday.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
I knew where Jenny's sister lived, and the place where she worked. It
|
||
was now dark about six o'clock. I waylaid her on her way home on the
|
||
high-road which was well lighted and full of people. I walked with her,
|
||
but she prayed me not to do so, for her husband came partly the same
|
||
road, and sometimes met her. What would happen if he met her with a
|
||
swell walking by her side. I could not persuade her to go to a house.
|
||
No,—she was not a loose woman, though she knew what she had done,—I
|
||
had done her more harm than I had any idea of, already,—why injure
|
||
her?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
The more she objected, the more I longed for her. At last under solemn
|
||
promise that I would go away after, we turned up a short street leading
|
||
into a lane by garden-grounds, and there up a fence I fucked her. Away
|
||
she went, and I never saw her afterwards to speak to, though I have
|
||
passed her without taking notice. I think that in that parting fuck I
|
||
had all the pleasure, she none.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny's Mistress had been taken ill at the seaside, and kept there a
|
||
month longer than was intended. Owing to this my complete enjoyment of
|
||
Jenny's charms was prolonged, and to that I owed the second Sunday's
|
||
fucking of Jenny's sister. Old Mr. W——- came up to London twice, and
|
||
once nearly caught me in the house. I had written to say I had called
|
||
at their home, and had never found their servant out. The lady wrote to
|
||
thank me, and in writing to my mother, said how much obliged they were
|
||
for my calling; but my wife said she thought the servant (Jenny) was a
|
||
sly sort of minx, and wondered how they could be so foolish as to leave
|
||
her in the house by herself.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
When they came to town I was for a time very intimate with them, which
|
||
pleased them much. Jenny used to let me out at the garden-gate, and
|
||
leave the gate unlocked. Instead of going away, I used to hide in the
|
||
shrubs, Jenny would come back, close the street-door ajar, and a few
|
||
minutes afterwards come out again very quietly. Then up against an
|
||
ivy covered wall we poked, and she went indoors with wetted privates.
|
||
Sometimes after waiting I had to go away unsatisfied, she not appearing,
|
||
sometimes rain prevented us,—all of which was very annoying.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Fucking her in fact became a matter of anxiety. She had to dodge her
|
||
fellow-servant as well as her Master and Mistress, and we copulated in
|
||
fear and trembling. In the midst of the work she has left me because
|
||
of some scare; once she went off saying, "Oh! there is Missus' bell
|
||
ringing,—oh!"—and uncunting me, off she ran. One night we went on
|
||
to the flower-beds between two large trees, and the next day the old
|
||
gentleman remarked that some man had got over the wall into his garden,
|
||
and he should tell the police. If there was moonlight we were done. One
|
||
night latish she was sent to fetch some butter. I waited, and we fucked
|
||
up against some palings. Unfortunately the butter was let fall out of
|
||
the basket on to the gravel. We went back for more, but the shop was
|
||
then shut, so she had to take home the dirty butter, and make the best
|
||
story she could about it. On Sundays when at the baudy house, the girl
|
||
was awfully frightened lest she should be seen, and we used to walk
|
||
there on opposite sides of the way, I going in first. Then we went away
|
||
with similar precautions,—but I began to get very tired of this, having
|
||
indeed had enough of her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Jenny had lost all fear of being in the family way, and poked freely,
|
||
but she never ceased bewailing her poor young man; though at length my
|
||
tool had become to her a thing to be longed for. The young man had money
|
||
left him, quitted his place, and Jenny left to be married. I heard of
|
||
them for many years afterwards, they opened a shop, then a larger one,
|
||
and so on, till at length he became (I found this quite recently) the
|
||
mayor of the town,—if not it was some one of the same name, and in the
|
||
same line of business. He was much respected, and Jenny his wife was
|
||
equally so. They had no children up to the time when the old lady her
|
||
former Mistress, died; and for aught I know they may still be living in
|
||
the town of———.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
One night some time before she left her situation, we spoke of her
|
||
sister. "She is in the family way again," said she, "and in such a way
|
||
about it, and so is he,—the night she left me to sleep by myself, she
|
||
went home to her husband, because she suspected there was another
|
||
woman there;—well that night she declared he did not let his stuff go
|
||
outside,—he says he did,—they quarrel, he says it's her fault, and she
|
||
says it's his."
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p>
|
||
Then it seemed evident to me that after the heavy fucking I gave her
|
||
that day, that she feared being in the family way; so went home, and
|
||
incited her man to fuck her, and enable her to say that the child was
|
||
his, and of course it might have been, though it might have been mine.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<center>
|
||
FINIS VOLUME THREE
|
||
</center>
|
||
|
||
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>
|
||
<hr>
|
||
<br>
|
||
<br>
|
||
|
||
|
||
</body>
|
||
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